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Old 02-09-2007, 07:00 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Not sure if anyone will remember me, Hi, I'm back


I cant even remember the last time I was here. But I started drinking again and now I really need to stop, or it's going to kill me. This board/all of you guys gave me so much support in the past. I'm almost done with day 1. It's been quite the day, but I made it!! Cold sweats and shakes and tense as hell.
I have been drinking a case of light beer a day for forever it seems. My husband has actually put up with it. I think the guy must really love me, because he rarely drinks. Gambling was his vise, but he kicked that and I'm so proud of him for it!!

Anyway, I wanted to re-introduce myself. Any suggestions besides AA will be great.
My real name is Tracy, but I like my nickname tj.

I'm going to go and try to eat and watch a movie. I will check back in the morning. Thanks all!!
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Old 02-09-2007, 07:42 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Hi, tj- welcome back to day 1! Please keep coming back here to SR. You did it before you will do it again!!
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Old 02-09-2007, 08:02 PM   #3 (permalink)
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I don't think AA is the answer for everyone in fact I hate the whole idea of AA. I am going because I could really use some help. This will be the first time for me, I think I am going cos I could use some friends right now. I know I will have to keep my mouth shut for a while.
In a way, it will be an admittance to myself
that I am ******.

edit

I know I am ****** cos the more I try to stop the harder it gets.


By the way, I am going for my first time tomorrow. eek.
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Old 02-09-2007, 08:03 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Welcome back TJ

Here is a list for you to explore

Recovery Programs

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Alcoholics Anonymous
http://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org/?Media=PlayFlash

LifeRing Secular Recovery
http://www.unhooked.com

SMART
http://www.smartrecovery.org/

SOS - Secular Organisations for Sobriety
http://www.secularsobriety.org

Women for Sobriety
http://womenforsobriety.org/


Information and analysis about addiction treatment and harm reduction:

http://www.peele.net/

A useful AA reference:
Online AA resources (not official AA):
http://www.recovery.org/aa/

Moderation Management, the one group that deals with moderate drinking; useful for the guidelines:
http://moderation.org/

Some variations on 12 Step:

Agnostics AA:
http://agnosticaa.org/

Alcoholics Victorious (Christian 12 step):
http://www.alcoholicsvictorious.org/12-steps.html

Pagan approach to 12 steps:
http://members.aol.com/JehanaS/recovery.html

Another Christian recovery site:
http://www.celebraterecovery.com/message.asp

Rabbi Twerski's interpretation of the 12 Steps from a Jewish perspective:
http://www.a-1associates.com/AA/jacs_journal_2.htm

I do hope this is the time for you
to finally quit.
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Old 02-09-2007, 08:45 PM   #5 (permalink)
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I so did not want to go to an AA meetring tonight after work. Bad day at work and late getting out. I came home tolk my dog for a walk and sat at this desk to read S/R. It bought me back to sanity and I went to the AA meeting and felt so much better. Simple for me. No meetings No Sober!!!!
This disease is so clever. Skip a few meetings and I got you...........
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Old 02-10-2007, 04:59 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Just curious. When someone says "no AA", why do people still respond with suggestions for AA?

jane
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Old 02-10-2007, 06:50 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Thank you!! it's ok that some will mention their love for AA, I completely understand. I know it's a great program that have help millions of people. I just don't like it for myself. Tried it several times at several locations, and afterwards I felt like drinking more than ever. It's actually a trigger for me. ???

I slept last night!!!! it was actually the best night sleep I've had since I can remember! And I was worried about that all day yesterday LOL!

So, on to day 2. Hubby had to work today, so it will just be me and my cat. And you guys

Will you guys tell me about your first week sober and how it went for you? It's been so long since I quit, that I cant remember how my first week went and I'm actually kind of shocked at how well yesterday and last night went for me.

Also, over on the right, I used to be able to click on "more" smilies and a box would pop up with a whole bunch to choose from, but nothing happens now?
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Old 02-10-2007, 10:08 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Welcome !

See my post in what to expect thread. My first week was, ummmm, rough. You sound like you're doing OK, actually.

The smilies take about 2 minutes to load. There's like 400 of them.
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Old 02-11-2007, 09:11 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Ok cool, I'll go read that thread. yea, I'm surprised. I was afraid I would have one of the seizers that I read about. I'm starting day 3 now. All I have really is shakes and cold sweats. No headaches or anything. I did have some whopper nightmares last night. Also my stomach is doing weird stuff. Have a very "anxious" feeling when I get hungry.
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Old 02-11-2007, 09:13 AM   #10 (permalink)
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also, gag reflexes are very high when brushing teeth or coughing.
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Old 02-11-2007, 09:38 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Hi tj,
as long as you reach sobriety thats all that matters which ever path you take.
Write down how you've felt so far and keep it with you, then you can remind yourself when needed just how hard it was to get sober and hopefully prevent slips.
take care chris.
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Old 02-11-2007, 09:46 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Thank you Chris. I should do just that.
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Old 02-12-2007, 08:09 AM   #13 (permalink)
let it grow!
 
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sending you encouragement, tj. blessings, k
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Old 02-12-2007, 08:43 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Thank you

Day 4 starting.

No nightmares last night, but VERY "bizzar" dreams. I can handle those though. Still have cold sweats. Shakes aren't too bad this morning. Family and friends are behind me all the way and give me a lot of encouragement and tell me how happy they are that I'm doing this. They have been very worried about me.
I need to make amends with my brother and his fiance' sometime in the near future. I don't think I want to go there yet though.

Thank you for being here.
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Old 02-12-2007, 10:04 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Hi tj,
Glad that your getting through these times,they wont last forever!Its great that you have loving family & friends around you.They know the sober you from before and cant wait for that person to shine through again.I know I couldn't have made it this far without similar support from F&F.
Dont worry about the amends until you get yourself sorted,your brother will be getting feedback from the family re your progress and I bet he's happy for you to.
take care chris.
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Old 02-12-2007, 06:29 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Thanks Chris,
I sure hope things get better soon. Today (this afternoon) I have a really bad headache. I think I might have done too much stuff in the house today. As soon as hubby gets home and dinner is done, I'm tossing the dishes in the sink and going to bed. Hopefully tomorrow it will be gone. Feels like the worst headache I've ever had! Even hurts to blink
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Old 02-13-2007, 10:16 AM   #17 (permalink)
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day 5

day 5.
Headache is a little better this morning. Still have the dam cold sweats, I think thats what bothers me the most. Shakes really mellow out after meals, so I'm eating more. Drinking lots of water, gatorade and V-8. I think I'm going to take it easy today and watch some movies and get out of my head.

Also, I get these uncontrollable jerky movements in my arms and legs at times. Whats that called?? I'll just be sitting here and my leg will jerk? or arm, whatever.
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Old 02-13-2007, 10:25 AM   #18 (permalink)
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Red face

Awesome job on day five!!!!!!! I am on day two and I get really anxious as well. I think it might have to do with your blood sugar. ALcohol does something to your pancreas to mess with your blood sugar. I just keep eating! Have a good day, glad your headache is better. I am no expert but I do know that alcohol is a central nervous system depressant. Maybe that has something to do with the jerks. I am glad to be in the solution today, rather than in the problem. Peace, Lisa
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Old 02-13-2007, 02:33 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Hi Lisa!

Hi Lisa!!
Keep going! Day 2 is a real ripper, but you'll make it!! This is my best day so far. I took a power nap about 2 hours after I got up this morning, and I think that did me a world of good. Ate breakfast, and lights out LOL!
Hang in there, we can do this together 1 day at a time! Keep writing
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Old 02-13-2007, 03:55 PM   #20 (permalink)
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Hi tj
sorry that your going through the mill at the moment but it wont last forever.I read on your other thread that your going to try AA with your neighbour,thats good its worth another shot even if it screwed you up last time.Stay with your neighbour after the meet for as long as you can,with her being in the fellowship i'm sure she will help you if you crave for a drink.Sometimes in the rooms you can here your own story and that can be upsetting,but no more upsetting than going back to the torment of alcohol.Your doing just fine 5 days in and your strength and resolve will get you through,but if you can pick up a few tips from wherever along the way it will only help!.

Stick with it the new you will be worth waiting for!.
chris.
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