Jewel72

Dropped the kids off at the pool for an hour before son had to be somewhere. I walked the path in the park across the lot and gave thanks for the beautiful day and the fact that I was no longer drinking at the pool. My AV softly whispered, Are you sure this is for good? I replied (outloud; no one around), yes; I want nothing to do with you goodbye

I really wish that voice didn’t chatter, but I guess that’s why we’re here. To quiet the beast and win the battle against this toxic drink. I went 4 months, so I know it quiets with time, but I just wish I could shut her up for good.

I have some time to myself tonight. Going to get a healthy dinner and browse the Home Depot for some new kitchen cabinet knobs. Exciting stuff for a Thursday night, eh? Better than wasting money, time, and health on wine.

GreenDog

Dee74

I still believe we all have an innate worth - whether we realise it or not

D

Sapph21

So, today I did a thing. I went to work and then a lunchtime A.A. meeting. After work, I signed up for a running clinic. I did these for years, but like everything, I let that part of myself slide. It felt good to be running in a group again...and running sober these past few weeks on my own has been awesome, but I find I need to challenge myself with others a little bit in order to increase that distance a little. Also, I need to de-isolate myself, after all this time I’ve spent in isolation/drinking. Tonight was the first night of this clinic, and the people and pace of my group seem like a perfect fit for me at this moment. It’s good to be back at it finally I felt strong. I feel great today. My anxiety is subsiding and I feel even. Day 38 in the books. I hope you’re all well, I’ll catch up more personally tomorrow. Good night friends.

Dee74

Sounds like a great day Sapph

D

Jewel72

Greendog, 4 miles is great! I’ve just made it back to 4 miles and it’s only because I stopped drinking. My body was too lethargic and tired with all that wine!

And Sapph, Congrats on 38 days and well done getting back to a running club. I’ve always wanted to do one, and I may have to start that this fall if my kids’ schedule allows it.

Lots of runners here! Lots of runners are drinkers...bizarre! I thought I could go to a race at 7:45 AM and not think about alcohol, but the first person who came up to chat with me before last week’s race was an older man telling me all about his elevated heart rate due to drinking too much ale the previous week. Really? He went on and on about breweries and such. I barely said a word. Very weird. I was glad to see an ambulance there just in case this man collapsed! And how about those “Run for Wine” races where they hand you a glass right at the finish. That is the worse thing for a dehydrated body. Oh well I could rant on, but I know you already know about these happenings. I’m not going to take part. Just hoping to surround myself with non-drinkers.

Sleep tight and sweet dreams. See you tomorrow.

kgirl41

Hi everyone! Checking in on Day 14! I've made it 2 weeks and am very proud of myself for it. Seriously wasn't sure I could find a way to stop drinking. A big thanks to this group, Dee and Venus for getting me out of the forest. I know I have to continue this ODAAT but my mind is in the right place now to do that.
Last time I drank, two weeks ago, was a day very similar to today. I have a short day at work then I am taking my son to the mall for lunch and "retail therapy". Last time we did this I started having intense cravings on the way home and was unable to conquer them. I dropped him off and off I went to buy booze.
Well not today satan! Not today!!!
I haven't been getting out here as much as I would like and it looks like I have some catch up to do on posts. But all in all it looks like people are doing well!
My plan for tonight is to work on my granddaughters scrapbook and I am really excited to pull my scrapbooking supplies out. It's been too long.
Have a wonderful day team. Be sure to have a plan in place for the weekend cravings....even if you feel well I promise your AV is lurking around a corner somewhere waiting for a time to strike! Be ready! If I get a craving today my plan is to 1. Time it (it will pass!) 2. Reach out to a friend 3. Post here 4. Eat food, drink something non-alcoholic
What's everyone else's plans for fighting the cravings should they strike today?

kgirl41

Charon - I looked for a local SMART meeting and unfortunately the closest one is 45 min away. I did look into becoming a facilitator and starting a local meeting here but I'm not sure I'm ready for that. I did file it back in my "things to consider" ideas!

Finalround

My oldest had developed a major problem with marijuana at 14-15. It was difficult for us all as he spiraled out of control and became a different person. The entire family rallied around us and we (I especially) poured our hearts and souls into getting him better. It was a very hard time but proud to say we got thru. And my son has learned some valuable life lessons and is an amazing young man.

I'm so sorry you have to face this Kinsey, but it sounds like you e got great support around you. Love.

Finalround

Trying to catch up on all your posts. Great to see so many posting.

I'm going camping tonight for the weekend with my sons. Very happy about it and they are both excited. I will be out of service until Sunday but will continue to read your posts when I can.

Jewel72

2 weeks for me today also. Congrats KGirl...we’re back at this.

FR, Have a wonderful weekend with your sons!

I know I’m posting a lot (hope you all don’t mind), but it’s helping my brain to stay connected here in these early days. I am so thankful to be back in the light. I, also, didn’t know how I was going to stop drinking this round. But between SR and meeting with my Pastor, I’ve finally got out of the black hole.

Today should be a fun Friday. Doing some baking with daughter, going for a morning run, and taking the kids to the pool later. We have had the best summer weather lately in the Midwest. Just beautiful. When it’s this nice, I have to be outside. Probably pizza/movie night for PM.

Tomorrow I have a wedding to attend, but I’m not worried. I’ll have my daughters with me; plus, my Pastor and his wife will be attending also. I’ve asked them to keep an eye on me to make sure I’m behaving.: (Thats me dancing with no wine in my system

Have a great day all and stay sober. It is the better way.

venuscat

Just fantastic Quitnow. s

venuscat

Such beautiful posts, such wonderful milestones, and yes, SO MANY runners.

Errrr, not me, not ever. I don't even like running on the treadmill.....I walk.

Seriously, you all make my heart sing.

venuscat

♥♥


(Gosh I wish we didn't lose caps when we quote.....not always though....must find out about that.).

GreenDog

Jewel72

Do you like sweets, Greendog? How about favorite candy? I normally try to stay away from sugars, but the first week I allowed myself gummy bears and Jelly Bellys (my two absolute favorites!) It did seem to help ease the cravings and gave me that “treat” I was looking for. I can’t keep that stuff around though especially those little jelly beans....they are so addicting!

Charon

You could always try the on-line meetings. Only need to register (make up username, pick password, add a wee bit of info), log on and pick a meeting. I started doing on-line meetings last week on days when a face-to-face meeting wasn't available.

I drive about 45 minutes to all three of my face-to-face meetings (mon, wed, thur). Considering the amount of time I spent drinking or buzzed it's actually using less time - - and I'm doing something good for myself.

First, the family crisis meeting yesterday went wonderfully. Mirko is an absolute miracle. He set the purpose and kept everything perfectly on track. At the end every thing was resolved (though there is surely more work to do). Apologies were made, wrongs were admitted, my Daughters real grievences were acknowledged, intentions (or more correctly - non-intentions) were clarified and, as Mirko put it, she was witnessed. She accepted some blueberries from my wife & me, gave my Son a hug, said goodby to me (no hug - hope that will come in time) and didn't say goodby to my wife (hope that will come too). I'm still feeling a bit sad, but the threat of never seeing or talking to my Daughter isn't weighing on me. In time I hope that things will return to normal and thet finally she can move past her self-hate, lack of confidence, and all the other things that she has kept inside eating at her.

Had a good SMART meeting last night in Albany. I will be switching to the wednesday Saratoga meeting from the Rensaelear meeting. Closer and they have a facilitator to keep things on track and SMART oriented.

Going to a mass for Sister Monica tomorrow morning, then off to New Hampshire to help with Old Home Day. My brother-in-law is in the ICU with atrial fibrilation and it's not yet under control. My wife goes up to help each year and this year I'm going to be going and pitching in as well to help fill in for my brother-in-law. I'll head home early Monday morning and, since I go right through Brattleboro on my way home, I'll stop and snorkel the West River - something I did every day on my first stay there. I might even dive a small tank with my metal detector under the cliff where people jump into the water. See what I can find.

Today I plan to weed a flower garden, rake the clippings, and test the motor on my row boat. Then I need to pack. I'll be away tomorrow and sunday but will try to check in from my netbook.

Everyone have a happy, safe, and sober weekend.

GreenDog

Jewel72

Quiet in here today. I hope everyone is busy and sober.

I was beginning to feel a little melancholy this afternoon. Very minor romantic thoughts about wine. Then I drove by a liquor store and saw guys coming out with boxes of booze. Thankfully, instead of envy, I felt relieved that I wouldn’t be waking up with a hangover tomorrow. Playing the tape to the end.

Onward....

Karen, Thinking of you.

venuscat

I am also thinking of Karen. A bit worried. Come on Karen darling....come talk to us. No matter what is happening. s

Those boxes of beer and such......they could well be for a whole ton of people for the entire weekend.....normies......not planning on drinking the whole box by themselves. That always make me play the tape through.....

Fridays are hard. Here for every one of you....let's do this together. s