Class of April 2018 Part 4
Member
Join Date: Feb 2018
Posts: 182
Evening Peeps,
Well it's been a crappy week & I'm pleased it's Friday & I can close a door on it !
On a positive note all the stress has miraculously shrunk my waist line & l've dropped 5lbs !
I'm petite like you Daisy just 5 foot so this weight loss has spurred me on !
Both kids have had exams this week ..eldest GCSEs & youngest end of term year
7 exams.
The teenage hormones have been flying all over the place ... my lovely 12 year daughter has turned into Jekyll & Hyde ..quite literally over night !
I'm actually looking forward to my little break with my mum now...the thought of
Not cooking or running the kids about & working of course sounds rather appealing !
I'm still worried about drinking though ..because the thought of a sunshine holiday minus booze still sounds utterly impossible.
The old av is already whispering have a Pina Colda no will know.
Right now I'm still taking each day at a time ..it's the only way I've managed to
get this far..
Anyway enough of the moaning ..hope everyone has a lovely relaxing weekend
Xx
I've got to alter my mind set...
Well it's been a crappy week & I'm pleased it's Friday & I can close a door on it !
On a positive note all the stress has miraculously shrunk my waist line & l've dropped 5lbs !
I'm petite like you Daisy just 5 foot so this weight loss has spurred me on !
Both kids have had exams this week ..eldest GCSEs & youngest end of term year
7 exams.
The teenage hormones have been flying all over the place ... my lovely 12 year daughter has turned into Jekyll & Hyde ..quite literally over night !
I'm actually looking forward to my little break with my mum now...the thought of
Not cooking or running the kids about & working of course sounds rather appealing !
I'm still worried about drinking though ..because the thought of a sunshine holiday minus booze still sounds utterly impossible.
The old av is already whispering have a Pina Colda no will know.
Right now I'm still taking each day at a time ..it's the only way I've managed to
get this far..
Anyway enough of the moaning ..hope everyone has a lovely relaxing weekend
Xx
I've got to alter my mind set...
Member
Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 199
Hello April lovlies!
Happy Friday to all!
It's been a rough week with these shocking celebrity suicides
Certainly a hard reminder that fame, money, love don't make us any less human or any less susceptible to anxiety, depression or addiction.
I'd like to share something else that happened this week. So, shortly after the memorial I attended on Tuesday, a friend of mine sent me text indicating that she was leaving this world and that she was sorry, etc.. She's also battling addiction (benzos & alcohol) but she has threatened suicide to me well over 10 times in the course of about 3 years. She relapses every month (like clockwork) when she picks up her Rx, she drinks and takes a month worth of the pills and drinks with them. She then suffers withdrawals, isolation, depression etc until she picks up Rx again - it's truly the definition of insanity. I know it all too well myself.
This time however, I realize that I cannot be her enabler any longer. I cannot continue in this co-dependent friendship. The HUGE difference between us is that she does not put any effort into her recovery or sobriety. I have offered a myriad of tools for her to try out, but at this point I think (very sadly) that it is futile.
So after her texts to me about suicide, I felt she was likely feeling like she wanted to die, but knew in my heart she wouldn't. A classic case of "crying wolf". Also, I've become desensitized a bit. I texted her and told her I loved her and I believed in her but that only SHE could save herself and I said I hoped she didn't do anything to hurt herself. I thought about calling the police, but realized I don't even have her address!! I had just rekindled our friendship a few months ago after cutting off contact (I've had to do this a few times).
The next day she texted and said "Sorry, I slipped but have no plans to keep sliding". I didn't even know what to say. I realize that I have pushed plenty of friends and family away with my drunken antics etc... BUT, the healthy ones left my life until I got my S*@t together and well, the unhealthy ones stayed and got messed up right along with me.
I knew I had a decision to make and it wasn't an easy one. I have to move on from that friendship until she gets some help. It's been like "groundhog day" for years. I must protect the positive energy I work so hard to cultivate. I'd feel differently is she was making any effort to change and shift from the victim role, i.e. - I am taking a break from our friendship, so she believes I am "abandoning" her. She got fired because she rarely worked, but "I cannot believe they did this to me".
I am sorry but it is too much for me. Yet, a part of me feels guilty for NOT feeling guilty?! What a strange feeling! I feel like an albatross is off my neck. I love her and hope she gets help because she's truly an good human being, but she is ruining her life and it's too hard to bear witness any longer.
I know this may sound hypocritical to some...
Can anyone relate to this? Please share your stories
Big hugs to all! x
Happy Friday to all!
It's been a rough week with these shocking celebrity suicides
Certainly a hard reminder that fame, money, love don't make us any less human or any less susceptible to anxiety, depression or addiction. I'd like to share something else that happened this week. So, shortly after the memorial I attended on Tuesday, a friend of mine sent me text indicating that she was leaving this world and that she was sorry, etc.. She's also battling addiction (benzos & alcohol) but she has threatened suicide to me well over 10 times in the course of about 3 years. She relapses every month (like clockwork) when she picks up her Rx, she drinks and takes a month worth of the pills and drinks with them. She then suffers withdrawals, isolation, depression etc until she picks up Rx again - it's truly the definition of insanity. I know it all too well myself.
This time however, I realize that I cannot be her enabler any longer. I cannot continue in this co-dependent friendship. The HUGE difference between us is that she does not put any effort into her recovery or sobriety. I have offered a myriad of tools for her to try out, but at this point I think (very sadly) that it is futile.
So after her texts to me about suicide, I felt she was likely feeling like she wanted to die, but knew in my heart she wouldn't. A classic case of "crying wolf". Also, I've become desensitized a bit. I texted her and told her I loved her and I believed in her but that only SHE could save herself and I said I hoped she didn't do anything to hurt herself. I thought about calling the police, but realized I don't even have her address!! I had just rekindled our friendship a few months ago after cutting off contact (I've had to do this a few times).
The next day she texted and said "Sorry, I slipped but have no plans to keep sliding". I didn't even know what to say. I realize that I have pushed plenty of friends and family away with my drunken antics etc... BUT, the healthy ones left my life until I got my S*@t together and well, the unhealthy ones stayed and got messed up right along with me.
I knew I had a decision to make and it wasn't an easy one. I have to move on from that friendship until she gets some help. It's been like "groundhog day" for years. I must protect the positive energy I work so hard to cultivate. I'd feel differently is she was making any effort to change and shift from the victim role, i.e. - I am taking a break from our friendship, so she believes I am "abandoning" her. She got fired because she rarely worked, but "I cannot believe they did this to me".
I am sorry but it is too much for me. Yet, a part of me feels guilty for NOT feeling guilty?! What a strange feeling! I feel like an albatross is off my neck. I love her and hope she gets help because she's truly an good human being, but she is ruining her life and it's too hard to bear witness any longer.
I know this may sound hypocritical to some...
Can anyone relate to this? Please share your stories
Big hugs to all! x
Member
Join Date: Apr 2018
Location: Cheshire. U.K
Posts: 8,003
Oh no I can't believe that I was just ending my post and I closed the page by mistake and lost it all. Dam. Here we go again.
Good morning Aprils
I hope you are all well and sober and having the best weekend. I didn't post last night as I took my g.son up to bed, read him a story, lay beside him for a cuddle and woke up at quarter to midnight, woops.
I feel like I'm on holiday this morning as I don't have to do the 'mum run' she's going on a day trip with the ladies she has coffee with every morning in Thornton's coffee shop and I'm not on cat duty as my daughter's mum in law is doing it this morning. All good stuff.
My husband has to go on a driving awareness course this afternoon because he was caught speeding, 10 m.p,h over the limit. He says it's my fault as it happened after he stormed out of the house the morning after he found my hidden bottle of wine. I've checked the dates and he was actually caught a week later, but if it makes him happy to blame me, fine. I shall bite my tongue this time!
Morning Donny, I hope you're okay, you've been on my mind, stay strong my love. How was the flea market, did you find any bargains? I quite like going round flea markets now and again, it's surprising what you can pick up.
Thank you for that information Lessgravity, very helpful. I see that Dee has removed the link, probably because it was linked to Amazon, but I did see it before it was removed. x
Good morning Rowlands and I'm sorry you've had so much stress going on, but envious that you've lost 5 lbs, bonus! We can't afford to carry much weight when we're short, I bet some of those fur babies you walk are bigger than you lol. I'm struggling with my weight a bit, I'm eating rubbish the way I drank, like there's no tomorrow. I seriously need to work on it.
Teenage hormones
, you have my deepest sympathy.
I'm sure you'll be fine on holiday, could you maybe tell your mum before you go that you won't be drinking for whatever reason? That's what I did with mine, I told her I wouldn't be drinking as it interfered with my medication ( which it does), that way she wasn't asking me to have a drink or asking why I wasn't drinking. It worked anyway.
Bluesey, thank you for sharing that candid post. You are absolutely 100% right in putting yourself first in this situation, When you are working through your recovery, learning the process, you need to be able to recognize that you deserve to be in recovery. You deserve to live your life with much less stress and you deserve to overcome your addiction. You can't let a toxic relationship ruin it for you.
I have only my experiences with my son to share with you. Sadly, he is a highly toxic person He was and I think possibly still is addicted to cocaine and amphetamines, it's like he's had a full frontal lobotomy, he has had had 3 psychotic experiences that I know of, each time threatening suicide, the last time he was texting me constantly with threats, pleads, abuse, all emotional blackmail, I know the powers that be advise you to take these threats seriously and report them however I didn't call the police as I knew he was crying wolf and wouldn't do it. His love interest at that time did call the police and they rushed to his flat and broke the door down on getting no answer. He had gone out to the pub for a pint, he was fine, not one bit remorseful and told the police he only did it as he was cross because he'd been dumped by the g.friend. I wish they'd sectioned him but they just gave him a good talking to. In hindsight I wish I'd called the police when he was texting me, because although they are adept at crying wolf there could be that one time when they go a step further. If it happens again, I will call the police and I would advise you to do so too. I have had to learn to detach myself from him as much as I possibly can and to be honest if it wasn't for my little grandson, I would detach myself completely. It breaks my heart to say that, but that's the way it is. I hope this all makes sense, I'm not as good as you as writing down my feelings. I send you my love though and a big cyber hug.
I'm a bit concerned Aprils, because our Strawberry hasn't posted the last couple of days, have you heard anything Suze?
Erratic too, are you ok?
Right I'd best go now but I'll be back. I hope you all have a better day than yesterday.
Thought for today....Alcohol takes you to hell, disguised as heaven!
Good morning Aprils
I hope you are all well and sober and having the best weekend. I didn't post last night as I took my g.son up to bed, read him a story, lay beside him for a cuddle and woke up at quarter to midnight, woops.
I feel like I'm on holiday this morning as I don't have to do the 'mum run' she's going on a day trip with the ladies she has coffee with every morning in Thornton's coffee shop and I'm not on cat duty as my daughter's mum in law is doing it this morning. All good stuff.
My husband has to go on a driving awareness course this afternoon because he was caught speeding, 10 m.p,h over the limit. He says it's my fault as it happened after he stormed out of the house the morning after he found my hidden bottle of wine. I've checked the dates and he was actually caught a week later, but if it makes him happy to blame me, fine. I shall bite my tongue this time!
Morning Donny, I hope you're okay, you've been on my mind, stay strong my love. How was the flea market, did you find any bargains? I quite like going round flea markets now and again, it's surprising what you can pick up.
Thank you for that information Lessgravity, very helpful. I see that Dee has removed the link, probably because it was linked to Amazon, but I did see it before it was removed. x
Good morning Rowlands and I'm sorry you've had so much stress going on, but envious that you've lost 5 lbs, bonus! We can't afford to carry much weight when we're short, I bet some of those fur babies you walk are bigger than you lol. I'm struggling with my weight a bit, I'm eating rubbish the way I drank, like there's no tomorrow. I seriously need to work on it.
Teenage hormones
, you have my deepest sympathy. I'm sure you'll be fine on holiday, could you maybe tell your mum before you go that you won't be drinking for whatever reason? That's what I did with mine, I told her I wouldn't be drinking as it interfered with my medication ( which it does), that way she wasn't asking me to have a drink or asking why I wasn't drinking. It worked anyway.
Bluesey, thank you for sharing that candid post. You are absolutely 100% right in putting yourself first in this situation, When you are working through your recovery, learning the process, you need to be able to recognize that you deserve to be in recovery. You deserve to live your life with much less stress and you deserve to overcome your addiction. You can't let a toxic relationship ruin it for you.
I have only my experiences with my son to share with you. Sadly, he is a highly toxic person He was and I think possibly still is addicted to cocaine and amphetamines, it's like he's had a full frontal lobotomy, he has had had 3 psychotic experiences that I know of, each time threatening suicide, the last time he was texting me constantly with threats, pleads, abuse, all emotional blackmail, I know the powers that be advise you to take these threats seriously and report them however I didn't call the police as I knew he was crying wolf and wouldn't do it. His love interest at that time did call the police and they rushed to his flat and broke the door down on getting no answer. He had gone out to the pub for a pint, he was fine, not one bit remorseful and told the police he only did it as he was cross because he'd been dumped by the g.friend. I wish they'd sectioned him but they just gave him a good talking to. In hindsight I wish I'd called the police when he was texting me, because although they are adept at crying wolf there could be that one time when they go a step further. If it happens again, I will call the police and I would advise you to do so too. I have had to learn to detach myself from him as much as I possibly can and to be honest if it wasn't for my little grandson, I would detach myself completely. It breaks my heart to say that, but that's the way it is. I hope this all makes sense, I'm not as good as you as writing down my feelings. I send you my love though and a big cyber hug.
I'm a bit concerned Aprils, because our Strawberry hasn't posted the last couple of days, have you heard anything Suze?
Erratic too, are you ok?
Right I'd best go now but I'll be back. I hope you all have a better day than yesterday.
Thought for today....Alcohol takes you to hell, disguised as heaven!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2017
Posts: 591
Morning mum, your Donnyboy is all good and sober this morning 😊 The flea market was fun, although my dad drives me crazy at times! He complains constantly of not getting out of the house,but when we do get out he spends 30 min looking then is ready to go!! This place is huge and we could have spent most of the day looking, but not my dear old dad🙄 I did get plenty’s of veggies and prepped some eggplant parmigiana last night to bake today. Also there are a lot of Amish folks there selling there baked goods which are sooooo good!! All made from scratch and I’m sure 10,000 calories but whatever! It’s a beautiful day here and I think my girlfriend and I might pack up either the bikes or kayaks and spend the day outside. I will not drink today.
I looked back also and did notice mum that some of us have gone missing for a few days. I know sometimes Strawberry is just so busy with life, kids, farm, but you all better check in!! We love each and everyone of you!! 💜💜
I looked back also and did notice mum that some of us have gone missing for a few days. I know sometimes Strawberry is just so busy with life, kids, farm, but you all better check in!! We love each and everyone of you!! 💜💜
Say cheese!
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Scotland
Posts: 3,379
Hey peeps x sry haven't been on. have been totally bz with daughter and grandson and travelling up to my home which the train was a nightmare but grandson was good. will catch up more when i can. little family will be going home Monday evening so i should be back regular x
hope u are all doing good and will read all the past posts when i can also. have great weekend if u can. hugs xx
hope u are all doing good and will read all the past posts when i can also. have great weekend if u can. hugs xx
Member
Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 199
Good morning ! Happy Saturday to all!
Dearest Daisybelle, I'm happy to hear that you finally have a little time sans the daily duties you've been carrying out for a while now - hope you are enjoying the break and doing something nice for yourself.
As far as your hubby blaming you for his speeding, well let's just say that by biting your tongue you are likely avoiding a drama that will just bring up old stuff that will do nothing productive for either of you!! I know it's probably hard to not call him out (I know it would be for me !), but in early recovery especially it's best to choose our battles wisely. As you are today! Bravo!
Thank you for sharing these stories about your son and I am so very sorry you've had to endure this pain as a mother. It's quite heartbreaking actually. It's really something when we become almost desensitized to something so intense. I'm convinced that is only way the brain can cope with such constant strife. I hope he is able to find a way out for everyones sake and break these destructive habits that cause so much pain for you and your family. Sending you love & healing thoughts today. Have lovely weekend! xo
DonnyB, I LOVE those markets. The fresh breads are my fav! Cinnamon or chocolate bread to be specific. Oh and the homeade pastas!! I could live on carbs alone.. hehe! It's nice that you spent some time with your dad, albeit a short stint to the market. Have a lovely, happy and healthy weekend and enjoy your eggplant parm! I'm sooo hungry right now (See Daisy, you are not alone!! Food monger over here in CA too!
)
I've noticed a lot of our peeps are not as active last couple days. Hope everyone is doing OK and please check in soon!
Days: 68
Hours: 1,639
Minutes: 98,399
Dearest Daisybelle, I'm happy to hear that you finally have a little time sans the daily duties you've been carrying out for a while now - hope you are enjoying the break and doing something nice for yourself.
As far as your hubby blaming you for his speeding, well let's just say that by biting your tongue you are likely avoiding a drama that will just bring up old stuff that will do nothing productive for either of you!! I know it's probably hard to not call him out (I know it would be for me !), but in early recovery especially it's best to choose our battles wisely. As you are today! Bravo!
Thank you for sharing these stories about your son and I am so very sorry you've had to endure this pain as a mother. It's quite heartbreaking actually. It's really something when we become almost desensitized to something so intense. I'm convinced that is only way the brain can cope with such constant strife. I hope he is able to find a way out for everyones sake and break these destructive habits that cause so much pain for you and your family. Sending you love & healing thoughts today. Have lovely weekend! xo
DonnyB, I LOVE those markets. The fresh breads are my fav! Cinnamon or chocolate bread to be specific. Oh and the homeade pastas!! I could live on carbs alone.. hehe! It's nice that you spent some time with your dad, albeit a short stint to the market. Have a lovely, happy and healthy weekend and enjoy your eggplant parm! I'm sooo hungry right now (See Daisy, you are not alone!! Food monger over here in CA too!
)I've noticed a lot of our peeps are not as active last couple days. Hope everyone is doing OK and please check in soon!
Days: 68
Hours: 1,639
Minutes: 98,399
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: Iowa
Posts: 627
56 Days
Hello April peeps! How is everyone? I was wondering if we could do another roll call? Who is still with us and what is your sobriety date?
I apologize for not being out here daily. I'm afraid the vertigo caused my Hashimoto's to flare up which causes me extreme fatigue. It has taken everything I have to get ready for work in the morning. The good news is I went in for lab work and my numbers reflect how I'm feeling so the doctor made some dosage changes to my meds. I should be feeling better in a few days.
The only good thing about this flare up is I haven't felt like doing ANyTHiNG...not even drinking! lol
Daisy - the grocery store has always been a trigger for me as well...good on you for getting out of there quick!
Donny - how are you? Do you have a plan in place? I'm thinking of you and hoping this is the time it sticks for you.
So about a year ago I had something really bad happen as a result of drinking. It was a usual Friday.....loved to start drinking in the afternoon, no food in the belly so booze went right to my head. I drank my share of beer before breaking into the whisky. I was properly smashed. Typical. My son had a friend over for the night. I remember very vaguely waking up and stumbling into the living room to check on my son and his friend. The next thing I remember I was laying on my belly in my bedroom. No clue how/why I was there. I remember getting up and thinking my head felt funny but I was so out of it I got to my bed and passed back out. In the morning I woke up and saw blood on my shirt. Having no idea what was going on I went into the bathroom where to my horror I saw a gash above my eye. Somehow and somewhere when I got up I must have fell and hit my head. To this day I have no idea where, how, where or when. I ended up having to go to the dr where he kindly told me I could have killed myself and ordered rehab.
Well I went to outpatient rehab exactly one day and was drinking a few weeks later.
I'm reflecting on this because vertigo hit me the first time as a result of this fall and I still get it at times a year later. Having vertigo last week was a strong and sad reminder of what alcohol does to me. I still have a scar above my eye to remind me to.
Here's the thing. It didn't scare me to stop. Bad things, hangovers, none of it keeps you from drinking. The ONLY way to find long lasting sobriety is to ACCEPT that you cannot drink and find acceptance with it. Sobriety is an opportunity. It is not a sacrifice. As long as you think it is you will struggle to stay sober.
So I say all of this to make sure my April family knows how important it is to have a plan and work your plan everyday. Your days will start piling up and your sober musles will get stronger and stronger.
I'm rooting for each one of you. Take care. <3
I apologize for not being out here daily. I'm afraid the vertigo caused my Hashimoto's to flare up which causes me extreme fatigue. It has taken everything I have to get ready for work in the morning. The good news is I went in for lab work and my numbers reflect how I'm feeling so the doctor made some dosage changes to my meds. I should be feeling better in a few days.
The only good thing about this flare up is I haven't felt like doing ANyTHiNG...not even drinking! lol
Daisy - the grocery store has always been a trigger for me as well...good on you for getting out of there quick!
Donny - how are you? Do you have a plan in place? I'm thinking of you and hoping this is the time it sticks for you.
So about a year ago I had something really bad happen as a result of drinking. It was a usual Friday.....loved to start drinking in the afternoon, no food in the belly so booze went right to my head. I drank my share of beer before breaking into the whisky. I was properly smashed. Typical. My son had a friend over for the night. I remember very vaguely waking up and stumbling into the living room to check on my son and his friend. The next thing I remember I was laying on my belly in my bedroom. No clue how/why I was there. I remember getting up and thinking my head felt funny but I was so out of it I got to my bed and passed back out. In the morning I woke up and saw blood on my shirt. Having no idea what was going on I went into the bathroom where to my horror I saw a gash above my eye. Somehow and somewhere when I got up I must have fell and hit my head. To this day I have no idea where, how, where or when. I ended up having to go to the dr where he kindly told me I could have killed myself and ordered rehab.
Well I went to outpatient rehab exactly one day and was drinking a few weeks later.
I'm reflecting on this because vertigo hit me the first time as a result of this fall and I still get it at times a year later. Having vertigo last week was a strong and sad reminder of what alcohol does to me. I still have a scar above my eye to remind me to.
Here's the thing. It didn't scare me to stop. Bad things, hangovers, none of it keeps you from drinking. The ONLY way to find long lasting sobriety is to ACCEPT that you cannot drink and find acceptance with it. Sobriety is an opportunity. It is not a sacrifice. As long as you think it is you will struggle to stay sober.
So I say all of this to make sure my April family knows how important it is to have a plan and work your plan everyday. Your days will start piling up and your sober musles will get stronger and stronger.
I'm rooting for each one of you. Take care. <3
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Location: Hillsboro Oregon
Posts: 154
Bluesymusey, I just left this post on another thread for someone who is in the same situation. (Gotta love relationships). JJWinters, I was in your position a long time ago. I was head over heels for this girl. I did see the sign on our first but I thought it was just to cover up the jitters. We reallly liked each other. Fast forward 9 months later and I had to get out with my sanity and self esteem. Last I heard about her a few weeks later, she had put her brand new car in the ditch just like we had talked about. I left someone I really cared about but I had a huge burden lifted off my shoulders. it was one of the hardest decisions I have ever made even to this date. But it was the best decision I made because I was being dragged down with her. A couple of years later I met another girl whom I was doubly crazy about. We just celebrated 22 years of marriage. I am here because I became alcoholic husband. Go figure.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Northeast, US
Posts: 2,073
Sober... today anyway. Ooofffff.
I had a long successful day and it didn’t end the way it should have.
Alright, I’ve got the help I need coming around to get to my goals. I just need to do something. Make a darn move. I’m craving excitement, adventure, and adrenaline, not booze. Also some intimacy with a woman. My lord it’s been been lonely.
I’m watching some TV. I’ll be in bed soon. It’s 9 now.
Viper
I had a long successful day and it didn’t end the way it should have.
Alright, I’ve got the help I need coming around to get to my goals. I just need to do something. Make a darn move. I’m craving excitement, adventure, and adrenaline, not booze. Also some intimacy with a woman. My lord it’s been been lonely.
I’m watching some TV. I’ll be in bed soon. It’s 9 now.
Viper
Member
Join Date: May 2018
Posts: 3
Very close to acting on thoughts to drink today. Im just at 8 weeks sober.
My mind was doing the old 'it'll just be a once off'
It seems boredom has become a real trigger. I'm trying to keep busy but after 10 years heavy drinking I am quite isolated from other people which makes it hard. I have been walking 1 hour every day which has been a positive.
Anyway I found that by not acting on the thoughts they do go away
My mind was doing the old 'it'll just be a once off'
It seems boredom has become a real trigger. I'm trying to keep busy but after 10 years heavy drinking I am quite isolated from other people which makes it hard. I have been walking 1 hour every day which has been a positive.
Anyway I found that by not acting on the thoughts they do go away
Member
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 2,583
Originally Posted by thequikbrownfox 
Very close to acting on thoughts to drink today. Im just at 8 weeks sober.
My mind was doing the old 'it'll just be a once off'
It seems boredom has become a real trigger. I'm trying to keep busy but after 10 years heavy drinking I am quite isolated from other people which makes it hard. I have been walking 1 hour every day which has been a positive.
Anyway I found that by not acting on the thoughts they do go away
My mind was doing the old 'it'll just be a once off'
It seems boredom has become a real trigger. I'm trying to keep busy but after 10 years heavy drinking I am quite isolated from other people which makes it hard. I have been walking 1 hour every day which has been a positive.
Anyway I found that by not acting on the thoughts they do go away
Member
Join Date: Apr 2018
Location: Cheshire. U.K
Posts: 8,003
09.36
65
Good morning Aprils,
I hope you're all well and sober and enjoying the weekend.
I can't post much at this moment as I have a house full, but I'll be back at some point later. All is good.
K.girl count me in please. Daisy, sober date 6th April 2018.
Thought for the day, I like this one....
Recovery bought my head outta my ass, just for today I no longer live in a world of sh*t. Xx
65
Good morning Aprils,
I hope you're all well and sober and enjoying the weekend.
I can't post much at this moment as I have a house full, but I'll be back at some point later. All is good.
K.girl count me in please. Daisy, sober date 6th April 2018.
Thought for the day, I like this one....
Recovery bought my head outta my ass, just for today I no longer live in a world of sh*t. Xx
Member
Join Date: Nov 2017
Posts: 2,583
Morning everyone,
All okay my end. Finished my training on Friday thank goodness it's all over for another year. What happened on Thursday seems so remote and insignificant now but imagine if I had drank over that? I would still be feeling the ramifications now even though what was bothering me is not important any more. Food for thought?
We went to my brothers for the day yesterday. He has been trying to cut back his drinking by having beer instead of red wine (Yep been there done that) and as we know, changing drinks doesn't help or last and yesterday he was back to the vino tinto and constantly had a glass in his hand. I was well armed with my San pellegrino's . We were staying at my sisters the night and she likes to drink too and she has been very supportive of me so I thought she may not drink but she soon had a wine in her hand even tho she was driving so I knew she would drink in the evening and it irritated me as she knows how bad I was plus her boyfriend is in AA also. I did actually think I would just go home but in the end decided to stay and we left my brothers and went and got food and she got a bottle of wine. I was okay but a slight thought was there as of course I always used to drink with her. Anyway after my daughter went to bed we sat and chatted and we were talking get about my brothers drinking which we are both concerned about and then I explained my feelings to her and that I thought it would have been supportive of her to have not drank last night. I don't want to tell people what to do or whether they can drink or not but did she really have to drink last night? She did apologise to me but it goes to show how broad addiction is. I mean, she is not an alcoholic but she is clearly addicted enough to have not gone one night without alcohol to support me. It's done now but as much as I love my brother and sister I may even have to stay away for a while.
Something else happened ... I sent a text to a girl who I have met in my AA group to see how she was as I hadn't seen her for a while and guess what?? She is drinking again. I didn't really know what to do so I spoke to my sponsor and her advice was to protect myself and my sobriety. She said the girl who had relapsed knows what to do, she knows what the solution is and she has a sponsor. She said she knows it is hard as we want to help when someone relapses but that when someone is actively drinking then there is not much we can do to help other than to suggest going to a meeting with them. She said I will come across this a lot but my priority had got to be myself and she is right. Bluesy, maybe that will help you with your situation too.
Hi to everyone else well done Viper and Donny for getting through sober.
Have a nice Sunday everyone.
X X
All okay my end. Finished my training on Friday thank goodness it's all over for another year. What happened on Thursday seems so remote and insignificant now but imagine if I had drank over that? I would still be feeling the ramifications now even though what was bothering me is not important any more. Food for thought?
We went to my brothers for the day yesterday. He has been trying to cut back his drinking by having beer instead of red wine (Yep been there done that) and as we know, changing drinks doesn't help or last and yesterday he was back to the vino tinto and constantly had a glass in his hand. I was well armed with my San pellegrino's . We were staying at my sisters the night and she likes to drink too and she has been very supportive of me so I thought she may not drink but she soon had a wine in her hand even tho she was driving so I knew she would drink in the evening and it irritated me as she knows how bad I was plus her boyfriend is in AA also. I did actually think I would just go home but in the end decided to stay and we left my brothers and went and got food and she got a bottle of wine. I was okay but a slight thought was there as of course I always used to drink with her. Anyway after my daughter went to bed we sat and chatted and we were talking get about my brothers drinking which we are both concerned about and then I explained my feelings to her and that I thought it would have been supportive of her to have not drank last night. I don't want to tell people what to do or whether they can drink or not but did she really have to drink last night? She did apologise to me but it goes to show how broad addiction is. I mean, she is not an alcoholic but she is clearly addicted enough to have not gone one night without alcohol to support me. It's done now but as much as I love my brother and sister I may even have to stay away for a while.
Something else happened ... I sent a text to a girl who I have met in my AA group to see how she was as I hadn't seen her for a while and guess what?? She is drinking again. I didn't really know what to do so I spoke to my sponsor and her advice was to protect myself and my sobriety. She said the girl who had relapsed knows what to do, she knows what the solution is and she has a sponsor. She said she knows it is hard as we want to help when someone relapses but that when someone is actively drinking then there is not much we can do to help other than to suggest going to a meeting with them. She said I will come across this a lot but my priority had got to be myself and she is right. Bluesy, maybe that will help you with your situation too.
Hi to everyone else well done Viper and Donny for getting through sober.
Have a nice Sunday everyone.
X X
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: Iowa
Posts: 627
How is everyone? Who is all with us these days? I encourage all of you that are here to pop in and say hi. Having a sober community is such an important part of recovery. I hope everyone is doing well, has their plans in place and is working those plans daily.
What resources is everyone using besides SR? I continue to listen to Recovery Elevator podcast (I highly recommend this!). I am reading "Sober is the New Black" and "Gentle Path through the 12 Steps". Next up after Sober is the New Black is Russel Brands Recovery book. I have a sober app that counts my days and provides inspirational quotes.
Other parts of my day include journaling/reflecting and praying. I have had days here and there where I've added exercise (beyond walking my dogs) and eating well. These are two areas I want to do better in but I figure baby steps. The single most important thing to me is to remain sober....one day at a time. I am still mentally working on myself to get to an AA meeting as well. I understand sobriety needs community...I really want to surround myself with other sober people. I'll get there...eventually.
What are you guys doing as part of your plan?
What resources is everyone using besides SR? I continue to listen to Recovery Elevator podcast (I highly recommend this!). I am reading "Sober is the New Black" and "Gentle Path through the 12 Steps". Next up after Sober is the New Black is Russel Brands Recovery book. I have a sober app that counts my days and provides inspirational quotes.
Other parts of my day include journaling/reflecting and praying. I have had days here and there where I've added exercise (beyond walking my dogs) and eating well. These are two areas I want to do better in but I figure baby steps. The single most important thing to me is to remain sober....one day at a time. I am still mentally working on myself to get to an AA meeting as well. I understand sobriety needs community...I really want to surround myself with other sober people. I'll get there...eventually.
What are you guys doing as part of your plan?
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: Iowa
Posts: 627
I have gone through since 6/5 to see who is all with us (posting anyway). Please shout out if you want to be added to our family/list. Everyone is welcome
Donny
Daisy 4/6/2018
Strawberry 5/2/2018
Rowlands
Kgirl 4/15/2018
Eratic
Suze 4/22/2018
Blusey 4/2/2018
Lovehoops 5/1/2018
Viper
Lessgravity
Quickbrownfox
We are missing Quitnow4 and Nichole...where are you guys? Stop in and say hi
Donny
Daisy 4/6/2018
Strawberry 5/2/2018
Rowlands
Kgirl 4/15/2018
Eratic
Suze 4/22/2018
Blusey 4/2/2018
Lovehoops 5/1/2018
Viper
Lessgravity
Quickbrownfox
We are missing Quitnow4 and Nichole...where are you guys? Stop in and say hi
Member
Join Date: Apr 2018
Posts: 199
Happy Sunday Aprils!
Thanks for keeping role call for us, Kgirl ! Have a beautiful day!
Suzy, I'm sorry you feel let down by your friend who continued to drink so openly around you. If it becomes a trigger to be around her while she's drinking, well you might have to distance yourself (until you are comfortable enough to be around drinking friends) and as your sponsor says protect yourself & your sobriety at all costs! Thank you for sharing your story about the girl who relapsed in AA as well because it helped reiterate that distancing myself from my friend is more of a GIFT to myself and not meant in any way as a punishment to her. Even though I know she likely feels that way. Yet I am not responsible for her feelings. That was a hard thing for me to understand as well since I don't wish to make anyone feel bad - ever! But putting myself first is the only way I can continue building this foundation . Great job - enjoy your Sunday!!
Daisybelle - hope you get a little time to yourself today and please come on and share about your day when you have time! Glad you were able to relax some yesterday at least
Hi Dee - hope you are doing great!!
Alrighty everyone - here's to another beautiful day of sobriety!
Oh and I was just thinking this morning when I woke up how I have NEVER EVER EVER wished I drank the night before. I ALWAYS regret drinking. So, that's where the one day at a time becomes not only our mantra, but our way of life! Just work on staying sober TODAY and you'll wake up sober TOMORROW (and grateful!) and keep doing that. Lots of love to all! xx
Thanks for keeping role call for us, Kgirl ! Have a beautiful day!
Suzy, I'm sorry you feel let down by your friend who continued to drink so openly around you. If it becomes a trigger to be around her while she's drinking, well you might have to distance yourself (until you are comfortable enough to be around drinking friends) and as your sponsor says protect yourself & your sobriety at all costs! Thank you for sharing your story about the girl who relapsed in AA as well because it helped reiterate that distancing myself from my friend is more of a GIFT to myself and not meant in any way as a punishment to her. Even though I know she likely feels that way. Yet I am not responsible for her feelings. That was a hard thing for me to understand as well since I don't wish to make anyone feel bad - ever! But putting myself first is the only way I can continue building this foundation
. Great job - enjoy your Sunday!!Daisybelle - hope you get a little time to yourself today and please come on and share about your day when you have time! Glad you were able to relax some yesterday at least
Hi Dee - hope you are doing great!!
Alrighty everyone - here's to another beautiful day of sobriety!
Oh and I was just thinking this morning when I woke up how I have NEVER EVER EVER wished I drank the night before. I ALWAYS regret drinking. So, that's where the one day at a time becomes not only our mantra, but our way of life! Just work on staying sober TODAY and you'll wake up sober TOMORROW (and grateful!) and keep doing that. Lots of love to all! xx
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