ButterMarsh

Me too, CB. SR is my therapist, best friend, confidante, other family, forever home... So blessed to be here.

DaisyBelle7

Suze & Cityboy, thank you so much! I think I made it sound worse than it is. I meant that my friend can drink and I could never tell that she was drunk so she can function when she drinks, or maybe she doesn’t get drunk? Now that sounds weird too. I don’t know how to explain it. My perception of everyone else was always skewed, and I just assumed everyone was as drunk as I was, but she always seemed normal.

Anyway, I’m completely safe with her. She never drinks and drives. We’ve talked about this before because I had a DUI and I told her that a couple of years ago. Just got back from dinner and it was awesome! Before I left though, I had a huge fight with my daughter, and then a huge fight with my husband, then my son got home and told me that I’m the reason everyone is mad. I’m not going to go into details because it would bore everyone to tears.

So as I was sitting and waiting for my friend to pick me up, I kept thinking how these fights would be a trigger for me to drink before. I knew for sure that I didn’t want to drink, so I cried, then I recited the Serenity Prayer about 15 times in my head. Then my friend came, and I told her what happened (I usually never share stuff like that). We went to the restaurant and I ordered a Sprite, we talked, and I eventually told her about my sobriety. She gave me a high 5 and said she was so proud of me. She said she never knew I had a problem with alcohol, so I told her everything that I had been hiding.

Dee74

that's a great outcome DB7

D

ButterMarsh

I'm really glad you had a good time with your friend, db7. Opening up can take a load off and leave us feeling lighter and happier. I hope you get to work through whatever it is you were fighting about with your daughter and husband... Hugs.

dontlookbacchus

Hi
Wow. DB7. That is really inspiring. Thank you.

You are really building up strength, confronting situations and people with honesty. Defining the new you.
It may be that your friend has contemplated becoming sober herself but felt powerless to go for it. Your honest example might have just shown her she can.

Before you met her, letting out your emotion, meditating on the serenity prayer to find your centre before you went is just as much a sign of strength.

Hard as it is, maybe it is in critical, stressful, situations like this, where we choose NOT to drink, that show us we are winning. Really proud of you, db7. I know all of us are.

So, I am doing OK. Well even. Weekend battle commences. It doesn't feel quite as daunting today but I don't want to become complacent.
I still do my to-do lists for each weekend. As a physical email list . In this way, I focus on tasks. Activity, including rest, might be the enemy of my personal AV.

About to check-in with my extended sobriety team in the Weekenders.

Have a happy, safe and sober weekend all

dlb.

MrWolfie68

Good morning/afternoon everyone depending on where you are in the world.

Belated congrats to you Suze for your milestone. Breathtaking.

Daisy...so glad your visit with your friend went so well. That's awesome. Hope the family life is calmed down today.

Good to hear from you Buttermarsh and so glad things are going well for you. I am still amazed sometimes how helpful it is to touch base with everyone on SR. Strength in numbers.

Just working through the weekend here. Kinda had a bad day yesterday, just feeling off, but by bedtime I thought to myself if that's what I consider a bad day now, something's working. It's all about perspective.

FK and Cityboy...hope all is well. Just sitting here in the frozen north waiting for spring. You both have me a bit more enthusiastic about fishing than I have been in quite some time. Was talking to a friend and he mentioned the Walleye are running in parts of the Great Lakes. Think I will pass on that adventure as he is a pretty solid beer drinker. No need to temp fate at this point.

Hope everyone is well and having a strong weekend.

Cityboy

Sounds like your dinner date with friend was perfect daisybelle7.

Conflicts with loved ones have been at the top of the list for sending me on a drinking binge. Not like a few beers or a bottle of wine, but fights with dad or my wife would typically send me to the liquor stash cabinet to tie on a really good one.

I have been addressing the issues at home. Not through but making progress. Due to my dad's age and condition, nothing is going to be resolved but I can hopefully deal with it without internalizing it so bad.

jr67

Happy Leap Day, class, and Sadie Hawkins Day, if that's still (or ever was) a thing.

All's well here in the 8 a.m. hour. On to my second cuppa; just one problem at the mo:

Yes, we have no bananas.


Jr s bananas, but this pic will have to do this morning.

jr67

^^
Sadie Hawkins Day: Ever since 13th century Scotland?

... From a random web article about Sadie Hawkins Day:

LEAP DAY
A similar tradition is associated with February 29 in leap years. Long ago, Leap Day also was known as “Ladies’ Day” or “Ladies’ Privilege,” the only period of time when women were free to propose to men. It is thought that this event may have been based on a Scottish law in the 1200s or on an Irish legend, but no one knows for certain.

venuscat

You are definitely all 'winning' dear dlb.

Awesome posts. s xx ❤️

fishkiller

Good morning class!

Good work daisyb7! I bet it felt good to get it out!
Hello butters glad you are better!
wolfie if you are ever in VA message me and we will kill some fish!
bacchus glad you are working your plan!

Hello!
venus
city
jr

I had a rough part of the day yesterday. Nothing happened I just had some anger issues for some reason. That caused my AV to kick in a little which pissed me off more. lol

Pretty sure I know what's happening. I'm losing a little focus I believe and the so called pink cloud is gone.
I'm getting too caught up in what's going on around me, what needs to be done, what's coming up, what I'd rather be doing than whatever it is I am doing at the moment, etc.

In other words I think I need to slow down and get my head right.

Gonna do some organizational therapy this weekend with the wife. I love organizing.

Anyway thanks for letting me whine a little
Life is great I just need to get my head out of my ***

venuscat

(((fish))) ❤️❤️

Doing the same thing here, but by myself because I am a force to be reckoned with when I get going and there is no need to scare my husband.

Cityboy

Are you getting exercise FK? Aside from my cycle of being in a raw mood the following night after a drinking binge, my inconsistent exercise regiment associated with work has proven over and over the effect it has on my mood.

DaisyBelle7

Thank you all so much! Your posts brought tears to my eyes. Things are a little better at home today. It’s incredibly difficult seeing my daughter battle her eating disorders and self-injury. I saw Shutterfly memories yesterday from when she was 2 and smiling, and happy, and I could protect her from the world. It’s one of the worst things to go through when your children are suffering.

Cityboy, conflicts with family and social anxiety were my two biggest triggers to drink. I totally understand what you’re saying.

Jr, cool tree!

fk, I had moments like what you’re describing last week. I hope things turn around for you.

fishkiller

Boss has let me take a lunch break!

I am very active but no set exercise regimen.
Need to work on that.
Thinking about it, I was pretty wore out from my kayak adventure Sunday and didn't do much physically Mon. - Wed. so maybe that had something to do with it.

Good point city

Thanks daisy! I feel better today.
Hate that your daughter is suffering. My daughter had some issues growing up and I know it's about the worst thing you can witness.
She has worked through the mental aspect I believe but she has ankylosing spondylitis which will eventually fuse her spine, hips and other joints. I really hadn't thought about it in a while but I feel kind of guilty because it is an autoimmune disease. I have an autoimmune disease and it is said they are passed down. So technically it's my fault.

venuscat

Ahhhh fish, I understand. s ❤️

And Daisy honey....glad things are a bit better today.
It hurt my heart to read that your family told you that it's your fault they are angry with you. That isn't very kind. s

I hope you know that we think you are wonderful. s ❤️

DaisyBelle7

fk, I have two autoimmune diseases, and also passed on the gene for Ehlers Danlos. I also suffered with anorexia and self-injury (well before it was “mainstream”) in my teens & 20s. Then there’s the alcoholism gene from my mom’s side. I’ve been sitting here feeling horrible that I gave these things to my daughter. I know what you mean. I try to remind myself, even though it’s really hard, that we can’t help our genetics. We didn’t have kids knowing they’d inherit these awful diseases. It makes logical sense to me, but it hurts my heart. I’m sure you understand that as well. I’m sorry that you watched your daughter battle similar things.

I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be a Debbie Downer, and I don’t want to bring anyone else down. I really have so many things to be grateful for.

DaisyBelle7

Thank you, Suze. ❤️❤️❤️

venuscat

Same in my family.....we have neurofibromatosis. It is a terrible disease.
My mum was told that she couldn't pass it on as she didn't have it....but it wasn't exactly the case. She didn't know. I would much rather be here with bone tumors than not having been born, if you know what I mean. s xx

DaisyBelle7

That’s a really good point, Suze. I hadn’t thought of it that way. I’m 50 and my mom is 70. We didn’t know our health history because my mom was adopted. She only found out 7-8 years ago that Hashimoto’s, alcoholism and Ehlers Danlos run in her family. Plus, back then, they didn’t even know about this stuff being genetic or really much at all about autoimmune diseases. As much as I’ve suffered, I am happy my mom chose to have me.