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Old 01-19-2019, 09:32 PM   #181 (permalink)
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I had one of those days where I just kind of felt down, worried about things. My Dad isn't doing very well for the past month, kind of like he's giving up on life. He's going to see a neurologist next week, so I hope that something can be done for him to prompt him into being more responsive, active and communicative. He's basically clammed up and just sleeps, barely talks. After a nap I'm feeling less anxiety and sadness, but this is a great concern for me. None of it makes me want to drink, but I wanted to share. I'm going out to visit my parents tomorrow, and that usually perks him up a bit.
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Old 01-19-2019, 10:35 PM   #182 (permalink)
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Prayers and best wishes for you and your dad, Guener
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Old 01-20-2019, 12:34 AM   #183 (permalink)
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Sending love and support for you and your Dad Guener ❤️ Can you take him out somewhere? Would that spark him up a bit too? I hope he’s feeling a bit brighter soon
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Old 01-20-2019, 03:32 AM   #184 (permalink)
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I was talking to my Mom about getting him out more often, and she agrees that is a good idea, even if he doesn't say anything to his friends. I think he is embarrassed by not being able to express his thoughts verbally and depressed, but that doesn't mean he wouldn't be enjoying being out. I will ask him about it today when I see him, if I can remember to do that.
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Old 01-20-2019, 03:41 AM   #185 (permalink)
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Gm!

Guener, I hope your visit goes well. Sometimes if you ask people who are depressed if they want to go out they’ll always tell you “no”. How about tell him you’re taking him out and to get him into the car?

Perhaps you’ll also feel better once you see them.

Willow, how are you doing? Have you seen the grief counselor yet?

John, how’s it going with you?

Manta I’m totally thinking about you as I’m going through every item I own in this house I am totally exhausted. I also can’t wait for my ex-husband and children to get all of their things out of here so that I can put my house on the market as soon as possible.

I’m reading a book called “the secret“ it is amazingly wonderful and has, I believe, changed my life for the better in the last month alone. It is on the power of positive thinking and I truly believe it. As a person who has a tendency for depression, especially in the winter time, it is paramount for me to know that I am able to control my thoughts and switch them to thoughts that give me good feelings .

Ides of March:

The Ides of March used to be a popular band in United States. One of the original members attended my church later in life, and then acquired a Esophageal cancer. My ex-husband, also a musician, encouraged him to perform in what we call a “ coffee Haus“ at the church . He did, and the man sang beautifully. About four months later he did pass away.

My ex composed a song for people with cancer in general who have gone through treatment and have either made it past their treatment or have passed.

The title of the song is “no more pain“. One of the members of another famous band was there At the funeral, and when he heard the song my ex-husband played he said “where did you get that song from?“ And my ex said “I wrote it“. The man went on to complement my ex, and at the same time informed my ex that he could not have composed that song because it was so good.

😊
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Old 01-20-2019, 02:55 PM   #186 (permalink)
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Great story Free, really nice to read, thanks for sharing

No I haven’t seen the counsellor yet, she was booked out till mid February, so ai have an appointment then.

I really enjoyed the Secret. I should dig it out and re-read it. Great book! The documentary is really great to watch too.

It’s Monday morning here and I’m not feeling motivated to do much.... Coffee first and will see if that helps
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Old 01-20-2019, 08:17 PM   #187 (permalink)
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Hi everyone.
I just tried to catch up and read our May thread... there was a lot- which is a good thing!!

G- thoughts and prayers for you and your dad
Free- I’m confused, what is with the water bottles? You’are purging to move, I’m assuming?
Hi mantra!!
Willow- glad to hear you have session scheduled for feb

The water bottles reminded me of a specific pink water bottle I used for my wine. Since it was tinted pink, white wine looked like water in it. It was perfect for out and about drinking...used it constantly. It ended up smelling like wine so bad, even the dishwasher couldn’t help it out, and I threw it away.

I’m probably the last one of the group to be officially 8 months- it will feb1.

I’ve been into listening to podcasts lately.. I’ve found one about recovery that I really enjoy. I put my headphones on and do laundry/cleaning/cooking. And binus ... with the headphones, I can’t hear my girls fighting or whining 😉
Have a great day everyone!!
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Old 01-21-2019, 03:45 AM   #188 (permalink)
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That's a lovely recounting of Ides of March, Free.

My visit with my parents went well, and my Dad was more talkative than usual. He was staying in pj's all day, so we didn't go out for coffee, but when I left he was sitting outside in the sun with my Mom, which is also good for him just being in the outdoors where they have a lovely view. He's eating a little better, too.

I'm still working on my anxiety that has been getting to me for the past couple of days. It's tough but I'm getting through it fine. My AV reared its head once where I was thinking about just what it was like to evade things, but it was brief, no need to go in that direction! I have had some nausea from tapering off completely from my medication that I have taken for anxiety (Gabapentin), which no doubt has been a factor in what I've been experiencing lately.

I'm going to do a few chores today to keep me busy but also rest up for a busy week ahead.

My May friends, you are wonderful.
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Old 01-21-2019, 03:03 PM   #189 (permalink)
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Bumblebee and Free I used to have a few water bottles that I filled with wine too, including those small ones that you get on planes. They fitted in my handbag for “emergencies”. When I think back to the lengths I went to to hide alcohol, it’s quite incredible, although at the time I thought nothing of it. I had wine stashed in several places and I even found some empties stashed in my wardrobe months after I stopped...

Guener I’m so glad you visited your Mum and Dad and that your Dad seems brighter. I hope the anxiety settles down again soon for you. I’ve been feeling anxious the past few days too and I wondered if it was something to do with the full moon... It could just be my circumstance too. I’ve been constantly worrying about work. I think I have worked out a way to go forward but don’t want to verbalise it in case it doesn’t happen. Fingers crossed everything will pan out ok.

I hope you’re all having a good week everyone! You guys are all awesome
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Old 01-21-2019, 05:23 PM   #190 (permalink)
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Hi

I just wrote a very long post and I got interrupted and it all disappeared.

So I’m going to just briefly say hello everyone good to see you, glad everything worked out with your folks G, Hi to B, W, J —

I was just saying about positive thinking. I’m a very anxious person also and was desperate to figure it out and I think it all has to do with negative and catastrophizing in my thinking.

The book “the secret” that I am reading tells us that it is impossible to feel sad or bad or depressed or anxious if our thoughts are positive and happy. What a wonderful notion !what a wonderful truth !

So moving forward I have different Mantras and I catch myself in my early stages of changing the way I am thinking— by stopping the negative thoughts and changing them to positive thoughts. It’s hard work right now just like sobriety is in its early stages. Soon it should be habit!

We will all get to our one year anniversary, not one of us will fall off, and we will have a great online celebration 😍😊😊😀
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Old 01-22-2019, 02:27 PM   #191 (permalink)
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Yes Free! We will!! 😍😍😍
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Old 01-22-2019, 02:42 PM   #192 (permalink)
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Guener how are you going today? I hope the anxiety is settling a bit?

Manta how are you going?

Hi Free
Hi Bumblebee
Hi Dee
Hi anyone else lurking

Sending you all a big hug

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Old 01-23-2019, 12:33 AM   #193 (permalink)
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Things are settling a bit for me, not totally even keel but better. I feel somewhat distracted and tired. Oddly, I have been sleeping a little bit better through all of what's kind of crazy through this, maybe just from spending a lot of energy managing my mind all the time.

Breathe ...
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Old 01-23-2019, 01:18 AM   #194 (permalink)
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Yes I need to remind myself to breathe too...
Had a very emotional day, I think partly because I didn’t sleep well and I’m overtired....
Breathe....
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Old 01-23-2019, 08:57 PM   #195 (permalink)
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Driving by....

Day 240

Putting some stuff on the online marketplace and saw a mouse walk right past me and behind some furniture 😳🤬


This. Is. WAR!!!!!!!!

Cannot have this setback. Will squash it like the AV😁

Wishing everyone who reads this have peace and hope through the power of Sobriety
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Old 01-23-2019, 10:47 PM   #196 (permalink)
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Good luck with the mouse Free and congrats on 240

D
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Old 01-24-2019, 01:54 PM   #197 (permalink)
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Just a really quick hello to everyone
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Old 01-24-2019, 07:02 PM   #198 (permalink)
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Hi willow.

Hi Dee

Hi john

Hi manta!

Hi bumble

Hi Guener

Everybody good?
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Old 01-25-2019, 07:03 AM   #199 (permalink)
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Oooh, I was so tired last night after a day of taking my Mom to a medical appointment 175 miles away from my parents home.

It's already the eve of another weekend, where does the time go some weeks?

I'm feeling pretty good this morning, adjusting still to being off the anxiety medication is going fine.

My Dad was doing well yesterday while Mom and I were gone all day, some friends dropped by to check on him and give company during the day. Last night he was actually speaking better than I have heard him in the past week, which brought my spirits up about his situation. Small things to be grateful for, right?
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Old 01-25-2019, 06:52 PM   #200 (permalink)
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Coming to say hello quick.

g- glad your dad was talking better! What is his condition, if you don’t mind me asking? And I apologize if you previously explained- I must of missed it.

My week also also went fast. Like, how is it seriously the end of January?

busy day- chiropractic apt (I needed it so bad!!!) and dermatologist (laser procedure on my face)

busy weekend too.

have a good one ☝️
bumble
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