Class of May 2020 part 18
Free.
Join Date: Apr 2020
Location: Saskatchewan.
Posts: 2,972
Wife and I are starting to talk about separating. We no longer get along.
Part of it is I’ve stopped tolerating her terse, quick to anger, barking nature. She finds that tough, I think.
I don’t deserve to be barked at and yelled at. In fact I was so hurt by a recent outburst I considered talking to a police member, hoping he/she would talk with my wife about verbal abuse.
My wife gets so cold and dismissive when she’s upset.
She brought up, today, a thing I did while drinking (racy message to her sis) (not good of me) I think she won’t be willing to forgive that.. I think she sees it as a mountain, when, really, I’m willing to talk to the sis and apologize. I think sis has a big enough nature to be open to an apology. I think my wife sees this as world-ending.
This was over 6 months ago.
Anyway…………
Part of it is I’ve stopped tolerating her terse, quick to anger, barking nature. She finds that tough, I think.
I don’t deserve to be barked at and yelled at. In fact I was so hurt by a recent outburst I considered talking to a police member, hoping he/she would talk with my wife about verbal abuse.
My wife gets so cold and dismissive when she’s upset.
She brought up, today, a thing I did while drinking (racy message to her sis) (not good of me) I think she won’t be willing to forgive that.. I think she sees it as a mountain, when, really, I’m willing to talk to the sis and apologize. I think sis has a big enough nature to be open to an apology. I think my wife sees this as world-ending.
This was over 6 months ago.
Anyway…………
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Western New York
Posts: 2,446
Sorry things are rough going TC. Gettimg sober revealed a lot of messes to me. Many were mine that I could clean up, but I also realized not everything was my fault. Learning where to set a boundary of what i won't tolerate and where to be to be tolerant/understanding is hard and more of a decision than a rule. My wife and I got through some rough spots that were almost the end but it wasnt a sure thing. Wishing you the best, maybe just some time and patience is whats needed
Took off from work yesterday to get some yard work done. Hopefully finishing up today and going for another hike tomorrow. Its cool out but thats welcome
Took off from work yesterday to get some yard work done. Hopefully finishing up today and going for another hike tomorrow. Its cool out but thats welcome
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 8,762
I’m sorry things are tough at home for you TC. Relationships can be so challenging. Maybe it’s worth talking to a counsellor to help get some clarity about whether you want to keep trying or whether it’s time to call it a day? It’s a tough situation alright. Sending you my support across the globe, for what it’s worth 
Free.
Join Date: Apr 2020
Location: Saskatchewan.
Posts: 2,972
Thanks Willow.
The support and understanding of everyone here is valuable and important.
We’ve hashed a couple of things out. Had a bit of a breakthrough.
We are both so tired of it all. (the arguing). Having a bit of an emotional hangover today.
Don’t know what tomorrow brings. Will have to go day by day for a while.
I think we both have imagined that living alone would be more peaceful than recent. I’m not sure if we want to go there yet. We’ll see.
Need a new set of tools.
The support and understanding of everyone here is valuable and important.
We’ve hashed a couple of things out. Had a bit of a breakthrough.
We are both so tired of it all. (the arguing). Having a bit of an emotional hangover today.
Don’t know what tomorrow brings. Will have to go day by day for a while.
I think we both have imagined that living alone would be more peaceful than recent. I’m not sure if we want to go there yet. We’ll see.
Need a new set of tools.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Western New York
Posts: 2,446
Morning all! I got a ton of weeding done this weekend and we went for another hike yesterday. No birding, but there was a 20ft waterfall which was pretty cool. (It was muddy as heck on the trail though) I was on the wrong side to get a good photo
TC - I know how those conversations can be. Hopefully you are feeling better today and maybe it will be a catalyst for some positive changes
TC - I know how those conversations can be. Hopefully you are feeling better today and maybe it will be a catalyst for some positive changes
Free.
Join Date: Apr 2020
Location: Saskatchewan.
Posts: 2,972
Hope you enjoyed the hike nmd.
Yeah, having an argument is like taking a sluggish car out on the highway and “blowing out the pipes”, so to speak. Seems that we have to spew some of the yuck that’s been clogging things up, in order to get running more smoothly. (Still feeling a bit drained over it though)
On the subject of cars, I’m talking (messaging) with a friend of family about a car I last saw running when I was probably 11 years old. It is a green, fifties, dodge regent. A wonderful, white-haired couple drove it 40+ years ago. As they got older, it was just driven into an old shop and parked. Last I saw it, about 18 years ago, the rotted roof of the old shop has given way. A rafter is laying on top of the car, the keys were just there in the ignition. There is an old tractor parked next to it as well. The car and the tractor are holding up what is left of the roof.
I’ve made an offer on the car. The owner is busy seeding, but will get back to me, I’m told.
I should be so lucky. They might decide to keep it, so, fingers crossed.
Hope you all are safe, warm, and content.
Yeah, having an argument is like taking a sluggish car out on the highway and “blowing out the pipes”, so to speak. Seems that we have to spew some of the yuck that’s been clogging things up, in order to get running more smoothly. (Still feeling a bit drained over it though)
On the subject of cars, I’m talking (messaging) with a friend of family about a car I last saw running when I was probably 11 years old. It is a green, fifties, dodge regent. A wonderful, white-haired couple drove it 40+ years ago. As they got older, it was just driven into an old shop and parked. Last I saw it, about 18 years ago, the rotted roof of the old shop has given way. A rafter is laying on top of the car, the keys were just there in the ignition. There is an old tractor parked next to it as well. The car and the tractor are holding up what is left of the roof.
I’ve made an offer on the car. The owner is busy seeding, but will get back to me, I’m told.
I should be so lucky. They might decide to keep it, so, fingers crossed.
Hope you all are safe, warm, and content.
Free.
Join Date: Apr 2020
Location: Saskatchewan.
Posts: 2,972
Nice rainy morning here.
I’ll be at a work retreat for the remainder of the week. We will be at a camp in the Northern Boreal forest at the north end of a large lake. I hope to get some canoeing 🛶 in on my off time.
I’m told there is decent wifi out there.
Be well friends.
I’ll be at a work retreat for the remainder of the week. We will be at a camp in the Northern Boreal forest at the north end of a large lake. I hope to get some canoeing 🛶 in on my off time.
I’m told there is decent wifi out there.
Be well friends.
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 8,762
nmd I love waterfalls, they’re beautiful, and have such great energy about them.
I hope the work retreat goes well TC
It sounds like a lovely spot for a retreat.
Good luck with the car! My partner is thinking about restoring an old car, an old valiant charger. I’m not sure if he’s going ahead with it yet.
We’re getting someone in to look at the computer and the internet situation here. Hopefully we’ll be able to get the computer fixed, and get something worked out to boost phone signal and give us wifi…. Fingers crossed.
I hope the work retreat goes well TC
It sounds like a lovely spot for a retreat.Good luck with the car! My partner is thinking about restoring an old car, an old valiant charger. I’m not sure if he’s going ahead with it yet.
We’re getting someone in to look at the computer and the internet situation here. Hopefully we’ll be able to get the computer fixed, and get something worked out to boost phone signal and give us wifi…. Fingers crossed.
Free.
Join Date: Apr 2020
Location: Saskatchewan.
Posts: 2,972
Hope your signal gets boosted up Willow.
Yeah, I’m a sucker for the old cars. You can’t beat the performance and comfort of the newer cars though.
I’m at home this evening. Retreat starts tomorrow for 3 days.
Cheers.
Yeah, I’m a sucker for the old cars. You can’t beat the performance and comfort of the newer cars though.
I’m at home this evening. Retreat starts tomorrow for 3 days.
Cheers.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Western New York
Posts: 2,446
sounds like a great place for a retreat TC, maybe you'll see some moose. Canoeing is great too
Hope you get the internet situation sorted out Willow
It's been wicked hot here (well, it hit the 90s), but cooling off today. Back down in the high 70s F. The kids are officially finished with school and their high school graduation is coming up quick! So much to do
Hope you get the internet situation sorted out Willow
It's been wicked hot here (well, it hit the 90s), but cooling off today. Back down in the high 70s F. The kids are officially finished with school and their high school graduation is coming up quick! So much to do
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,493
I have the air con running all week without a break...this is the hottest week of weather I have ever known, and that includes 40+ in Melbourne.
I moved here (in part) to escape the heat....hmm.
I moved here (in part) to escape the heat....hmm.
Free.
Join Date: Apr 2020
Location: Saskatchewan.
Posts: 2,972
It was a lovely sunny 19C to 23C out there. Haha…arctic.
Was so nice to see the lake. Went with a couple of older co-workers for a drive around the various resorts. Nice place to spend time.
Didn’t see any moose, but did see several tracks of a young moose right in the area.
I picked up the scent of a bear the one evening. No real surprise, the garbage receptacles are all bear-proof in the area. We had a rain/sun mix. Decent weather. Spent some time at the campfire.
Going for a nap.
Have a good thing folks!
Was so nice to see the lake. Went with a couple of older co-workers for a drive around the various resorts. Nice place to spend time.
Didn’t see any moose, but did see several tracks of a young moose right in the area.
I picked up the scent of a bear the one evening. No real surprise, the garbage receptacles are all bear-proof in the area. We had a rain/sun mix. Decent weather. Spent some time at the campfire.
Going for a nap.
Have a good thing folks!
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
