My first thread
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Miami, Florida
Posts: 13
My first thread
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Hello! I am trying to get some feedbak about some issues I am having with my husband. We started to go to the psicologist together but we are still stock in our issues. The main problem is that I hate to go partying, I never drinked and I don't smoke. My husband loves to do all and that has been a problem since the beggining of our relation. I tell him that I can't deal with him going to happy hour every week and that the main activity that rewards him is partying, drinkink and being with friends. He told me that he will not stop doing it b/c he feels that I am totally controlling him so he resents me for that. I will love to have a person with me that understands my needs. On the other hand, he is a good man and we love each other a lot but we know that this situation is hurting this relation at the point to end it. Does anywone have any advise for this situation?
Thanks!
Hello! I am trying to get some feedbak about some issues I am having with my husband. We started to go to the psicologist together but we are still stock in our issues. The main problem is that I hate to go partying, I never drinked and I don't smoke. My husband loves to do all and that has been a problem since the beggining of our relation. I tell him that I can't deal with him going to happy hour every week and that the main activity that rewards him is partying, drinkink and being with friends. He told me that he will not stop doing it b/c he feels that I am totally controlling him so he resents me for that. I will love to have a person with me that understands my needs. On the other hand, he is a good man and we love each other a lot but we know that this situation is hurting this relation at the point to end it. Does anywone have any advise for this situation?
Thanks!
not a greeter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: padmasana
Posts: 13,927
Hi brunette 
. You probably know by now that you can't change him.Only you know what you can and cannot live with. Maybe give the couselling a chance for awhile and work on yourself is the best advice I have.
. You probably know by now that you can't change him.Only you know what you can and cannot live with. Maybe give the couselling a chance for awhile and work on yourself is the best advice I have.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Miami, Florida
Posts: 13
Originally Posted by gypsy tears 
Hi brunette . You probably know by now that you can't change him.Only you know what you can and cannot live with. Maybe give the couselling a chance for awhile and work on yourself is the best advice I have.
. You probably know by now that you can't change him.Only you know what you can and cannot live with. Maybe give the couselling a chance for awhile and work on yourself is the best advice I have.Thanks! Any suggestions how to work myself?
Reach Out and Touch Faith
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: On a Sailboat
Posts: 3,871
Originally Posted by brunette
Thanks! Any suggestions how to work myself?
Al-Anon and Nar-Anon are the two main programs for those of us who have a family member who is an addict.
Member
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Pasadena, CA
Posts: 1,539
Member
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Pasadena, CA
Posts: 1,539
I may not get this exactly correct, but something like this:
You didn't CAUSE it
You can't CONTROL it
You can't CURE it
The 3 C's: Alanon basics.
It's an awesome group of people, they will understand and help, like you can not imagine, ever.
Go for it, it's YOUR life.
You didn't CAUSE it
You can't CONTROL it
You can't CURE it
The 3 C's: Alanon basics.
It's an awesome group of people, they will understand and help, like you can not imagine, ever.
Go for it, it's YOUR life.
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