Pilgrim

96 hours. I am at work. In the middle of some stressful negotiations. It has all gone crazy and people are coming at me every two seconds with new requests and demands. This used to be when I went out for a drinking session. I want to do that and I have lost sight of my serenity and purpose right now. I can't leave the office until the contract is signed. I am in the office with other alchies and I can feel their desire to leave and drink under the pressure as well.

HEEEEEEELLLLLLPPPPPP.

Someone post and remind me why I don't want to go and have a drink after work.

I went to a meeting at lunch. All was well. I was serene. This has come on me like a ton of bricks.

xXBacktoBlackXx

I understand this feeling. You really don't want to have a drink, though. I caved into an urge earlier today and now I feel like I was when I first started. You really don't want to feel like you're back at square one, which will be what it feels like after you drink.

Golfman

Don't Drink Knucklehead. It Will Do Nothing But Make Things Worse. You Know That Steph.

Be Kind To Yourself No Matter What The Circumstances Are. You Will Love Yourself For It In A Little While.

Love Ya,
Ed

Golfman

Wow, Dylan, Hendrix, etc. Just my kind of musice. Although I must say that I grew up with them. So, I guess you could say I'm into "Geezer Rock." Love all that stuff from the timeframes on your profile.

At 21, how did you come about be exposed to all that good stuff? Your parents?

Yours in sobriety,
Ed

scootinbabe

don't let them (and it) win.

you are stronger than you know.

minute by minute. this too shall pass. take deep breath.

don't let external chaos affect your core being. you can do this.

you are doing the right things: you added to your arsenal at the meeting at lunch and now you are calling in reinforcements on-line. come here and post. go to gym. escape to movie. you can do this. you ARE doing this.

IO Storm

Ahhh Pilgrim....

Remember...not everyone in the world drinks.

Not everyone in an individual country drinks.

Not everyone in any given city or providence drinks.

Not everyone in the office drinks!

Think the disease be tellin' lies...


Love,



Sherry

SaTiT

you'll feel like shiet
you might spend the night having a conversation with the toilet.
You might kill an innocent person if you drive drunk
you might make an arss of yourself
you might dy
you'll defernently feel like crap and hung over in the morning.
you'll feel sicker than you are now for many for days.
you might end up in bed and have sex with someone that you don't know
you might go to jail
you might feel suicidal for the next week
and you'll be really ****-off at yourself in the morning

Pilgrim

OK. Eating smarties. On the phone. I will be able to leave soon and find some peace. FAR OUT! I just need to make sure when I leave that I go to my CAR and don't stop anywhere on the way home. One foot in front of the other. Thanks for being there guys. First time I ever asked for help before picking up.

IO Storm

YAY.......

Here is a slogan that helped me in the past...simple.

DON'T DRINK NO MATTER WHAT!

Love ya Steph,



Sher

ayla zaire

don't do it, my friend.....make a little plan in your head to reward yourself with something healthy for making through the day......a trip to get good coffee and read books....or just turn the phone off, take a hot bath and watch a stupid girl movie......whatever you love to do, it will help take your mind off of drinking, and you will deserve a treat for making it through the day.......

don't drink just for today, girl.....just make it till bedtime, and you will be so proud of yourself.....and, of course i'll be proud of you....

big hugs sweetie....
ayla

scootinbabe

here's another--courtesy of tamtam:

when all else fails, go to bed!

Dee74

Please don't give in to It, Steph...It's not your friend. We are. We love ya. Kick It's butt !

D

Pilgrim

I am going to my car now. I have to get out of here. I will do some grocery shopping on the way home and let you know when I get there. Thank you soooooooo much everyone.

By the way, has anyone ever prayed in their toilet at work before me???????

scootinbabe

too funny steph! i'm just imagining all the many things that we've all done in toilets that were probably much worse than praying! tee-hee!

i've prayed just about everywhere.


you are making it! one minute.... you are!!

ayla zaire

just make it home, and relax the best you can....we're here for you, sweetie.....

love you!

Dee74

Go, Steph !!
D

Pilgrim

OK. Phew. Made it home. I am cosy now and safe. Ayla - I picked up a movie, made myself a yummy dinner and came straight here.

I have no idea why I am not in a bar right now. Well I do but it is a miracle. You know I couldn't call anyone in that situation. I was surrounded and on the phone non stop.

I did not enjoy that.

Thank you SR and thanks God and AA and BB and everyone and everything for getting me through. I cried with relief a wee while ago. If I was drinking, I would be crying as well.

Just goes to show huh? We have to keep with the maintenance.

Love you guys more than you know.

Off to watch my movie.

xxxxxoooooo

Dee74

have a great night Steph - I'm proud of ya !
D

c'est la vie

hey steph, you do too know why your not in a bar right now! I think Satit gave a really good list for you.

Way to go on making good choices. Each good choice made in a bad situation makes you stronger. You're getting stronger as you read this. It's perfectly OK to cry. Some of the tears may be grief of leaving your best friend alcohol, and some are tears of joy for finally feeling free.

Keep posting.

Pilgrim

Hi C'est. Right now I feel absolutely no grief about losing the alcohol. Only 100% relief that I didn't go back to the nightmare of it. It can go take a running jump and how dare it creep up on me like that. Well - I have the tools now so it can just **** off.

Thanks for caring. Everyone helped so much. I am going to bed sober tonight!!