xxxNICHOLExxx

Yes I have lots of things to do but I can’t focus

PalmerSage

Awesome job on 60 days, Barbs! Your puppy is soooooo cute, I want one! I'm really glad you made it through a rough patch, sometimes those feelings come out of nowhere and are SO hard to shake.

Nichole, what Bob said...what are the specific things you can do when you want to drink? What are some terrible images of drunk you that you can conjure up, to replace the false, romantic illusions that we try to hold onto?

xxxNICHOLExxx

Palmersage this might sound crazy but I don’t have really any bad images of me drunk because I always black out and don’t remember anything others then I was 4 wheeling in the woods and I was passenger in a jeep and driver hit a tree I was pretty trashed at that time scared me sober welll then last year I about went through a windshield while 4wheeling didn’t have my seat belt on in the RZR I was trashed then to after typing this I’m lucky to be alive hmmm never mind I think the urge to drink might have disappeared for now things we do when drinking sometimes welll 99.99% of the time isn’t smart I don’t even enjoy drinking anymore it’s more of a have to feeling only makes me more depressed now but I hate myself most of the time so it’s easy to reality escape then deal with it but I’m still sober on with the day only 10 more hours until I can say day 4
Hopefully everyone is doing swell and enjoying the day no green beer this weekend!!!!

canguy

It does! It does if you can get some strategies to help you manage to sit it out.
I had a rough afternoon yesterday. Working in a very stressful situation. Work stress for me is deadline and feeling that I have no control over circumstances. I'm practised at workarounds.....making it work to meet immediate needs. I got there, as I usually do. But I was having a drink at the end of it. Several. Actually, I was having a week off sober living.
I got out, its the end of the working week, there's that buzz around the streets. I don't have anything much to go home to.....the urge was very strong and the accountability level pretty low.

I had to....just get through this bit, get to tomorrow. I needed some groceries so I walked to the far store. I'll do that before buying alcohol. I did some other shopping. I spent the beer money. By 6.30 I'm home and I'm safe. Evening calm and usual.

This morning is the next day and I'm so thankful to be here and sober for another day. Sure, today will have its usual weekend challenges later this afternoon, as it usually does.

I'm coming to see sober as a practice. Like meditation or any learned skill, you have to practice and only practice brings ability. This is why these early days are hard but important. Every time you get through it, the next time isn't easier....but you have a bit more to bring to dealing with it. This makes the ppl in their really early days real heroes, they are doing it with few resources....very hard to start with little.

I'm not trying to write a lesson for anyone else....maybe more to organise my own thoughts around this.

Barbs....good to see you back here and no problems with vacation. Palmer...you've probably made 90 by now, so congratulations. Always thought of it as a real marker...

And Nichole....hang in there, you are doin good.

Have a good day all

xxxNICHOLExxx

Canguy bobdrop Emme palmersage barbs Chloerose red strawberry everyone especially Dee I wouldn’t know what to do without y’all I hate to see others struggling or feeling down I wish I could take away everything bad but unfortunately it doesn’t work like that guess it just makes us stronger !!!! I can’t give much advice about how to over come everything but I can give some positive advice hugs and open ears for listening y’all are awesome and I’m blessed for you remember rain and storms don’t last forever the sky will clear and the sun will shine to our happiness in recovery!!!!
Take care y’all

xxxNICHOLExxx

Ok I’m posting this for me cause it’s been one of those days!!!! Coming back to reflect on it.... my hopeless comes from my endless prescription medication I’ve tried and hasn’t worked I think this makes pill number 7 starting tomorrow just been 1week since I’ve started abilify and it’s make me tried and irritability kinda snappy I’ve been on antidepressant antipsychotic and now anticonvulsants seems nothing is working just worse depression I know I can reality escape for a while but I’m still bipolar but I’m so freaking tried and just want everything to stop hmmm now that I’m writing this I realize my low is very low shm maybe music time cause I wanna go easy way out but easy way usually has an hard exit I know if I drink it won’t end pretty so sober tonight no drinking no smoking time to handle emotions I hope wish me luck plz love how my mood flips within hours

xxxNICHOLExxx

Came back reread my post and guess what didn’t drink!!!!! But I did something I should’ve yesterday nothing to do with drinking or pot
Hopefully y’all are okay and sober take care

PalmerSage

Canguy, I really admire your sober time and ability to calmly navigate your daily life. From your posts, you seem like a highly independent and capable person, which is amazing. I'm glad you made it through unscathed, and lived to fight another day with bigger sober muscles.

Nichole, you are persevering through a very complex set of issues, which is great. When trying to de-romanticize drinking, maybe you can focus on how you feel after a blackout, during a hangover, etc...in other words, why do you want to stop drinking, and can you call up those reasons when faced with a craving?

Day 90 here. I had a good day yesterday (eating-wise), and woke up early this morning despite an intense desire to sleep in! Hopefully I can fit in a nap later, since I'm avoiding sugar, that is my last remaining vice!

canguy

Day 90!
Congratulations Ms Palmer Sage.
And thanks for your kind words.

Dee74

Congratulations PalmerSage

D

ChloeRose63

Happy St. Patrick's Day, everyone!

bobdrop

Good morning all. Day 77 here. Happy St. Patrick's Day! Slept in this morning. Many sore muscles after the tile work, but much more to do today.

Palmer- Congrats on day 90! Good luck with the sugar. I had way too much while working yesterday. Think I'll start on Monday.

Nichole-Keep it going! You're winning!

Hey Canguy, Emme. Hope you're having a good weekend.

Barbs-Hope you're getting some rest after your trip.

Everyone else. Have a good weekend!

Barbs

Congratulations Palmer on 90 days!!!

Nichole, great job coming back and reading your post and not drinking!

Canguy, I'm with Palmer, I love reading your posts. They have a way of helping me stay focus. Thank you!

Bob, I slept in yesterday but no time today. Got up early to get in a workout before breakfast with my mom. I hope you're done laying the tile or at least able to take a break for those muscles to recover.

xxxNICHOLExxx

Congrats on days everyone amazing like you !!!!!!
Enjoy your day / night I’m unexpectedly kid free they went to stay at in laws until tomorrow evening my husband planing a bon fire 4 wheeling party at the house tonight I plan on staying sober no reason to drink hopefully I can stay strong if not I’ll be on SR reading take care y’all

emme99

Hi everyone,
Thank you for your thoughts and prayers for my sister in law. Six weeks now before she has to go back

Congrats on 90 days PalmerSage!! Good job eating healthier too, I am encouraged by your posts

Good to see you numberthree. I hope things are going ok and you continue to post here.

Congrats on 60 days Barbs! Good to hear your vacation went well.

canguy, glad you're here and you made it through your rough afternoon. I also look forward to and enjoy reading your posts.

Bob, I hope your St. Patrick's day get together was fun and you enojyed the food & basketball. Congrats on day 77 (or maybe 78 now)

Nichole, thinking of you and I hope you're doing ok.

Hi Chloe, Red, Dee, Strawberry and everyone else

Happy Sunday~

ChloeRose63

Happy Sunday, Everyone!
I hope you all have a terrific day! I hardly think about drinking anymore. I have been focusing on my healthy eating and fitness goals. There is so much to do now that Springtime is coming. I am excited to have another sober day to enjoy it!

xxxNICHOLExxx

Another day without drinking oooo yea maybe getting the hang of this!!!! Last night was hard but I kept thinking of y’all and my kids and went to bed sober woke up feeling refresh while everyone is feeling sick and sleeping I think I might just play some really loud music and wake everyone up payback for harassing me to drink last night!!! Yep sound like a plan to me
Take care y’all congrats on days and have a good day enjoy this coming week

PalmerSage

Awesome, Nichole! Way to go!

bobdrop

Well, I had a long insightful message typed out and when I went to post, it said I wasn't logged in and I lost it. Well, I guess I kinda got it out of me even though no one saw it but me. Day 78. Back to my tiling. Good job Nichole!

xxxNICHOLExxx

Bobdrop
That’s happens to me a lot when it takes you to sign in hit the back button click copy then copy the words then sign in go to the post and hit the copy button then it should paste everything you type out before hope you understand I’m bad at giving directions but hopefully your doing okay