Class of March 2020 Part 6
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,329
I only get drinking thoughts when going to the market and seeing beer and wine displays all over the store. I don’t have a problem that they have a beer and wine aisle, but they are putting 6 and 12 packs right next to the meat and dessert sections like “this 12 pack of craft beer will go great with these juicy steaks”. It almost feels natural to want to grab some beer because it is marketed as normal. The good thing is I never drank while I ate so this is just an annoying distraction. Beer and wine is sold in every market here so it’s not like you can avoid seeing it while shopping.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2020
Location: Poole, Dorset
Posts: 532
Originally Posted by Be123 
Evening all - if I log into the job site now it gives me feedback on my interview, tells me 'Congratulations', and tells me to wait as they are going to make me an offer.
Thats all good but I'd much prefer a phone call to discuss the practicalities of taking the job on 😂 Still, it looks like success even if it's the oddest process ever. I'll be patient (honest)
Ive had lots of drinking thoughts today - not about today, just idealizing drinking in the future. Doesn't bother me, I just notice they are there and marvel at how deep the pattern of thinking is that suggests drinking would be GREAT even though I am 131 days sober and much much MUCH happier and healthier because I'm not drinking
Thats all good but I'd much prefer a phone call to discuss the practicalities of taking the job on 😂 Still, it looks like success even if it's the oddest process ever. I'll be patient (honest)
Ive had lots of drinking thoughts today - not about today, just idealizing drinking in the future. Doesn't bother me, I just notice they are there and marvel at how deep the pattern of thinking is that suggests drinking would be GREAT even though I am 131 days sober and much much MUCH happier and healthier because I'm not drinking
Thanks for your support yesterday, Be, Tink, Anna and Dee, meant alot,
Feeling a bit better today plus the sun is shining
Love Billy
x
Member
Join Date: Jul 2018
Posts: 2,279
Yeah suns out here too , it makes a difference. Glad you're feeling a bit better today billy
Booze in supermarkets doesn't bother me . It's there. I do find the marketing completely irresponsible though - I commented on someone's thread the other day 'Alcohol is an addictive depressant. Take it long enough and you'll be depressed and addicted'. Don't see that on any adverts!! Whilst we all have to take personal responsibility I think sometimes we give ourselves a hard time...the drug is absolutely lethal, what do we expect of a society where it is so encouraged? Some people are bound to get found out
Booze in supermarkets doesn't bother me . It's there. I do find the marketing completely irresponsible though - I commented on someone's thread the other day 'Alcohol is an addictive depressant. Take it long enough and you'll be depressed and addicted'. Don't see that on any adverts!! Whilst we all have to take personal responsibility I think sometimes we give ourselves a hard time...the drug is absolutely lethal, what do we expect of a society where it is so encouraged? Some people are bound to get found out
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 8,762
Dee might be able to help with the profile pic Billy. I can’t remember how I did mine. I think I did it on a computer, but I usually post from my phone and can’t see how I did it lol
Be it sounds like you have the job, but I agree, a phone call would be nice!
I’m sorry some of you have been feeling down. I know my moods are all over the place. I figure the first six months or more are a bit of a roller coaster ride. Sending you all love xx
Be it sounds like you have the job, but I agree, a phone call would be nice!
I’m sorry some of you have been feeling down. I know my moods are all over the place. I figure the first six months or more are a bit of a roller coaster ride. Sending you all love xx
Member
Join Date: Oct 2018
Posts: 1,254
Morning everyone. Hope your all well.
Feeling better this morning much brighter again, though i had a strange nights sleep, weird dreams and sweats. Id been doing a meal replacement diet so going to stop that and eat some 'proper' healthy food this week, see if that helps my moods... so just had porridge for breakfast of course !
Ive lost 1 stone in weight now which is good, just another stone to go.
Yes i think your right willow about 6 months, going to focus on just getting to that point and see if i feel better, being a bit kinder to myself in the mean time.
Feeling better this morning much brighter again, though i had a strange nights sleep, weird dreams and sweats. Id been doing a meal replacement diet so going to stop that and eat some 'proper' healthy food this week, see if that helps my moods... so just had porridge for breakfast of course !
Ive lost 1 stone in weight now which is good, just another stone to go.
Yes i think your right willow about 6 months, going to focus on just getting to that point and see if i feel better, being a bit kinder to myself in the mean time.
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,313
Originally Posted by Billymacintosh
Also could anyone help me out with adding a profile pic so it shows by my name in the threads? I tried before but now I just have a gigantor pic of one of my cats in my public profile
Love Billy x
Love Billy x
Originally Posted by Morning Glory
The pictures under your name are called avatars.
Here are the instructions.
Click on User CP on the top left of the page.
Then click on Edit Avatar on the left of that page.
You will see 550 avatars on several pages. Check the avatar you want and then scroll down and click on save changes.
If you want a custom avatar you will need to save a picture on your computer.
Then check the circle that says Use Custom Avatar.
Click on browse and find the image on your computer. Click on the image and click on open. Then click save changes.
The image can only be 150 by 150 pixels or less.
Here are the instructions.
Click on User CP on the top left of the page.
Then click on Edit Avatar on the left of that page.
You will see 550 avatars on several pages. Check the avatar you want and then scroll down and click on save changes.
If you want a custom avatar you will need to save a picture on your computer.
Then check the circle that says Use Custom Avatar.
Click on browse and find the image on your computer. Click on the image and click on open. Then click save changes.
The image can only be 150 by 150 pixels or less.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2018
Posts: 2,279
Well done Tink on dropping the stone!
I feel like I am beginning to make way for a relapse. I'm pretty chilled - it's not going to happen today and probably not any time soon - but I feel like my thinking is changing and I am letting in thoughts about drinking that I haven't done up to this point.
Dont worry about me - posting this on here is a big move for me and, as I said, it's not a pressing thing (god, how that's changed since when I was drinking and I was desperate for a drink all the time!!). It's just I find myself letting in thoughts about, 'When I'm on holiday I'll drink and it'll be nice' or 'At x point I'll just drink for a few days'. I don't really know what to do about that, apart from continue to stay sober and hope they'll pass.
Dee, Venus or anyone else - ideas?
I feel like I am beginning to make way for a relapse. I'm pretty chilled - it's not going to happen today and probably not any time soon - but I feel like my thinking is changing and I am letting in thoughts about drinking that I haven't done up to this point.
Dont worry about me - posting this on here is a big move for me and, as I said, it's not a pressing thing (god, how that's changed since when I was drinking and I was desperate for a drink all the time!!). It's just I find myself letting in thoughts about, 'When I'm on holiday I'll drink and it'll be nice' or 'At x point I'll just drink for a few days'. I don't really know what to do about that, apart from continue to stay sober and hope they'll pass.
Dee, Venus or anyone else - ideas?
Member
Join Date: Mar 2020
Location: Poole, Dorset
Posts: 532
[QUOTE=Be123;7473181]Well done Tink on dropping the stone!
I feel like I am beginning to make way for a relapse. I'm pretty chilled - it's not going to happen today and probably not any time soon - but I feel like my thinking is changing and I am letting in thoughts about drinking that I haven't done up to this point.
Dont worry about me - posting this on here is a big move for me and, as I said, it's not a pressing thing (god, how that's changed since when I was drinking and I was desperate for a drink all the time!!). It's just I find myself letting in thoughts about, 'When I'm on holiday I'll drink and it'll be nice' or 'At x point I'll just drink for a few days'. I don't really know what to do about that, apart from continue to stay sober and hope they'll pass.
Is there anything specific you can think of makes you think this might happen Be?
Apart from those thoughts that is, what's different about them now that might lead to a relapse at some point?
One thing you might do is go back to the beginning of your journey on SR and read the journey that you've been on (are on) just to see how far you've come. I remember your posts right back from when you joined (a few days before me) and you inspire me.
As you've said take it day by day, if the urge becomes strong - post first, we are right behind you to support and help you
Love Billy x
I feel like I am beginning to make way for a relapse. I'm pretty chilled - it's not going to happen today and probably not any time soon - but I feel like my thinking is changing and I am letting in thoughts about drinking that I haven't done up to this point.
Dont worry about me - posting this on here is a big move for me and, as I said, it's not a pressing thing (god, how that's changed since when I was drinking and I was desperate for a drink all the time!!). It's just I find myself letting in thoughts about, 'When I'm on holiday I'll drink and it'll be nice' or 'At x point I'll just drink for a few days'. I don't really know what to do about that, apart from continue to stay sober and hope they'll pass.
Is there anything specific you can think of makes you think this might happen Be?
Apart from those thoughts that is, what's different about them now that might lead to a relapse at some point?
One thing you might do is go back to the beginning of your journey on SR and read the journey that you've been on (are on) just to see how far you've come. I remember your posts right back from when you joined (a few days before me) and you inspire me.
As you've said take it day by day, if the urge becomes strong - post first, we are right behind you to support and help you
Love Billy x
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,329
BE, I would focus on how do think you will stop drinking after the holiday is over. It might start with “I’ll only drink on weekend nights”, but as we know this is a will be hard to control. Once you start drinking, all bets are off when you will stop.
As an example, I dropped my daughter off for her first day of college a few years ago. I stayed in a hotel that night and justified that I deserved to drink because I was emotional. Well several years later and very few non drinking days later I joined SR in March.
As an example, I dropped my daughter off for her first day of college a few years ago. I stayed in a hotel that night and justified that I deserved to drink because I was emotional. Well several years later and very few non drinking days later I joined SR in March.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,375
Originally Posted by Bilr44
BE, I would focus on how do think you will stop drinking after the holiday is over. It might start with “I’ll only drink on weekend nights”, but as we know this is a will be hard to control. Once you start drinking, all bets are off when you will stop.
As an example, I dropped my daughter off for her first day of college a few years ago. I stayed in a hotel that night and justified that I deserved to drink because I was emotional. Well several years later and very few non drinking days later I joined SR in March.
As an example, I dropped my daughter off for her first day of college a few years ago. I stayed in a hotel that night and justified that I deserved to drink because I was emotional. Well several years later and very few non drinking days later I joined SR in March.
s xx
Member
Join Date: Jul 2018
Posts: 2,279
Thanks guys. You are right Bilr, there would be no way I'd control it this time. Even typing that makes me see how ridiculous it is.
I hear people talk a lot about acceptance on here and I guess I haven't fully accepted that I can NEVER drink normally. In my mind it's great being sober now, but in the future...well, wouldn't it be great to go back to drinking normally again? I'm grateful I have the sober time and space to work on that, the immediate urges to drink have left me
Morning all, hope everyone has a great day
I hear people talk a lot about acceptance on here and I guess I haven't fully accepted that I can NEVER drink normally. In my mind it's great being sober now, but in the future...well, wouldn't it be great to go back to drinking normally again? I'm grateful I have the sober time and space to work on that, the immediate urges to drink have left me
Morning all, hope everyone has a great day
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 8,762
Be I think that’s how I was before previous relapses, thinking about a drink in the future, and that I could control it. Turns out I can’t. Every time it’s been harder and harder to stop. I don’t think I’d fully accepted that I simply cannot control drinking. It controlled me, and I would drink more and more and more. I think I’ve finally accepted that. It’s taken a while to really realise it though.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2018
Posts: 1,254
Hi everyone hope your all well.
Yeah i agree on the acceptance, it certainly took me a long time and alot of failed attempts to accept and realise that i just could not drink anymore.
Another quiet day here, done some home schooling, will have lunch and go for walk. Heard nothing from my mam so guess she feels its ok to have spoke to me way she did. I keep having to justify to myself to stop feeling guilty, that in no circumstances is it ok to say hurtful things to another person. I need to learn to be stronger and put upsets out of my head.
Yeah i agree on the acceptance, it certainly took me a long time and alot of failed attempts to accept and realise that i just could not drink anymore.
Another quiet day here, done some home schooling, will have lunch and go for walk. Heard nothing from my mam so guess she feels its ok to have spoke to me way she did. I keep having to justify to myself to stop feeling guilty, that in no circumstances is it ok to say hurtful things to another person. I need to learn to be stronger and put upsets out of my head.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,329
Tink, my Mam/Mom/Mum would do the same thing. She would speak to me saying terrible things, try and make feel feel guilty, and expect me to apologize for her misgivings. I always felt that apologizing to her would empower her to continue this behavior. Ignoring was the best option, even though it didn’t feel like it at the time. Then I would get the guilt trip, “I’m your mother” rap. So I ignored and my sister argued, not sure there is a happy medium.
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 8,762
Tink and Bilr, it’s so not ok for mothers to be so mean and disrespectful, even if they do have their own problems.
I feel very grateful to have had a loving relationship with my own mother and I feel so sad that your relationship with your mothers hasn’t been good. At the end of the day, we really do need to look after our own mental health though, and sometimes we need to put a bit of distance between ourselves and others if it’s not healthy to be close, even if it’s only a temporary thing. I really don’t have any answers, but I do think therapy with a counsellor can be really useful to help us work out the best way to deal with difficult situations and relationships.
Sending love ❤️
I feel very grateful to have had a loving relationship with my own mother and I feel so sad that your relationship with your mothers hasn’t been good. At the end of the day, we really do need to look after our own mental health though, and sometimes we need to put a bit of distance between ourselves and others if it’s not healthy to be close, even if it’s only a temporary thing. I really don’t have any answers, but I do think therapy with a counsellor can be really useful to help us work out the best way to deal with difficult situations and relationships.
Sending love ❤️
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