What is your most hysterical drunk?
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: MA.
Posts: 1,719
What is your most hysterical drunk?
Hello to all! I am new here. I am impressed with the wealth of information, the support and love expressed by others, and the professionalism of SR.
Is there anyone that has experienced a drunk that was truly sad but funny? My times are to numerous to count and I am still learning from them. I have learned in life that sometimes it helps to laugh at ourselves after we have learned from a hardship we have caused ourselves.
Here's my story.
The Baseball Feild
I once had a boyfriend that I drank with, and WE had some crazy moments. We had just started dating, about a month when....
One day we decided to take a ride to the package store and then go park by a cranberry bog. The view was beautiful and aroused us to explore one another. After a few drinks I decided I wanted to go "parking" at the baseball feild. We drove on about a mile and parked. We stepped out of the vehicle and found a secluded area of bushes. This area was not far from the road. Well, as WE explored one another, a vehicle stopped and a man asked my boyfriend what he was doing to me. My boyfriend replied, "What does it look like we are doing?" The vehicle sped off and my boyfriend tried to put me back together. You see I was silly drunk. The next thing I knew was, my boyfriend was being escorted to a police vehicle and I was being placed in a ambulance. My boyfriend spent the night in jail PC'd and I was sent to the hospital. I simply told the staff at the hospital that ALL was consentual. I was sent home a few hours after. My boyfriend showed up the next morning. He told me that he told the police it was consentual and THEY would have done the same thing. Quite a bit of laughter surfaced among the police.
We are no longer together, another sad chapter of my life. A relationship cannot survive addicted to one another, or any chemical addiction. BUT as painful as that situation was, today I can laugh at the sheer madness of The Baseball Feild.
What's your story??
Is there anyone that has experienced a drunk that was truly sad but funny? My times are to numerous to count and I am still learning from them. I have learned in life that sometimes it helps to laugh at ourselves after we have learned from a hardship we have caused ourselves.
Here's my story.
The Baseball Feild
I once had a boyfriend that I drank with, and WE had some crazy moments. We had just started dating, about a month when....
One day we decided to take a ride to the package store and then go park by a cranberry bog. The view was beautiful and aroused us to explore one another. After a few drinks I decided I wanted to go "parking" at the baseball feild. We drove on about a mile and parked. We stepped out of the vehicle and found a secluded area of bushes. This area was not far from the road. Well, as WE explored one another, a vehicle stopped and a man asked my boyfriend what he was doing to me. My boyfriend replied, "What does it look like we are doing?" The vehicle sped off and my boyfriend tried to put me back together. You see I was silly drunk. The next thing I knew was, my boyfriend was being escorted to a police vehicle and I was being placed in a ambulance. My boyfriend spent the night in jail PC'd and I was sent to the hospital. I simply told the staff at the hospital that ALL was consentual. I was sent home a few hours after. My boyfriend showed up the next morning. He told me that he told the police it was consentual and THEY would have done the same thing. Quite a bit of laughter surfaced among the police.
We are no longer together, another sad chapter of my life. A relationship cannot survive addicted to one another, or any chemical addiction. BUT as painful as that situation was, today I can laugh at the sheer madness of The Baseball Feild.
What's your story??
Member
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 401
While my girlfriend was on a business trip I decided to surprise her by planting the whole front yard with her fav flowers. She came home the next day and by the evening I was so drunk that I went outside to get some air and I threw up all over the main flowerbed. Classy!!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Murfreesboro, TN
Posts: 595
I had been to my bosses house several times and knew my way around the place pretty well. We had a Christmas party at work that spilled over to his house in the evening. Of course I was far past drink when I walked in the door. I hadn't been there in a few months, so when I turned to walk into another room I ran straight into the wall. The door had been there before, but I hadn't been there since they had remodeled that part of the house. That night as my wife was driving us home, I kept pointing out to her all the fire hydrants that were walking around. The next day at work, my boss and I alternated throwing up in the store in between taking care of customers.
I know this one's not quite as juicy as some would like. But give me some time, I'll remember one that will probably only arouse me.
I know this one's not quite as juicy as some would like. But give me some time, I'll remember one that will probably only arouse me.
Becoming a Butterfly
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: New York, NY
Posts: 904
Having a long time sober myself, I don't remember much of it as funny. I'm not trying to be a purist here. The funny times just aren't very funny in retrospect. Maybe it's all the years I've had to watch drunk people in action.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 33
drunken adventures...smiles on face...hell those good times...what books and scripts to some of our greatest movies....drinking and pills and the fun stuff just isnt for me any more =(................................................ .......
Member
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Bay Area, CA
Posts: 14
Thanks for your post MissyMae!
I am a "new" person who is trying to become honestly sober for the first time in my life, and it has been a real struggle!
I read some of the posts that seemed to criticize you telling your story, but, while I am not a "professional" recovering alcoholic at all, I still think it's great to be able to laugh and find at least some humor in this painful struggle we all share.
I started trying to get sober a little over a month ago, and after about 7 days, I got kind of burnt out with how heavy and somber I was getting about my disease and addiction. I needed to lighten up a bit, and LAUGH! Laughing is good - it's healthy.
I was in a newcomer's AA meeting this past Monday night, and a person who spoke said that he had just come back to the meetings after taking 3 weeks off from them because everything just got too heavy and weird for him - he felt like he had overkill. (Note - that he told us that he DIDN'T drink during those 3 weeks he took off, but was feeling the urge to do so again, so he got himself right back into a meeting that night.)
Anyway - I thank you again for the story Missy. I will try to think of one of my own to share - I have a long, and colorful history of ridiculous antics I pulled while using alcohol. I hope I won't offend anyone if I share. Like I said, I think that it's good to lighten things up a little. After all, we are still the same people, drunk or not drunk - but that poisonous, insidious disease that we have makes us do some crazy things sometimes!!
-Katie
I am a "new" person who is trying to become honestly sober for the first time in my life, and it has been a real struggle!
I read some of the posts that seemed to criticize you telling your story, but, while I am not a "professional" recovering alcoholic at all, I still think it's great to be able to laugh and find at least some humor in this painful struggle we all share.
I started trying to get sober a little over a month ago, and after about 7 days, I got kind of burnt out with how heavy and somber I was getting about my disease and addiction. I needed to lighten up a bit, and LAUGH! Laughing is good - it's healthy.
I was in a newcomer's AA meeting this past Monday night, and a person who spoke said that he had just come back to the meetings after taking 3 weeks off from them because everything just got too heavy and weird for him - he felt like he had overkill. (Note - that he told us that he DIDN'T drink during those 3 weeks he took off, but was feeling the urge to do so again, so he got himself right back into a meeting that night.)
Anyway - I thank you again for the story Missy. I will try to think of one of my own to share - I have a long, and colorful history of ridiculous antics I pulled while using alcohol. I hope I won't offend anyone if I share. Like I said, I think that it's good to lighten things up a little. After all, we are still the same people, drunk or not drunk - but that poisonous, insidious disease that we have makes us do some crazy things sometimes!!
-Katie
Member
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: British Columbia
Posts: 98
I take my sobriety VERY seriously, but a little humour and self-deprecation is a far cry from glorifying being a substance abuser. I doubt that reading stories of vomit and violence and embarassment will move anyone to say, "I want that life back!"
Having said that, two (of hundreds) stories immediately come to mind:
I was once stopped for a road check after a full day of drinking (I already have one DUI under my sorry belt). The officer put his head in my car and I covered my mouth with my coat and said: "I'm on my way to the hospital, I have a horrible flu and can't stop vomitting."
He said: "You OK to drive?"
Me: "Yeah, I just want to stop puking."
He: "Drive safely."
Several years ago, I drank myself to a blackout (well, I did that as recently as two months ago). A girl who I just started dating came to my place at about 10 p.m. She told me this story, as I have no recollection...I let her into my apartment and talked with her for about an hour. Thing was...I was completely naked. After our chat, I urinated all over my bathroom floor, then went to sleep. Next morning, she said, "You must be a heavy sleep walker, because you sure were acting weird last night!"
Needless to say, that relationship didn't last very long.
No, I'm not proud of situations like that. But they are kinda funny in a twisted way.
Earl
Having said that, two (of hundreds) stories immediately come to mind:
I was once stopped for a road check after a full day of drinking (I already have one DUI under my sorry belt). The officer put his head in my car and I covered my mouth with my coat and said: "I'm on my way to the hospital, I have a horrible flu and can't stop vomitting."
He said: "You OK to drive?"
Me: "Yeah, I just want to stop puking."
He: "Drive safely."
Several years ago, I drank myself to a blackout (well, I did that as recently as two months ago). A girl who I just started dating came to my place at about 10 p.m. She told me this story, as I have no recollection...I let her into my apartment and talked with her for about an hour. Thing was...I was completely naked. After our chat, I urinated all over my bathroom floor, then went to sleep. Next morning, she said, "You must be a heavy sleep walker, because you sure were acting weird last night!"
Needless to say, that relationship didn't last very long.
No, I'm not proud of situations like that. But they are kinda funny in a twisted way.
Earl
Member
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Southern Oregon
Posts: 1,768
If you ask me, Laughter is the best medicine in the world. We all NEED to laugh, and I personally thank you for this thread missy.
Last christmas, I was good and ripped as usual at family functions. We were all in My folks living room. I thought it would be funny to grab my mom and dance with her, so I did. HUGE mistake! My pants were a little long on me if I wasnt wearing shoes, and my shoes were off. My mom stepped on my pant leg and we both went down. I pushed my mom towards the couch to make sure she would land on the couch. That made me go toward the coffee table where there was this big candle holder. My face went right into it, leaving a huge lump under my left eye. Felt like a marble was in there. Mom was fine as she did land on the couch thank god!!!! Next morning I woke up with a totally BLACK eye. I had that black eye for what seemed forever!!! LOL!!
Last christmas, I was good and ripped as usual at family functions. We were all in My folks living room. I thought it would be funny to grab my mom and dance with her, so I did. HUGE mistake! My pants were a little long on me if I wasnt wearing shoes, and my shoes were off. My mom stepped on my pant leg and we both went down. I pushed my mom towards the couch to make sure she would land on the couch. That made me go toward the coffee table where there was this big candle holder. My face went right into it, leaving a huge lump under my left eye. Felt like a marble was in there. Mom was fine as she did land on the couch thank god!!!! Next morning I woke up with a totally BLACK eye. I had that black eye for what seemed forever!!! LOL!!
Hope3
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Upstate, NY
Posts: 2,155
Hi missymae, you seem like a very nice person, so don't take this personally.
There are many alcoholics who have been very fortunate to not have lost a loved one or had something so terrible happen because of their addiction.
However, many have and can find no humor in the fact that they almost lost their life, killed a love one (behind the wheel) or know someone that has to have kidney analysis, you get the picture.
Me I fell a sleep at the wheel, the other person in the car is paralyzed.
I wish so much that this didn't happen, but it did, so know I can't think of a funny story about drinking. But hey, humor is good.. so I just think of the funny things that happen when I'm sober...
Want to here one, lol((((((((hope3)))))))
There are many alcoholics who have been very fortunate to not have lost a loved one or had something so terrible happen because of their addiction.
However, many have and can find no humor in the fact that they almost lost their life, killed a love one (behind the wheel) or know someone that has to have kidney analysis, you get the picture.
Me I fell a sleep at the wheel, the other person in the car is paralyzed.
I wish so much that this didn't happen, but it did, so know I can't think of a funny story about drinking. But hey, humor is good.. so I just think of the funny things that happen when I'm sober...
Want to here one, lol((((((((hope3)))))))
Last edited by hope3; 02-19-2007 at 08:42 PM. Reason: wrong name
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: MA.
Posts: 1,719
Hello to all that have responded here,
I am truly sorry if anyone has found this thread offensive, this was not my intention.
I too have had some drunks that were not funny. Each of our paths are different when using, some more painful.
I have had some drunks that I could find humor in, the insanity of it all, and I have learned that laughter is healing.
Again, I am sorry if I have caused anyone pain.
I am truly sorry if anyone has found this thread offensive, this was not my intention.
I too have had some drunks that were not funny. Each of our paths are different when using, some more painful.
I have had some drunks that I could find humor in, the insanity of it all, and I have learned that laughter is healing.
Again, I am sorry if I have caused anyone pain.
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