Beatta28

Hi All,

I'm new here so I thought I would introduce myself. I'm a 28 yr old woman and would like to stop drinking. I do not know whether or not I am an alcoholic but I am most certainly a problem drinker.

Over the past year I went for periods of three then two then three months without drinking. Each of those periods of sobriety ended with one night binges that left me sick both physically and emotionally. In the past year I've been drunk less than 10 tems yet when I have been drunk, I've been very very drunk indeed. For me it seems there is either all or nothing and the sadness and regret I feel after I do get drunk makes it all very unworthwhile.

Most days I don't mind not drinking. In fact, I'm usually perfectly happy sitting in a bar with a soda in front of me. Every now and then though somehting snaps and I get angry that I can't drink like normal people, angry that I can't cut lose like I used to and I take that first drink. Unfortunately, that first drink is never just one drink. This is what happened to me on Saturday night and this is why I'm here now.

I need to figure out a way to become totally ok with my not drinking. I need to find a way to make these 2 to 3 month steches of sobriety last forever. I need to find the courage not to give in when I get angry or jealous and to be comfortable enough with myself to just order another soda. I'm hoping that I can find some support and encouragement here.

Thanks for "listening"!

Lollipop

Beatta and welcome to SR!!!!!

Glad ya found us.....please keep posting and reading, the support here is awesome!!! You have taken a huge step in recovery already......stay strong!!!!
Liss

Arura

Welcome Beatta, im SO glad you found SR...! you will find LOTS of help n sopport about your addiction...! look around read some of the excllent post's n pull up a chair...!
Welcome Sweetie... to the road that is Recovery...

Luckyv2

Welcome to SR and we are glad that you are here. In the AA Big Book it talks that potential drinkers especially women can go down quicker than a guy can. So even if you don't think that you are an alcoholic, even though I believe it is hereditary IMO, it still can turn into the real deal, if not stopped in time. Might want to go to a few meetings and just see if you can identify. I will keep you in my thoughts.

Love Vic

CarolD

Welcome!!

Before I could quit for good I had to find out why I drank when I truly wanted to stop.

This was clearly explained in my favorite recovery book..

"Under The influence"
and it has a sequel
"Beyond The Influence"

they are carried by Amazon.

Keep posting..it's great to see you!..

Beatta28

Oh, I truly believe that alcoholism is genetic - I have plenty of it in my family. I think that genetically I am an alcoholic or at least have the great potential to be one. I just don't know that I'd gotten to that point yet. However, I don't ever want to get there which is why I've been trying to stop. What I just have to keep reminding myself is not to fall into the, "It's ok, I can have a couple of drinks" trap because for me it's rarely just a couple.

Arura

Its good that you NOW see the drink for what it is, celabrate that sweetie...! as it is movment in the right direction...!

Glad your Here,...

Keep posting ...!

Beatta28

Here's a question for the sober folk. Do you go out to bars or places where drinking occurs? Most of my friends drink socially and a lot of our social activity revolves around goint out to bars/rock clubs etc. I'm very lucky in that my husband is incredibly supportive of my not drinking and helps very much. However, he's not here at the moment (back in UK due to some visa issues) and I'm feeling very vulnerable. This led to my drinking this past weekend when out with friends. I know that I can't rely of my husband to stop me drinking, that I have to find that within. So, my question is that if you do find yourself around alcohol, how do you deal with it? Do you tell friends straight away that you've stopped drinking or do you not mention it at all?

mygirls_mylife

HI and welcome to SR!!!! I love this place! There are many compassionate and understanding people here. I was predisposed for alcholism and I ignored it and chose to dig and dig and dig. Hopefully you can stop the digging before you get too deep or start to feel that bottom. Stick around! Keep posting! and READ!!!! there are many informative threads to let you know, YOU ARE NOT ALONE!


Edited to add: I have been in 2 bars since i quit and I am about 70 days sober. I had to wait until I had over a month, in fact I had picked up my chip that night I went first. I prayed to God on the way up to the bar and vowed to leave if it was more than I could bear. I kept my chip in front of me the whole time. I did have a good time on both occassions, I think it really depends on you. Most people will say stay away. I truly dont think I can live my life hididng from alcohol. It has to be MY CHOICE!!!

Ngokpa

Many people think they may not be alcoholic because they don't know what it is. The falling-down, skid-row variety is only one variation.

Alcoholism is progressive, and begins when it is still fun. It's good to find out about it. I like a book called "Beyond the Influence," but there are others. But we don't want our compulsion to give us the definition of "worse than me". Many of us wished we would have nipped it in the bud, because things got really ugly because we didn't--but it took what it took to get desperate enough to change.

Welcome!