"Real Alcoholic"
 

-- warning this is simply a rant... I am sick of this stupid thought that I keep having perhaps the thought will keep cropping up but it is anoying---

I keep having thoughts that I am not a real alcoholic.

You see... I never ended up on the streets... I never missed work as a result of my drinking. I never drank in the morning. I rarely drank before noon... My wife wasn't even convinced my problem was that bad...

--

So perhaps I don't need AA... perhaps I can drink socialy again.


WTF... ok... dummy... you want to risk it...

so I am going to stop comparing myself to the "real alcoholic" and start comparing myself to the normal person... a "real social drinker"



Normal people don't realize they picked up someone elses beer and shrug their shoulders and finish it...

Normal people don't notice that beer is (brand x) that always gives you a head ache within an hour or so... and finish it anyways.

Normal people don't drink things they find taste repulsive... (I hate gin... and I ran out of vodka and drank 2 rock glasses full of gin one day... ok more than once)...

Normal people don't pass out in their kids bed trying to read a bed time story.

Normal people don't drink and drive 2-3 time a week...

Normal people don't drive when they have double vision... thinking if they cover one eye they can't have double vision and will be able to drive.

Normal people don't have a name for said driving style...

Normal people don't have blackouts.

Normal people get a new beer if theirs is warm or skunky... they don't chug it and get another. (well maybe if you can't afford it)

Normal people don't skip lunch so they don't gain weight from all the beer they will be drinking that night.

Normal people don't count their beers and think 7 (anything less than a 12 pack is a no brainer) isn't enough for today and go out to buy more before lunch.

Normal people don't grab 2 or more beers at a time when they go to the fridge when they are drinking alone...

Hey normal people... the "real social drinker" doesn't drink alone!

Normal people don't loath those stupid 8 ounce glasses they are serving the beer in.

Normal people don't walk into a bar have the bar tender serve them a beer without asking... drink the 22oz beer in less than 5 minutes and have the bar tender serve them another with asking because she knows...

Normal people don't refill their glass of vodka when their spouse goes to the bathroom so they won't know how much they have had.

Normal people think 3 martini's is the limit... not a good start...

Did I mention... normal people don't drink alone... and don't black out...

You dumb nut... what is your problem... ok you are not a real alcoholic but go ahead try to moderate again... keep at it... and you will graduate...

I don't know if I heard it here or an AA meeting... someone said you don't decide one day you are an alcoholic and they give you your fingerless gloves and assign you a street corner...

Hey bonehead... don't you see the gift in front of you... all these AA folks telling you over and over... that they came into the rooms... didn't think they were as bad as this guy or that guy... they went back out... and became that guy... or worse...
---

Accept the gift... stop fighting...

---------------------------------

love it I have so done most of tose things Thanks for letting me know I'm not alone

That's a great list Debaucher. I'm gonna print it out so I can read it whenever I have the mistaken idea that I am "normal".

I just reread that... and thought to myself... do normal people count their beer before lunch?

Normal people don't have to make a list.. ;)

I only drank on weekends. I had a good job, two cars, a lovely wife, two beautiful little girls, money in the bank, etc.

It's not what's on the outside that we need to look at, it's what's on the inside.

If you remove the alcohol from the alcoholic, you still have the "ism"

So true

May I add, normal people don't refill the 1/2 gallon vodka bottle with water and then make sure they buy a pint or 1/5 to "fix" it before anyone else realizes it's all water.

My long term dismal cold depression
is why I decided to quit drinking.

At about 3 months sober
it lifted and has not returned.

While this is not always true for everyone
sobriety is worth exploring! JMO

This thread outta be interesting
Thanks Dee..:)

Hi debaucher,
I finaly addmitted to all on your list, only then could I admit to being powerless over alcohol and that my life had become unmanageable .

chris

I don't know what a real alcoholic is

I do know, i didn't get aressted every time i got drunk,
but everytime i got aressted i was drunk. And the frequentcy
of arrest where getting closer and closer. The charges were
getting greater and greater.

Good words, debaucher. So very familiar, and in my case, so recent. This is why I read posts.

great post debaucher. I've been kicking the same recurring thought process around a lot recently, you're post rings a lot of bells for me. Thanks

Great post, thank you very much, I needed that today....

debaucher, this is fantastic! It really really really struck a cord with me since I struggle with the whole 'alcoholic' label.

Thank you thank you thank you.. just what I needed to see with another weekend looming.

I wish I could do what you are trying to do..I tried that deal a hunderd times if I tried it one time.
Life wise,I am in the same position..$$,family,self employed.Eventually,I found out I DIDN'T HAVE A DRINKING PROBLEM!! I HAD A HOSPITAL PROBLEM AS EVERY TIME I DRANK,I ENDED UP IN THE HOSPITAL!!.
Not fun,,It took a while,but kept gettin worse..
In my opinion,the same type of thing will happen to you.I wouldn't wish that feeling on anyone..

I have done most of them, but a few that hit home were.

-refilling the glass when the wife goes to the bathroom
-falling asleep while reading bedtime stories
-driving with only on eye. I actually learned to close my left eye, so my wife could not tell that I needed to close one eye.
-skipping meals to make room for the alcohol calories.

A couple more for me, normal people;
-actually taste the beer or wine to discern if it is any good
-drink regular beer. For me, it was not worth the effort. Only the stuff over 8% alcohol was worth it.

I figured I wasn't a "real" alcoholic because I (almost) never drank alone. I (hardly ever) drank in the morning and I (usually) didn't drink every day.

But whenever I DID drink...there was no off button. And no matter how far apart or close together were the drinking events... they always turned out the same way.

So I figured I (probably) wasn't an alcoholic, I just couldn't drink. And since I was able to stop (can you say, HP, good timing, early progression of the disease?) without a program, I figured that PROVED I was not a "real alcoholic".

Except that I am. And I confirmed that during my journey in a different 12-step program. And had it reconfirmed when I found other 12-step programs that "fit".

I love your list Debaucher. I can remember having a converstation with my best girlfriend about the signs of alcoholism and whether we 'qualified'. I was worried that we did, she was sure than we didn't.

That was 35 years ago. Today, I am sober due to reasons I will never quite fathom and she is just finishing up another year in jail and another marriage.

Thanks for the post, Debaucher. I think I will copy this one into my daily reader.

Normal people don't wonder where they are when they wake up.

Normal people KNOW what happened to their clothes.

Normal people don't wonder who is in their shower when they wake up.

Normal people don't have to call three bars to find which one they left their car behind the night before.

Normal people don't NEED the one phonecall.

Great thread! Way to keep things lively!