Class of February 2019 Support Thread Pt 3
Anybody else finding their old insecurities coming back like a freight train? Like, I no longer can think "I acted weird in that conversation last night because I was tipsy" or "I talked too much because I had too much wine" or whatever. Nope, I talk a lot and say things that sometimes make people tilt their heads at me like "Are you ok?" Suddenly remembering all the times I felt like I talked too much as a kid as I was the last person to share in today's morning meeting and had to be reminded of the time and to wrap it up. Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. I'm a talker. Can I become less of a talker? I dunno. Should I? I dunno. Just feeling a bit foolish and marveling at how much I blamed on the drink when, nope, that's me.
If you need me I'll be hiding under my desk today.
If you need me I'll be hiding under my desk today.
I’m a talker too, pupper. Embrace it!
I went to a get together with a bunch of women from my son’s High school hockey team. We get together about once a year - sons are all 24-25 now. Anyway, wine has always been a part of the group. I drank water tonight. Nobody had more than two - I remember having three and wanting more in the past. Lot easier the way I did it tonight.
I went to a get together with a bunch of women from my son’s High school hockey team. We get together about once a year - sons are all 24-25 now. Anyway, wine has always been a part of the group. I drank water tonight. Nobody had more than two - I remember having three and wanting more in the past. Lot easier the way I did it tonight.
Checking in on day 46! It's been a super busy few days. Whew. It looks like it's been slowww in our class this week. I hope that just means everyone is busy......not drinking. I often wonder where all the people that joined our class went?
Gonna catch up on the posts now!
Gonna catch up on the posts now!
Interesting to think about how alcohol made us feel when we first started drinking. That was a really long time ago. Uber interesting that I don't remember much except that.
I always could drink liquids fast. Still do. I can down a bottle of water like it's nothing. That didn't help. I always felt different. I'm not so sure that most people don't feel different from everyone else when they are young. Someone probably just forgot to tell me that. I still feel different. I just chalk that up to being introverted, semi-artistic, and sensitive. I can pretend to be outgoing and social but I am really not. I could live on Walden's pond and be perfectly happy if I could get away with it. As long as I have the internet.
Just plugging along here. Happy to not be drinking for sure.
Have a great day or night!
xoxo
I always could drink liquids fast. Still do. I can down a bottle of water like it's nothing. That didn't help. I always felt different. I'm not so sure that most people don't feel different from everyone else when they are young. Someone probably just forgot to tell me that. I still feel different. I just chalk that up to being introverted, semi-artistic, and sensitive. I can pretend to be outgoing and social but I am really not. I could live on Walden's pond and be perfectly happy if I could get away with it. As long as I have the internet.
Just plugging along here. Happy to not be drinking for sure.
Have a great day or night!
xoxo
I always felt different too and could live on a deserted as long as I have my kids and pets!
I hope everyone is doing well this evening (or whatever time it is where you are!) Just checking in at... My app says 45 days! That's exciting!
I realized today that I feel good about my evenings now. I used to dread them because I knew I was going to drink, and then I dreaded them because I knew I couldn't drink. But lately, I haven't been thinking about the drinking at all, and it's lifted the doomy feelings. Sometimes I find myself realizing that I can be happy, and that I can process and deal with how I'm feeling when I'm not. I'm very grateful!
I realized today that I feel good about my evenings now. I used to dread them because I knew I was going to drink, and then I dreaded them because I knew I couldn't drink. But lately, I haven't been thinking about the drinking at all, and it's lifted the doomy feelings. Sometimes I find myself realizing that I can be happy, and that I can process and deal with how I'm feeling when I'm not. I'm very grateful!
I hope so!
I wonder why being sick makes me want to drink. I mean I feel like crap with a bad sinus infection, and the CVS has all this stuff out on displays on the way to the pharmacy and yeah. The thoughts start. The stuff isn’t comfort food - geez. Of course ( 😊 ) I walked right by. Yay.
I’ve been invited out to a girls night Thursday with my old hockey-mom friends. Haven’t seen them since last summer. I think I’ll be ok (I was always good in public) and I wouldn’t be able to drink on the antibiotics and steroid anyway. But I will hone my sober skills between now and then because I really want to see them. They aren’t the types to urge wine on me if I stick to water.
33 days for me!! I made a month!! Alert the press!!!
I'm trying to think of all the things that have improved. I am not coming up with anything out of the ordinary. I still get depressed. I still have stress. I still feel a little lost BUT...I feel like just a normal person now. All of the above are just life and I do feel like I can handle life better without drinking so big plus on that one. No pink cloud for me. I think because this is round 3 on quitting for good I used up all my clouds. I just get the feeling of this is what I am supposed to do. Be a grown-up and handle life.
It just feels realistic to me now. This is how I have to live. Without alcohol. So suck it up and do it. I want to do it. I see it's better. I just am not feeling too giddy about it. Probably part of the depression so I just take what I can get. It's still better than it was.
Have a good one!
xoxo
I'm trying to think of all the things that have improved. I am not coming up with anything out of the ordinary. I still get depressed. I still have stress. I still feel a little lost BUT...I feel like just a normal person now. All of the above are just life and I do feel like I can handle life better without drinking so big plus on that one. No pink cloud for me. I think because this is round 3 on quitting for good I used up all my clouds. I just get the feeling of this is what I am supposed to do. Be a grown-up and handle life.
It just feels realistic to me now. This is how I have to live. Without alcohol. So suck it up and do it. I want to do it. I see it's better. I just am not feeling too giddy about it. Probably part of the depression so I just take what I can get. It's still better than it was.
Have a good one!
xoxo
Congrats on a month 360! Don't worry no pink clouds for me either! I'm waiting though....
Do you go to AA? I can't remember...
But Addy, it's all TRUE...guess that's the sad part...lol. Just came back from getting my nails done (FINALLY) and I have a super busy week ahead. So, HAD to get them done today. Hubby thinks it's a "relaxing time"...I think it's a pain in the a**...lol....perception is an interesting thing!
AND Addy, as for being sick, making you want to drink, I drank through all of my colds, flu, et. so I WOULDN'T FEEL IT...and I didn't! It wasn't until I got sober (previously) that I felt the real symptoms...hang in there...they will pass....
Anybody else finding their old insecurities coming back like a freight train? Like, I no longer can think "I acted weird in that conversation last night because I was tipsy" or "I talked too much because I had too much wine" or whatever. Nope, I talk a lot and say things that sometimes make people tilt their heads at me like "Are you ok?" Suddenly remembering all the times I felt like I talked too much as a kid as I was the last person to share in today's morning meeting and had to be reminded of the time and to wrap it up. Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. I'm a talker. Can I become less of a talker? I dunno. Should I? I dunno. Just feeling a bit foolish and marveling at how much I blamed on the drink when, nope, that's me.
If you need me I'll be hiding under my desk today.
If you need me I'll be hiding under my desk today.
"What other people think of you is none of your business".
"people aren't thinking about you as much as you think they are."
Those things help too. I think anxiety in early sobriety is very common. Mine has been BAD! I've been told it will get better the longer I'm sober.
But Addy, it's all TRUE...guess that's the sad part...lol. Just came back from getting my nails done (FINALLY) and I have a super busy week ahead. So, HAD to get them done today. Hubby thinks it's a "relaxing time"...I think it's a pain in the a**...lol....perception is an interesting thing!
I just do my own nails now.
It wasn't ME that said being sick makes me want to drink. Actually being sick makes me NOT want to.drink. Thank goodness!
Hi all. Checking in on day 54 for me. It seems so long yet so short at the same time. Still riding the waves of emotions & taking note of how they make me feel and why. One thing I’ve noticed lately is that I will randomly have at least one memory from childhood to 10 years ago that I had completely forgotten about. Good and bad. Just pop in my head. Out of nowhere. It’s like my brain has a flickering switch that’s just trying to work again! I know this is a good thing, but have to remind myself of that when the bad things pop in.
Good to hear most everyone is still doing well. I check here daily. I just don’t feel like I have much to offer most of the time. I am not a talker! Lol
Usually get the feeling that no one wants to hear what I have to say. That’s deep rooted & probably why I was a blabber mouth when drunk. Oye!
Good to hear most everyone is still doing well. I check here daily. I just don’t feel like I have much to offer most of the time. I am not a talker! Lol
Usually get the feeling that no one wants to hear what I have to say. That’s deep rooted & probably why I was a blabber mouth when drunk. Oye!
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