24 Hour Recovery Connections Part 476
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: NE Wisconsin USA
Posts: 6,223
23 weeks today...161 days
need to note that because, for various reasons (health wise)
I'm feeling "genuine and well-being." I'm thinking positively and purposeful.
This is, well...fantastic because genuine is something I valued but didn't have. I felt fake and acted fake. During my years of use and abuse ruined my personal identity. I became a chameleon for survival, and glommed on to people. What they were became what I was. Never really pursuing my own dreams, skills, creativity.
I'm not ruling the world just yet, but I think areas of my life are the most manageable then they ever have. Fears tied-in with alcohol/drugs, money, sex, food, housing, self-esteem are at their lowest point.
I'm not sure if over the past 5 1/2 I've been this well, even in all of the 40 years that I've been in recovery.
It's a good place and I want to share it with you all. With love and care, Gregory
need to note that because, for various reasons (health wise)
I'm feeling "genuine and well-being." I'm thinking positively and purposeful.
This is, well...fantastic because genuine is something I valued but didn't have. I felt fake and acted fake. During my years of use and abuse ruined my personal identity. I became a chameleon for survival, and glommed on to people. What they were became what I was. Never really pursuing my own dreams, skills, creativity.
I'm not ruling the world just yet, but I think areas of my life are the most manageable then they ever have. Fears tied-in with alcohol/drugs, money, sex, food, housing, self-esteem are at their lowest point.
I'm not sure if over the past 5 1/2 I've been this well, even in all of the 40 years that I've been in recovery.
It's a good place and I want to share it with you all. With love and care, Gregory
Maybe not ruling the world yet love , but your authenticity comes through in spades....you are such a kind, caring, intelligent and compassionate man. Honoured to call you my friend. xx ❤️
Hello
Thank you all for your sweet messages of support—they help so much. Thank you to Kenton for your beautiful post and the flowers that arrived today. Love you my dear friend. Xx They are absolutely gorgeous, smell lovely, and I have them on the nightstand in my bedroom, next to me as I try to get caught up on rest. I stopped everything as I’m getting a sore throat. My immunity is probably way down so I won’t do another thing today. Tea and water. I miss my mother so much. I’ve got to stay well so I can help Dad.
All of you truly helped to ease the heaviness of grief today more than you know.
Sending love, my heartfelt gratitude, and asking for 24 more hours
Xxxx
Love
Vo
Thank you all for your sweet messages of support—they help so much. Thank you to Kenton for your beautiful post and the flowers that arrived today. Love you my dear friend. Xx They are absolutely gorgeous, smell lovely, and I have them on the nightstand in my bedroom, next to me as I try to get caught up on rest. I stopped everything as I’m getting a sore throat. My immunity is probably way down so I won’t do another thing today. Tea and water. I miss my mother so much. I’ve got to stay well so I can help Dad.
All of you truly helped to ease the heaviness of grief today more than you know.
Sending love, my heartfelt gratitude, and asking for 24 more hours
Xxxx
Love
Vo
Here to pledge 24 with a broken heart. My mother passed away from cancer on Friday morning. I haven’t logged on in a few days, but I think it’s important to share and begin to slowly heal.
Like so many I’m expected to bounce right back and be productive, so I’m very slowly trying to function again. I’m off work this week, thankfully. I feel so weak and tired...and miss her so much. It’s important to stay sober and stay connected. I know there are many here that know how I feel right now, 5 days after she left this world. It’s hard to acknowledge and tempting to run myself down with tasks but I need to feel what I need to to heal. Maybe short bursts of things, then rest. I had groceries delivered as it’s difficult to drive. My focus is gone and nothing seems real.
Like so many I’m expected to bounce right back and be productive, so I’m very slowly trying to function again. I’m off work this week, thankfully. I feel so weak and tired...and miss her so much. It’s important to stay sober and stay connected. I know there are many here that know how I feel right now, 5 days after she left this world. It’s hard to acknowledge and tempting to run myself down with tasks but I need to feel what I need to to heal. Maybe short bursts of things, then rest. I had groceries delivered as it’s difficult to drive. My focus is gone and nothing seems real.
Vovo, I'm so, so sorry. There are no words to help you at this time. But I'm going to try. The way you've written about your mum in the years I've known you has demonstrated without any shadow of doubt the strength of the incredible bond the two of you share. And I deliberately write share in the present tense because the bond between you and your mum never dies. The love you share lives on. It lives on through you, it loves on in your memories and it lives on through your interactions with others until the end of time. It's the strongest type of fuel in the universe and it's always there for you. It may not feel like it now, but that love is going to help you get through the next few days, months and years. Right now, you're probably in shock. Death is always a shock. The death of a loved one turns everything we know upside down. The world itself seems different somehow after someone we love dies. There's a shift that only we seem to notice. The planet keeps turning and the sun still comes up every morning ....doesn't it know that our world has just come crashing down? And it's so difficult to believe that our loved one is no longer here. They've always been here. We've never known life without them. How will we cope? Do we want to cope? And that's when you draw on all that love Vovo and you pull it around yourself like a warm blanket and you think about your mum and you remember her and you let the tears fall and you talk to her and you tell her how much you miss her and you thank her for all that love and all that strength and somewhere in the back of your mind you hold on to the knowledge that you're going to get through this. It's going to take time but one day you'll notice yourself laughing about something and you'll realise the world has shifted back into place. And you'll never stop thinking about your mum.... You'll probably think about and miss her every single day but your grief will have transformed into something else. Right now, you're on a stormy ocean of grief with huge waves knocking you over .... With no time to catch your breath before the next wave of grief strikes. But over time, those waves calm down until they resemble little waves gently lapping upon the shore. They're always there.... They never disappear, but somehow they become an acceptable, almost comforting part of your world. The only way through grief is through it and the journey can be tough but please remember that you're never on your own. We're all here - any time of the day or night. Sending you so much love Vovo ❤️. I'll always be here for you xx
Love to everyone and 24 more for me please xx
Love to everyone and 24 more for me please xx
Xxxx
She will always be with you love.
My mum is with me.....since I lost her, it's as if I have been infused with her strength and goodness.
More love darling.....we are all holding you tight. s xx ❤️❤️❤️
My mum is with me.....since I lost her, it's as if I have been infused with her strength and goodness.
More love darling.....we are all holding you tight. s xx ❤️❤️❤️
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