Hey LHW, I'm sorry that you were feeling this way and I hope it has passed. I remember the restless feeling well, and it has dissipated completely as I approach my 100 day mark. I'm sure that your vision is playing a big role in this feeling, and that should clear up soon, right? Just hang in there and don't drink. Give it a little time. Hugs.

Thanks, everybody. She is fighting for her life. Very rough night last night but she is resting and not in pain far as I can tell. She tried to eat and I got her medication in her. I am just trying to prepare for one of the toughest stretches of my life.

She was my first thought when I woke up, of course, but my second thought was sheer, unvarnished bitterness about what happened at the meeting last night. "If one of your family members were fighting for his or her life, would you say that may be a topic to share at a meeting?" [that's what I was thinking] What kind of sociopath would not think a dying family member has no impact on serenity/sobriety?

Tonight is the safest meeting of the week, and I hope I'll feel better afterwards. What else can I say?

I am praying for your cat, dear SS. :hug: ❤️

Losing a pet is hard, and kiss and grief can be huge stress. Losing a family member like a parent, sibling, or child would be devastating as well, and agree with newly flexing sober muscles would be difficult to get through without a knee jerk thought that drinking would solve the pain of loss.

AA is run by humans, and they can be jerks. I tried Al Anon and was utterly humiliated after two horrible meetings, so I’m not into that program for a tool.

If it’s uncomfortable after a certain period, consider different support tools maybe?


LHW, please post something. Anything. No explanations needed.

Viking, you ok?

Ugh. Correction. “….and THE grief…..”

😬😫

I had to read back to understand. :hug: s

SS ~ people like that are barred from meetings. That is his stuff, not yours. And it is always important to remember that the rooms are filled with sick people trying to get well. xx

Thanks, Free, VC. Just gonna say went to my favorite and safest meeting last night and it helped big time. Not gonna get into particulars, but the individual in question has a reputation so toxic everyone knew whom I was talking about. This is in a town 15 miles away, BTW. There are people with 25-30 years sober that switched meetings because of that individual.

"Take what you need, leave the rest" is probably good advice for everybody in any recovery modality. And I am skeptical of pure orthodoxy in any form. They say that "wine makes a great servant, but a terrible master"--true, but that's also true of AA. Putting anybody, or anything, on a pedestal, is a dangerous expectation, and as AA itself says, an expectation is just a resentment waiting to happen. And if part of the purpose of a HP is understanding that HP is not you, it is axiomatic that it's not any other fallible human being, either.

Great opportunity to reiterate, and be grateful for, SR is a 24/7/365 safe and welcome environment. I never hesitate to come here or share, and that is indeed unique.

Sure, but take what you need and leave the rest is about the program, not the disruptors.

I am not sure why the group conscience is not acting in the best interests of the group regarding that member. Perhaps they are. Possibly someone has planned to have a conversation with him next time he turns up. And I worry about him. He is most likely in a very bad place.

Sorry for being MIA and thanks for the concern. Issues with the eye once I stopped the drops . Trying to just rest it and not do PC work or read or watch TV so basically I am sitting around being miserable. Hoping to get in to see doc tomorrow.

(((LHW))) ❤️

I hope the doc can help tomorrow. xx

SS all I can do is reiterate Suze by saying don't let someone else run, control or disrupt your recovery or your peace of mind
Its too important to get bogged down in personalities.

Best wishes LHW - I hope the Dr can and will be of help :)

D

Our class is getting quiet. It’s been like NEVER that I’d have to go past page four on my NEW POSTS search to find our class thread.

Checking in, the days are blurring into weeks.

Hope all are well.

🤓❤️

Thanks, Dee. I know it's true. The tricky part is figuring out what's right for me. Here we discuss and share all kinds of modalities and everyone's pretty open-minded. I'll just say that's not always the case elsewhere. "If you want what we have, do what we did." Well, merely not drinking is not what I want, and mimicking in lockstep people doing that makes no sense to me.

What's really on my mind, and has been since that awful Monday, has been of course Duchess. I would say she is stable but still serious. The medical stuff is too long and complicated for here, but the main concern is for anemia, source of which is still un-ID'ed. One vet did not even discuss a blood transfusion; another made it sound like a no-brainer. For now I've done all I can do.

Whatever happens, I just thank God I'm all there.

Continued best wishes for Duchess SS.

D

Hey all, today is officially the 2nd trimester! We’ve never made it this far before so it’s exciting. I’ve been feeling pretty good and started to go to a prenatal yoga class with a nice group of women. It’s a 6 week course and a nice little community. I’ve been having very vivid dreams mostly of things I shouldn’t be doing while pregnant like drinking or last night I dreamt I ate an uncooked piece of chicken. I wake up having to comfort myself that it was just a dream. They just seem so real and I wake up all panicked.

SS, I’m sorry to hear of your Duchess not doing well. I hope she gets better soon. Also, the person in AA sounds very difficult. I know people are really struggling and are trying to get help but geez. I guess all you can really do is go to a different meeting and try to remember it’s all on that person.

I really liked AA when I first got sober but then I found Recovery Dharma and that just fit me a lot better. I usually go to one meeting a week and there’s a book that’s always relevant for whatever I’m struggling with. I was just talking lto my therapist about how much I like the recovery message. It’s Buddhist based but it’s also not solely focused on alcohol. It’s focused on all harmful substances and behaviors. Many of the people in the meetings are recovering from alcohol but there’s a bunch of other stuff people are recovering from too like eating disorders and negative thought patterns. We celebrate milestones and anniversaries too but it’s nice to not focus so much on alcohol and focus on the whole person.

LHW, I hope you feel better soon. You’ve had a lot to deal with the last few months. I know when I don’t feel well it really wears me down. Sending hugs your way ❤️

Hey gang.

Went to the eye doctor this morning — I’m having some very rare post op issues. I can’t really be looking at emails, computers etc. for the next couple days. Nothing serious but I will be MIA for the next few days. Add to that that we have just learned both Mr. LHW and I happened to be again very closely exposed to Covid last couple days so hoping to fend that one off.

I’ll be back in touch when able….

I will be back in touch in a few days.

Geez. What else can go wrong?

Gosh, love, that is not good, but I have faith you will be OK. Rest and recover. :hug: ❤️

Second trimester, yay!!! I am thrilled for you and Mr. Bodhi!!! ❤️❤️

((((LHW)))) Hang in there, it will get better. Sorry you’re having a tough time.

Bodhi, I’m so happy for you!

SS, wishing the best for Duchess. Keeping her comfortable is being her hero.

Free, I would like an “All I Got Was This T-Shirt” t-shirt.

CP, You will have to celebrate your 100 with a slice! And, cups do travel.

I am on the road again this weekend, last minute trip to NY. I’ll be around though and will catch up more, I miss you guys. It’s a good but busy week.

Hugs to all.

Ditto what Viking said ❤️🤓

Except heading for Jordan and my 9th Covid test.

Serengeti AMAZING.🐃🦜🌞🦩🐇🐢🐊🦓🦛🌴🌾🐵🐒🦇🧥🐆🦒🐘