TiredCarpenter

Doing ok. Thanks for the kind words.

Wishing you peace,warmth, and comfort.

Dee74

back at you TC.
Day One?

D

venuscat

Goodnight dear Dee and good very earIy morning everyone eIse. Thinking of you dear TC. s ❤️

venuscat

Ohhhhh, just found out what a popover tin/pan is Hope
And now I know why so many peopIe make these giant yorkshire puddings....they use that pan.
I must organise a caII with my sister....I need a few recipes. xx

Willow00

Hope I have a friend like that, it’s very difficult to spend time with her when I’m not drinking. She doesn’t like it. She drinks a lot. Every day. As much as she can. She will tolerate me having a coffee or a soft drink, but she doesn’t like it. A few times I have given in and drank wine. It’s very difficult for me to see her and stay sober

TC I’m thinking of you too. I’ve been struggling mightily lately, especially having been to see my old friend/drinking buddy and it’s a real slippery slope. The AV gets it’s claws in and doesn’t want to let go, but we have to shake it off.
I haven’t been posting much and I have been visiting my friend recently because she’s been going through a lot of rough stuff, with her husband amongst other things. I gave in and had drinks with her a couple of times, last week and the weekend and again this week.

Last night I vowed that I am barred from visiting her again. She lives not far away from me on my route home, so I am going to drive a different way home from now on. I have known her for more than 20 years and she’s a good friend, and I want to be there for her, but it’s just too hard to be sober around her. I do ok for a while but then I don’t
I don’t want to lose her friendship but I really need to stay sober. So today I am starting again. I have some snacks to munch on my way home and I’m coming straight home from work. She needs to work out her own life, and I can’t keep allowing myself to get caught up with her alcohol infused problems

venuscat

WeII I think I wouId teII her WiIIow....that you want to be there for her however you can, but you can't be around the wine.
And honestIy, I am worried for her....drinking as much as she can every day isn't going to end weII.

Proud of you honey....you need to put YOU first....100%.
And I am so gIad that you are. s ❤️

TiredCarpenter

Willow: strive for sobriety at all cost. Being sober is soooooooo much freer and more pleasant than the alternative.

I don’t know if I have any fight in me left.
If we subscribe to this ‘ greater being’ or “God” idea; then God created me to only feel ‘normal’ when drunk.
What sort of an “A” hole does that?

I think I’ll take my lot in life. You’ll find me in a cardboard box in an alley somewhere.. This seems to be what “God” intended.

peace, love, and warmth to you all.

Willow00

Thanks Suze I’m worried for her too. She’s a heavy drinker and everything she does is focused on drinking. I know that story, I don’t want to be part of that story anymore. She’s having relationship issues and often can’t remember the arguments that she and her husband have. She’s not interested in stopping drinking, because I have broached it with her, and she has no intention of stopping drinking. I feel really sad for her and for me because I will miss her, but I have to stay away.

I have packed my lunch box with extra treats for my drive home from work this afternoon. I won’t be visiting her for quite some time. When I got sober for a year +, I stayed away from her for this exact same reason. It was the only way to stick to my resolve of not drinking. I have to do the same thing now, it’s too difficult to be around her and my sobriety has to come first.

Willow00

No TC!!! Please stay with us. I feel the same way about only feeling “normal “ when drinking, but I know if we stick at it long enough, there’s light on the other side.

Dee and Suze are proof that if we can stay sober long enough, we will find joy again ❤️

I’m on day one. Stick with me TC we can do this

venuscat

Boy is your AV off and running Iove. s

We know you now....and we saw how much joy was in that photo you had up for a whiIe....that is sober TC and he is happy!!
No aIIeys for you my friend. God absoIuteIy did not intend that for you or for any of us.

For years I toId myseIf that I couId onIy feeI normaI if I drank, but it wasn't true.
In aII honesty ~ I am far from normaI. I am a fruit Ioop.
And whiIe I stiII feeI Ike an aIien a Iot of the time (funny cos I am actuaIIy), I am comfrotabIe in my own skin.
I am a happy aIien creature most of the time.

You can do this....it takes one day. One day of taking booze off the tabIe and feeIing not crash, and then it gets better.
How about tomorrow? s ❤️

Dee74

ah come on, man.
Thats BS, TC.

I'm sure like me you had many normal years before you got addicted.
Even here on SR I've seen you have long periods of you starting to awaken to a normal that's good and has nothing to do with drinking.

Is Normal blissful happiness all day every day? of course not - but I reckon you can see it from there.

The AV will argue two things relentlessly - that your normal state is drunk, and that you can't live your sober without losing your mind, or living unhappily..

There's several thousand people here who are evidence to the contrary.

Don't lose yourself in self pity.
Your normal state is like my normal state. Not effed up.

The longer you put off getting back into recovery the harder it will be.

D

TiredCarpenter

This God of ours seems to want me drunk and hurting.
If that changes, you guys will be the first to know.

Dee74

If you still feel this way when you sober up and you really want to talk God is an A hole PM me and I'll fill you in on the daily joys of being disabled TC

We have to do the best we have with what we've been given, man - thats goes for cerebral palsy, and alcoholism and a whole bunch of other stuff

I'm glad alcoholism is, really, simple and easy to manage.

Its good you're still posting but man - the weight of all stuff you are carrying right now must be crushing. Set it down.

Willow00

Sending you hugs TC
We really care what happens to you ❤️

venuscat

TC ~ pIease Iisten to Dee. I know you can hear him....I know you can hear aII of us. We Iove you. ❤️

HopefulYear777

TC- We all love you here. You will get through this. We need you here.
Hope

HopefulYear777

Willow- I feel you on your friend. I'm going through the same thing and it's so painful. My friend is two weeks away from being homeless. Her husband has had it and doesn't want her moving with him. I am more worried than she is. I'm doing everything I can to help with the process of moving but it's so hard when you have someone that drinks so much and so early. It's hard to get ideas across and make her understand the importance of doing things that need to be done. I'm taking on her anxiety.

When I was at her house the other day helping with the moving sale she offered me wine and I turned it down. Her response was "I knew you would say that.". It was an angry tone. She is the type that thinks she knows it all. I can't bring up the subject because she has already made it clear to me that it is her "one thing" to help her stomach, anxiety, etc. Not true about the one thing. I'm thinking that some of the prescription meds are mixing with the alcohol and making it even worse.

Anyway, I can only do what I can do. I will miss her being close but in the long run it will probably be for the best. She just doesn't do well with me being sober.

Willow- big hugs to you. Good job of heading home!
Hope

Willow00

I totally hear you Hope! Well done on staying strong! Really well done. I wish I had’ve said no to my friend. Sadly I can’t really help my friend anymore because it’s too dangerous for me to see her right now. She’s not gotten to the level of your friend, as she still has her home, but the way things are currently it’s not a happy home. She can’t see that alcohol is playing a huge role in her problems, and she doesn’t understand why I don’t want to drink with her. I have to take a huge step away

I’m on my lunch break, having a healthy lunch. The danger period will be in 4 hours when I finish work. I have to maintain my resolve to not drink. The AV is such a sneaky b####. Always finding excuses for stopping “tomorrow”. But tomorrow never comes. So it has to be today. I will not drink today. I’m posting now to keep my motivation going.

Dee74

I've seen many a well meaning friend try to save another and they both end up drowned Willow.
You're doing the right thing stepping back.

D

Dee74

time for a new thread:
https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...part-13-a.html (Class of May 2020 part 13)

D