Class of May 2018 Part 3
Member
Join Date: Oct 2018
Location: New Mexico
Posts: 1,339
I visited my parents today for lunch and did some small chores, nothing all too exciting, and I just have felt a little ambivalent about things, just a bit of a mood swing over the weekend that I'll let pass. Maybe I'm thinking ahead too much about what the week after next will be like instead of what tomorrow should be. 
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Location: Where I’ve longed to be all my life…..here, now.
Posts: 7,338
U2 are awesome! And mine will be the 28th of this month too
Recovering from surgery OK feeling stronger. Doing little chores here in there and trying to behave properly so that I do not use my neck in the wrong way. I really need this surgery to work.
The twins have been helping me kind of sort of, the way typical 17-year-olds in America do which is not really very much.
Yesterday I had a couple of friends bring me some soup and flowers and a sandwich. I could not really eat the sandwich but the soup was delicious and I had some for lunch today.
I was able to take a 20 minute walk today as I understand getting that blood flow to the bone graft is important for it to work. It actually makes me feel pretty good .
The ABF is back from Key West and is coming over tonight with his little dog. I used to be a dog person but not so much anymore. His dog is OK but I don’t really prefer little dogs .
Struggling in my head during these days off of work about what direction I should head in my life .
I just posted on the ‘how is the weather by you you thread’and it’s 32° and cloudy with no discernible cloud lining—- just a solid gray cover over the sky. Winds are about 7 mph. I really do need to live where the sun is , And I need to figure out how I’m going to live the last chapter of my life out.
Can you guys just give me the answers please?
Recovering from surgery OK feeling stronger. Doing little chores here in there and trying to behave properly so that I do not use my neck in the wrong way. I really need this surgery to work.
The twins have been helping me kind of sort of, the way typical 17-year-olds in America do which is not really very much.
Yesterday I had a couple of friends bring me some soup and flowers and a sandwich. I could not really eat the sandwich but the soup was delicious and I had some for lunch today.
I was able to take a 20 minute walk today as I understand getting that blood flow to the bone graft is important for it to work. It actually makes me feel pretty good .
The ABF is back from Key West and is coming over tonight with his little dog. I used to be a dog person but not so much anymore. His dog is OK but I don’t really prefer little dogs .
Struggling in my head during these days off of work about what direction I should head in my life .
I just posted on the ‘how is the weather by you you thread’and it’s 32° and cloudy with no discernible cloud lining—- just a solid gray cover over the sky. Winds are about 7 mph. I really do need to live where the sun is , And I need to figure out how I’m going to live the last chapter of my life out.
Can you guys just give me the answers please?
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 8,762
Yay Guener! What date is your 6 month? Mine is 14th only 2 more weeks for you too Free
Come to Australia Free lots of sun here
It’s interesting how major life events make us question everything isn’t it. Like your surgery Free, that’s a really big thing to face in the lead up to it, with all the fears around it, and then to actually go through it. And then the recovery too. It’s huge! And I think potentially life changing.
I stopped drinking in the lead up to my 50th birthday. Then Mum died when I was at day 100 (she was there until I reached my secret milestone when I believed I would be ok). Then Dad died. And my job finished. It’s all huge too! And now I’m also trying to work out how to live the rest of my life. It’s going to be different to the first 50 years that’s for sure. For one, my Mum and Dad are both gone
and secondly I’m sober. And thirdly I’m unemployed (kinda) for the first time in many many years. So it’s a new chapter.
Free your twins are getting to the age where they will soon be independent, which means that although you will still be a huge part of their lives (and always will) you will have a little more freedom to follow whatever dreams you choose. Perhaps go and visit some sunny places and check them out try them on for size maybe apply for some jobs. Not necessarily in the same area/field of work. Be bold, try something new. Anything you dreamt of as a little girl. Well perhaps not as a trapeze artist with your neck, but there are lots of other options Now is an opportunity to reinvent yourself if you choose to ❤️
only 2 more weeks for you too Free Come to Australia Free
lots of sun here It’s interesting how major life events make us question everything isn’t it. Like your surgery Free, that’s a really big thing to face in the lead up to it, with all the fears around it, and then to actually go through it. And then the recovery too. It’s huge! And I think potentially life changing.
I stopped drinking in the lead up to my 50th birthday. Then Mum died when I was at day 100 (she was there until I reached my secret milestone when I believed I would be ok). Then Dad died. And my job finished. It’s all huge too! And now I’m also trying to work out how to live the rest of my life. It’s going to be different to the first 50 years that’s for sure. For one, my Mum and Dad are both gone
and secondly I’m sober. And thirdly I’m unemployed (kinda) for the first time in many many years. So it’s a new chapter.Free your twins are getting to the age where they will soon be independent, which means that although you will still be a huge part of their lives (and always will) you will have a little more freedom to follow whatever dreams you choose. Perhaps go and visit some sunny places and check them out
try them on for size maybe apply for some jobs. Not necessarily in the same area/field of work. Be bold, try something new. Anything you dreamt of as a little girl. Well perhaps not as a trapeze artist with your neck, but there are lots of other options Now is an opportunity to reinvent yourself if you choose to ❤️
Member
Join Date: Oct 2018
Location: New Mexico
Posts: 1,339
Free, yes, please take good care of yourself. You are right, the blood flow to a bone graft is really important: I had a bone graft to my hip back in 2001 and was told that; so, I did my exercises all the time. I'm glad that you have some friends thinking of you to stop by with a little treat, and I hope your eating will improve as you hope it will in the days ahead.
I love the advice that Willow gives you about having some freedom ahead to do some things that will be new experiences or just to enjoy old ones in different ways. For me, at 53, I've got some time ahead to do some things over in the right ways and am just as much as you are seeking out answers to questions on me and on life. But tonight's thinking will be limited to some time here and doing a crossword.
I'm one day behind you, Willow, and we are just barely ahead of Free, so the next two weeks will be a time of great accomplishments. It seems like a long time since I quit, but the months have also been dreamlike.
I love the advice that Willow gives you about having some freedom ahead to do some things that will be new experiences or just to enjoy old ones in different ways. For me, at 53, I've got some time ahead to do some things over in the right ways and am just as much as you are seeking out answers to questions on me and on life. But tonight's thinking will be limited to some time here and doing a crossword.
I'm one day behind you, Willow, and we are just barely ahead of Free, so the next two weeks will be a time of great accomplishments.
It seems like a long time since I quit, but the months have also been dreamlike.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2018
Location: New Mexico
Posts: 1,339
I got home for an early lunch, and the day is passing by quickly. I go see my therapist for the first time in a couple months or so, so that should be interesting. She will be happy to know that I have added SR to my repertoire of alcohol abstinence. I am sure that I will have paperwork to do there that helps to measure my levels of negative thinking, looking forward to the results.
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 8,762
I had a big meltdown yesterday, lots of tears, missing Mum so much. It’s 12 weeks now and the pain is still so hard to bear. I’m grateful she’s no longer in any pain and she’s safe with her own parents now, in God’s care, but I miss her so much
But it’s my 6 monthiversary sober today, so that’s rather exciting
But it’s my 6 monthiversary sober today, so that’s rather exciting
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Location: Where I’ve longed to be all my life…..here, now.
Posts: 7,338
Oooooooo willow!!!!!!
Congratulations on your six months today that is so freaking awesome
I’m glad you are allowing yourself to feel those feelings about your mom. It really does hurt forever but the hurt gets better. I still sometimes break into a cry about my mom and it’s been since 1998.
You and Guener come over to my house tomorrow to celebrate our half years—pretty sure I’ll make mine too.
I’ll fix you both tea and Biscoff biscuits (yay finally got them in U.S.). We will chat around the fire.
Controlled Fires help with positive feelings Guener. Not a scientific fact-just a gut feeling.
Congratulations on your six months today that is so freaking awesome
I’m glad you are allowing yourself to feel those feelings about your mom. It really does hurt forever but the hurt gets better. I still sometimes break into a cry about my mom and it’s been since 1998.
You and Guener come over to my house tomorrow to celebrate our half years—pretty sure I’ll make mine too.
I’ll fix you both tea and Biscoff biscuits (yay finally got them in U.S.). We will chat around the fire.
Controlled Fires help with positive feelings Guener. Not a scientific fact-just a gut feeling.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2018
Location: New Mexico
Posts: 1,339
Willow, a big round of applause on making it to your six month rite of passage, it's really nice to be able to share that with you this month. So, the first part of the mountain pass has been traversed, and it just keeps going to the other side of a year ahead. Nicely done.
Free, that looks so nice, especially since it has been abnormally cold here in NM where I am. I like Biscoff cookies, even after plane-full loads of them back in the days when I traveled, and they are good with tea! Envious of your fire.
Free, that looks so nice, especially since it has been abnormally cold here in NM where I am. I like Biscoff cookies, even after plane-full loads of them back in the days when I traveled, and they are good with tea! Envious of your fire.
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 8,762
Thanks
and congratulations on your 6 months Guener!
You’re not far away Free!
Hooray for the aMAYzing class of May.
It kinda looks like we three are the only ones left in the class...
Yoohoo!
Anyone else lurking out there?
and congratulations on your 6 months Guener!
You’re not far away Free!
Hooray for the aMAYzing class of May.
It kinda looks like we three are the only ones left in the class...
Yoohoo!
Anyone else lurking out there?
Member
Join Date: Oct 2018
Location: New Mexico
Posts: 1,339
It's hard to believe it has been half a year, but in some ways it feels a lot longer, too. And soon we will be the three in the class, unless somebody is holding their breath out there? Free, you have the baton on the track, and we are yelling our lungs out cheering you to the "finish".
I've been so busy these past two days, it has been easy to focus on things other than any idea of what it was like while drinking -- until I lie down to rest for the night and am happy another day went by without a drink.
Thoughts of peace and warmth to you both!
I've been so busy these past two days, it has been easy to focus on things other than any idea of what it was like while drinking -- until I lie down to rest for the night and am happy another day went by without a drink.
Thoughts of peace and warmth to you both!
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Location: Hillsboro Oregon
Posts: 154
Guener, Willow and Free, i have read your posts and I see my life in tghem. Lost my Dad in 2003 and my Mom about a year and a half. As Willow stated we get used to the new normal. Then life takes a few more twists and turns, I turned 65 on October 8 and got laid off from work 10 days later. Lost a third of my income in one easy statement, "thanks for your years of service". We make just enough to cover the bills and thats it. A long as we do not have any emergencies we should be ok. I have to wait only 11 more months before retirements kick in. then we will be ok. Had a couple of interviews for jobs with less pay but I can see it in their eyes that I am older than they thought. One place said that it would be an insult to me to hire me at the pay they were advertising. I said it's ok, I have been insulted far worse before. I stopped drinking May 5th and made it until the next day when I decided to do something stupid and drank. Another 5 days and it will be a month dry again.
Sorry about running on, All of that to say congratulations to all of you who reached milestones!
Sorry about running on, All of that to say congratulations to all of you who reached milestones!
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Location: Where I’ve longed to be all my life…..here, now.
Posts: 7,338
Thanks for the update Marcutah. Sorry your going through a rough time, but glad you are able to squeak by financially for now.
Willow and guener, thanks for the kind words! We got this—-
You too Marcutah. Drinking doesn’t help anything get better.....😊
Night hugs,
Willow and guener, thanks for the kind words! We got this—-
You too Marcutah. Drinking doesn’t help anything get better.....😊
Night hugs,
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