24 Hour Recovery Connections Part 397
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 8,762
Sorry to be a downer but I’m having a bit of a rough spot, sensing the black hole creeping up. I don’t want to fall in, but I’ve maybe already slipped down the side a bit. I’ve been feeling it creeping up the last week or so and wondering to myself if I should seek some counselling. But it’s so expensive and hard to get into here (weeks long waiting lists) and I’m not working many hours these next few weeks so money is tight.
I really thought I was doing ok. But I was maybe in that pink cloud I’ve heard people talk about? I’ve been drinking for 30 years, pretty much daily for the last 20. But still working, studying, maintaining a semblance of normalcy throughout it all. I’m on Day 60 sober today (longest in my memory). And things have been up and down but I seemed generally to be doing pretty well I thought. But now I’m feeling like utter crap. I’m still in bed and it’s after 9am. The house guests left yesterday. I have the whole day to myself and don’t have to go anywhere thank goodness because I just cannot seem to summon the energy for anything. I’m so tired and I have a headache, probably the massive sugar pig out yesterday, ugggghhh I feel like such a slug.
After such a challenging weekend and last few days trying so hard not to drink in the face of so much temptation I have no energy or motivation for anything. Yesterday one of the relatives questioned my decision to leave my “great” job to work in aged care (they were like WT???) and now I’m questioning it all over again. It took me years to find the courage to quit my “great” job and so many people have questioned my decision, they think I’m nuts (this is quite possibly true). And now I’m questioning and second guessing everything, my life, my purpose on this planet (really what is the point of it all anyway ????). I don’t know whether my decisions about my life direction regarding work and study are the right thing to have done as I’ve created so much more work ahead for myself. I’ve made major changes in the last year and it’s sort of exciting but so scary too. A year ago I quit my well paid “really good” job (that I’m just so over after nearly 2 decades) to study towards a healthcare job that I feel has a sense of purpose and service to the community by helping care for our aging population, and am now only working casual jobs to support myself through uni (again).
Some days I just wonder what is the point? What is the point of all this? Some days it seems easier to fall into oblivion. But I’m going to commit to another 24 hours sober.
Sorry for the long winded post, I don’t usually talk about my fears and depression and sense of pointlessness much because I don’t want to bring the mood down but I just needed to get it off my chest. I’m not sure if this is the right place, so I’m sorry if it’s not. My husband is generally awesome but he just doesn’t “get” depression, he says “just snap out of it, you’ll be ‘right mate”. If only it was so easy to just snap out of it.
Thanks for sharing the brave girls club daily truth Bandicoot, one step.... I think I maybe can do one step, but maybe later, I’m staying in bed a bit longer for now
(((Snufkin)))
(((Free)))
Congratulations on the new (old) job Sunflowerlife, that’s so exciting!
Hugs to everyone who needs a hug today
24 hours sober please ❤️
I really thought I was doing ok. But I was maybe in that pink cloud I’ve heard people talk about? I’ve been drinking for 30 years, pretty much daily for the last 20. But still working, studying, maintaining a semblance of normalcy throughout it all. I’m on Day 60 sober today (longest in my memory). And things have been up and down but I seemed generally to be doing pretty well I thought. But now I’m feeling like utter crap. I’m still in bed and it’s after 9am. The house guests left yesterday. I have the whole day to myself and don’t have to go anywhere thank goodness because I just cannot seem to summon the energy for anything. I’m so tired and I have a headache, probably the massive sugar pig out yesterday, ugggghhh I feel like such a slug.
After such a challenging weekend and last few days trying so hard not to drink in the face of so much temptation I have no energy or motivation for anything. Yesterday one of the relatives questioned my decision to leave my “great” job to work in aged care (they were like WT???) and now I’m questioning it all over again. It took me years to find the courage to quit my “great” job and so many people have questioned my decision, they think I’m nuts (this is quite possibly true). And now I’m questioning and second guessing everything, my life, my purpose on this planet (really what is the point of it all anyway ????). I don’t know whether my decisions about my life direction regarding work and study are the right thing to have done as I’ve created so much more work ahead for myself. I’ve made major changes in the last year and it’s sort of exciting but so scary too. A year ago I quit my well paid “really good” job (that I’m just so over after nearly 2 decades) to study towards a healthcare job that I feel has a sense of purpose and service to the community by helping care for our aging population, and am now only working casual jobs to support myself through uni (again).
Some days I just wonder what is the point? What is the point of all this? Some days it seems easier to fall into oblivion. But I’m going to commit to another 24 hours sober.
Sorry for the long winded post, I don’t usually talk about my fears and depression and sense of pointlessness much because I don’t want to bring the mood down but I just needed to get it off my chest. I’m not sure if this is the right place, so I’m sorry if it’s not. My husband is generally awesome but he just doesn’t “get” depression, he says “just snap out of it, you’ll be ‘right mate”. If only it was so easy to just snap out of it.
Thanks for sharing the brave girls club daily truth Bandicoot, one step.... I think I maybe can do one step, but maybe later, I’m staying in bed a bit longer for now
(((Snufkin)))
(((Free)))
Congratulations on the new (old) job Sunflowerlife, that’s so exciting!
Hugs to everyone who needs a hug today
24 hours sober please ❤️
orangutan
Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 5,970
Originally Posted by Willow68 
Sorry to be a downer but I’m having a bit of a rough spot, sensing the black hole creeping up. I don’t want to fall in, but I’ve maybe already slipped down the side a bit. I’ve been feeling it creeping up the last week or so and wondering to myself if I should seek some counselling. But it’s so expensive and hard to get into here (weeks long waiting lists) and I’m not working many hours these next few weeks so money is tight.
I really thought I was doing ok. But I was maybe in that pink cloud I’ve heard people talk about? I’ve been drinking for 30 years, pretty much daily for the last 20. But still working, studying, maintaining a semblance of normalcy throughout it all. I’m on Day 60 sober today (longest in my memory). And things have been up and down but I seemed generally to be doing pretty well I thought. But now I’m feeling like utter crap. I’m still in bed and it’s after 9am. The house guests left yesterday. I have the whole day to myself and don’t have to go anywhere thank goodness because I just cannot seem to summon the energy for anything. I’m so tired and I have a headache, probably the massive sugar pig out yesterday, ugggghhh I feel like such a slug.
After such a challenging weekend and last few days trying so hard not to drink in the face of so much temptation I have no energy or motivation for anything. Yesterday one of the relatives questioned my decision to leave my “great” job to work in aged care (they were like WT???) and now I’m questioning it all over again. It took me years to find the courage to quit my “great” job and so many people have questioned my decision, they think I’m nuts (this is quite possibly true). And now I’m questioning and second guessing everything, my life, my purpose on this planet (really what is the point of it all anyway ????). I don’t know whether my decisions about my life direction regarding work and study are the right thing to have done as I’ve created so much more work ahead for myself. I’ve made major changes in the last year and it’s sort of exciting but so scary too. A year ago I quit my well paid “really good” job (that I’m just so over after nearly 2 decades) to study towards a healthcare job that I feel has a sense of purpose and service to the community by helping care for our aging population, and am now only working casual jobs to support myself through uni (again).
Some days I just wonder what is the point? What is the point of all this? Some days it seems easier to fall into oblivion. But I’m going to commit to another 24 hours sober.
Sorry for the long winded post, I don’t usually talk about my fears and depression and sense of pointlessness much because I don’t want to bring the mood down but I just needed to get it off my chest. I’m not sure if this is the right place, so I’m sorry if it’s not. My husband is generally awesome but he just doesn’t “get” depression, he says “just snap out of it, you’ll be ‘right mate”. If only it was so easy to just snap out of it.
Thanks for sharing the brave girls club daily truth Bandicoot, one step.... I think I maybe can do one step, but maybe later, I’m staying in bed a bit longer for now
(((Snufkin)))
(((Free)))
Congratulations on the new (old) job Sunflowerlife, that’s so exciting!
Hugs to everyone who needs a hug today
24 hours sober please ❤️
I really thought I was doing ok. But I was maybe in that pink cloud I’ve heard people talk about? I’ve been drinking for 30 years, pretty much daily for the last 20. But still working, studying, maintaining a semblance of normalcy throughout it all. I’m on Day 60 sober today (longest in my memory). And things have been up and down but I seemed generally to be doing pretty well I thought. But now I’m feeling like utter crap. I’m still in bed and it’s after 9am. The house guests left yesterday. I have the whole day to myself and don’t have to go anywhere thank goodness because I just cannot seem to summon the energy for anything. I’m so tired and I have a headache, probably the massive sugar pig out yesterday, ugggghhh I feel like such a slug.
After such a challenging weekend and last few days trying so hard not to drink in the face of so much temptation I have no energy or motivation for anything. Yesterday one of the relatives questioned my decision to leave my “great” job to work in aged care (they were like WT???) and now I’m questioning it all over again. It took me years to find the courage to quit my “great” job and so many people have questioned my decision, they think I’m nuts (this is quite possibly true). And now I’m questioning and second guessing everything, my life, my purpose on this planet (really what is the point of it all anyway ????). I don’t know whether my decisions about my life direction regarding work and study are the right thing to have done as I’ve created so much more work ahead for myself. I’ve made major changes in the last year and it’s sort of exciting but so scary too. A year ago I quit my well paid “really good” job (that I’m just so over after nearly 2 decades) to study towards a healthcare job that I feel has a sense of purpose and service to the community by helping care for our aging population, and am now only working casual jobs to support myself through uni (again).
Some days I just wonder what is the point? What is the point of all this? Some days it seems easier to fall into oblivion. But I’m going to commit to another 24 hours sober.
Sorry for the long winded post, I don’t usually talk about my fears and depression and sense of pointlessness much because I don’t want to bring the mood down but I just needed to get it off my chest. I’m not sure if this is the right place, so I’m sorry if it’s not. My husband is generally awesome but he just doesn’t “get” depression, he says “just snap out of it, you’ll be ‘right mate”. If only it was so easy to just snap out of it.
Thanks for sharing the brave girls club daily truth Bandicoot, one step.... I think I maybe can do one step, but maybe later, I’m staying in bed a bit longer for now
(((Snufkin)))
(((Free)))
Congratulations on the new (old) job Sunflowerlife, that’s so exciting!
Hugs to everyone who needs a hug today
24 hours sober please ❤️
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 8,762
Originally Posted by aussieblue
Sorry your feeling this way Willow . I hope things improve for you.
I think I’m just in a temporary exhaustion funk. It’s nearly 10 and I’m still in bed, but I’ve decided that’s actually ok. I decided I just have to cut myself some slack sometimes. I’m allowed a day off trying to do everything and keep it all together. And I feel better just having made that decision to allow myself to do nothing in particular today. My only mission today is to not drink. And maybe go for a walk ❤️
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 8,762
Originally Posted by jsm273
Willow, I was going to suggest a walk. For some reason that usually helps to clear the mind. Just don’t forget to look around and, take in your environment if you do it.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: Missouri, USA
Posts: 890
Willow, I really hope your spirits pick up. Everyone has a purpose and if you felt a calling to change jobs for one that means something to you embrace it. Many of us don’t have the courage to give up our ‘good’ Jobs so we slug along till we retire settling.
I know that drinking never made anything better for me. I’m with you today for 24 HOURS so let’s get through it! Tomorrow is another day, TODAY we focus on TODAY!
I know that drinking never made anything better for me. I’m with you today for 24 HOURS so let’s get through it! Tomorrow is another day, TODAY we focus on TODAY!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: Missouri, USA
Posts: 890
Oh.......and we got FANTASTIC NEWS TODAY!!!!
The test results for our Dear Boxer Colbie D came back NEGATIVE for CUSHINGS disease!!!! We CRIED!!!!
She is doing better already and it appears we only have the UTI to get over and we are back to normal. There is that ‘second look’ next week on the X-ray for Cancer but they didn’t really think it was anything so I am PRAYING that is NOTHING and I BELIEVE IT!
24 MORE (Again) while I am here.
The test results for our Dear Boxer Colbie D came back NEGATIVE for CUSHINGS disease!!!! We CRIED!!!!
She is doing better already and it appears we only have the UTI to get over and we are back to normal. There is that ‘second look’ next week on the X-ray for Cancer but they didn’t really think it was anything so I am PRAYING that is NOTHING and I BELIEVE IT!
24 MORE (Again) while I am here.
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 8,762
Thanks Quitter, I do feel like it’s a calling, I just question myself when things get tough.
I’m sooo glad your dear boxer Colbie D is on the mend, that’s such wonderful news ❤️
Ok I’m off for a long walk in nature to see if I can snap myself out of this funk with the help of you guys here on SR being so supportive I love you guys ❤️
I’m sooo glad your dear boxer Colbie D is on the mend, that’s such wonderful news ❤️
Ok I’m off for a long walk in nature to see if I can snap myself out of this funk
with the help of you guys here on SR being so supportive I love you guys ❤️
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,446
Originally Posted by Willow68
Sorry to be a downer but I’m having a bit of a rough spot, sensing the black hole creeping up. I don’t want to fall in, but I’ve maybe already slipped down the side a bit. I’ve been feeling it creeping up the last week or so and wondering to myself if I should seek some counselling. But it’s so expensive and hard to get into here (weeks long waiting lists) and I’m not working many hours these next few weeks so money is tight.
I really thought I was doing ok. But I was maybe in that pink cloud I’ve heard people talk about? I’ve been drinking for 30 years, pretty much daily for the last 20. But still working, studying, maintaining a semblance of normalcy throughout it all. I’m on Day 60 sober today (longest in my memory). And things have been up and down but I seemed generally to be doing pretty well I thought. But now I’m feeling like utter crap. I’m still in bed and it’s after 9am. The house guests left yesterday. I have the whole day to myself and don’t have to go anywhere thank goodness because I just cannot seem to summon the energy for anything. I’m so tired and I have a headache, probably the massive sugar pig out yesterday, ugggghhh I feel like such a slug.
After such a challenging weekend and last few days trying so hard not to drink in the face of so much temptation I have no energy or motivation for anything. Yesterday one of the relatives questioned my decision to leave my “great” job to work in aged care (they were like WT???) and now I’m questioning it all over again. It took me years to find the courage to quit my “great” job and so many people have questioned my decision, they think I’m nuts (this is quite possibly true). And now I’m questioning and second guessing everything, my life, my purpose on this planet (really what is the point of it all anyway ????). I don’t know whether my decisions about my life direction regarding work and study are the right thing to have done as I’ve created so much more work ahead for myself. I’ve made major changes in the last year and it’s sort of exciting but so scary too. A year ago I quit my well paid “really good” job (that I’m just so over after nearly 2 decades) to study towards a healthcare job that I feel has a sense of purpose and service to the community by helping care for our aging population, and am now only working casual jobs to support myself through uni (again).
Some days I just wonder what is the point? What is the point of all this? Some days it seems easier to fall into oblivion. But I’m going to commit to another 24 hours sober.
Sorry for the long winded post, I don’t usually talk about my fears and depression and sense of pointlessness much because I don’t want to bring the mood down but I just needed to get it off my chest. I’m not sure if this is the right place, so I’m sorry if it’s not. My husband is generally awesome but he just doesn’t “get” depression, he says “just snap out of it, you’ll be ‘right mate”. If only it was so easy to just snap out of it.
Thanks for sharing the brave girls club daily truth Bandicoot, one step.... I think I maybe can do one step, but maybe later, I’m staying in bed a bit longer for now
(((Snufkin)))
(((Free)))
Congratulations on the new (old) job Sunflowerlife, that’s so exciting!
Hugs to everyone who needs a hug today
24 hours sober please ❤️
I really thought I was doing ok. But I was maybe in that pink cloud I’ve heard people talk about? I’ve been drinking for 30 years, pretty much daily for the last 20. But still working, studying, maintaining a semblance of normalcy throughout it all. I’m on Day 60 sober today (longest in my memory). And things have been up and down but I seemed generally to be doing pretty well I thought. But now I’m feeling like utter crap. I’m still in bed and it’s after 9am. The house guests left yesterday. I have the whole day to myself and don’t have to go anywhere thank goodness because I just cannot seem to summon the energy for anything. I’m so tired and I have a headache, probably the massive sugar pig out yesterday, ugggghhh I feel like such a slug.
After such a challenging weekend and last few days trying so hard not to drink in the face of so much temptation I have no energy or motivation for anything. Yesterday one of the relatives questioned my decision to leave my “great” job to work in aged care (they were like WT???) and now I’m questioning it all over again. It took me years to find the courage to quit my “great” job and so many people have questioned my decision, they think I’m nuts (this is quite possibly true). And now I’m questioning and second guessing everything, my life, my purpose on this planet (really what is the point of it all anyway ????). I don’t know whether my decisions about my life direction regarding work and study are the right thing to have done as I’ve created so much more work ahead for myself. I’ve made major changes in the last year and it’s sort of exciting but so scary too. A year ago I quit my well paid “really good” job (that I’m just so over after nearly 2 decades) to study towards a healthcare job that I feel has a sense of purpose and service to the community by helping care for our aging population, and am now only working casual jobs to support myself through uni (again).
Some days I just wonder what is the point? What is the point of all this? Some days it seems easier to fall into oblivion. But I’m going to commit to another 24 hours sober.
Sorry for the long winded post, I don’t usually talk about my fears and depression and sense of pointlessness much because I don’t want to bring the mood down but I just needed to get it off my chest. I’m not sure if this is the right place, so I’m sorry if it’s not. My husband is generally awesome but he just doesn’t “get” depression, he says “just snap out of it, you’ll be ‘right mate”. If only it was so easy to just snap out of it.
Thanks for sharing the brave girls club daily truth Bandicoot, one step.... I think I maybe can do one step, but maybe later, I’m staying in bed a bit longer for now
(((Snufkin)))
(((Free)))
Congratulations on the new (old) job Sunflowerlife, that’s so exciting!
Hugs to everyone who needs a hug today
24 hours sober please ❤️
DirectLine saved my life. Along with SR. It is free, It is 24/7. The counsellors are AMAZING.
(Australian service).
DirectLine - confidential alcohol and drug counselling and referral
♥♥♥
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,446
OK.....I read.
I understand the pink cloud idea (although it didn't happen to me) and all that you have said honey....really I do. May I present a different perspective?
We/you are working HARD on our lives....whether it is this recovery or another from a different ailment....it is hard and it is involved and it takes presence of mind and lots of energy and mindfulness.
Are we not allowed to get tired?
Without all of the scary analysis?
Why can't we just say...hey.....look how hard you have been trying and how fantastic you are and how about a day off????
A day to sleep late and stay in our pj's and maybe watch way too many videos.
(I highly recommend Big Little Lies....woo hoo....so good girls)
I wish you could see how wonderfully you are doing....a bad spot is just a bad spot, and doing what you are doing career-wise is kind of sensational. We need people like us Willow.....desperately. (sorry, not being egotistical, just a passionate aged-care worker).
It will pass. Give yourself a break. Give yourself some love.
Have a chai latte.
♥♥♥
I understand the pink cloud idea (although it didn't happen to me) and all that you have said honey....really I do. May I present a different perspective?
We/you are working HARD on our lives....whether it is this recovery or another from a different ailment....it is hard and it is involved and it takes presence of mind and lots of energy and mindfulness.
Are we not allowed to get tired?
Without all of the scary analysis?
Why can't we just say...hey.....look how hard you have been trying and how fantastic you are and how about a day off????
A day to sleep late and stay in our pj's and maybe watch way too many videos.
(I highly recommend Big Little Lies....woo hoo....so good girls
)I wish you could see how wonderfully you are doing....a bad spot is just a bad spot, and doing what you are doing career-wise is kind of sensational. We need people like us Willow.....desperately. (sorry, not being egotistical, just a passionate aged-care worker).
It will pass. Give yourself a break. Give yourself some love.
Have a chai latte.
♥♥♥
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,446
♥ This is a list of everyone who posted their commitment to stay sober in the last
24 hours: 8 pm EDT ~ 7.59 pm EDT.
It is awesome to have every single one of you here with us! ♥
1newcreation
abcowboy
Alysheba
Atlast9999
aussieblue
Awake61
Babs1234
badgerden
bandicoot2
BarbieKen
BrandNewDay11
Bubovski
Canadian Koala
Caramel
CeeFarro
ChloeRose63
Coldfusion
cornpone
county111111
CrossYourHeart
Daisybelle
Dee74
Delilah1
Endoftheday
erfra7
Free2bme888
FormerBeerLover
Gabe1980
gatorman
Gilmer
Goat
goodbyeevan
goose333
Hats
Hevyn
heyfly
Jack16
joandmelandhan
jsm273
julietUK
Kaneda8888
kenton
Kris47
least
lilymaz
Lostmyoffswitch
lyddie
Mags1
Marcutah1
Neoo
Nic233
nmd
Optimist4ever57
PaigeMasters
PhoenixJ
Pinky1
Plenny
Quincy
quitter62
Rainman1
Rar
RedBerryJuniper
Rowlands1
Saskia
SaturatedSeize
Snufkin
soberista
SoberLeigh
stargazer016
Sunflower79
Sunflowerlife
Sweetpeacan
tgirl
TheToddman
theVman31
tomls
vanaprastha
venuscat
Vinificent
WaterOx
WeaverBird
Whendovescry
Willow68
wiscsober
YCDT2
Yixi
yukonm
Zanna
zeppodog
Onward together! ♥
24 hours: 8 pm EDT ~ 7.59 pm EDT.
It is awesome to have every single one of you here with us!
♥1newcreation
abcowboy
Alysheba
Atlast9999
aussieblue
Awake61
Babs1234
badgerden
bandicoot2
BarbieKen
BrandNewDay11
Bubovski
Canadian Koala
Caramel
CeeFarro
ChloeRose63
Coldfusion
cornpone
county111111
CrossYourHeart
Daisybelle
Dee74
Delilah1
Endoftheday
erfra7
Free2bme888
FormerBeerLover
Gabe1980
gatorman
Gilmer
Goat
goodbyeevan
goose333
Hats
Hevyn
heyfly
Jack16
joandmelandhan
jsm273
julietUK
Kaneda8888
kenton
Kris47
least
lilymaz
Lostmyoffswitch
lyddie
Mags1
Marcutah1
Neoo
Nic233
nmd
Optimist4ever57
PaigeMasters
PhoenixJ
Pinky1
Plenny
Quincy
quitter62
Rainman1
Rar
RedBerryJuniper
Rowlands1
Saskia
SaturatedSeize
Snufkin
soberista
SoberLeigh
stargazer016
Sunflower79
Sunflowerlife
Sweetpeacan
tgirl
TheToddman
theVman31
tomls
vanaprastha
venuscat
Vinificent
WaterOx
WeaverBird
Whendovescry
Willow68
wiscsober
YCDT2
Yixi
yukonm
Zanna
zeppodog
Onward together! ♥
July 12, 2018
goose333 ~ 11 months! ♥
BarbieKen ~ 5 years & 8 months! ♥
goose333 ~ 11 months! ♥
BarbieKen ~ 5 years & 8 months! ♥
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