Class of July 2019 Part 4
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Class of July 2019 Part 4
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My wife is in Venice for a few days and we are having trouble communicating. Her wi-fi signal doesn't seem strong enough for a Skype connection, she can send email (not very satisfying) and we could chat on Skype if we could get on at the same time. The 6 hour time difference doesn't help.
My motivation is that I feel good when I'm sober and I hurt when I drink and drinking no longer gives me even a small buzz. There's a lot more than just that, but even that is enough.
Must be some bad weather coming. Shoulder, back, and elbow all hurt. Going to take some Tylenol and lie down for a bit.
My motivation is that I feel good when I'm sober and I hurt when I drink and drinking no longer gives me even a small buzz. There's a lot more than just that, but even that is enough.
Must be some bad weather coming. Shoulder, back, and elbow all hurt. Going to take some Tylenol and lie down for a bit.
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Join Date: Nov 2012
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Hope your aches subside dear Charon. 
s
What about Messenger? Just voice....it is the only way my sister (in Australia) and I can hear each other on the phone....Skype just doesn't work in her house for some reason, but Messenger is clear as a bell.
I am glad that you have no temptation to drink with your wife away....that's awesome....must be a peaceful feeling for you.
x
sWhat about Messenger? Just voice....it is the only way my sister (in Australia) and I can hear each other on the phone....Skype just doesn't work in her house for some reason, but Messenger is clear as a bell.
I am glad that you have no temptation to drink with your wife away....that's awesome....must be a peaceful feeling for you.
x
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Morning.
Kind of gloomy here. Going to give it a rest and take the day to relax and recover. There's work to do but it can wait.
F2F tonight. I did connect with my wife yesterday. Skype worked about 6 pm my time, midnight her's. Short but nice talk.
Not sure I wouldn't be tempted without the antabuse. Having that in my system is a protector that I am grateful for.
Kind of gloomy here. Going to give it a rest and take the day to relax and recover. There's work to do but it can wait.
F2F tonight. I did connect with my wife yesterday. Skype worked about 6 pm my time, midnight her's. Short but nice talk.
Not sure I wouldn't be tempted without the antabuse. Having that in my system is a protector that I am grateful for.
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Join Date: Jul 2019
Posts: 710
So you are already on 3 digits number Walnut! That is impressive. If you read this, can you confirm that 100 days is a real mile stone? I have read it several times, but as I am approaching, I don't seem to notice anything relevant (apart from the overall feeling better every day I stay sober).
Charon, it seems that you need the external accountability: wife/antabuse. I hope the meetings help with that. I am not on medication but I know I needed to tell my husband to make this happen. I am considering who else I am going to 'confess' to, until it becomes natural to state I am not drinking ever again because I do have a problem.
Don't let yourself get irritated but a bad wifi connection and similar. These are real no-problems. try to focus on the good parts of being alone. I become incredibly disorganised, for instance. I lead a very disciplined existence with a lot of activity. I am (pretend to be) always busy and active. When I am alone, I let the very lazy part of myself flourish. It does not happen often I am alone, so I indulge. No getting up until very late while I surf the net, not bothering to cook, etc. There must be something you particularly enjoy solo (AF of course)
I have not been posting the last few days, but I have been reading daily. You help me a lot in this journey.
Charon, it seems that you need the external accountability: wife/antabuse. I hope the meetings help with that. I am not on medication but I know I needed to tell my husband to make this happen. I am considering who else I am going to 'confess' to, until it becomes natural to state I am not drinking ever again because I do have a problem.
Don't let yourself get irritated but a bad wifi connection and similar. These are real no-problems. try to focus on the good parts of being alone. I become incredibly disorganised, for instance. I lead a very disciplined existence with a lot of activity. I am (pretend to be) always busy and active. When I am alone, I let the very lazy part of myself flourish. It does not happen often I am alone, so I indulge. No getting up until very late while I surf the net, not bothering to cook, etc. There must be something you particularly enjoy solo (AF of course)
I have not been posting the last few days, but I have been reading daily. You help me a lot in this journey.
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Join Date: Jul 2019
Posts: 640
It seems like it’s been at lot longer than 100 days, in a good way. I do have the dreams those on this thread were speaking of, I too wake up relieved when I realize it was just a dream. The temporary shame of the feeling of failure the dreams give me reinforces my commitment. I wonder if the guys working the convenience stores miss me?
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
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The guys in the bottle shop at Woolies were like my best friends.....I spent so much time in there. Funny and sad at the same time.
So much love to all of you. ❤️
.....re the 100 day mark. For me it didn't mean anything, but I have never counted days. It would drive me completely crazy. I was all about 1 month....6 months....1 year.....
But that's just me. xx
So much love to all of you. ❤️
.....re the 100 day mark. For me it didn't mean anything, but I have never counted days. It would drive me completely crazy.
I was all about 1 month....6 months....1 year.....But that's just me.
xx
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 652
Hello, Class of July 19.
Not so long ago PhoenixJ suggested that I join my class. As I quit in July 19 I think this must be my class and it sounds kind of nice the idea of journeying along with people who caught the same bus so to speak. The AV has been giving me grief lately, telling me that not drinking alcohol is silly and I am stupidly depriving myself. Then I remembered Phoenix's suggestion and here I am.
Seems that I arrived at a good time as reading the last few posts has been a lightbulb moment for me. The cravings coincided with my husband going away.
Charon, my husband was away for almost a week and just got back on Tuesday. I don't mind him being away - the house to myself is a treat. But 2 things happened - firstly there was association. Curling up on sofa with an expensive bottle of wine and sole access to the remote control was my ultimate home alone treat. So I struggled with that. But also all as BackandScared mentioned my routines went out the window; I ate rubbish, forgot to go to bed until 5am each day and stopped going to my exercise classes. Even though he is back now I still haven't managed to recover my routines. Like you Charon I also suffer when the bad weather sets in which also affects my motivation for keeping to routines (although I know alcohol aggravates that). Seems all this explains the cravings and makes the solution obvious - get back into my routines!
Walnut, congratulations on your 100 days! It is much nicer going into my corner shop now I dont have to be self-conscious about slurring. BackandScared you did make me giggle about it not being an interaction worth keeping. Very shrewd with your comments always. Although I have to own I am with Venuscat in that I am very fond of the guys in my local store, but mine is a corner shop so it is a community thing. But that makes me even more glad to be able to hold my head up when I pop in for groceries.
Thanks for letting me in - I promise not to woffle so much everytime!
Not so long ago PhoenixJ suggested that I join my class. As I quit in July 19 I think this must be my class and it sounds kind of nice the idea of journeying along with people who caught the same bus so to speak. The AV has been giving me grief lately, telling me that not drinking alcohol is silly and I am stupidly depriving myself. Then I remembered Phoenix's suggestion and here I am.
Seems that I arrived at a good time as reading the last few posts has been a lightbulb moment for me. The cravings coincided with my husband going away.
Charon, my husband was away for almost a week and just got back on Tuesday. I don't mind him being away - the house to myself is a treat. But 2 things happened - firstly there was association. Curling up on sofa with an expensive bottle of wine and sole access to the remote control was my ultimate home alone treat. So I struggled with that. But also all as BackandScared mentioned my routines went out the window; I ate rubbish, forgot to go to bed until 5am each day and stopped going to my exercise classes. Even though he is back now I still haven't managed to recover my routines. Like you Charon I also suffer when the bad weather sets in which also affects my motivation for keeping to routines (although I know alcohol aggravates that). Seems all this explains the cravings and makes the solution obvious - get back into my routines!
Walnut, congratulations on your 100 days! It is much nicer going into my corner shop now I dont have to be self-conscious about slurring. BackandScared you did make me giggle about it not being an interaction worth keeping. Very shrewd with your comments always. Although I have to own I am with Venuscat in that I am very fond of the guys in my local store, but mine is a corner shop so it is a community thing. But that makes me even more glad to be able to hold my head up when I pop in for groceries.
Thanks for letting me in - I promise not to woffle so much everytime!
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Join Date: Jul 2019
Posts: 710
Hello Lucinda,
It is great to read you around here too. I was reading another thread yesterday. I believe it may have been the 'September' one checking how some former classmates are doing;( if you read this, you can see I miss you). And I think it was Sober who suggested a video on youtube abut 'relapse prevention' by Dr. Steven Melemis. It only lasts 5 minutes. It is very good.
The absence of routines may be part of what he calls 'emotional relapse', when you stop self-care. Check it out. I watched it yesterday and wrote some of the advice to help me fix it in my mind.
I caught myself last week thinking about my wedding anniversary. It will be my 10th. Just for context: when I married I already had my two kids and I saw it more as a formality. I have always forgotten the anniversary date. My mother in law calls me early to remind me every year (it's a family joke, but I really never remember it). Until now. For the first time ever, the anniversary has become important. I was thinking about my 'poor husband' not able to even share a bottle of wine with me in such an important occasion. It became obvious I was 'planning' my relapse. Months in advance.
Counting days drives me nuts Venuscat. I just can't stop counting them. I wake up knowing what number of sober days I am waking up to. Go to bed with the same thought. I really hope it disappears.
It is great to read you around here too. I was reading another thread yesterday. I believe it may have been the 'September' one checking how some former classmates are doing;( if you read this, you can see I miss you). And I think it was Sober who suggested a video on youtube abut 'relapse prevention' by Dr. Steven Melemis. It only lasts 5 minutes. It is very good.
The absence of routines may be part of what he calls 'emotional relapse', when you stop self-care. Check it out. I watched it yesterday and wrote some of the advice to help me fix it in my mind.
I caught myself last week thinking about my wedding anniversary. It will be my 10th. Just for context: when I married I already had my two kids and I saw it more as a formality. I have always forgotten the anniversary date. My mother in law calls me early to remind me every year (it's a family joke, but I really never remember it). Until now. For the first time ever, the anniversary has become important. I was thinking about my 'poor husband' not able to even share a bottle of wine with me in such an important occasion. It became obvious I was 'planning' my relapse. Months in advance.
Counting days drives me nuts Venuscat. I just can't stop counting them. I wake up knowing what number of sober days I am waking up to. Go to bed with the same thought. I really hope it disappears.
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Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 1,928
Morning.
Life hasn't been super busy lately. I've got a cold and am just babying myself. Sleeping & napping a lot. Eating ready made stuff from the freezer. Like that. My wife won't be back till next friday so I will have time to get things straight. Just glad I am. lol
Everyone have a good & sober beginning to the weekend and a wonderful saturday & sunday.
Life hasn't been super busy lately. I've got a cold and am just babying myself. Sleeping & napping a lot. Eating ready made stuff from the freezer. Like that. My wife won't be back till next friday so I will have time to get things straight. Just glad I am. lol
Everyone have a good & sober beginning to the weekend and a wonderful saturday & sunday.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,474
I caught myself last week thinking about my wedding anniversary. It will be my 10th. Just for context: when I married I already had my two kids and I saw it more as a formality. I have always forgotten the anniversary date. My mother in law calls me early to remind me every year (it's a family joke, but I really never remember it). Until now. For the first time ever, the anniversary has become important. I was thinking about my 'poor husband' not able to even share a bottle of wine with me in such an important occasion. It became obvious I was 'planning' my relapse. Months in advance.
sI have had similar thoughts (still a new marriage for me and we haven't been out in ages, need to do our anniversary dinner)....and then I play the tape through. My husband doesn't even like wine, and share a bottle? But that would be nowhere near enough for me....and then what would happen? Errrr, anything could happen. And I don't think it would be pretty.
I am sure your husband will love a romantic dinner with you....candlelight maybe and music.....and what better gift for him than having a healthy beautiful wife?
❤️Hope your cold gets better very soon dear Charon!
s ❤️Hi Lucinda and Walnut.
s ❤️
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 652
Thanks, everyone for the warm welcomes.
Well done for catching your stinking thinking BackandScared. It sounds like you have a nice relationship with the mother in law? I will search out the YouTube video shortly and definitely pay attention to the self-care. I pushed myself to take the dog for an extra-long walk in the rain today and have booked a spin class for the morning. I didn't see the post where you 'miss me', I am not very good at negotiating forums. But it made me feel all warm and glowy knowing that you made it. Thank you. I have always liked reading your posts.
How sweet a new marriage, Venuscat! Which anniversary will it be? I hear you with the playing it forward. When I imagine drinking it is never a few glasses of wine, it is always a bottle (plus a beer maybe). I mean what exactly is the point of a few glasses? Just ridiculous. Right there in that thinking, I know that drinking isn't for me. One of my favourite sports when drinking was to make an inventory of all my husband's faults and make him listen to them on repeat. He is such a good man too, so completely undeserved.
Hope you feel better soon Charon. Well done for taking care of yourself and thanks for the weekend wishes.
Dee, thank you for always holding everyone on here so safely.
I am wondering what you all have planned for the weekend?
Well done for catching your stinking thinking BackandScared. It sounds like you have a nice relationship with the mother in law? I will search out the YouTube video shortly and definitely pay attention to the self-care. I pushed myself to take the dog for an extra-long walk in the rain today and have booked a spin class for the morning. I didn't see the post where you 'miss me', I am not very good at negotiating forums. But it made me feel all warm and glowy knowing that you made it. Thank you. I have always liked reading your posts.
How sweet a new marriage, Venuscat! Which anniversary will it be? I hear you with the playing it forward. When I imagine drinking it is never a few glasses of wine, it is always a bottle (plus a beer maybe). I mean what exactly is the point of a few glasses? Just ridiculous. Right there in that thinking, I know that drinking isn't for me. One of my favourite sports when drinking was to make an inventory of all my husband's faults and make him listen to them on repeat. He is such a good man too, so completely undeserved.
Hope you feel better soon Charon. Well done for taking care of yourself and thanks for the weekend wishes.
Dee, thank you for always holding everyone on here so safely.
I am wondering what you all have planned for the weekend?
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Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,474
Isn't it amazing what awful people we become when we get drunk Lucinda. 
s
We were married Sep 24 2017, so just 2 years. But it feels more like honeymoon phase now than it did earlier....there was a lot of adjustment for this Aussie, and marriage takes a little getting used to. I lived by myself prior to this for over 20 years.
Hope you are having a great Saturday....love to everyone. s xx
sWe were married Sep 24 2017, so just 2 years. But it feels more like honeymoon phase now than it did earlier....there was a lot of adjustment for this Aussie, and marriage takes a little getting used to. I lived by myself prior to this for over 20 years.
Hope you are having a great Saturday....love to everyone.
s xx
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