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One Year & Over Part 92

Old 08-15-2023, 04:50 AM
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Serene, honey, if you can, the best thing to do is record some of this on your phone.
This stuff sounds like abuse to me, and not only does he need to STOP, but you need proof for your legal situation going forward. s

Sending SO much love. ❤️❤️

And good morning, dearest Sass. ❤️

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
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Old 08-15-2023, 09:31 PM
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Thanks all-

All wise, supportive, and yes - if I wasnít in it, I would be laughing at the crazy. (Thx purps!)

Yes Iím making progress with keeping my wits about me. More to go tho - like I said I have to be 10/10. Thx Toots with helping with practical guidance.

I suppose the silver lining is that I felt my brain getting foggy/out of practice with the mundane SAHM task list and now I can feel it sharpening again.

This is a safe place tor me in terms of non access - Iíve sandboxed it from the early days being responsibly tech savvy and have been systematically locking down all accts, etc. That said still being mindful of what I share. Still - this feels safer to me than anyone in our direct social group.

Yes V - I agree (and also note the irony as Iím the one being accused of being the abuser).

I had one toxic relationship in my 20s and I suppose the silver lining is that second time thru that Iím able to not get as caught up in it. More at stake on this one of course.


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Old 08-16-2023, 03:31 AM
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SE, I do remember only too well my big toxic relationship. It lasted about 20 years and was nearly the end of me. He had me believing that I was the crazy one but afterwards I realized I was only nuts to have stayed with him so long. And yes, he had other people believing him - he came across to them as very charming. I was so emotionally beaten down that I nearly let him have custody. The sad part still is how much the whole mess affected my daughter who was around 11 at the time I finally kicked him out; not to mention what he did to my ego and sense of self-worth. Just remember that you are not alone and this is not as uncommon as we think. You are are smart, talented lady and awesome mom and you will get through this. *Hugs*
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Old 08-16-2023, 03:42 AM
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Yes, definitely more hugs. ❤️❤️❤️
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Old 08-16-2023, 06:41 AM
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SE, some good ideas here. Totally agree with locking down all your gadgets. If you record some of the crazy, make sure you back it up to the cloud in case he attempts to break or erase your phone. I have an iPhone and love iCloud backups for all my info. I don't have to think about it at all. I do hope school is going well so far.

Best wishes for a good day all!
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Old 08-16-2023, 01:43 PM
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And our recovery is so important in these cases too….My ex bf used to love saying “You were drunk, you don’t remember!” when accusing me of something (in hindsight = gaslighting)….and the sad part is I couldn’t tell when he was lying because I really was drinking a lot….what an ugly spiral. Good thing we are sober now ((()))

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Old 08-17-2023, 01:30 AM
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Hang in there, BeKind!

Giving the main part of the book another going over. Still finding little things that need to be fixed before it goes to press.

Have a Thunderous Thursday, overs!
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Old 08-17-2023, 01:32 AM
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So inspiring, FBL!
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Old 08-19-2023, 04:06 AM
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Good Afternoon Overs

SE, youíre on the right track. Youíre not crazyÖ.we know. I believe our recovery tools help us in our day to day life. Just as youíre doing. Some great posts here and words of wisdom. Keep going love. Doing the best for you and your adorable children. Sending ❤️ .


FBL pleased the book is just about done!


Have a good weekend my dear friends xxxx





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Old 08-19-2023, 06:20 AM
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Big hugs, SE.

Forgiving myself for getting into, AND overstaying, in a toxic relationship was paramount for my healing.

You CAN do this, even tho it seems overwhelming now.
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Old 08-19-2023, 02:14 PM
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Thank you all.

Im reading and so grateful for your support and words. Canít always post.

Every round I get to better clarity - so we move forward.
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Old 08-19-2023, 03:19 PM
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s ❤️❤️
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Old 08-20-2023, 09:41 PM
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Also thank you all for your honesty and candor. Means more than you know.

FBL - hoping you meet your editing and deal goals this week!

Purps - hope your last week of your job went well. I missed how far you are moving.

Bekind - hope your adulting tasks are getting done.

This week I have 3 afternoons after school off with K. I have a ton to get done but 1-1 time is really important.

Iíve gotten 2 parent calls from school last week and she has had a lot of anxiety and not wanting to go to school. Iíve written emails to all her teachers/care givers to give them insight into her so that they understand her behavior a bit better (and what to do to work with her and what NOT to do), have some special calm down toys in her backpack, etc. And we talk a lot - bedtime, walking to and from school, etc.

basically - if she doesnít feel good she over compensates wirh confidence and doesnít act well (and she has a lot to offer - both good and bad - never dull or quiet). Getting disciplined by someone whom she doesnít know sets her off as it crosses the indignantly threshold for her :/ Hence the calls. But if past predicts future she will settle in and her teachers will love having her in class for what she brings to the classroom.

So anyway - lots of parenting work this week to make sure that Kís environment is what she (and they) need.

Im falling asleep so I bid you goodnight and good morning!!!
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Old 08-21-2023, 03:02 AM
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Wow SE, and on top of everything else….I don’t know you you do it! I hope she settles in shortly. So sorry you have to deal with all of this!
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Old 08-21-2023, 03:09 AM
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Somehow have missed this again..darn foggy brain. Hope all is well.
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Old 08-22-2023, 07:04 PM
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You all seem to be perking along well.

Most of us probably get sober, thinking to improve our lives and it does seem to happen. However, sometimes there is crap coming down the pike and being sober for this is so important; I'm thinking of Alpine's cancer and SE's marriage. Courage to you both and I am so damn grateful for your sobriety.

I've been away from home for a few days. Nice to get out of town and see some different bits of life.
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Old 08-22-2023, 09:03 PM
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Good Morning dear Overs

SE Iíve gotta agree with Purps. I donít know how you do it. I imagine K takes after you because youíre a superwoman! Hope she settles down at school. I wonder what sheíll do work wise when sheís an adult? The world is her oyster.

Alpine, hope the fogginess lifted love.

Bekind, yes life throws challenges at us and being sober helps us deal with them with clarity.

Have a good day my friends xxxx


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Old 08-23-2023, 04:30 AM
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Hmm, can't seem to get things straight in my head. Oh well, hopefully in a few months it will clear out.
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Old 08-23-2023, 04:47 AM
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(((Alpine))) ❤️🧡
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Old 08-23-2023, 05:26 AM
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Youíre going through a LOT, AlpineÖ.try to take it easy on yourself!
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