:ny9 :ny9

hehe gypsy!!!!!

Oh yeah, just friggin lovely.
M

disease that is.....

well im on day one too, its cool though cuz i ent never gonna let my alkie head over rule my sober head again. Well just 4 2day!

+ i felt like sh1t all day

:headbang:

k all, thats day one done, im off to bed now c ya 2moz
chris

Hi Chris, well done on getting right back on the wagon mate! You just saved yourself a potential nightmare there.
Hey, I have been sober twice as long as you now lol! Only kidding with you mate!

No worries all, its day 2 and i feel fresh and rareing to go for it again. sh1t i didn't learn to ride a bike till i'd fell off a couple of times rite!

I'm proud of you for getting back straight away chris :).

k well i made it home without stopping off, but sh1t how hard was it to do, i felt ok 2 day till like 3 oclock then all the old fkn feelings kicked in , "ill just get a half of vody on the way home no one will know and any way i can handle it" i realy had to fight myself to loose the thoughts, i sorta wished i still had the hangover like yesterday id of cut my throat rather than drank yesterday. I just had to hold on to my self belief and summon the fighter in me to get out of my alcoholic head and up untill now victory is mine.
Its my home group 2nite but at the moment i think im better off staying at home, i dont want to miss it but im safe here for now.
The four fkn horsemen came and plagued me 2day as well but thats what i was told would happen and i chose to ignore the advice, like a d1k head.

anyways inabit
chris

Oh Chris..I know what you are going through.
I actually bought mouthwash yesterday with alcohol in it. Never thought I would be reduced to that tactic but it seems I have.
Good luck today!
Melissa

so, how are all of you today? this is a great post, so much support going on here. keep it up, and stay sober! k

Tj your picture is so beautiful...You're so full with energy and so happy in that one...
so nice!

Im realy getting confused this time round!. I suppose when i quit before the last time it was all new to me, i mean id tried sooo many times to stop drinking , all to no avail even with AA and docs meds. I guess id reached my bottom and decided to follow the advice id picked up on all fronts, and for 133 days i stayed clean of alcohol. Then in a moment of illdicipline, maddness, stubbon pride call it what you like i decided to ignore the fact that i didnt have to drink to face up to lifes probs and i picked up just for one day.
Today is day three of this new chapter in my recovery and i realy cant get to grips with the fact that im getting all the old feelings of obbsession and craving again just like before.I dont understand how this can be when i only drank for one day, yes i know all the medical stuff says it will hapen as does AA litrature, but the strength of these feelings are unbieleaveable, certainly worse than the first time round. Very scary indeed.
But one things for certain i want to get back to the freedom i had before this slip and I will go the extra mile to achieve it. I know that i should have gone to a meeting last night but the way my thinking was id of used it as an excuse to get out and buy booze, so im glad i stayed home.
Bee !! ive never thought about mouth wash and alcohol, but certainly one to steer clear of. I realy hope that you can get back to where you were soon, cuz your so worth it refind that strength M not time to go to the dark side yet.

inabit chris

Well done Chris for doing what you thought was right yesterday and being strong enough to see and admit that a meeting would have been a chance for you to stop at the shops. I'm sure you will be back to your full strength really soon and will be back on track, well actually you already are, you realised you don't want that life anymore and you chose to stop after one day. Good on ya.

Hang on in there.

Hey TJ, how you doing today? And Stone how's things going with you?

Stay strong

Come on guys tell us how your doing today, hope you still got all your digits wolf after that pruning.

chris

Perhaps I can join in the fun???

I managed to let my anger, pride, lonliness, controlling nature, etc. get the better of my judgement and drank after 40 days (Sunday). I'm back on Day 3 today. No withdrawals, and I threw out the bottle myself on Monday am.

I've no interest in drinking again. Just don't want it. It didn't help ANYTHING!!! My problems did not go away, just got worse, didn't get less lonly or angry - I guess that's a good sign.

TinLizzy

All digits still exactly where they should be, the tree/plant/weed type thing looks a bit worse for wear though, lol

I am just away to head to work and am freaking out some, no actually freaking out loads, ah well here goes nothing eh!

Hope you are all doing good today, hows you, Chris, Stone, Tj and Tinlizzy? Hope you are all still strong? I just feel like blubbering today....ah well such is life!!! Could be worse I could be the plant in my garden that has been seriously hacked and chopped, but at least I can see outa my window lol