Now what?

Old 09-29-2006, 07:54 PM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Charlotte, NC
Posts: 73
Now what?

I have been to AA meetings and I have been active on this site. I am prospecting inpatient/outpatient treatment providers. I now realize that I have a problem with alcohol. At the moment, I have no desire to drink. I am in early part of recovery (12 days without alcohol). People I have known that had substance abuse (alcohol and drugs) problems seemed to have disappeared after they hit rock bottom. Where are they? Will I have to disappear as well? I would like to disappear out of sheer embarrassment and shame. To stay sober, I will have to cut ties with those that close to me (including my family). My family will not accept that I have a mental health issue. I have told them numerous times about my condition. They won't accept that I have a mental flaw. They are in denial more than I ever was. The same holds true for close friends. Do I have to move far away and start all over? If so, how do I do that?
cubbie is offline  
Old 09-29-2006, 08:23 PM
  # 2 (permalink)  
Anna's Avatar
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 53,044
Hi Cubbie,

First of all, be proud of yourself for 12 days sober!

It is true that recovery often involves changes and sometimes major changes in our lives. If you have told your family ab out your problem and then will not accept the situation, you may have to distance yourself from them, at least for awhile. What I found when I began recovery, was that I started to recognize toxic people in my life. They began to stand out and I realized how harmful they were to me. I gradually removed every single one. I still speak to some of them, but there is no emotional connection anymore. I don't want it and I can't risk it. At the same time, wonderful people began to appear in my life. Of course I have met great people here at SR, but a few really amazing women appeared in my life. I think that's how the process works.

I don't think you need to make a decision about moving right away. Just take things slowly and look at people around you and see if they are people who care about you and people who can teach you things. Changing your outlook and attitude is the beginning of changing your life. But, don't feel that you have to tackle everything, all at once.
Anna is offline  
Old 09-29-2006, 08:27 PM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
CarolD's Avatar
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,741
Congratulations on your sober days!

I know must give yourself some time to
process your new situation.

My non drinking parents never understood my drinking
or my recovery. I think they felt it a reflection
on their way of life. We did not discuss it.

Friends? All my friends were drinkers.
Most drifted away the longer I was sober.
I made new friends in AA with the same goals
I was striving for.

I found a meeting with mostly single members
We had a blast!

Blessings to can find your sobriety!
CarolD is offline  

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