Class of November 2019 Part 4 - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
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Old 12-07-2019, 03:05 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Class of November 2019 Part 4


last part here

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...rt-3-a-20.html (Class of November 2019 Part 3)

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Old 12-07-2019, 03:07 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Thanks Dee
I was trying to post and the thread closed, thanks for the new one!
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Old 12-07-2019, 03:09 PM   #3 (permalink)
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I'm sorry your wife is still not on board JimiC but its really good you remain committed to recovery.

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Old 12-07-2019, 03:17 PM   #4 (permalink)
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SBTS and Trudging, it was when I drifted away from SR that I relapsed after more than a year and drank again too.
I’m on day 25 today

My “program” is simple.

SR every day, without fail.

Play the tape forward in all the awful vivid technicolor details to the really dreadful consequences whenever thoughts of drinking sneak in.

Always be prepared with my own favourite non-alcoholic drinks at social functions and even at home.

That’s about it.
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Old 12-07-2019, 04:09 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Am enjoying this thread very much today. Some good stuff.

Just back from the theatre. Went to a play called Hunger - was amazing and mercifully short - 75 mins. Had a nice cheap meal too beforehand and am home not too late. All in all, a very solid day but I'll look forward to chilling tomorrow on my own!
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Old 12-07-2019, 04:35 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Sorry willow

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Old 12-07-2019, 05:43 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Sounds like a good day Brian

I guess if I have a program, it's

-SR daily (really, several times a day... I always try to check in at least twice and post)
-avoid being around people drinking as much as possible
-stock up on nonalcoholic drinks and order something good at restaurants (tonic & lime, cranberry soda, Coke) so I don't feel deprived. Plain water is THE MOST boring alternative ever.
-reward myself for sobriety milestones
-lean on bf for support (in a limited way though... really, SR is my support)

It seems to be working so far.
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Old 12-07-2019, 06:22 PM   #8 (permalink)
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No worries Dee thanks for keeping the thread going with a new one

I had to go to an exercise class but I’m back now.

Boy is it hot! 32C but feels like higher with the humidity. Thirsty weather! So I’m being very mindful of staying hydrated with nice non-alcoholic drinks. I have to drink water to keep hydrated but I agree with SBTS, it’s pretty boring. I bought a sodastream so I can make my own soda water and add flavour to it. The bubbles make it a bit more exotic and fun, and I can add lemon or lime juice, or cranberry juice (my favourite) or even just cordial if I want. Sometimes just a wedge of fresh lemon or lime. More refreshing and fun than plain water
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Old 12-07-2019, 06:25 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Sorry not to say anything (although that might be such a nice break...he he)
I got another tummy bug that is worse that anything I can remember.....off to bed, with love to all of you. s ❤️
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Old 12-07-2019, 07:24 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Oh dear Suze ❤️
Lots of rest and fluids.
Hope you’re feeling better soon
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Old 12-07-2019, 07:30 PM   #11 (permalink)
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get well soon Suze

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Old 12-07-2019, 07:49 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Feel better Suze

I agree Willow, bubbles and lime help a lot in transforming water into something I actually want to drink. Sparkling water with a little flavoring of some kind is the minimum I need to be truly content with what I'm drinking

OK... off to bed now.
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Old 12-07-2019, 08:42 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Before bed I just went back and read over a bunch of my previous posts from the last time I fell off the wagon over the summer... I was in the January class and I had almost 6 months... trying to understand what happened. I'm shaking my head at myself because I can see all the warning signs now, in hindsight:

-not checking in on SR enough (weekly at best toward the end)
-working way too hard -- I was putting in a ton of time on evenings and weekends, which I've since stopped doing. I haven't worked a single weekend in months now.
-going to a million social events I should've never been at. I'm reading over my posts thinking back on what a hard time I had not drinking at some of those... and just shaking my head thinking WTF was I even doing there? Trying to prove something? Be a hero??
-not being honest with my bf about how hard it was for me to see him drink in front of me
-untreated depression at the time... though I think it related to a lot of these other things that were going on

I'm not trying to beat myself up about this, but I really think understanding a lot of this stuff will help me going forward. I have taken a very different approach this time, and so far I feel a lot better about how it's going.

OK, really going to bed now.
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Old 12-07-2019, 09:42 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Great insights into your own mind SoberBTS, I think self-knowledge and recognition of the triggers and dangers are really important in staying sober.
I found allowing myself to romanticise drinking was my worst enemy. Now I try to quickly nip those dreamy rose-tinted fantasies in the bud and expose them for the AV’s lies that they are.
Goodnight SoberBTS

It’s Sunday afternoon and I’m feeling super lazy so not forcing myself to do anything
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Old 12-07-2019, 11:12 PM   #15 (permalink)
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I don't have a sober plan written with a Mont Blanc pen on parchment and bound like the Gutenberg Bible, . . . I think I pretty much do what Willow and SBTS have described. . . keep pretty steady contact with SR by reading and posting a lot. As I've posted before, the method that has saved me from relapse many times over is to play the tape forward. I know I'll not only feel like **** in the morning, but I'll HATE myself if I drink. Also, my addiction was/is pretty severe, and I am genuinely afraid that if I relapse, I might not come back for months or years, if I make it back to sobriety at all. So I'm not going to risk it.
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Old 12-08-2019, 01:00 AM   #16 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Outonthetiles View Post
I don't have a sober plan written with a Mont Blanc pen on parchment and bound like the Gutenberg Bible, . . . I think I pretty much do what Willow and SBTS have described. . . keep pretty steady contact with SR by reading and posting a lot. As I've posted before, the method that has saved me from relapse many times over is to play the tape forward. I know I'll not only feel like **** in the morning, but I'll HATE myself if I drink. Also, my addiction was/is pretty severe, and I am genuinely afraid that if I relapse, I might not come back for months or years, if I make it back to sobriety at all. So I'm not going to risk it.
Makes sense to me. For me, I haven't given myself a chance to see what it's like after having broken the cycle for a significant period of time. I haven't hit it as hard as many on here, so I don't know if I am going to experience the transformation in terms of my brain function and all of that stuff as others, but maybe I will? And if I don't, and it's just a case of getting out of this mindless loop of not being able to move forward, I'll be happy that that is its own reward. That being said, I would like to see some sort of night and day improvement in my life - that would be pretty sweet! But I need to grow up and realise that the world isn't like that. Stick at this thing like a man on a mission for a full year and then come back and reassess what my goals beyond just sobriety moving forward. I think a big part of why I have kept relapsing is that I am way too quick to move beyond the vigilant stage and on to this stage 2 of how my life should like after getting sober. And I take my eye off where my main focus should be.

I'd be curious to hear from others with significant sobriety under their belt, how they made that transition from being massively vigilant and focusing purely on sobriety, to looking at other aspects of their life.
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Old 12-08-2019, 06:11 AM   #17 (permalink)
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Hope I didn't go too heavy on folks for a Sunday morning!
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Old 12-08-2019, 06:48 AM   #18 (permalink)
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I think you will Briansy.....see night and day improvement in your life. Sobriety really IS like that. s xx

My back still hurts (low) like someone stepped on me but the terrible nausea has passed. I may be able to eat today....gosh this is weird.....a timely (Christmas time, hard time of the year) reminder of what the world's worst hangover feels like.... I am just run down and picking up bugs too easily. I will be all good by tomorrow I am sure....and I won't pass it onto the class like Citrus did the other week....sheesh

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Old 12-08-2019, 07:08 AM   #19 (permalink)
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I think you will Briansy.....see night and day improvement in your life. Sobriety really IS like that. s xx

My back still hurts (low) like someone stepped on me but the terrible nausea has passed. I may be able to eat today....gosh this is weird.....a timely (Christmas time, hard time of the year) reminder of what the world's worst hangover feels like.... I am just run down and picking up bugs too easily. I will be all good by tomorrow I am sure....and I won't pass it onto the class like Citrus did the other week....sheesh

Well that's just crap ! Man, nausea is right up there as one of the worst sensations going. Hope you feel better soon!

Thanks for your input on my question. Encouraging to hear on a day when I'm generally feeling pretty flat
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Old 12-08-2019, 07:48 AM   #20 (permalink)
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Briansy, this might not speak to exactly what your wrote but I have night & day differences. This is from a couple of times of 6+ months without a drink, not very long term but I saw many positive changes.

The biggest was fitness and weight loss. Alcohol no longer got in my way, I lost fifty pounds and joined a gym for the first time in my life. I also went to a few different doctors that I put off for years.

Good day or bad, I was always present for my family. I could drive anywhere at any time.

Life became much more manageable, I was more organized at work and home. I woke up for work with my clothes ready and often healthy meals to take with me.

Sober me is more sociable and confident. Looking better and feeling better does this. Alcohol gives some people courage I guess, for me it makes me isolate & causes anxiety. Alcohol wants more alcohol, F that.

Those are a few things off the top of my head. Happy sober Sunday to all!
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