Class of July 2021 Support Thread Part One
Member
Join Date: Jun 2021
Location: Florida
Posts: 2,077
Good morning,
I've realized that every relapse I've had there was a lead up to it and I think it's safe to say that this is a pretty universal observation for alcoholics in general. One of the best tools is to keep a journal so you can look back and see what was going on in your mind in the days preceding the relapse. I found that I had a definite pattern going on there, so this gives me the ability to nip it in the bud before it turns into action, which just restarts the whole pattern of,,,get s*** faced, self flagellate, feel better, repeat......
It takes time, effort and abstinence. You have to be patient and stick to your plan. And yes, sometimes you're going to exhaust every tool you have and it will boil down to sheer determination and grit. It's a daily maintenance it's always one day at a time....hang in there everybody
You can do it
I've realized that every relapse I've had there was a lead up to it and I think it's safe to say that this is a pretty universal observation for alcoholics in general. One of the best tools is to keep a journal so you can look back and see what was going on in your mind in the days preceding the relapse. I found that I had a definite pattern going on there, so this gives me the ability to nip it in the bud before it turns into action, which just restarts the whole pattern of,,,get s*** faced, self flagellate, feel better, repeat......
It takes time, effort and abstinence. You have to be patient and stick to your plan. And yes, sometimes you're going to exhaust every tool you have and it will boil down to sheer determination and grit. It's a daily maintenance it's always one day at a time....hang in there everybody
You can do it
Member
Join Date: Jun 2021
Location: Florida
Posts: 2,077
Also,
Relapse with the ever present stupid idea that this time you'll moderate yourself, it'll be different this time is like:
Going in the fridge in the morning realizing the milk is rotten and putting back in the fridge thinking maybe it will be fresh tomorrow...
Relapse with the ever present stupid idea that this time you'll moderate yourself, it'll be different this time is like:
Going in the fridge in the morning realizing the milk is rotten and putting back in the fridge thinking maybe it will be fresh tomorrow...
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,496
Originally Posted by Be123 
Hi everyone. I'm back to this board having started drinking again about three months ago. Glad to join the july group if you'll have me?
Today I'm going to do some cleaning of the house this morning, then take both kids to town for some clothes shopping and buy them lunch. Then chill this evening. I have my kids live with me Sun-Weds and have been sober these days throughout, it's a good positive habit. But unfortunately wednesdays-saturday are increasingly beginning to look like a bender each week
Today I'm going to do some cleaning of the house this morning, then take both kids to town for some clothes shopping and buy them lunch. Then chill this evening. I have my kids live with me Sun-Weds and have been sober these days throughout, it's a good positive habit. But unfortunately wednesdays-saturday are increasingly beginning to look like a bender each week
s ❤️Welcome back!!! And to all of you who are back or beginning your journey: so much love and onward together.
s ❤️
Member
Join Date: Feb 2017
Location: Georgia, USA
Posts: 2,229
Hello all. Day 4 here.
I've thought about the lead-up to my relapse, too. A week or so ago, when I had put a few days together sober, I think I just got exhausted and stressed. Back in January, when the drinking began (after about a 9 month sober period), I think it was stress, too. I was moving out of my house and into an apartment with my grown son who has some serious obstacles. So, I have to find a better way to deal with stress.
Everything I'm reading about recovery, no matter what program it's from, has a lot of the same advice. One of the points is always, 'find a group of sober people recovering and get in the middle of it'. We have that here, and I am so grateful for it!
I also want a face to face group. That's a little harder with Covid still hanging on, but I think it can be done.
Just some early morning thoughts.
I hope everyone has a wonderful day and stays sober!
I've thought about the lead-up to my relapse, too. A week or so ago, when I had put a few days together sober, I think I just got exhausted and stressed. Back in January, when the drinking began (after about a 9 month sober period), I think it was stress, too. I was moving out of my house and into an apartment with my grown son who has some serious obstacles. So, I have to find a better way to deal with stress.
Everything I'm reading about recovery, no matter what program it's from, has a lot of the same advice. One of the points is always, 'find a group of sober people recovering and get in the middle of it'. We have that here, and I am so grateful for it!
I also want a face to face group. That's a little harder with Covid still hanging on, but I think it can be done.
Just some early morning thoughts.
I hope everyone has a wonderful day and stays sober!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2020
Posts: 1,189
Originally Posted by Dee74
I'm not sure what started you drinking again. apart from the new job BTG so I can't give a really detailed reply but online meetings, and counselling sound like a good start.
If the new job is stressful - unload yourself here - it's better than drinking
D
If the new job is stressful - unload yourself here - it's better than drinking
D
Happy 4th of July.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Location: UK
Posts: 208
On to day 4 now....feeling good. Surprising and my positivity has not been this good for a long time.
No thoughts of drinking. Glad to be sober and having had a good sober weekend.
Hope everyone else in the July class are doing good.
No thoughts of drinking. Glad to be sober and having had a good sober weekend.
Hope everyone else in the July class are doing good.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2021
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 22
Two weeks.
I thought I would feel a bigger sense of accomplishment but, I just don't. All I've wanted to do on this holiday is drink and feel my version of "normal" again. 😑
Decided to take my dad to the boardwalk for a walk & lunch. I thought of the times we'd done that before... sat at the bar & ordered clams & beer. Then I'd switch to wine. And go to the restroom to drink from the bottle in my handbag to get trashed more quickly. Then he'd have to drive home. Silently, because he was angry. Rightfully so.
That memory, & other's, along with an urge the size of Texas, prompted me to suggest eating downtown instead of the beach area. We went to a terrific Asian/Fusion taco place that doesn't serve & isn't BYOB. I actually enjoyed myself for a little bit & I liked my 1st non alcoholic "cocktail" made with ice, watermelon puree & lime. All that was missing was the me of two weeks ago, handing the keys to dad. 😔
Well, I guess I have accomplished something. I caught a small glimpse of what life can be like if I keep remembering everything alcohol stole from me. Like a nice lunch with my dad.
Hope everyone is being strong today & enjoying time with people you love.
I thought I would feel a bigger sense of accomplishment but, I just don't. All I've wanted to do on this holiday is drink and feel my version of "normal" again. 😑
Decided to take my dad to the boardwalk for a walk & lunch. I thought of the times we'd done that before... sat at the bar & ordered clams & beer. Then I'd switch to wine. And go to the restroom to drink from the bottle in my handbag to get trashed more quickly. Then he'd have to drive home. Silently, because he was angry. Rightfully so.
That memory, & other's, along with an urge the size of Texas, prompted me to suggest eating downtown instead of the beach area. We went to a terrific Asian/Fusion taco place that doesn't serve & isn't BYOB. I actually enjoyed myself for a little bit & I liked my 1st non alcoholic "cocktail" made with ice, watermelon puree & lime. All that was missing was the me of two weeks ago, handing the keys to dad. 😔
Well, I guess I have accomplished something. I caught a small glimpse of what life can be like if I keep remembering everything alcohol stole from me. Like a nice lunch with my dad.
Hope everyone is being strong today & enjoying time with people you love.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2021
Location: Florida
Posts: 2,077
Don't cave to the cravings just think about where it will take you if you did, and keep fresh in your mind a bad hangover or horrible withdrawals. Eating and drinking something helps or chew some gum, suck on a hard candy, watch a movie and relax....
Member
Join Date: Dec 2020
Posts: 2,601
Morning all
Congrats on getting through and changing eating places and habits Janine and many congrats on 2 weeks
BTG-hope you got past the cravings ok. Holidays can be so difficult for me too.
So changed my pillows, sleeping position etc etc but again woke with a bad headache. Just hoping it eases. will check in later.
Day 30.
RAL
Congrats on getting through and changing eating places and habits Janine and many congrats on 2 weeks
BTG-hope you got past the cravings ok. Holidays can be so difficult for me too.
So changed my pillows, sleeping position etc etc but again woke with a bad headache. Just hoping it eases. will check in later.
Day 30.
RAL
Member
Join Date: Dec 2020
Posts: 2,601
Thanks Dee.
For me, month 2 is harder in some ways. Well it must be as I have not successfully got past it in years. Something happens that makes me pick up again. Do I feel better, think I'm ok, think just 1 or 2 will be ok,just get fed up. Maybe a combination of all. I am looking at the benefits of sobriety rather than thinking I'm missing out by not drinking. but that still doesn't stop me from idolising a glass of wine or 2 in a cocktail bar on holiday or lying by the pool. More work needed. Or as someone once told me I don't necessarily have to work harder, just work smarter.
For me, month 2 is harder in some ways. Well it must be as I have not successfully got past it in years. Something happens that makes me pick up again. Do I feel better, think I'm ok, think just 1 or 2 will be ok,just get fed up. Maybe a combination of all. I am looking at the benefits of sobriety rather than thinking I'm missing out by not drinking. but that still doesn't stop me from idolising a glass of wine or 2 in a cocktail bar on holiday or lying by the pool. More work needed. Or as someone once told me I don't necessarily have to work harder, just work smarter.
Say cheese!
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Scotland
Posts: 3,379
morning x
good job RAL on 30 days x
good job also to those who are getting in there AF days x
im on day 4 and im feeling much better than i did couple of days ago, so thats a good thing. Hub went back to work today, so im home alone and unsure what i am going to do. i have already started my journal this morn, will have to finish it this evening. guess i could hoover which would only take me 5 mins lol. its also grey outside so wont again be able to do anything with the garden. I am back to work on thur, what a thought that will be, least it will keep me bz for couple of days.
well i will leave it there for now, see what exciting stuff happens today, weird thing is i havent heard from my alcohol councillor or daughter, guess they are bz. have good monday all and will check back in later to see how u lovely people are x
good job RAL on 30 days x
good job also to those who are getting in there AF days x
im on day 4 and im feeling much better than i did couple of days ago, so thats a good thing. Hub went back to work today, so im home alone and unsure what i am going to do. i have already started my journal this morn, will have to finish it this evening. guess i could hoover which would only take me 5 mins lol. its also grey outside so wont again be able to do anything with the garden. I am back to work on thur, what a thought that will be, least it will keep me bz for couple of days.
well i will leave it there for now, see what exciting stuff happens today, weird thing is i havent heard from my alcohol councillor or daughter, guess they are bz. have good monday all and will check back in later to see how u lovely people are x
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