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Pour me, pour me, pour me another drink....

Old 05-11-2007, 07:23 AM
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"For the moment, life is good"
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Pour me, pour me, pour me another drink....

13 days sober and wondering if I am going to make it to 14? I got out of the hospital on Monday and the week has been good until last night. Yesterday I got so much done. Carpets shampooed, furniture moved and the rest of the house cleaned. Made a nice dinner and watched a bit of TV with hubby. My friend called last night and we were discussing a couple of things that were on my mind, from past experience, triggers. Well, my hubby overheard my conversation and became very pissed off, that seems to be the only emotion he has, and so the fight started. After 2 hours of arguing with him I saw that nothing was going to change so I told him to just go to bed and leave me to my thoughts. And think I did. Arguing with him is what sent me over the edge on April 27th, which ended with me taking alot of prescription medication with alcohol, hence leaving me fighting for my life.
I am DETERMINED today to not let him break me down any further. I am DETERMINED to fight the urge to drink and get through today. I want sobriety so badly. I want to feel normal. I want to feel good about myself. Today I WILL feel good about myself. I will do things that I know make me feel good. Putting on makeup, cleaning my house, playing with my dogs, taking pictures, gardening, crocheting, painting. I WILL NOT DRINK !!!!!

Laceyhearts.....
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Old 05-11-2007, 07:29 AM
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you can do this, laceyhearts. i admire your determination. i just put on a little make-up myself, and i do feel better for it. blessings, k

fyi - you can come to my house and clean, if it'll help
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Old 05-11-2007, 07:29 AM
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Hi Lacey,

I'm sorry that your husband is not being supportive of your sobriety. But, sometimes that's just the way it is. You can still move forward and stay sober. Have you tried talking to him when things are calm to let him know how you feel? It could be that he is just very emotional about the situation.
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Old 05-11-2007, 08:18 AM
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Hi Laceyhearts,

I can identify with the strong emotional response you described - that was classic for me - fight with the bf - screaming match - it would end with me drinking or taking pills or both. that whole 'i'll show you, i'll hurt me' mindset.
You did the right thing by removing yourself from the situation. By choosing different responses, you will grow stronger. And maybe he'll learn something! Glad you are celebrating another sober day with us.
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Old 05-11-2007, 01:24 PM
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It has been my experience, my self-will is useless. I tried over and over and over to get sober doing it my way, exercising my will. Nodda.

It's my lack of power, which is my dilemma.

I can't quit on my own, I need to ask my Higher Power (God) for help.
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Old 05-11-2007, 01:47 PM
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Way to go LH, glad to hear it. Keep it up.

Levi
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Old 05-11-2007, 02:19 PM
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you did the right thing LH...we're all here for ya...keep the faith.
D
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