Notices

Stress-how to deal without drinking?

Old 09-17-2006, 10:57 AM
  # 1 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: FRIENDSWOOD, TEXAS
Posts: 500
Unhappy Stress-how to deal without drinking?

I was doing pretty well yesterday until my 18 yr old son went out in the evening and I worry a lot about him whether he is going to get int trouble or not and so he came home later then he was spposed to like an hour so it was about 10:45pm and my husband was going to the store and got me 2- 24 ounce beers cause I said my nerves were shot and so my son got home about 11:00pm and I didnt start drinking the 2 beers til about close to midnight so i dont know if that counts for drinking today or last night and I dont have a problem when things are going smoothly it is when stress flair up that I tend to want to drink even if it is just a couple of beers to calm my nerves - does anyone know how to deal with stress w/out drinking at all.
NEEDTOBESOBER is offline  
Old 09-17-2006, 11:54 AM
  # 2 (permalink)  
Member
 
aasharon90's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,201
Hi NTBS...Sharon Here..... parents do worry about there kids....esp. moms. I know..been there... done that.... still do at times.....Learning to let go and trust....its difficult.....I always told my kids that if they break that trust with me or their dad then it would take a long time to regain that trust....and so when they leave the house....we just have to trust that what we taught our kids was the right thing.....For me i could always tell if they were no doing right just by their actions....their demeaner....it never lies....and so they so far have been on the straight and narrow as far as i can tell. So no worries....

My kids would go out with a girl-friend or a boy-friend and we always told them that anything after 12 midnight was nothing but trouble...i know..been there done that...was drunk driving and had a horrble accident....

So i would lie awake some nights waiting for them to come home....sometimes it would be 11 but they were in the drive way and not on the highway....i still wanted them inside...oh well....they were safe off the roads. : )

With kids out and about it does way heavy on ones nerves...anxiety creeps in and takes a hold of u.

I normally let my husband stay awake and worry most of the time for the kids when they were younger. It took the pressure off me. Someone that is less likely to wig out if they r late would be the one to deal with that kind of situation.

I still worried at times but nothing to want to go out and drink or throw away my sobriety. Nothing today is worth it to go out as ive learned.

Now my 2 kids r in college one in a dorm and the other an apt. ...i dont worry about them like i use to,,,they r adults and independant. I trust them.

I also know and believe they are in good hands with the Man Up stairs.

Thanks for letting me share.
aasharon90 is online now  
Old 09-17-2006, 12:01 PM
  # 3 (permalink)  
Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
 
CarolD's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Serene In Dixie
Posts: 36,740
You did not drink the beer until your son was home.

I use prayer for easing stress.

Most of us had many false starts before we finally quit.
I had lot's of Day 1's!! Start again.

Blessings
CarolD is offline  
Old 09-17-2006, 12:13 PM
  # 4 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: FRIENDSWOOD, TEXAS
Posts: 500
yes, By the time my husband came home w/the beer my son was home, so I drank it anyway, I could come up with a million excuses, was thinking I would drink so there would be no more in the house or so my son wouldnt try to drink it or the stress I had gone through but the point is I drank it anyway. Feel bad about drinking.
NEEDTOBESOBER is offline  
Old 09-17-2006, 12:28 PM
  # 5 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
Anna's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
Posts: 61,326
It takes practice.

I found that the only way to deal with stress without drinking was to do it. Practice. It gets easier each time. You will find you have more confidence that you can do it.
Anna is offline  
Old 09-17-2006, 12:52 PM
  # 6 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: wherever my feet take me
Posts: 1,314
Stress without drinking, Anna is right it takes practice. sometimes you just have to feel the stress and remember it is only temporary. It sounds to me like it is more than stress that is causing you to drink because your son was home and you opened the beers anyway. Come on needstobesober. You can do this, I can do this, we can do this! So many people in the past kept telling me recovery is hard, but I can do it if I hung in there and I never listened or believed them, but now I know it is true know matter how hard it is it can be done.
Change4life is offline  
Old 09-17-2006, 03:51 PM
  # 7 (permalink)  
Paused
 
2dayzmuse's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Washington
Posts: 5,093
I think the fact that your husband is so willing to run out and buy you beer when you are stressed is a problem. How can that help your sobriety?

Can I tell you a story? Life is full of unexpected surprises. Some welcomed and some not so welcomed. When they arise, I would like to face them sober. There was a time when ever the phone rang the chances were that I had been drinking. I had to face the situation on the other end of the phone usually drunk, if not completely obliterated.

The time that sticks in my mind the most, and still haunts me is when I got the phone call that my father had a heart attack and was at the hospital. Of course, I was drunk and when I got there, I was told he was gone. My family had to deal with the fact they had lost a family member, but also had to deal with a drunk. I still feel bad about it and maybe that is why I appreciate being sober when the phone rings these days.

A while back my daughter got into some trouble and I got a phone call from the local Police Department. I had to take my daughter down to the Department to talk with the officer and to the Mother of her friend and a few of her other friends. Thank God I was sober! I was so glad I didn't have to face that drunk, trying to walk straight, trying to not slur my words, trying to make sense. I often think of situations like that now that I am sober and I'm grateful those days are behind me. I have no control over unwanted situations, but I have control over the condition I am in when I receive them.

Just something to think about. With kids, you never know what to expect. I want to be able to handle a situation at a drop of a hat, and know that I was thinking at my best, and not embarrass myself, and my kids by my drunken behavior.
2dayzmuse is offline  
Old 09-17-2006, 08:59 PM
  # 8 (permalink)  
Member
 
UnusedPortion's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Houston area
Posts: 56
In AA I am learning that anyone can quit drinking but you have to learn how to live sober. I think that you urgently need to get into recovery. Even the support alone while you choose what to think about the program has done a great deal for me.
UnusedPortion is offline  
Old 09-18-2006, 12:24 AM
  # 9 (permalink)  
Member
 
IndigoNA's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: USA
Posts: 100
Talk to your husband, explain to him what you're trying to do, tell him to go to Al-Anon is it's possible so he can help you out instead and not buy you beer. I'm not blaming you or him at all, he probabbly doesn't know better, but he would be a great support if he knew the tools and what to do and what not to do, and stop being co-dependant.
IndigoNA is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:11 AM.