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Great job everyone! So glad to ‘meet’ you all! Prayers for all who are struggling today... |
I have to confess - I tried to come here and read the messages to feel strong BUT I was too weak to say I needed help. Tonight I have had a drink. I can not remember where it was I mentioned my son was going back to Uni today and needed me to be strong - but I have failed. God, I need that child so much! Has just been him and me since 2000 but I can't tell him that as he NEEDS to break away and be him! After all, is that not what good parenting is about? Raising independent successful kids? Today we took him back to his Uni digs. Tomorrow he heads of to a camp for Student Uni Exec conference camp for a week. After that he does a week of on campus training. THEN it is freshers week. My child genuinely is the best. This is where he is today, but in the past he has done so bleeding much. My son is just so amazing, and I don't know why as since August 2013 I have been a failure. |
OK, not sure if the site is being hacked - but just had an email trying to encourage me to click to be diverted elsewhere? Sounds wrong to me so haven't accepted, but advise?? xx |
Originally Posted by StartAnew68
(Post 7001726)
OK, not sure if the site is being hacked - but just had an email trying to encourage me to click to be diverted elsewhere? Sounds wrong to me so haven't accepted, but advise?? xx |
Originally Posted by StartAnew68
(Post 7001722)
I have to confess - I tried to come here and read the messages to feel strong BUT I was too weak to say I needed help. Tonight I have had a drink. I can not remember where it was I mentioned my son was going back to Uni today and needed me to be strong - but I have failed. God, I need that child so much! Has just been him and me since 2000 but I can't tell him that as he NEEDS to break away and be him! After all, is that not what good parenting is about? Raising independent successful kids? Today we took him back to his Uni digs. Tomorrow he heads of to a camp for Student Uni Exec conference camp for a week. After that he does a week of on campus training. THEN it is freshers week. My child genuinely is the best. This is where he is today, but in the past he has done so bleeding much. My son is just so amazing, and I don't know why as since August 2013 I have been a failure. |
Checking in. Monday morning. Feeling blah. I normally go to the gym at 8 every morning but I’m just too tired. I have to ferry my kids about then I’m going back to bed. I couldn’t sleep last night so around midnight I took some ambien. This is not something I want to make into a habit. Sunday was a day of sugar binging so from today I am going to cut all sugar during the week. Strangely I had no cravings at all yesterday. Maybe the sugar helped or maybe things are getting a bit easier. Anyway, have to rush to shuttle kids around. Later. |
Hi. Just wanted to shared that i am feeling triggered. Was reading some stories in the big book that i could relate to and they were so depressing, and reminded me of my past drinking episodes and started feeling sorry for myself... gosh. i think for now i'll put that aside and just focus on staying sober today. maybe have some ice cream. |
Originally Posted by mkvan
(Post 7001789)
Hi. Just wanted to shared that i am feeling triggered. Was reading some stories in the big book that i could relate to and they were so depressing, and reminded me of my past drinking episodes and started feeling sorry for myself... gosh. i think for now i'll put that aside and just focus on staying sober today. maybe have some ice cream. |
Originally Posted by StartAnew68
(Post 7001726)
OK, not sure if the site is being hacked - but just had an email trying to encourage me to click to be diverted elsewhere? Sounds wrong to me so haven't accepted, but advise?? xx if you want to copy the text of the email and sent it to me in a PM I can take a look SA. I'm sorry you drank. What do you think stops you from coming here for help first? D |
stay strong mkvan - triggers don't need to be pulled. You can get through this :) D |
Originally Posted by LoveHateWhine
(Post 7001718)
Happy Sunday everyone! All good stuff here. Thanks to everyone for sharing!! I am sticking to my new plan of no alcohol, no sugar, reduced coffee consumption, exercise and meditation every day, and these are just a few. I know it sounds like a lot, but I am very goal oriented (wonder why that hasn't worked in the past with just alcohol?). I may have mentioned I am working with a therapist and this is how I decided to best attack all this. All at once, a complete lifestyle change. The thing I like most about her is that she does not tell you what to do. She listens and helps guide you into making all the decisions and action plans yourself. Of course if she thinks you are headed in the wrong direction, she steers you back on course with questions, comments to get you thinking, etc. So Day 2 of my lifestyle change (as far as alcohol, diet, exercise are concerned) is halfway through. Now, the other stuff, like relationships, interpersonal dealings and all that takes time, and can't be measured in "days". All in all, I feel pretty good about everything. Have a great rest of your Sunday! |
Hi folks, doing well here. I took my son to a baseball game today and it was HOT HOT HOT.. too hot! The sun was brutal. Fortunately our seats were in the shade for most of the game but when the sun started moving in, we both knew it was time to go. It was fun and exhausting all at the same time! Just chilling tonight and trying to stay cool... It's Day 2 for me but I'm probably not going to continue to post the day count here. I have an app on my phone that keeps count for me. I am committed, 100%, no ifs ands or buts! Have a good evening (morning) all! |
Originally Posted by Juno11
(Post 7001881)
Hi folks, doing well here. I took my son to a baseball game today and it was HOT HOT HOT.. too hot! The sun was brutal. Fortunately our seats were in the shade for most of the game but when the sun started moving in, we both knew it was time to go. It was fun and exhausting all at the same time! Just chilling tonight and trying to stay cool... It's Day 2 for me but I'm probably not going to continue to post the day count here. I have an app on my phone that keeps count for me. I am committed, 100%, no ifs ands or buts! Have a good evening (morning) all! |
Hi all! Mind if I join? Day 1 for me after a slip. I need to hold myself accountable. I would love to get outside and do something, but like Juno said, it is HOT. So I’ll clean house and dream of a boat. |
Hello everyone! Day 3 here and feeling pretty good. I was happy to work a few hours this morning, as it reminded me that I love my work and I never want to have to call in due to being drunk/hungover. Today, that is my motivation. Be well, be safe, be sober! :c011: |
Day TWO for me. Already had that lying voice snipping at me when I went to the grocery store. I know I don't need to tell anyone what it says! The difference now: I turn 50 in February. I plan to be sober in my 50s, 60s and beyond. I will not leave the legacy of behavior, to my girls, that has been left to me. I will redirect the branches of this family tree. Those branches will reach to the sun and thrive! I plan to work w/SMART and Refuge plans. I know Refuge has teleconference meetings, so that'd be good. Last night, I had dinner in my home with my daughters for the first time in a long time. Usually, they eat; I go on the porch and drink and watch Netflix. No more! No more! |
Tuesday morning. Yesterday was my best day so far. I had no cravings (seldom get them on a Monday) and also had no sugar. Ate and slept well too. I am feeling a little down but there are other reasons for that rather than my impending future sobriety. |
Sorry to have been such a Debbie Downer earlier. Just when I was feeling at my lowest point the local Crisis team walked in the door - I hadn't realised that my mobile provider had changed my number!! They've been trying to contact me since Friday morning after my hospital visit on Thursday night. I had left my front door unlocked so they let themselves in as they were worried. So I have an appointment with the mental health team midday tomorrow as they were satisfied I am not suicidal - just low., |
Hello all. Just a quick check in at the end of day 10. Today was tough, but I'm happy to have got through it. Sorry not to be interacting more, but I am reading all that people post. Thoughts and prayers with you all. |
Hi all, just checking in here early Monday night. As others have mentioned, it is really HOT here. Only went outside a few times today and it was brutal. Supposed to be worse tomorrow. Just hanging around the house, trying to fix a garage door that has frustrated me to no end. Giving it up for the night. |
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