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The Power Of Sobriety Thread (POST!) #8

Old 03-02-2019, 11:55 PM
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Hope things are less fraught than you fear SG

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Old 03-03-2019, 07:01 AM
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SG, sorry to read about the tire. Wow, winter sure does seem to be hanging on up there. Hopefully, this storm is a last gasp.

On the anger front...well, I can only speak for myself. I can't put my finger on how or why it happened, but, somehow during my recovery, I lost any desire to be angry. I will do anything to change my perspective and find a way to acceptance. I'm not sure if there is a message in that simplistic way I approach anger, I just know that it has been working for me. Hey, you could flip the switch and just bring your wife flowers or a card?

FBL, glad that things are beginning to look up.

I am finally feeling better. I was very sick with bronchitis for the better part of three weeks. I was either feeling sick and coughing or extremely tired all the time. My DR was out of town last week so I went to the emergency room. NE, who is a nurse, was thinking I might have walking pneumonia. Turns out it was viral bronchitis. They gave me cough drops and that was it...stayed sick another week. Finally got a steroid pak from my DR on Thursday and began to improve immediately.

Haha, I feel completely better now. I worked out on Thursday and Friday and spent all day yesterday treating NE like a Queen for her birthday. We had a blast. It was the first time I stayed over in 3 weeks and only the second time I even saw her. I was a sick puppy.

This week we are off to vist her son and his gf in Seattle. We have lots of cool plans including a two-day hike, staying in a cabin.

Hope all are doing well. Catch up after my trip. Best to everyone!

Carlos
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Old 03-03-2019, 02:49 PM
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Glad you're feeling better Carlos

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Old 03-04-2019, 01:19 PM
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Happy belated soberversary Glee! I’m inspired by your story how you dealt with the coworker/supervisor. I have a lot of conflict in my job. I don’t have anyone reporting to me, thank goodness. The stress comes from team projects when others don’t pull their weight, or from clients who just don’t get it and can get pretty mad and aggressive. I feel like I’m always taking the high road, over explaining everything, killing people with kindness, even defusing situations with humor. A lot of the time, this works, but it does stress me out!

FBL, I’m glad you are doing better. That situation would create a lot of anxiety for me. I just can’t imagine. You are handling so well!

SG, sorry about the tires and your wife. I’m glad she’s ok. It’s always frustrating dealing with any unexpected and unbudgeted expense.

Carlos, glad you are feeling better. I’ve been sick with a chest cold/cough going on three weeks. I have my energy back and it’s at the end. But it sure is taking a while to completely go away. My hubby has the same thing. Of course, my son only had it for 3 days.

It should be a low key work week for me. I am taking advantage of the extra time to do some art projects and plan Summer vacations and camps. We might be doing a new IEP for sonny boy next year too, so doing some research on this. Things seems pretty manageable and low stress for me at the time. I have to remind myself that sometimes feeling really good can “trigger” me as much as feeling really bad can. I think I learned this from my younger years in college. Every breakup with a boyfriend, I’d drink my sorrows away. Every success on an exam called for a reward for hard work so we’d drink to celebrate.

I thinkI’ll go to an extra yoga class this week, and do more meditation to keep myself even.

Have a good week!
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Old 03-04-2019, 01:47 PM
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Thanks, Dee and F-50. Hope you get your energy back too, F-50. There simply is no price to put on feeling good again. Haha, even Nurse Ratchet, aka: NE was feeling sorry for me...although, she still claims it was a tad bit of Man-Broncitis.

Still two more days of work prior to leaving for Seattle. However, I'm not all that focused on working. Off to body-combat class soon. I love this Monday class...it is packed to the max with people and full of energy and we burn like 700-800 calories in that 55 minutes.

Have a good week, POST's.

Carlos
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Old 03-04-2019, 07:42 PM
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Carlos - Last year this time I was sick with bronchitis for weeks. It was no joke. I’m glad you’re feeling better. Have fun traveling with NE!!

SG - Way to stay relaxed over the time-consuming and expensive car trouble. The big book quote that Courage shared hits the nail on the head regarding the challenge with anger.

Courage! So good to see you!!

FBL - I’m so glad that your eye is on track for recovery. I find it very hard to be patient. With how hard you work I’m thinking it might be a bit of a challenge for you? I hope you feel back to normal as soon as possible.

F50 - Keep trucking away.
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Old 03-06-2019, 04:41 AM
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I am glad that you are feeling better Carlos! Have a good time in Seattle.

Glee, how are things going for you at work with your challenging coworker?
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Old 03-08-2019, 07:54 AM
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My wife had a second flat tire in a week. Turns out that the tire place did not properly seat the air valve, thus causing the leak. They replaced that tire no charge and all is well. I joked with my wife that we are going to have to replace her doughnut tire soon with the use it has been getting recently.

I was thinking back on the time when these life events would be a serious drinking trigger for me. So happy that I can just rationally deal with things and move on.

Have a good day all!
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Old 03-11-2019, 08:01 PM
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SG - It’s amazing to me every time I handle a situation head on instead of drink over it. I’m glad the tire problems were manageable. I have recurring drinking dreams. The focus isn’t on drinking or altering my reality, it’s on starting sobriety over. As soon as I realize it was a nightmare,I’m grateful that I have developed confidence to feel uncomfortable.

I’m working with the challenging individual at work. I set up a meeting where I leveled with him and said that I felt uncomfortable about our interaction. I’ve scheduled regular follow ups to offer assistance and guidance, and a rapport is starting to develop. I’m grateful to be developing the skills to handle difficult situations that used to seem impossible for me.

FBL - How’s the eye?
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Old 03-13-2019, 05:33 AM
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Glee, I mentioned that on one thread, that I had a drinking dream and I was mad because I had to start my count over again. I think that is a good sign if I slip up down the road, I won't be out long hopefully.

That's great that you are developing a better working relationship with this individual. Sometimes, just showing an interest and taking the time to know someone a little better helps.

Hope you are still on the mend FBL.

Have a good day all!
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Old 03-13-2019, 11:41 PM
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Back up at 2:20 am for work and prework exercise. It's tough getting up at this time when I spent last week going to bed at this time. Thank goodness for coffee!

How is Seattle Carlos?

I hope all are well!
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Old 03-15-2019, 04:10 AM
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Haha, SG...yes, thank goodness for coffee, indeed. I certainly needed it on Tuesday after having flown home all night on Monday. Made myself stay up all day with working and a gym class in the evening. Went out for 10 hours that night. That was amazing. It's hard for me to sleep even 6 hours most nights.

Our trip was wonderful. NE's son and his gf were a delight. We hiked, cooked and ate out, saw 4 bands, played cards, stayed in a cabin in the woods one night. The weather was unusually cold for there with snow...lots of it in the mountains. Thankfully it was sunny on the day of our big hike.

Glee and SG...hats off to you both and your ability to manage people in the workforce. I spent 19 years in management and none of that time was while in recovery. I was a crappy manager of people probably. I do manage projects with crews these days, but, I see it as more about finishing the work and not managing them individually. I think the recovery tool that has been most beneficial to me since re-entry into the working world is focusing on humility. Ego is still there, just when I notice it, I consciously try to tone it back.

I have a kinda easy day today with just one meeting planned, Bummer is that it is near Orlando and nearly two hours away. Thankfully it avoids rush hours.

An easy day was my plan. Tomorrow I'll be doing my fourth Savage Race and they are rather grueling on my body. We started with four of us from the YMCA a couple of years ago. I think there are 14 of us for this one. Six guys and eight women. NE hurt her neck and will not be joining us. We do it as a team and the closeness and camaraderie that we've developed while training is just like it felt in my team sports days. Crossing that finish line together is such a sense of shared accomplishment. Trust me...it's a love/hate relationship with the race itself.

How's your recovery going, FBL?

Hope all POST's are doing well and about to enjoy a super-sober weekend!

Best to all...Carlos
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Old 03-15-2019, 05:26 AM
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As long as the gas bubble is still there, it will be tough to see much of anything. My mood has improved this past week. I've been sleeping better at night and taking frequent breaks during the day. I've also been able to walk outside more frequently, which helps a lot. Next check-up is 2 weeks from today, so hopefully I'll see some improvement by then.

Have a great weekend, gang!
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Old 03-15-2019, 11:52 PM
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Welcome back Carlos! I am glad you and NE had a great time out west. Seattle is definitely a place I'd like to visit at some point, preferably in the spring or summer. I work with someone who had lived there, and he said there were no bugs there. People had windows they opened without screens. I can't imagine that growing up in the East.

Sorry the eye is taking so long to heal FBL. Is there anything they can do to speed things up? I think my father had some issue sort of like that, and he was getting monthly shots in the eye to help. It was not a detached retina like you are suffering through however. Are you able to drive in recovery?

Another early day of work for me. At least I will be done in the early afternoon. We had a huge line of thunderstorms rumble through last night (keeping me awake far too late) that knocked the temperature down 30 degrees in six hours. Talk about March not making up its mind. We have had snow, heavy thunderstorms and seventy degree weather all in the past two weeks.

Have a good day all!
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Old 03-16-2019, 05:41 AM
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I've been able to drive to and from work (only a few miles) with my good eye. Really nothing can be done about the gas bubble. It will eventually go away by itself, but could be a few weeks yet. I'm so happy that my mood has improved. I'm finally starting to feel like my old self again.
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Old 03-16-2019, 09:33 AM
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FBL, I'm glad your mood is rebounding. I don't know whether good spirits are a cause of healing or an effect, but they're definitely a good sign. My husband just had surgery and it's been really obvious that his mood and his physical recovery go hand in hand. I hope you're treating yourself to some pleasures to keep the spirits up.

Stargazer -- just writing that, I like your username. Seattle isn't good for stargazing, I expect. Maybe New Mexico? I'm always wishing you a really good getaway.

Glee, congratulations that your approach with the "challenging individual" is paying off. My comparable relationships are with students and research assistants. I wonder what you mean by "challenging"? Do you mean someone inappropriately raising questions about the correctness of your directions? Or do you mean some other interactive difficulty... for instance, I had an RA who simply would never speak unless specifically asked to.

Carlos, your post sounds happy. Just truly easy-going and happy. ...hey -- I've switched from Reds to Lights. No particular reason. I still smoke 2-3 a day. Even my doctor says that's no worse than Diet Pepsi.

It's so good to spend a little time communing with you all.

xxxooo

--sarah
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Old 03-17-2019, 12:05 AM
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Reds were the cig of choice when it was cool to smoke. I too switched to lights when I picked up back in the day. I never became addicted to a daily habit, but would burn through them sitting in smoke filled bars back in the day. It must be 25 years since my last one. My mother still smokes 3-4 a day, and she has made it to 84, so there are worse things I guess!

Funny you mentioned New Mexico. My wife's father's family lived in that area for hundreds of years. Actually, it was Mexico before the border jumped over them back in the day. My wife tells me how beautiful the sky is at night in the Southwest. I hope to visit sometime.

Take care all!
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Old 03-17-2019, 04:55 PM
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Courage!!! How good to see you. So hope all is well with my friend. ♥♥♥
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Old 03-18-2019, 07:27 PM
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Hi everyone

FBL - it’s good to see you here again. Keep posting, even if - especially if - your mood is low. For me it’s dangerous to isolate and easy to forget that it’s ok not to be ok.

Courage - So nice to hear from you. People at work challenge me in many different ways . This one in particular was defensive and rude. I had to work hard to look past the behavior and try to understand why he was upset. We’ve had some productive discussions since then fortunately.

Stargazer - You’ll appreciate this. Today I had conversations with 3 separate people about misconduct. How does that happen???

Carlos - I miss you! I’m glad you had a wonderful trip with NE!!
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Old 03-19-2019, 04:03 AM
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Thank you, Glee! My mood has improved greatly the past couple of weeks. I will say that I started to go to some very dark places...places that I hadn't visited since the end of my drinking days. Was a good reminder of how far I've come these past 10 years.
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