Class of March 2020 Part 8
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Class of March 2020 Part 8
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Thanks Dee. Shotgun
I will look into serotonin boosting foods. You've actually made me think to be a bit more proactive in supporting my mental health through food and exercise. I'll start tomorrow
Have a good shift Billy and night all.
I will look into serotonin boosting foods. You've actually made me think to be a bit more proactive in supporting my mental health through food and exercise. I'll start tomorrow
Have a good shift Billy and night all.
s xx
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Morning all.
First up - I'm pretty sure I am not depressed in a clinical sense. I don't know the purpose of life and cannot see any point in what gives a lot of people value. But I don't 'tick the boxes' for depression. I'm also a bit low, partly because that's me and partly because of external stuff in my life. It is what it is and I'm ok with that.
Secondly, I've hit a good half way house for my never drinking v just for today problem. It's beginning to bore me, I spend too long thinking about it. So as a compromise I am going to commit at New Year not to drink in 2021. That's a period of time I can cope with and kicks any thought of drinking far enough down the road do to be irrelevant. I think 'forever' is too much for me to comprehend but I like being sober more than I liked being a drunk, so this way I get what I want without puzzling my poor brain too much.
This time next year I'll be 22 months sober and I can decide then whether I'll drink in 2022.
Have a great day people
First up - I'm pretty sure I am not depressed in a clinical sense. I don't know the purpose of life and cannot see any point in what gives a lot of people value. But I don't 'tick the boxes' for depression. I'm also a bit low, partly because that's me and partly because of external stuff in my life. It is what it is and I'm ok with that.
Secondly, I've hit a good half way house for my never drinking v just for today problem. It's beginning to bore me, I spend too long thinking about it. So as a compromise I am going to commit at New Year not to drink in 2021. That's a period of time I can cope with and kicks any thought of drinking far enough down the road do to be irrelevant. I think 'forever' is too much for me to comprehend but I like being sober more than I liked being a drunk, so this way I get what I want without puzzling my poor brain too much.
This time next year I'll be 22 months sober and I can decide then whether I'll drink in 2022.
Have a great day people
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Join Date: Mar 2020
Location: Poole, Dorset
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It's funny but for me it has to be 'I do not drink' 'I have no intention of of drinking now or ever' anything less (for me) feels like feeding the beast or keeping that door open for a relapse, giving the AV hope for a return into my life. I feel far more powerful shutting the door on it.
That said, it isn't the same for everyone, if this mindset works for you, go for it, ultimately you may be bluffing your AV when/if in January 2022 you think? 'Alcohol? No, not me, not ever' who knows. Sometimes it can be better just to go with the flow.
Love Billy x
That said, it isn't the same for everyone, if this mindset works for you, go for it, ultimately you may be bluffing your AV when/if in January 2022 you think? 'Alcohol? No, not me, not ever' who knows. Sometimes it can be better just to go with the flow.
Love Billy x
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I guess Im with Billy - when I look back to the disaster my drinking caused me there's no way in hell i'll go back.
But...I'm in a good place.
If your life, or your mental health, is not all you want it to be, Be, I can understand the little crack of the door.
But I'll say it now - going backwards and drinking again won't solve anything.
If it did none of us would be here on SR.
D
But...I'm in a good place.
If your life, or your mental health, is not all you want it to be, Be, I can understand the little crack of the door.
But I'll say it now - going backwards and drinking again won't solve anything.
If it did none of us would be here on SR.
D
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Yes, I hear you both about the 'never' thing but for me not drinking ever is a growing realisation rather than immediate hit (and of course, life being bizarre, I feel much more comfortable with 'forever' this last week since I've decided not to think about it! Go figure????)
Im going to let it grow. I'm working on it, I think acceptance that I cannot drink is tied to pride, accepting what a mess I was, that I wasn't in control. Most people seem able to do that immediately, for me it is taking work. My pride tells me I used to be ok and would be in the future, so that needs work.
Im so comfortable in my sobriety right now, it seems a good time to work on this. I think the problem would come if I stopped working at it, I'm pretty determined (as you may well be picking up as I don't let this go, I keep banging on about it!)
Im going to let it grow. I'm working on it, I think acceptance that I cannot drink is tied to pride, accepting what a mess I was, that I wasn't in control. Most people seem able to do that immediately, for me it is taking work. My pride tells me I used to be ok and would be in the future, so that needs work.
Im so comfortable in my sobriety right now, it seems a good time to work on this. I think the problem would come if I stopped working at it, I'm pretty determined (as you may well be picking up as I don't let this go, I keep banging on about it!)
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It wasn't a St Paul on the road to Damascus moment for me either 
I was scared of dying so I stopped but I stayed stopped because the act of not drinking anymore changed me over time...I built a world drinking had no place in
After I posted to you I think I put it better to someone else...
So yeah I get it's a process...keep the door open if that makes the thought of never again less confronting...but you already know as well as I do that drinkings not the solution to anything that ails you, either now or in the future, Be
D
I was scared of dying so I stopped but I stayed stopped because the act of not drinking anymore changed me over time...I built a world drinking had no place in
After I posted to you I think I put it better to someone else...
Originally Posted by Dee74 
Thoughts are thoughts...its what we do with them that counts.
I dunno about anyone else but drinking bought me to my knees and nearly killed me.
I've worked hard to build a new sober life I love and I've grown in that effort.
The idea that drinking holds anything positive for me is laughable to me now...
so those thoughts/urges/cravings - call them what you will - are sending out messages to someone who no longer exists.
Its a letter to someone who no longer lives there.
Return to Sender.
D
I dunno about anyone else but drinking bought me to my knees and nearly killed me.
I've worked hard to build a new sober life I love and I've grown in that effort.
The idea that drinking holds anything positive for me is laughable to me now...
so those thoughts/urges/cravings - call them what you will - are sending out messages to someone who no longer exists.
Its a letter to someone who no longer lives there.
Return to Sender.
D
D
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Posts: 2,279
Dee - can I thank you on behalf of all of us for your persistence and patience in supporting us. It must drive you potty at times watching people like me flailing about with stuff that is so obvious to you. I couldn't do it I wouldn't have the patience!
Also thanks Venus for your support too, so consistently kind. You two (and others) deserve sainthood
Also thanks Venus for your support too, so consistently kind. You two (and others) deserve sainthood
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“This is about all the bad days in the world.
I used to have some little bad days, and I kept them in a little box.
And one day, I threw them out into the yard. "Oh, it's just a couple little innocent bad days."
Well, we had a big rain.
I don't know what it was growing in but I think we used to put eggshells out there and coffee grounds, too.
Don't plant your bad days. They grow into weeks. The weeks grow into months. Before you know it you got yourself a bad year.
Take it from me. Choke those little bad days. Choke 'em down to nothin'. They're your days. Choke 'em!”
― Tom Waits
I used to have some little bad days, and I kept them in a little box.
And one day, I threw them out into the yard. "Oh, it's just a couple little innocent bad days."
Well, we had a big rain.
I don't know what it was growing in but I think we used to put eggshells out there and coffee grounds, too.
Don't plant your bad days. They grow into weeks. The weeks grow into months. Before you know it you got yourself a bad year.
Take it from me. Choke those little bad days. Choke 'em down to nothin'. They're your days. Choke 'em!”
― Tom Waits
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Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,449
I literally lie in bed sometimes thinking about the posts in this thread...I love the introspection, the search for truth.
And I love Dee's amazing responses....I love this:
I am just over 6 years sober, and I feel the same way.
The person who wanted and needed to escape from the world by getting blitzed doesn't exist anymore.
I remember her....I can see her when I look in the rearview mirror, but I don't really recognise her now. ❤️
(and thank you Be xxxxx).
And I love Dee's amazing responses....I love this:
.....so those thoughts/urges/cravings - call them what you will - are sending out messages to someone who no longer exists.
Its a letter to someone who no longer lives there.
Return to Sender.
Its a letter to someone who no longer lives there.
Return to Sender.
I am just over 6 years sober, and I feel the same way.
The person who wanted and needed to escape from the world by getting blitzed doesn't exist anymore.
I remember her....I can see her when I look in the rearview mirror, but I don't really recognise her now. ❤️
(and thank you Be xxxxx).
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Join Date: Mar 2020
Location: Poole, Dorset
Posts: 532
I also wanted to say thank you to both Dee and Suze, your commitment to supporting people on this site is admirable and I feel truely thankful for you both
Also Be, you have always been so insightful and realistic both on this thread and across the forums, I hope you know what a positive difference you make to people
Love Billy x
Also Be, you have always been so insightful and realistic both on this thread and across the forums, I hope you know what a positive difference you make to people
Love Billy x
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Join Date: Mar 2020
Location: Poole, Dorset
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Evening all,
A quick check in before bed, it's still pretty early but I have work quite early and I have been listening to these sleepcasts on my headspace app every night which starts off with a story and then plays relaxing sounds etc for around 45 minutes. Tonight's sleepcast is called "Snowville" I really enjoy them
On the home deco front I was wildly excited to discover I have a second pair of heavy cotton looped cream curtains (long) which I plan to put up in the spare room. I spent a heady hour looking for metal cream coloured curtain hold backs this eve
- it's the simple things
Love to all
Billy x
A quick check in before bed, it's still pretty early but I have work quite early and I have been listening to these sleepcasts on my headspace app every night which starts off with a story and then plays relaxing sounds etc for around 45 minutes. Tonight's sleepcast is called "Snowville" I really enjoy them
On the home deco front I was wildly excited to discover I have a second pair of heavy cotton looped cream curtains (long) which I plan to put up in the spare room. I spent a heady hour looking for metal cream coloured curtain hold backs this eve
- it's the simple thingsLove to all
Billy x
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