Dee74

I’m sorry about your ring Stubbs, and your husbands mood, Worried.

Leshar let’s have no talk of dishonour….I’m sure your husband loved you - he’d fully support you beating this problem once and for all and finding peace and happiness again.


D

Leshar

Hi guys,
Stubbs, thanks so much for what you said, and you too, of course, Dee. My addiction has controlled me for far too long. I will try not to dwell on the past. I'm still here and trying. I feel absolutely awful physically. Stiff, sore neck and dizzy, sort of spacey at times. I don't think it's all down to the gym session yesterday. I was recently started on an add on medication to my existing anti-depressant, and I really think it must be the culprit. I just don't feel right. I have increased respiratory rate, even at rest, and a bad headache. I did a rapid covid test and thankfully it was negative. I've had night sweats too for the last while. At least the latter isn't due to alcohol. I will email my doctor. Today was just the worst. And new noisy neighbours haven't helped, but I've whined enough today!

Stubbs, I'm sorry you're not feeling the best still. It's good that you and your husband have cleared the air though. I really hope you are able to travel together. I had some wonderful holidays with my husband and I cherish the happy memories of these.

venuscat

I would email and call as well, dear Leshar. That sounds like something your doctor would want to know. I really hope you feel better love. s ❤️

Dee74

I'm glad you're consulting your doctor Leshar

D

Worried14

Morning everyone
Thankyou so much for your support.
Stubbs and Alpine, it's good to know I'm not alone, sometimes I feel like the worst person in the world, I know there are alot of people like me going through similar things but it just still feels so lonely.
Hi Leshar, I've also watched Joan McDonald on Youtube and yes she is amazing, it's good to see what can be done it you put your mind to it, maybe when my grandchildren are older...
You sound like you've over done things, I think you've got to start slow especially as we get older - we can do ourselves an injury more easily, there might be a weakness that we're not even aware of.

I have to go now, hubby wants me to help him with something, i'll finish later.......

Stubbs16

Hey everyone. Yesterday was a day of rest and I do believe it's helped a bit. Still far from feeling 💯 % but think I'm on the mend. But oh my goodness I'm stiff as a board from lounging too much! Can't win sometimes but I needed that rest.

Leshar Im glad my words helped you a bit. I'm not good with them but I felt your pain. I'm sure Mr Leshar is darn proud of you. Sorry you are still feeling bad physically. A doc visit/ call sounds in order. Especially since you have started the new med. And I'm proud of you for all you have endured. All that was no walk in the park my friend.

The weather here 2day is beautiful! Soon Im heading out to take the dogs a walk at the park. Then I have a few errands to run today. Getting ready for the week ahead. Inside Im feeling terrified about Thursday but putting on a brave face for the Mr. It brings back all the fear from the first scope/ surgery when he was diagnosed. I actually had a panic attack in the waiting room. Mr. will be very sick afterwards. The anesthesia always makes him vomit 🤢

Good to see you this morning worried. Hope you have a great day. Same to all my class. Make it count!

Alpine

Worried, you are defiantly not alone, but I do understand where he is coming from
Stubbs, I hope you are feeling better and that Mr. Stubbs is warming up
Leshar, that's rough, but I am sure he would be very proud of you. I am sure he was just very concerned for your well fair.
I most likely will stop in later on, but then starting tomorrow I will be gone for a few days on a canoe camping trip. It is supposed to rain a fair amount so we will see. how that goes.

Alpine

Anyone reading any good books? Looking for recommendations for a book I can download for when I go camping. Thanks in advance.

Leshar

Hi friends,
Just a quick check in. I'm meeting with my niece and her partner today. They are briefly here visiting his family who live here.
Showering isn't easy, I can hardly lift my arms over my head!
Worried, I know that lonely feeling but you are definitely not alone, my friend. It's good to know that we can go through the same feelings and support one another.
Alpine, your trip sounds exciting! My husband and I loved canoeing. I do miss it. I hope the rain holds

off for you.
Hi Stubbs, hope you feel better as the day goes on!

Worried14

Thanks Leshar and everyone for all you support . It's great to be able to come here.

Wow, Leshar, you gave away 500 bottles of wine !? Well done ! If I had 600 bottles of wine I'd find it very difficult to give any away . I used to think it would be great to have a cellar with loads of wine. I could put a bed down there and hide away for a while. Fortunately we don't have a cellar and if I buy wine I drink it, so I can't collect it. Though I do remember having a bottle that I kept for several months but that was a few years ago, now I'd get rid of the temptation.

lol, that sounds soooo funny venus. We do put it in bags first ! I don't know how it's done where you are but it's quite usual to take household rubbish to the dump round here - sometimes because there's too much for the bin or sometimes because the bin lorry has been missed. It can get a bit smelly on the way there but if I open all the windows on the way back it airs it out and it's ok

Stubbs, I was just thinking, perhaps it would be an idea to accept a new ring from Mr Stubbs. You said in some ways his illness has brought you closer together, maybe a new ring can represent new beginnings?


When I got married to Mr W over 20 years ago he new I liked to drink and said he didn't mind. But of course I've gradually got worse and also he's getting old. I think he feels safe when there is someone around. Luckily he's always been quite a healthy person apart from a bit of bursitis in his hip, but even healthy people get old and slow down. He's always worried about his health - he used to have panic attacks and was a very anxious person. He likes me to go shopping with him incase he has a stroke or something, and I think he likes me around in the house for the same reason. So I really do need to be compos mentis.

Well, it's been another lovely day weather wise.

Stay strong for Thursday Stubbs

Enjoy your camping trip Alpine, sorry I can't recommend any books, I don't know what you like to read. At the moment, to relax, I'm reading about ufo sightings and generally strange sightings which is written by a man that lives not so far away and he's talking about sightings that are just a bit further south from me, so I find it interesting but I don't suppose you would lol

Leshar, hope you enjoy your day with your niece. Hope you've emailed your doctor too!

And stay safe everybody

Stubbs16

My beautiful day has turned ugly and rainy- in my heart. Hubs and I decided to walk dogs together this am. Things were going OK then an event happened on the highway with him cutting off 4 people in front of us. I screamed thinking we were going to wreck or rear end somebody. Man he really gave me a tongue lashing and it turned into a full blown argument. I seriously can't take this bull anymore. I appreciate he's sick and stressed and in horrible pain.Has been since February. That doesn't give him the ticket to treat me badly though. I can't handle this anymore. 😭 It's been like walking on eggshells since February and I've had enough. Going to head out of the house and be away for a few hours today. Just need to be alone for awhile. Had to get this all out. Thanks for listening class.

venuscat

I imagine that he likes you around the house for lots of reasons love, including the fact that he loves you.

Hope you are all having a good Sunday. s ❤️

venuscat

Oh Stubbs, I am really really glad you are OK. Those things scare the stuffing out of me, and I would have screamed as well, and also had the same fight. Well, sort of....Nick doesn't yell at me, but I would have made things bad all by myself.

I am glad you are taking some time to chill. ❤️

Stubbs16

Was gone for many hours today. First I went to the grocery to get some food for the week. That depressed me so bad. Everytime I go prices just go up and up! The really poor and old are suffering so in this horrible economy. It's just not ok!
My 87 year old Mom eats bread and gravy or cheap stuff alot. I took her some food but it's insanity out there. Limits on alot of stuff again. Food and gas shortages coming this winter. Like it hasn't been hard enuff! I don't see any relief in sight. The greeter at one store had to be in his late 70's I would imagine. Standing ,barely using a cane. Alot of retired people now have to return to work again . It's pathetic. I'm not a proud American anymore. Ashamed actually. This country has gone to hell Quickly. Enuff said.

Watched the ducks and animals at the park. They are so special. God did good on that creation. Animals are not mean. Just mostly kill for food or by instinct. Or territorial rights. Wish us humans could learn from that.

I tried to talk to hubs about how I understand all his fear and pain. He doesn't want to talk so I let it go for now. It's been a bad day. He grilled us some food and I made a side. I apologized for screaming. It wasn't at him it was the highway situation. Now he's just looking at stuff to pick on me about! So I'm being invisible 2nite.

I'm seriously considering taking some time off work to regroup. I need the money but sometimes you just have to make sacrifices.

I met the day with optimism and good intentions. Sad to report it didn't turn out that way. Tomorrow maybe. Thanks class

Alpine

Stubbs, I think you should take some time off for yourself. You have to be recharged and take care of yourself first before you can take care of or help anyone else. What's the saying...Put your oxygen mask on first.
I am sorry you had a rough day, it has to be so hard in so many ways. I wish you peace and I hope you and Mr. Stubbs can enjoy time together. big hug to you

Dee74

Just a reminder that politics is off topic - thanks guys

D

Worried14

Hello class
Hope You've had a good nights sleep Stubbs, and are feeling a bit better you must have had an awful shock.
The other week Mr W was trying to park the car outside a post office and he went on to the pavement while manoeuvring. Just as he was doing that a couple with one pushing the other in a wheelchair came past and were walking right on the edge of the path. They got a shock and shouted at us. Mr W was very angry with them and blamed them for walking on the edge of the path where people were parking - he was in the car so the people didn't know he was angry, they just carried on walking. Anyway, he blamed them for being stupid and went on about it for a while. Of course it was his fault for going on the path so I just kept quiet (since I didn't get a sudden shock I was able to keep calm). He'd have been very upset and angry if I'd said anything and I suppose it's because he knew deep down it was his fault. No one was hurt anyway.

I'm having a quiet day here. Was going to pick the grandchildren up from school but got a message to say there's no need today. So I've put some washing on, and I'm trying to get up the motivation to get some other jobs done before I fall asleep from inertia. I'll listen to something interesting on Youtube while I do some jobs I think.

Tried some micro macrame - ie making a bracelet - last night. Been meaning to for a while and finally got around to it. Took me hours to just do about 2cm of it ! Oh well, hopefully I'll get better with practice.

Ah well, I'll go and get some jobs done, there's always loads that needs doing

Bye for now

Leshar

Hi friends,
Stubbs, I'm so sorry that things transpired the way they did. I completely understand your shock/anxiety and reacting the way you did in that driving situation. I find driving, especially highway driving, extremely stressful in the last two years I'm not exactly sure why. I used to be a confident driver, but not any more. It was a good thing for you to spend some time alone and regroup. It must be so difficult for you both, especially with your husband's tests coming up this week. Hugs to you.

I had a bad day yesterday. I felt out of breath and so weak. I had a visit with my niece. Her partner wasn't able to come. I wasn't in the best form. I'm feeling very low and unmotivated today, but a little less weak. I'm struggling with noisy new neighbours and don't want to go outside because of the noise and smell of cigarette smoke. I'm feeling trapped and adrift. I can't seem to motivate myself to do anything today. I guess I'm feeling angry and I don't know how to channel that in a healthier way. Just generally feeling very low.

venuscat

No matter what Leshar, you push yourself every day, and you do so well. So maybe a day off, just for you will be nice. I hope the noise and smoke is not all of the time; I would complain about that. s xx

Leshar

Thanks, Suze. I'm afraid that I am beside myself. I just went out to water my plants, and the cigarette smoke and loud chat from neighbours and their friends, and country music was too much. I just broke down crying and feel so hopeless. I had been lucky for a long time with quiet neighbours. I don't feel at risk of drinking over the situation, so I suppose that's something. I feel very alone and helpless. I'm going to go out now for a while, just to get away. Thanks for your support.