Class of February 2019 Support Thread Pt 2
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
Originally Posted by JamesSquire 
Speaking of time zones, how does it work when both Dee and I thank Canguy, today. Dee's 'Thank You' says yesterday? 
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D
Duck Duck Goose!
Join Date: Jan 2019
Posts: 325
Glad to see folks active while I was snoozing!
I’m going to hit the ice rink this morning. I have a big competition in April and am so behind in my training. (Thanks alcohol). Glad to not be hungover as I head out!
I’m going to hit the ice rink this morning. I have a big competition in April and am so behind in my training. (Thanks alcohol). Glad to not be hungover as I head out!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2019
Posts: 69
Good morning all,
Feeling tired today, Day 5. But all in all okay. Heading to a meeting in an hour.
Going to face calling my father later today who I pissed off earlier this week when I lost control. I’m dreading it but I also am tired of feeling the burden of guilt in not having apologized.
Hope everyone is doing well. I think it’s so wonderful how much I can learn from everyone here. I’m still lacking major motivation and energy, but I’m hoping that’s just one of the early day symptoms.
Have a wonderful day/night... wherever you are! I’m near NYC.
Feeling tired today, Day 5. But all in all okay. Heading to a meeting in an hour.
Going to face calling my father later today who I pissed off earlier this week when I lost control. I’m dreading it but I also am tired of feeling the burden of guilt in not having apologized.
Hope everyone is doing well. I think it’s so wonderful how much I can learn from everyone here. I’m still lacking major motivation and energy, but I’m hoping that’s just one of the early day symptoms.
Have a wonderful day/night... wherever you are! I’m near NYC.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 1,443
Morning Groundhogs! Had a great day with hubby yesterday! I LOVE looking around in thrift stores...my husband, of course, hates any kind of "shopping". He always says "Women shop. Men buy." BUT yesterday he went looking around with me. It was great! He even got a couple of flannel shirts....I got a pair of tennis shoes, that are "like new" for $4.50! I had a blast! Saw a great pair of boots...wish I had bought them too! Then we actually did some "mall shopping" and we were going to go to the movies, but we decided to have a "lunner" instead (That's what we call it when we eat between lunch and dinner). All with NO ALCOHOL. I heard the wine calling my name in the restaurant, I must admit, but I ordered just a water with lemon, IMMEDIATELY upon being seated! Whew....definitely a trigger there, and I SO know better than to go "out" in early sobriety, but I made it! One thing I have learned is that it is impt. to find an alternative to drink, rather than alcohol. When I first got sober, I drank a lot of Snapple. Then I moved on to iced tea. Doc says iced tea is not good for me (kidney stones), so now I am drinking water with a splash of cranberry juice when I'm home. Water with lemon when I'm out and about. Addy, I used to keep candy around too, but my husband has SUCH a sweet tooth that it would all be gone when I wanted it....keeping some in the car is a good idea 
I woke up early today....restless night. Today, I am going for my walk and then I'm not sure...I have a lot I COULD do, but I'm tired, and so I am going to pick at least one thing to do today (probably bills...ugh!), or I may just do my walk and veg. for the day...lol.
I DO like cooking, as well, but not sure whether or not I'll get into it today. If it warms up a bit, I may go buy some flowers to plant....who knows??? But, whatever I do, I'll be sober!! Have a great Saturday everyone!
I woke up early today....restless night. Today, I am going for my walk and then I'm not sure...I have a lot I COULD do, but I'm tired, and so I am going to pick at least one thing to do today (probably bills...ugh!), or I may just do my walk and veg. for the day...lol. I DO like cooking, as well, but not sure whether or not I'll get into it today. If it warms up a bit, I may go buy some flowers to plant....who knows??? But, whatever I do, I'll be sober!! Have a great Saturday everyone!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2019
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 268
Day 15. Just went to an AA meeting. I am still trying to grasp the 'higher power' concept. I hear people talk about their higher power and how it saved them etc. I think more logically and view addiction from a scientific standpoint. For example, I have taken interest in how the brain is wired in people with addiction. It is thought many alcoholics have a lesser amount of dopamine receptors. Brain scans demonstrate this (watched a documentary about this the other day).
That being said, I may never buy into the spiritual aspect of AA, but I do benefit from it and it keeps me sober.
That being said, I may never buy into the spiritual aspect of AA, but I do benefit from it and it keeps me sober.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 617
Oh Foiegras that sounds amazing! Have a great time.
Canuck76 one thing that helped me was this:
"Step one in its entirety is admission that once I start drinking, I lose power, control, and choice to stop.
The in manageability has to do with once I put down the drink, I cannot "manage" my decision to stay stopped."
And the defense against that is relying on something greater than myself to stop doing this.
I understand what you mean I like reading about the cognitive workings as well. But I realize that I always end up going out again so I'm ready to rely on a higher power to stop doing that.
Feeling a bit better today. My head doesn't feel like its discombobulated from my body. Its a wonderful feeling.
Have a great day everyone be back on later.
Canuck76 one thing that helped me was this:
"Step one in its entirety is admission that once I start drinking, I lose power, control, and choice to stop.
The in manageability has to do with once I put down the drink, I cannot "manage" my decision to stay stopped."
And the defense against that is relying on something greater than myself to stop doing this.
I understand what you mean I like reading about the cognitive workings as well. But I realize that I always end up going out again so I'm ready to rely on a higher power to stop doing that.
Feeling a bit better today. My head doesn't feel like its discombobulated from my body. Its a wonderful feeling.
Have a great day everyone be back on later.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2019
Posts: 246
Hi everyone. Finally checking in on day 12. I'm not feeling great today. Not sure why? I just feel tired, lightheaded, brain fog and kinda dizzy today. I'm sure it's still early sobriety stuff. And I am also sure it will continue for a while so I may as week accept it. 
I am giving myself permission to RELAX today! I am gonna just lounge around the house, watch TV and take care of myself. That's ok, right? I don't know about you guys but I always feel guilty when I even sit down let along relax. I need to work on taking better care of myself. I think that was part of why I would go out and get trashed 1-2 per week. I would take care of everyone else (and make sure everyone else was happy) and do nothing for myself.
Imagine water dripping into bucket. If you don't let some of the water out of it once in a while it overflows, right? Well now imagine ME as the bucket of water. I wouldn't empty it (take care of myself) and it would get so full of water that it would finally just over flow and I would say "F it" and get drunk! I needed to just turn off my brain and sit down for a while but I was doing it in an extremely unhealthy way. The next day not only was the bucket still full it was WORSE than it was the before I drank.
Well....I hope everyone is having a good day. I really love this class and all of you.
I am gonna lay down.
I am giving myself permission to RELAX today! I am gonna just lounge around the house, watch TV and take care of myself. That's ok, right? I don't know about you guys but I always feel guilty when I even sit down let along relax. I need to work on taking better care of myself. I think that was part of why I would go out and get trashed 1-2 per week. I would take care of everyone else (and make sure everyone else was happy) and do nothing for myself.
Imagine water dripping into bucket. If you don't let some of the water out of it once in a while it overflows, right? Well now imagine ME as the bucket of water. I wouldn't empty it (take care of myself) and it would get so full of water that it would finally just over flow and I would say "F it" and get drunk! I needed to just turn off my brain and sit down for a while but I was doing it in an extremely unhealthy way. The next day not only was the bucket still full it was WORSE than it was the before I drank.
Well....I hope everyone is having a good day. I really love this class and all of you.
I am gonna lay down.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2019
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 268
Yes, relax Addy. I have so much to do in order to get my life back on track but I never fully addressed my alcoholism. I get sober, but I guess I never was living a life in 'recovery'. Dry drunk is probably appropriate to describe my past efforts.
I am not going to do much until I hit 30 days. You deserve a day to do nothing!
I am not going to do much until I hit 30 days. You deserve a day to do nothing!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2019
Posts: 246
Thank you Canuck! I’m laying down now.
My teenage daughter has been pissy lately & I just finally called her out on it. I think in many ways I have allowed her to treat me like crap because of guilt! I don’t need to continue to punish myself. Anyway...after I told her that it hurts me when she snaps at me & doesn’t appreciate me the first thing that popped in my head was “I want to go get drunk!” Ugh. Confrontation of any type really wakes up my AV! I need to try to avoid it at all costs for now. I’ve locked myself in my room to take a late nap. Not drinking today!
My teenage daughter has been pissy lately & I just finally called her out on it. I think in many ways I have allowed her to treat me like crap because of guilt! I don’t need to continue to punish myself. Anyway...after I told her that it hurts me when she snaps at me & doesn’t appreciate me the first thing that popped in my head was “I want to go get drunk!” Ugh. Confrontation of any type really wakes up my AV! I need to try to avoid it at all costs for now. I’ve locked myself in my room to take a late nap. Not drinking today!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2019
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 268
I have had a few 'thoughts' about drinking. I am bored and overthinking. My mother died before the Christmas holidays and I didn't really grieve because I was drinking for a month. I just want to numb myself but I know the hell I will pay tomorrow morning if I do drink. Playing the tape forward!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2019
Posts: 246
Thanks Canuck. I’m ok. This “feeling” crap sucks! And I’m still having some withdrawal depression. I think I really did a number on my brain and body the last few times I drank. I literally drank so much I think I probably coulda died. I’m sure that did lots of damage.
I’m just gonna hold on tight and stay sober no matter what! Ive got some meetings planned for the weekend so that should help.
I’m so sorry about your mom. :-(
I’m just gonna hold on tight and stay sober no matter what! Ive got some meetings planned for the weekend so that should help.
I’m so sorry about your mom. :-(
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Down Under
Posts: 400
Originally Posted by Addy47
Thanks Canuck. I’m ok. This “feeling” crap sucks! And I’m still having some withdrawal depression. I think I really did a number on my brain and body the last few times I drank. I literally drank so much I think I probably coulda died. I’m sure that did lots of damage.
I’m just gonna hold on tight and stay sober no matter what! Ive got some meetings planned for the weekend so that should help.
I’m so sorry about your mom. :-(
I’m just gonna hold on tight and stay sober no matter what! Ive got some meetings planned for the weekend so that should help.
I’m so sorry about your mom. :-(
Addy, I think you need to get out of the house. Leaving the house for an AA meet seems to help you. Maybe a walk, window shop, a drive to a park, think about YOGA classes, a hobby, ...
There's a Sticky on 'Looking for something to do?'
Fight the thoughts all the way and post here.
JS
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 1,174
Originally Posted by Canuck76
Day 15. Just went to an AA meeting. I am still trying to grasp the 'higher power' concept. I hear people talk about their higher power and how it saved them etc. I think more logically and view addiction from a scientific standpoint.
Happiest sober ppl here seem to me the ones who, as Dee says, have just 'taken it off the table' completely. I kind of did something similar with cigs years ago.
Losing a parent is very difficult. You have to find a whole new normal. Which only ever comes with the passing of time. But staying drunk will only delay the process I think.
Hang in there Addy. It will pass and you will be so glad that its not another day 1.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 336
Originally Posted by Addy47
Thank you Canuck! I’m laying down now.
My teenage daughter has been pissy lately & I just finally called her out on it. I think in many ways I have allowed her to treat me like crap because of guilt! I don’t need to continue to punish myself. Anyway...after I told her that it hurts me when she snaps at me & doesn’t appreciate me the first thing that popped in my head was “I want to go get drunk!” Ugh. Confrontation of any type really wakes up my AV! I need to try to avoid it at all costs for now. I’ve locked myself in my room to take a late nap. Not drinking today!
My teenage daughter has been pissy lately & I just finally called her out on it. I think in many ways I have allowed her to treat me like crap because of guilt! I don’t need to continue to punish myself. Anyway...after I told her that it hurts me when she snaps at me & doesn’t appreciate me the first thing that popped in my head was “I want to go get drunk!” Ugh. Confrontation of any type really wakes up my AV! I need to try to avoid it at all costs for now. I’ve locked myself in my room to take a late nap. Not drinking today!
Good on you for taking time away from it without resorting to drink.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 336
Originally Posted by canguy
Same here Canuck. Freely admit I haven't gotten involved with AA, don't feel comfortable with it at all. Seems to me that it keeps alcohol at the centre of your existence, only difference being that you are always focusing on its absence. If you know what I mean....
Happiest sober ppl here seem to me the ones who, as Dee says, have just 'taken it off the table' completely. I kind of did something similar with cigs years ago.
Losing a parent is very difficult. You have to find a whole new normal. Which only ever comes with the passing of time. But staying drunk will only delay the process I think.
Hang in there Addy. It will pass and you will be so glad that its not another day 1.
Happiest sober ppl here seem to me the ones who, as Dee says, have just 'taken it off the table' completely. I kind of did something similar with cigs years ago.
Losing a parent is very difficult. You have to find a whole new normal. Which only ever comes with the passing of time. But staying drunk will only delay the process I think.
Hang in there Addy. It will pass and you will be so glad that its not another day 1.
I agree.. take it off the table. I know I don’t want to think about drinking or not drinking all the time.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2019
Posts: 33
Hello all. I feel the need to explain myself. I’m still sober. Have been here reading sporadically but having trouble focusing. I haven’t posted because #1 I am just so damn tired! STILL. I am thinking (and afraid) that I have already done too much damage to my body & it may be too late to reverse. #2 I felt as if it was rude to just jump in & post about myself without relaying to the rest of you. But to be honest, I get so confused who’s who & what’s going on with them & getting people mixed up. Maybe it’s because I use my phone only & read here for a few minutes at a time & maybe it’s because my brain is just too fried. Feel like I need to make a list of each person & cliff notes! Anyway, I hope that explains my silence some.
I AM still struggling though. With a lot. As I see some of you are as well. But I promise I’m here & will try to come out of this zombie phase soon & engage more. I am sending hugs to all my fellow sober peeps!
I AM still struggling though. With a lot. As I see some of you are as well. But I promise I’m here & will try to come out of this zombie phase soon & engage more. I am sending hugs to all my fellow sober peeps!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 617
Originally Posted by NotMe2pls
Hello all. I feel the need to explain myself. I’m still sober. Have been here reading sporadically but having trouble focusing. I haven’t posted because #1 I am just so damn tired! STILL. I am thinking (and afraid) that I have already done too much damage to my body & it may be too late to reverse. #2 I felt as if it was rude to just jump in & post about myself without relaying to the rest of you. But to be honest, I get so confused who’s who & what’s going on with them & getting people mixed up. Maybe it’s because I use my phone only & read here for a few minutes at a time & maybe it’s because my brain is just too fried. Feel like I need to make a list of each person & cliff notes! Anyway, I hope that explains my silence some.
I AM still struggling though. With a lot. As I see some of you are as well. But I promise I’m here & will try to come out of this zombie phase soon & engage more. I am sending hugs to all my fellow sober peeps!
I AM still struggling though. With a lot. As I see some of you are as well. But I promise I’m here & will try to come out of this zombie phase soon & engage more. I am sending hugs to all my fellow sober peeps!
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