snitch

Hey April's!

I am in the April 2018 class. So nearly a year sober which is a miracle.

I had tried many, many, many times to get sober. What was different this time??

1. Conceding to my innermost self that I am an alcoholic and I lose all power of control as soon I have taken that FIRST drink. Staying away from that first drink is VITAL.
2. Surrender! I surrendered to the fact that alcohol had me beat. When I drank it became my master. It was in total control.
3. Acceptance. Accepting that for some, alcohol is ok to drink.. For ME, it is deadly. I have an allergy. One drink sets off a craving for more that is never satisfied. One drink has the potential to kill. That is just MY reality. MY truth. And I accept that today. I have moments of self pity. Poor me, I cant drink like others. I write a gratitude list in these moments. What I have NOW because I am NOT drinking. The list is long!
4. Honesty. I had to get honest with the people I was closest to. My family. My partner. My friends. I had to tell them I am alcoholic! And I have to stop drinking. This is life or death. I couldn't pretend anymore that I was trying to quit for health. Or for weight I was quitting because I have a progressive, killer disease. The support I got was amazing. I am not sure I could have done it alone.
5. Staying away from that first drink and living sober....ahhh! If only it was as easy as just not picking up that first drink! Simple yes, easy no. For me I go to AA. AA has saved my life and is now showing me a way to live my life sober. The obsession to drink in the early days/months is strong. Powerful. How I got through the cravings? I prayed. Please God do not let me pick up a drink! I ate. Candy candy and more candy! I called another alcoholic. I went to a meeting. I posted on SR. I watched Netflix. I read recovery literature and also watched recovery documentaries..j learned about alcoholism. I went to bed early. Some days I wanted to crawl out of my skin the desire to drink was so strong. But I didn't pick up no matter what! Make getting your head on your pillow sober at night your main goal. Don't think about the future. Just take care of the next 24 hours

11 months later and my life has changed so much. Today I am starting to feel good about myself. I haven't done anything that I regret or I am ashamed of. I am a good daughter, sister and friend and most of all a sober and present mummy. I am stating to get all the things I never ever had when I was drinking. Peace of mind, serenity, happiness, and love. Sobriety is a beautiful gift and I never ever want to drink again.

You can all do this. If I can you can!!!! ♥️♥️♥️

NicLin

Checking in for my 5th day!!! This is the most I made last time, only last time I didn't have so many tools, especially the support of AA!

Feeling pretty good today, taking day by day but happy to be going to bed sober.

Tinkerbeau

Day 2 for me, hope everyone has a good day, lets all make it through the month sober together. Then the next and next .....

Strawberry18

Day 2 and a very busy day ahead, will check in tonigh

ForeRight

Hi everyone. I'm on day 9. I hope everyone is doing well.

Thank you for the inspiring post, snitch. Its encouraging to hear stories of success and good advice.

I'm trying to check in here at least once a day to make it a habit of keeping me grounded and avoiding complacency. I've gone for stretches before and then I always fall back to thinking my problem wasn't really that bad, I can control my drinking this time and I'll just have a few beers here or there, etc. NOT staying away from that first drink. Inevitably it always comes back to drinking daily and drinking to excess, and I feel terrible about myself.

So -- here I am. I commit to not drinking today.

Sated

Hi all! Day 2 for me. I used to be an athlete, I swam in school and a couple years ago I swam Alcatraz. Today was day 2 back in the pool. I felt stronger than yesterday but I cant believe I let myself get so out of shape. Why is wine more important that that elated feeling of jumping from a perfectly good boat into the dark, cold water in the San Fran bay and swimming to shore?? Wine makes me lazy and unmotivated.

ForeRight

So true! I worked out Saturday, walked the golf course on Sunday, and worked out again last night. Feel great (though I am SORE today). That's a good feeling.

BlueWellies

Good morning everyone. Day 2 for me. I'm going to start working my plan today.

Hope everyone has a great day. Thanks so much for being here.

Jojo1965

Hello Dee and all April friends,

I’m back...again.

Thought I’d slide on in and get settled. It’s always a relief to be back. Now to figure out how to never leave.

Dee74

Welcome Jojo

D

Canuck76

Day 1 here. I had a good stretch in February but couldn't hang on. I had bout of eczema for the month. Intense itchy rashes on my face and legs. The booze helped numb the itching. I got cream from the pharmacy and the eczema has subsided. I was too eager to use it as an excuse to drink. It has been a brutal winter here and have been depressed. I am taking antidepressants again and they are starting to work I think. I am quite isolated and lonely, deal with insomnia. I hate being so miserable all the time...

Dee74

Welcome Canuck

D

Tinkerbeau

Hi hope everyone is ok, and well done of everyone's sober time. Day 3 for me, back to getting up nice and early b4 work which i really enjoy and just one of many things i cant do if i drink. So commiting to not drinking today.

Teetotaler56

Hello everyone! I haven't been to SR in a long time, until the past few days. I'm sorry to say I fell back into old habits and got comfortable there. Now I've grown tired of dealing with the hangovers and sick of living that kind of life. I'm afraid to say never again, but I will say that today I will not drink. Day 2 for me.

Canuck76

Day 2. I hate this cycle of bingeing and sobering up. My life is in shambles so I don't have much incentive to stay sober. already lost everything. I can only try again....

H379

I had a good 74 day stretch when I had a toast and got to day 1 on the 14 of March. Then last night I drank again. Normal drinking per my standards.

I realized even though it was normal drinking, it was not fun compared to the sober time I had. So I am going to start my day one today.

BlueWellies

Sated

Day 3. I had a slight voice in my head yesterday, how a glass of wine would be nice. I acknowledged it, and let it go. It didn't return. I slept ok last night, got to sleep somewhat early and my Fitbit says my Deep Sleep was back to my normal %. But man oh man, it was HARD to get out of bed and into the pool this morning. It didn't help that my fiancé was feeling unmotivated too so we didn't get up real fast. My swim was hard today too, I just felt heavy. I imagine that if I was hungover, I wouldn't have even gone so its a win, even if I didn't go as fast as I did yesterday. On a plus side I get my kids back from their dads house this afternoon! I miss them! I cant wait for them to stop asking me if Im getting wine at the store when we go. Ugh. Happy Wednesday all! Chin up, drink water

ForeRight

Quick check in. A lot of stories of going a long period and then falling back into old habits. I've done that a ton too. I don't know what is worse, the physical feeling of feeling like garbage, or the mental anguish of constantly disappointing yourself and getting sick and tired of being sick and tired. I so much want something different this time around.

Teetotaler56

So with you ForeRight. Let's find ways to quit repeating the same thing again. We can do this!

Let's find things to put in place of the usual drink. In my case, I'm thinking maybe some candy/ice cream, as long as I don't continue it longterm. I'm having a bit of a struggle right now, so I'm heading to the grocery store now for some backup.

Let's rule this day!

PS Also went to the library earlier today to pick up some books.