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Class of April 2018 Part 9

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Old 01-08-2019, 07:49 PM
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Snitch thanks! You too Daisy!

Yes i sm getting a bit nervous. Good news is that I put in a couple of orders from Kuhl and Backcountry and I should have any clothes I’d need. I paid for overnight because I don’t want to be worried. I can feel that the rest of the time I’ll coasting. I’ve got a week to pack. It’s a lot for a long time, but I got it.

I arranged an an airport ride to John F Kennedy in NY. My sister is knee deep in stressful work, so she asked me to find another ride. My brother didn’t want to do it either. I fly out at 11:30pm. I get it. I found a great gal on Craigslist! These 2 young ladies have a little airport ride business Jenn and Jess (J&J). I called the number on Craigslist and got Jenn. She sounds awesome. I hired her. Extremely reasonable to take me 2.5 hours to JFK. It takes the stress off my siblings.

I am going to be a different person in a week. I already am.

V🔥🐍🏝
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Old 01-08-2019, 09:35 PM
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I'm pleased this is happening for you Vipe

D
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Old 01-09-2019, 12:46 AM
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morn, nothing much to report. watched a few old movies yesterday afo.
good to see u all and good luck on your travels viper x
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Old 01-09-2019, 06:46 AM
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Good afternoon my April gang,
I hope you're all having a good Wednesday. It's another bright, sunny but very cold day here, had to scrape the ice of my car windows this morning. All is good with me apart from I had a few flashbacks this morning to the rotten things I did when I was drinking, I felt sad and very ashamed. I know it's in the past and I can't change it but sometimes it all catches me unawares. I must keep looking forward and try hard every day to be a better person.

Thank you so much Bluesey, we are doing this, I always knew we could. Look forward to seeing more of you soon. x

Arghh Suze, you're doing the right thing distancing yourself from that 'friend', she has to find her own way, you have to protect your sobriety and keep working on you, your sobriety has to come first. I feel sorry for her and for her poor daughter, I mean what kind of a mother is too busy texting to take her child to the toilet, but you don't need this sort of person in your life right now.
Sorry to hear that you're worrying about your finances etc, but like you said you can't solve all your life problems in one day. This too shall pass, you will get there.
I'm glad Viper p.m'd you with the details of his trip, he's an inspiration isn't he? I'm looking forward to reading about his adventures of a lifetime.

Viper you are a very different person already to how you were in April last year when you joined this class, you've come a long way. So proud of you. xx

Hi Erratic, hope you're okay, I was thinking about you last night when I was watching Porridge at some ridiculous time, I just wondered if you were watching it too. I've watched a few of the 'Dad's army' episodes recently too and I find them very funny.

Nichole, stop lurking in the background and come and post please. We miss you and would love to have you with us.

Hi Dee, I hope all is good with you.

I'm off to do the school run pick up in a few minutes and will hopefully be back later. Much love to you all. xx

Thought for today...

"It is better to take many small steps in the right direction than to make a great leap forward only to stumble backward."
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Old 01-09-2019, 07:56 AM
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okay daisybelle you win I’ll post!!
I’m all good at the moment Friday will be a week sober from alcohol 4 days sober from pot I just need to give up energy drinks and tobacco neither one is healthy and they don’t help with my anxiety either but I have high hopes and I know I can do this I just have to keep my head in the right place
Happy to see y’all doing good makes me happy and gives me hope
Y’all have a lovely day
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Old 01-09-2019, 08:39 AM
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Hey nichole luv xx great going x good to see u post x

daisy, yeah i used to like the old porridge and yup bit partial to some dads army i have even watched the new movie, which wasnt as good as i thought. x

I have treated myself in buying this today, totaly spur of the moment buying but always wanted different things representing trees x i even got a painting at xmas from hub and daughter of a tree and it glows at night. so looks like i am going to be collecting house load of trees i think lol oh and also seen some lovely reptiles sculptures and dragons ooooh so much to choose from.

https://www.etsy.com/uk/listing/6076...d_out_detail=1

sry to hear ur having little flashbacks of your drinking days daisy. snitch on your friend maybe another heart to heart and yeah maybe best for yourself is to ween yourself away from her. xx hugs to u both and all x
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Old 01-09-2019, 03:10 PM
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All good thanks DB - J anuarys a pretty busy time here is all

congrats on a week Nichole Hiya erratic viper snitch and bluesy

D
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Old 01-09-2019, 03:20 PM
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Hi all, checking in before bed, bathed and p.j's on. It's been a lovely day but oh so cold, it's freezing tonight and it will be icy again in the morning. I'm prepared this time though, I've covered my car.
I went to karate this evening with my g.son, he's doing really well, he has a grading coming up soon and if he passes he will be a brown belt, which will be a big achievement for a 9 year old
I'm ok but still having flash backs, I seem to have spells of having them, I've been free of them for a while, but I've had quite a few today, it's weird, like this evening I was driving home and I can see myself doing something bad that I did a few years ago, it's so vivid and makes me feel so bad about myself, but there again the things I did were bad. I'll try not to let them get me down, this too shall pass as they say!

Yay Nichole, so happy to see you posting. Well done on being sober and pot free for almost a week, that's a good start. I think if I were you I'd just concentrate on staying sober and not smoking alcohol for now and worry about the other things at a later date, you can't do everything at once. How you feeling in yourself? How's things with your husband, did he find himself a new job? Take good care of yourself anyway and keep posting xx

Hi Erratic, I watch v little t.v to be honest but I have been watching them old comedies late at night recently, I haven't seen the dads army movie so can't comment on that
I love the tree, it's very unusual, good on you for treating yourself, you deserve it with all those hours you've been working.

Off to bed now, back tomorrow. Goodnight all with loads of love from me xxxx
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Old 01-09-2019, 08:31 PM
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Nichole! Hi! I’m happy to see you. 🌈

ugghhhhh. The ruminating. Do I go with the expensive camera? Do I use the money for that to travel around more? There will certainly be opportunities to do all kind of crazy stuff. I certainly want SCUBA. I’m a licensed diver and there’s no shortage of crystal waters down there. Plus trips outside where I’ll be. Another country? Some island? I could just try to keep this going on a long term basis. Money would help all of that. Believe or not but this is a cheap expedition for what it is. Dirt cheap.

Ive got to say there is money that magically appears regularly with 6 months under my belt. I’m like what’s in this money envelope? It must be like a $20. Oh it feels thick. O-M-G. I don’t even remember putting this here. No clue where it came from. This morning again under some clothes in my drawer I saw another envolope and was like ‘huh?’ $200 in 20’s. What the heck?

Previously i I was always scheming as to where I would get $60 for the night, several times a week. Think about that savings. Add it up for 24 weeks. Holy crap!!! That’s enough to buy more than one high quality camera.

Yep 6 months. I think it’s 180 days today or yesterday.

Well everything is changeable. Can always sell a camera in 6 months. That’s dependent on it not being stolen. 😬

Its such a Gucci problem - I feel like. I can’t justify the camera really except that I want it. It’s calling me. It’s a want and not a need. I made my way through college writing and taking pictures. I thought that’s what I would just continue to do, but drinking took that away and now I really don’t give a $***. You know? I’m going to heal up and get on with my life. Cut the cord from here. I going to have fun and heal. I’m not going to try to become a professional journalist or instagram sensation. Just keep it simple.

I’m just talking because honestly I have no one else to talk to abou this issue.

Viper 🐍
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Old 01-09-2019, 08:38 PM
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I have no advice really Vipe - never really been in that position - but pro and cons lists can be helpful

D
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Old 01-10-2019, 03:43 AM
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Good morning to all my April family and a freezing cold one it is too. I hope you are all okay and planning on posting soon. I'm tired this morning, I just couldn't get to sleep last night so no doubt I'll be a right rat bag later

Viper, you're such a diva lol, when I'm thinking of buying something I always ask myself two questions, can I afford it and do I need it? If the answer to either is no then I don't buy it. I don't suppose that's much help to your, but that's the way it goes with me. A pros and cons list as per Dee is a good idea too.
Anyway, 6 months is excellent so well done,

Im off to go and do a bit of housework now, back later, be good. xxxx

Daisyxxxxxxxxx

Thought for the day...... Have respect for yourself, and patience and compassion. With these, you can handle anything.
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Old 01-10-2019, 05:54 AM
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Yes daisybelle he found a job but at the moment he is working 7 days a week 8 to 12 hours a day 2nd shift I’m getting no help with the kids and it can get hard sometimes my daughter and son are close in age and they definitely fight like bother and sister they are 6 and 4 so everything is dramatic between them!!!
I really wanted to drink last night but I didn’t and very glad I stuck with it my AV was like my kids having a fit but I put it in timeout...
So I’m about to adventure out in the woods today behind my house I’m a little worried I’ve came across a dead deer awhile back and another animal done it by the looks and signs i hope I don’t come across it today my family wants me to carry a gun when I go back there by myself but it’s not really peaceful and it gets in the way so as long as I don’t become dinner today I’m happy
Hopefully everyone is having a lovely day
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Old 01-10-2019, 04:35 PM
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Hi all, just doing my quick bed time post. Hope you all had a good day, mine was okay, I made two phone calls that I kept putting off, one to make an appointment to have my car serviced and the other to change a hospital appointment. I am working on doing things that need doing sooner rather than later.

I'm happy you've posted again Nichole, I love reading them. I'm so glad your husband got a job but they are awful hours. I know only too well about kids fighting, my two youngest g.children are both 9, there's only 5 months between them and they have a love/hate relationship, when they love each other it's wonderful, but my God when they hate each other they are both a nightmare, they fight like cat and dog.
Keep fighting that A.V, don't let it peck your head, it's a shame you can't shoot that, lol. You're sounding very positive, which is good, keep it up.
You be careful in those woods, our Erratic would love all those trees, she has a thing about trees! Take care.

Goodnight Aprils, back tomorrow. Much love to all of you. xxx
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Old 01-11-2019, 12:11 AM
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Morning everyone ,

Nichole so good to see your posts, keep powering through the cravings. In my experience they will continue to hit you hard for a while but as you keep refusing to give in they do become weaker and easier to get through I promise! Remember, there is no situation that a drink will make better, only 1000 x worse! !

Awww Daisy I am sorry you are having a few awful flashbacks. I think it is perfectly normal for us to have them, but remember that you were in the grip of your alcoholism when you did those things, alcohol is cunning baffling and powerful, it makes us do things we would never dream of sober! We are not those people now and we never have to act like that again as long as we never pick up a drink. I mean how freeing is that?! You are doing amazing!

Viper if you were to ask me I would say go for the expensive camera!!!! But then I am a shopaholic eek!! Just make sure you have good insurance!!!

Ahhhh Erratic, sounds like you have a new passion lol. Mine is faux fur coats and leather jackets and boots!

I was meant to start my step 4 on wed but my sponsors little boy wasn't well so we may be doing it today if he is better. Other than that not much going on for me, no drama which is good, am eating healthy and feeling better for it, I don't need sweets or chocolate now as I have zero desire to drink which is amazing. Just gotta dust off the trainers now and get some exercise in!

Have a good day everyone, catch you all later X X
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Old 01-11-2019, 06:08 AM
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Good afternoon my Aprils and how are you all? Good I hope.
All good here, took my mum grocery shopping this morning and got mine done too and put away ( my least favourite chore).
My husband has shaved his hair into a sort of mohican style as a bet, he's got up this morning, coloured it blue with hair chalks and went to work!! Oh well, as long as he wears a hat when he's out with me, what the heck. At least he's happy.

Thanks Sue, for those words of wisdom re my flashbacks, they have really helped too. You're right, I am not that person any more, I have to keep looking forwards and not back. xx
I hope your sponsor's little boy is better today so you can start step 4, you're doing amazing too.

I'm off now to do a bit, back later. Much love to all of you. xxx

Thought for the day.....

"The past has no power to stop you from being present now. Only your grievance about the past can do that."
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Old 01-11-2019, 06:45 AM
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just a quick hi xx hugs to all oh and yup i do luv trees xx
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Old 01-11-2019, 10:05 AM
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I want start off with saying thanks y’all for the support I know I never really posted much just off and on but I’ve always read how everyone is doing everyday reading everyone’s post really does help I seen where some had unwanted things and tiggers that’s happened in every day life and y’all never gave up and kept moving forward and didn’t have the regret of drinking!!!!
I’m not goin to lie it’s getting harder everyday at the moment I about broke last night I even gave myself permission to drink because I didn’t think I could handle it but some how I done it and went to bed sober.... it’s almost 1pm here and I’m already having thoughts of drinking I’m going to take everything I have again and ride it out I know the drinking life all to well (which isn’t fun) and have no clue how the sobriety life is and everyone says it’s much better so I’m trying to get to that point!!
Hoping that everyone is doing amazing and you get to enjoy your weekend I’m not looking forward to the snow storm they are already getting the roads ready I think it’s 7 inches not much but I’m over the cold!!! And erratic trees are pretty amazing I have a tattoo of one
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Old 01-11-2019, 02:37 PM
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night nichole x i am at same point as u x oh and u got tattoo of a tree? i am waiting for something i see i want. I have a bee and flower chain with hub and daughter on my arm. i do so want a tree. nichole pm anytime x do know what ur going through with the drinking, also everyone else. Sometimes we need someone familiar and same place x also this group of Aprils!

och tonight i am watching some old music well not old but stuff i like. hugs to all xx
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Old 01-11-2019, 03:12 PM
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Stay with us Nichole - the more you decide not to drink the better off things will be

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Old 01-11-2019, 04:14 PM
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Doing my bed time check in, hope you've all had a good Friday.
I took my live in g.son to his daddy earlier, he's got him tonight and tomorrow night, I hate, hate, hate taking him there and he really didn't want to go, then when I get him back Sunday he will be back chatting and speaking like daddy with an aggressive edge to his voice, it's all a vicious circle.

Thanks for your support too Nichole, we need you just as much as you need support from us. You don't ever have to struggle alone and we've all been where you are, there's no judging in this class. We are all here for each other. It is hard at the beginning, very hard but you are stronger than you think and you can do this, just don't give up.
I bet your tattoo is gorgeous, Erratic will be wanting one now, lol.
I don't envy you the snow, but I bet your children love it. Anyway take good care of yourself.xx

Hi Erratic, I just knew you'd want a tree tattoo when I read Nichole's post, lol.
I've been watching old music this evening too, old 'Top of the Pops, some really good stuff, I was singing along with them all and my husband went and got his headphones, the cheek of him!

See you all tomorrow, sleep well. xxxx
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