Class of January Support Thread 2018 Part 9
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Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 984
Hi All, just checking in.
Palmer: I hope your last day in the current role is enjoyable and that you manage to close out this chapter on your terms as you look forward to the exciting next step!
NL: Thinking of you and your family.
Scotty, Dee: Hope all is well with you both - Happy Friday!
Palmer: I hope your last day in the current role is enjoyable and that you manage to close out this chapter on your terms as you look forward to the exciting next step!
NL: Thinking of you and your family.
Scotty, Dee: Hope all is well with you both - Happy Friday!
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Join Date: Dec 2017
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Hi all, so sorry for the radio silence! Yesterday was the last day in my job, which was emotional and kind of put me in a fog for the entire day, while I ate complete junk, aimlessly wandered from one task to another, and read very kind messages from my colleagues all while feeling too drained to respond. I really underestimated my level of emotional attachment to the people I've spent almost two decades (!!!) with, but ultimately I feel hopeful that I will adjust to the change and be able to challenge myself in interesting and rewarding ways. I also named a different co-lead for this project, who is the polar opposite of the other person who gave me so much grief - I think she will do a good job of keeping us on track in meeting our deliverables, while not making things all about her, if that makes sense? I do know that I need to be able to move past the other woman's disapproval and hurt feelings, even as I know she is probably poisoning the well by sharing her negative thoughts with other members of our team. Ultimately, this will only last another 3 months, so I need to remember that and focus on the bigger picture of my new job.
NL, how are you holding up? I've been thinking a lot about you and your family, and I really hope that the return to routine has been a good thing for everyone involved, even if it just gives you a temporary distraction while you continue to provide emotional support to your parents.
NC, I hope work isn't too crazy, and that you're enjoying the academic environment that comes along with the masters program!!!
Hi to Dee, Scotty, and anyone else who might be around!
NL, how are you holding up? I've been thinking a lot about you and your family, and I really hope that the return to routine has been a good thing for everyone involved, even if it just gives you a temporary distraction while you continue to provide emotional support to your parents.
NC, I hope work isn't too crazy, and that you're enjoying the academic environment that comes along with the masters program!!!
Hi to Dee, Scotty, and anyone else who might be around!
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Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 984
Hi Class,
Palmer: Congratulations on closing out such a significant chapter of your life. I can only imagine the mixed emotions you must have about this process - in a way, I think it’s quite nice that you will at least have the opportunity to continue working on the final project with colleagues from your former division as you move forward and get to grips with the new role, as it offers a phased transition of sorts. It sounds as though you handled the co-lead situation with as much grace and respect as affordable and that ultimately you acted in the capacity of a great project manager in having the hard conversations and not shying away from the uncomfortable realities, making the right decisions for the success of the project. I’m sure the wider team and your executives will understand and admire those actions, even if your ex co-lead attempts to embitter them alongside her for a while.
NL: Also thinking of you and your family and sending best wishes for healing.
Hi to Dee, Scotty and anyone else!
Palmer: Congratulations on closing out such a significant chapter of your life. I can only imagine the mixed emotions you must have about this process - in a way, I think it’s quite nice that you will at least have the opportunity to continue working on the final project with colleagues from your former division as you move forward and get to grips with the new role, as it offers a phased transition of sorts. It sounds as though you handled the co-lead situation with as much grace and respect as affordable and that ultimately you acted in the capacity of a great project manager in having the hard conversations and not shying away from the uncomfortable realities, making the right decisions for the success of the project. I’m sure the wider team and your executives will understand and admire those actions, even if your ex co-lead attempts to embitter them alongside her for a while.
NL: Also thinking of you and your family and sending best wishes for healing.
Hi to Dee, Scotty and anyone else!
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Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 2,912
Hey there. I’m here and doing what I call Nokay. Which is okay, not-okay at the same time. I am still in a definite fog. I think part of it was that on top of everything else I got a nasty stomach bug (as did my mom, sister and brother in law) that has gotten better overall but still leaves me very tired and out of it—and my stomach still really hurts. I don’t think it’s one of those things where it’s actually depression but manifesting itself physically since it was very clearly a contagious bug but who really knows. I am definitely very sad and I don’t deny that. I don’t really know the difference between being sad and being depressed to be quite honest. But I think I’m just sad. And who wouldn’t be?
Scotty, that sounds like it is still tough (the PTSD-like symptoms), even if you have support. Hope you are still doing ok.
NC, I want to check out that show. I actually watched some TV for the first time in a long time yesterday. I always used to like to watch Intervention. It started when I was drinking — mainly because it made me feel like I wasn’t too bad off. But now that I am sober and have lost someone to an opioid related overdose, I don’t know if I can ever do it again. I hope you all are able to put something in place at your business so you can focus on your Masters program. I’m worried it will be tough if you try to do everything you were doing before AND add the masters, since it was tough to do just the business even without the program. I know you’ll eventually figure out a solution.
PS sorry for the rocky end with the co-lead but I like what NC said about the project being a good bridge with your old job as you start the new one (tomorrow?).
I guess I’m going to try and exercise. Obviously I don’t feel super motivated but I did just a tiny bit of yoga yesterday and that helped so I guess I’ll just force myself to do at least something and see how that feels.
Hope everyone has a good week.
Scotty, that sounds like it is still tough (the PTSD-like symptoms), even if you have support. Hope you are still doing ok.
NC, I want to check out that show. I actually watched some TV for the first time in a long time yesterday. I always used to like to watch Intervention. It started when I was drinking — mainly because it made me feel like I wasn’t too bad off. But now that I am sober and have lost someone to an opioid related overdose, I don’t know if I can ever do it again. I hope you all are able to put something in place at your business so you can focus on your Masters program. I’m worried it will be tough if you try to do everything you were doing before AND add the masters, since it was tough to do just the business even without the program. I know you’ll eventually figure out a solution.
PS sorry for the rocky end with the co-lead but I like what NC said about the project being a good bridge with your old job as you start the new one (tomorrow?).
I guess I’m going to try and exercise. Obviously I don’t feel super motivated but I did just a tiny bit of yoga yesterday and that helped so I guess I’ll just force myself to do at least something and see how that feels.
Hope everyone has a good week.
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Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 325
Just dashing in and have caught up with everyone’s news. I’m sorry I don’t have time to ‘chat’ properly, but I continue to be amazed at the strength within this group. We’ve all seen significant change and adversity during the last 18 months while making the positive change to stay sober.
I am filled with admiration for the way our group handles things and go us for recognising our respective AVs for what they are at times of stress and pressure.
I am filled with admiration for the way our group handles things and go us for recognising our respective AVs for what they are at times of stress and pressure.
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Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 984
Hi Class,
NL: I hope that you have recovered from that nasty bug. Whatever the cause, it sounds awful and not that it's ever opportune to fall ill, but this is certainly a time where you could really do with a break. I can't imagine what you and your family are going through and I'm sure that there is an element of surrealness surrounding moments where the overwhelming reality of what has happened is almost too much to bear. We are absolutely here for you to listen and support as you navigate through this.
Scotty: I echo that sentiment one hundred percent - the strength, compassion and grace with which each of you here have overcome challenges over the past year and a half + has inspired me greatly and is what often keeps me focused and on track in my own life / with my own sobriety. Thank you all dearly for that.
Dee: I hope you have / are having a great week also!
Palmer: I hope that the first week in the new role is going well as you get to grips with the new and learn to balance it alongside the ongoing project!
Take care everyone.
NL: I hope that you have recovered from that nasty bug. Whatever the cause, it sounds awful and not that it's ever opportune to fall ill, but this is certainly a time where you could really do with a break. I can't imagine what you and your family are going through and I'm sure that there is an element of surrealness surrounding moments where the overwhelming reality of what has happened is almost too much to bear. We are absolutely here for you to listen and support as you navigate through this.
Scotty: I echo that sentiment one hundred percent - the strength, compassion and grace with which each of you here have overcome challenges over the past year and a half + has inspired me greatly and is what often keeps me focused and on track in my own life / with my own sobriety. Thank you all dearly for that.
Dee: I hope you have / are having a great week also!
Palmer: I hope that the first week in the new role is going well as you get to grips with the new and learn to balance it alongside the ongoing project!
Take care everyone.
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Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 2,912
Thanks, y’all. I am much better from the stomach bug — and feeling much better overall. I don’t know if some of it is just that I’m not back home so it’s not front and center in my mind but I just feel kind of okay. Still very sad but ok to laugh and be kind of normal. We’ll see. Part of me feels like I could be unconsciously just not feeling it but I’m not sure how to undo that if it’s unconscious. Hard to explain.
Hope all are well out there.
Hope all are well out there.
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Join Date: Dec 2017
Location: United States
Posts: 2,547
Hi all! Checking in after a long (but positive!) week at my new job. It was really nice to finally start, meet everyone, get settled, and start thinking about what I actually need to focus on. It's been a bit tough to stay involved in my previous project, which is not directly related to my previous job or this one - it's a seperate project team that I'm managing which is across our organization (kind of hard to explain, obviously!) Anyway, the pressure is on, but change is good. 
I was excited to note that I hit 22 months sober this week, yay!
NL, I'm glad to hear you're feeling more like yourself, even if it's a case of compartmentalizing as you said. And I was completely with you on watching "Intervention," it definitely made me feel like my drinking wasn't that bad (yeah right) - but I have zero interest in watching it now. I can only imagine how you must feel, having the tragedy of an overdose to compound the horror that these poor folks are living in. I've been thinking of you and your family.
NC, how is the work-study balance going with the masters? I really hope you're able to find time to ride your horse and do yoga, too!
Scotty, that's such an important point about what we've collectively dealt with over the past 1-2 years. Can you imagine describing it all to "drunk us?" There is no way I would have believed that it would have been actually easier to deal with problems alcohol free!
Hi to Dee and anyone else out there!!!
I was excited to note that I hit 22 months sober this week, yay!NL, I'm glad to hear you're feeling more like yourself, even if it's a case of compartmentalizing as you said. And I was completely with you on watching "Intervention," it definitely made me feel like my drinking wasn't that bad (yeah right) - but I have zero interest in watching it now. I can only imagine how you must feel, having the tragedy of an overdose to compound the horror that these poor folks are living in. I've been thinking of you and your family.
NC, how is the work-study balance going with the masters? I really hope you're able to find time to ride your horse and do yoga, too!
Scotty, that's such an important point about what we've collectively dealt with over the past 1-2 years. Can you imagine describing it all to "drunk us?" There is no way I would have believed that it would have been actually easier to deal with problems alcohol free!
Hi to Dee and anyone else out there!!!
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Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 2,912
Congrats PS! If it helps any I’ve already been rounding up heftily and saying I’ve been sober for “almost 2 years”. Ha! I’m not even to 21 months. Glad to hear the new gig is good—maybe minus the project that doesn’t really fit in the mix.
Well hi to everyone. I woke up quite early (4:30) but I’m not actually feeling awake! My brain isn’t working to form thoughts yet.
Good luck to everyone for a successful week!
Well hi to everyone. I woke up quite early (4:30) but I’m not actually feeling awake! My brain isn’t working to form thoughts yet.
Good luck to everyone for a successful week!
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Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 984
Hi Class,
Palmer: Congrats on 21 months. Wow - imagine what our day one selves would think? So great. I hope you're settling well into the new role well (as it seems you are!) and that managing the other project gets easier as you learn to straddle the two roles!
NL: I'm glad that things are 'normalising' a little and I'm sure things still feel weird and surreal at times. I hope you've been able to fit in workouts again and that they are helping for mental space. We're here for you whenever you need.
Hi Dee!!
Things are going relatively well here - so far I'm managing to juggle college, work and horse. Yoga has gone by the wayside somewhat but that's due in large part to big disruption at the studio and all the great teachers leaving / changing the schedule and classes etc. I have been struggling a bit with my first assignment as it is very heavy on the statistics with which I am out of practise (and also it was never something I've had much exposure to or aptitude for to begin with!), but I'll get there. I was supposed to be heading away for the weekend for a friend's birthday but it is a five hour drive each way for the sake of one night and I honestly just don't have the bandwidth so I've decided to cancel. Feeling strange today - very irritable and angry for no real reason. Hopefully I can try to change my mood - maybe I need to get back to yoga!
Have a great day all.
Palmer: Congrats on 21 months. Wow - imagine what our day one selves would think? So great. I hope you're settling well into the new role well (as it seems you are!) and that managing the other project gets easier as you learn to straddle the two roles!
NL: I'm glad that things are 'normalising' a little and I'm sure things still feel weird and surreal at times. I hope you've been able to fit in workouts again and that they are helping for mental space. We're here for you whenever you need.
Hi Dee!!
Things are going relatively well here - so far I'm managing to juggle college, work and horse. Yoga has gone by the wayside somewhat but that's due in large part to big disruption at the studio and all the great teachers leaving / changing the schedule and classes etc. I have been struggling a bit with my first assignment as it is very heavy on the statistics with which I am out of practise (and also it was never something I've had much exposure to or aptitude for to begin with!), but I'll get there. I was supposed to be heading away for the weekend for a friend's birthday but it is a five hour drive each way for the sake of one night and I honestly just don't have the bandwidth so I've decided to cancel. Feeling strange today - very irritable and angry for no real reason. Hopefully I can try to change my mood - maybe I need to get back to yoga!
Have a great day all.
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Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 984
Hi Class,
Thankfully the headache and irritability from yesterday have dissipated. Hubby and I went for a nice early-bird meal after work yesterday evening and it helped to lift my mood and take my mind off work/college. I get to go riding tonight after work so that will help get me out of my head a little, too. I had a 'slip' dream last night and woke up feeling pretty anxious - I definitely don't want to drink, but have a feeling it's probably down to latent feelings of stress, so will keep an eye on that. i was supposed to try out the new yoga class before work but snoozed my alarm instead - regret it now!
Sorry, this wasn't supposed to be such a moany post, I think I'm just rambling.
Hope everyone is having a great week so far - take care.
Thankfully the headache and irritability from yesterday have dissipated. Hubby and I went for a nice early-bird meal after work yesterday evening and it helped to lift my mood and take my mind off work/college. I get to go riding tonight after work so that will help get me out of my head a little, too. I had a 'slip' dream last night and woke up feeling pretty anxious - I definitely don't want to drink, but have a feeling it's probably down to latent feelings of stress, so will keep an eye on that. i was supposed to try out the new yoga class before work but snoozed my alarm instead - regret it now!
Sorry, this wasn't supposed to be such a moany post, I think I'm just rambling.
Hope everyone is having a great week so far - take care.
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Join Date: Dec 2017
Location: United States
Posts: 2,547
Hi all! NC, it really sounds like you have a LOT going on, adding school into the mix when there wasn't a lot of extra room to begin with! It seems like a mark of longer-term sobriety to automatically include riding and yoga at the top of your list, as a way to actually take action to enjoy your days a bit and manage stress, rather than just passively using alcohol as a default coping mechanism, which then actually creates stress, and the cycle continues! How has work been, with the personnel issues, etc?
My second week at work was a lot more challenging than the first. I have a new role which didn't exist in the org previously, and it is the one challenge that everyone is focused on right now - so there is a lot of, "oh, we've been waiting for you! Here's a huge data dump and we look forward to you impressing the S%$& out of us immediately!"
Of course, it's not actually like that, just feels that way, and I have a big presentation tomorrow for my other project that my new bosses don't necesssarily want me to focus too much time on, if that makes sense. Anyway, SR has always been a great place for me to vent to my favorite little group of sober people - I have no doubt that these are simply growing pains which will pass. And I'm definitely not bored! 
Numblady, Scotty, Dee, (Sunflower? Milly? Chase?) I hope everyone is doing well and will check in in due time!
My second week at work was a lot more challenging than the first. I have a new role which didn't exist in the org previously, and it is the one challenge that everyone is focused on right now - so there is a lot of, "oh, we've been waiting for you! Here's a huge data dump and we look forward to you impressing the S%$& out of us immediately!"
Of course, it's not actually like that, just feels that way, and I have a big presentation tomorrow for my other project that my new bosses don't necesssarily want me to focus too much time on, if that makes sense. Anyway, SR has always been a great place for me to vent to my favorite little group of sober people - I have no doubt that these are simply growing pains which will pass. And I'm definitely not bored! Numblady, Scotty, Dee, (Sunflower? Milly? Chase?) I hope everyone is doing well and will check in in due time!
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Join Date: Jan 2018
Posts: 984
Hi Class,
NL: I hope you're keeping well. Saw your sweet post on the gratitude thread re: your camping trip and it sounds like it was a wonderful family experience. I'm so happy you had that quality time.
Palmer: It sounds like you're under quite a bit of pressure at work and that you're being pulled in different directions a little. I hope you can find the space to establish the new role as you see fit and develop an effective strategy for managing the various balls you are juggling in a way that leaves you feeling productive and fulfilled. I hope the presentation went well - I'm sure it did! I have no doubt you will exceed expectations and rise to the challenge. I completely agree with you regarding the sober-reflex of trying to implement an adaptive strategy to mitigate stress (a la yoga, sport, etc.) whereas in the past we would all have simply reached for the bottle to numb it out. I was contemplating this a little over the weekend and I definitely notice that as sobriety progresses, I seem to be trying to fill up as much time as possible - something I think we can all be a little guilty of. I think this is partly due to our personalities and trying to 'make the most of sobriety' or to be as productive as possible. This year is hectic between work and school etc., however I was thinking of trying to make a goal for next year, once the masters is complete, to take a couple months of trying to do as little as possible and see how that goes. I don't mean just sit around, but rather budgeting for space in my calendar rather than packing out the days/weeks with projects etc. as I have a feeling there is something behind that motivation to always be 'achieving'. We'll see how that pans out, but just a thought.
Hope everyone is doing great.
NL: I hope you're keeping well. Saw your sweet post on the gratitude thread re: your camping trip and it sounds like it was a wonderful family experience. I'm so happy you had that quality time.
Palmer: It sounds like you're under quite a bit of pressure at work and that you're being pulled in different directions a little. I hope you can find the space to establish the new role as you see fit and develop an effective strategy for managing the various balls you are juggling in a way that leaves you feeling productive and fulfilled. I hope the presentation went well - I'm sure it did! I have no doubt you will exceed expectations and rise to the challenge. I completely agree with you regarding the sober-reflex of trying to implement an adaptive strategy to mitigate stress (a la yoga, sport, etc.) whereas in the past we would all have simply reached for the bottle to numb it out. I was contemplating this a little over the weekend and I definitely notice that as sobriety progresses, I seem to be trying to fill up as much time as possible - something I think we can all be a little guilty of. I think this is partly due to our personalities and trying to 'make the most of sobriety' or to be as productive as possible. This year is hectic between work and school etc., however I was thinking of trying to make a goal for next year, once the masters is complete, to take a couple months of trying to do as little as possible and see how that goes. I don't mean just sit around, but rather budgeting for space in my calendar rather than packing out the days/weeks with projects etc. as I have a feeling there is something behind that motivation to always be 'achieving'. We'll see how that pans out, but just a thought.
Hope everyone is doing great.
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