misshobo

My husband drinks approx 60-90 beers @ week. And has done so for many years. His behaviour has changed and now wants a divorce. All he wants is to be alone and not answer to anyone or be responsable to anyone. I was cold cocked by the divorce although I felt we had grown apart but was happy that we were at the same place, now we could do something about it. I am not a drinker and his drinking increased after being fired from a job because he stuck up for a fellow under his supervision, that being at a Church. I am reeling in the position we found ourselves and take anti-depressents anlong with angxity meds. The words that come out of his mouth are hrtful, mean and cruel and I can only think of what his body is doing to itself. any insights would be helpful.

Sugah

Only your husband can determine if he's an alcoholic, but from the sounds of it, alcoholic or not, he's over the top.

The best suggestion I can give to you is to post on our friends and family board. I live with a sober alcoholic, and though some days are rough, I couldn't imagine dealing with my reactions if he was drinking. Any decisions you make are yours, but the friends and family folks can give you support and suggestions. You're not alone.

Peace & Love,
Sugah

Anna

It sounds like you are in a difficult situation. I hope you are able to spend some time taking care of yourself.

barb dwyer

Hi, misshobo -

maybe check out the al-anon pages ... there could be some information there that you're seeking.

best wishes -

c'est la vie

It's a great thing that you have come here to find some answers. The best thing you can do if take care of yourself and learn what you can about what's going on.

indigo

Sorry about your situation, a drunk has to know he's one and want to change, but there are things you can do try. The friends and family forum has a lot to offer if you go take peek.

indigo

greeteachday

Hi and welcome. I'm sorry for the reasons you are here, but glad you found SR.

There are many folks like you in the Friends and Family forum who are affected by a loved ones drinking. Sometimes just sharing with people who understand is helpful. Here is the link; I know they will welcome you and provide help in learning ways to help you feel better.

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ly-alcoholics/

Found

There is a chapter in the book "Alcoholics Anonymous" about spouses and employers. Some who took the decision to part company with the alcoholic and some who didn't. Either way can be right, so it would seem. (Am single, and still with my old employers at present, with multiple ailments)

I went through a church split during the 1990s and am just sticking my head out from under the rubble now ... I asked for specific ministry and the guy who referred me to someone else says he's praying for me ... so whatever works out, there's help of some sort even if I can't control it or know what form it is talking till after it happens ...

It strikes me how insightful you are about your hubby's body doing this to himself. My life has improved since I accepted my bodily differences since some newspaper cuttings (not related to alcoholism) caught my eye. I returned to drink again since, on and off, but haven't had one for 4 months at the moment.