jr67

Good morning Ms. Frumps.

I hope you had a good weekend. I did. Had to work part of Saturday and Sunday, but a nice 3-birthday party last evening at our local place, and the mgmt threw in the desserts, gratis.

A wonderful creme brulee for jr (practicing his French), and those who had the chocolate sacre tortes had no complaints, either.

I don't eat a lot of steaks, but I was sitting next to the 95-year-old, and we decided to split the large NY sirloin (do they call them NY sirloins in London or Adelaide, I wonder); she wolfed down her half as I did mine.

Sleep is good, if only you and I could balance each other out to a happy medium. Actually I see mine heading back towards normal, slowly but surely.

So Happy mutual 40. Life begins at 40!

venuscat

Hey Sober45 and jr s

I sometimes worry about those of us who take off like an airplane when we get sober and try to achieve everything and we need to do it immediately. It is fantastic to start to feel well again, and I also started sleeping like a happy log the second I stopped drinking.

And yes, there seems to be just so much to do. Things we haven't attended to for years, including chores.

But I knew that if I pushed myself to work work work and get everything done now, I would also end up feeling gee, what is the point if I can't have a drink to relax?

Because relaxation needs to be included in our recovery plan. I really believe that.

And sure, I didn't know how to relax sober in the beginning, but I learned around AA/NA meetings. It was the going out for coffee part...we were all (pretty much) sober, and here was this rowdy group of 20 at a popular cafe in St Kilda Melbourne on a Saturday night....eating dinner, drinking coffee and soft drinks and such, and having a ball. I can still hear the laughter in my head.

And I can remember nights when I wasn't feeling strong and one of my friends would make me go. Even unhappy Suze had a wonderful time sitting in that cafe listening to older members talk about the ways they got through Saturdays in the beginning and how glad they are that they persisted. Experience, strength and hope. Just magic.

Now, no matter how much I have to do (which is TONS), I take an hour or two a day for things I love, and just zone out and have fun.

Currently, for example, I have trained a squirrel. Oh yes really. It is a fantastic story. Her name is Favvy. Anyway....on with the day. s ❤️

ButterMarsh

All the best tomorrow, db... Prayers for a quick recovery ❤🤗

Cityboy

Jr, is a NY sirloin the same as a NY strip steak? What they call a NY strip is a cut off the loin, and of course the sirloin comes from the ham, I think. Have not heard of NY sirloin.

I've wondered about Boston butts, which is a cut off the shoulder, not the butt, what they call them in Boston?

Cityboy

I've thought about what you are saying venuscat. That's a big reason I'm still kind of keeping it on the down low and not blabbing to everyone that I've quit drinking. I feel like I've completed a drive for a touchdown but still have 58 minutes left to play.

DaisyBelle7

Ditto

Cityboy

We have discussed excessive eating/ weight gain. I'm sure it's different for different people. For the last four weeks, I have just felt like eating anything I could get my hands on. That feeling seems to have pretty much gone away finally. While drinking, it was going to be impossible to ever truly maintain a healthy diet and exercise routine. I'm hoping that now these issues can finally be properly addressed.

Sober45

Thanks Venuscat. Yes, I want it all done NOW! And I agree 100% that relaxation should be part of every day. Balance is so difficult for me.

I really seem to hate mundane tasks like washing dishes, making the bed etc. But how I feel when they are done is always awesome. No pain no gain I guess!

Honestly, this goes right back to my childhood. I had no responsibilities until I went to Uni and what a shock to the system that was. I had no clue how to do anything. Most of what I know now comes from my mother in law who really knows how to keep a clean house. You gotta clean as you're going, she'd always say. When you're going from one room to the other you gotta look around first to see if there's anything you can take with you, she'd say. She's really an amazing woman and I'm so grateful to have her in my life.

The biggest challenge right now is my daugther. She lacks discipline just like me. Difficult stuff going on with her today. I'm so disappointed in myself that I allowed the cycle to continue by not giving her enough responsibility. That said, she has agreed to take on one of the cat litters starting tomorrow and she doesn't know it yet, but she starts washing her own clothes tomorrow also (well maybe....but I know I wont).

If I hadn't been drinking these past 10 years I don't think any of this would be happening with her. She was a difficult child to raise, yes, but how many times did I run for the bottle when I didn't know how to deal with her. NO MORE!

If it weren't for SR I would be internalizing all of this right now and surely running home to get drunk...oh yes, this would be the perfect "excuse day" for getting drunk. Instead, in this moment right now, I'm just reminded once again of all it has taken so there will be no drinks tonight.

Thanks for letting me vent!

venuscat

I think it's important to get the replacement eating under control as soon as possible. It's way too hard to stop drinking and then deal with a new problem....I think the first few weeks for sure, but a healthy diet is really important long-term to feel good mentally as well as physically. s

Maybe Sober45, you could start her off with a bit of a sneaky.....ask her to help you do the laundry rather than do it. Maybe she could start with drying and folding. And then make it her job from now on.....it's the longest part of doing laundry and that way you still get to make sure the clothes are washed properly. xx

Sober45

I hear you venuscat. My daugther is vegan so I spend a lot of time in the kitchen cooking healthy meals. I eat that and then its junk afterwards....can we consider that balance? lol, don't answer that!

You are so right in saying I need to get on top of this now especially where I have some food sensitivities. It doesn't take much to throw my gut off.

Seeing what you wrote about washing the clothes highlights my tendency toward the all or nothing thinking. Gonna try to take your advise and move to the grey area a little more. Thanks

Cityboy

Sober45, I'm the same as far as internalizing stress factors from my kid and having it contribute to the cycle of drinking. And I'm quite certain that I would have been setting a better example for him had I not been drinking myself silly for all his life.

Sober45

Cityboy

Yes

dontlookbacchus

Hi class

It's a chilly morning and I am running out to the gym before I decide to skip it and regret that today.
I was definitely eating way too much, and sleeping tons for the first four weeks or so but was happy as my only goal was not to drink. That seemed enough.
I have other goals now, including getting stronger and slimmer.

DB7, I think you would be out of your surgery now. Thinking of you. Best of luck for a speedy recovery.
Sober45, It is great to read how you are helping to deal with something you may have previously switched off from. I am sure you daughter will be surprised, and deep down happy, for find the new you. Even if it comes with a new list of chores.
To your earlier post, if I even had a pink cloud this time getting sober, I don't know where it went ! I seemed to fast forward to into the grind.


Best of luck to all today
Have a safe, happy and sober one

dlb

fishkiller

Great morning class!

Thinking of you daisybelle7. Hope you are doing good.

sober45, kids need structure. They may not know it know but when they get older they will look back and say "wow, I'm so glad my parents made me do ________".
I had my daughter every other weekend when she was young. I had to work 7 days a week to make ends meet so she went to work on the roof and other jobs with me. I think the statute of limitations on child abuse have passed! LOL
I made sure she would not need to be reliant on anyone but herself.

Anyway, she know shows her mechanically un-inclined husband how to fix things around the house.
Loves to tell me about it!

bacchus, I have a healthy appetite but fortunately have a metabolism to handle it. Though I do have a little gut I'd like to see shrink. Maybe the lack of beer will help.

jr67

A quick post on the way to the work desk.

Dreary Tuesday mid-winter blahs outside. That's ok. No hangover, yay yet again.

Congrats on Yesterday Plus 1, one and all.

venuscat

I LOVE this fish.

My dad was a brilliant engineer who could design and make anything and everything including a house. Which he did, then hired a few dudes to help him build it.....it was our holiday house in Phillip Island Vic Aus and I was 4 years old when he began. I had my own baby wheelbarrow and I carried bricks. I think around 7 yrs old (the house was finished but he was always building a boat (from scratch, like the fibreglass dinghy), or brick fences for the house and he taught me how to lay bricks. The level was my first job. And I can still hear the cement mixer in my head.

I can fix almost anything whether I know how to or not....I have some very creative solutions. Well, except for cars....I can't change a tire. My dad was always worried that I could get badly hurt if I did it wrong, and I probably would knowing me.

I think your daughter is very lucky. s xx

Cynix

Hello classmates,

Checking in.

Day 20 it is! the last few weeks have went by in a haze.

have s great day everyone.

venuscat

Awesomeness dear Cynix!! s
And good to see you. xx

fishkiller

Thanks venus!

Congrats on 20 days cynix!