24Hour Recovery Connection Part 345
. Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,496
Originally Posted by BarbieKen 
I'm here to check in for my next 24. Our much loved cat, Lucky 18 years, sure could use some love, support & prayers. If you could send him a healing prayer, we'd be very grateful. 
Bobbi
Bobbi
♥
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,496
Errr.....I am just reading the books that were written overnight. 
(My night).
I love that we really talk to each other....kenton honey.....your 10 year old is the luckiest 10-year-old ever to have a mum like you. You have no idea....that he can go bravely and with confidence and not be afraid to fail....it's going to be awesome, no matter how may tricks come out right. ♥
PJ honey...devastated and angry for you.....I don't think they will change their mind though. I have the same problem here. I do not intend to live in this apartment more than another year because cats are a must. I am so sorry. ♥
(My night).I love that we really talk to each other....kenton honey.....your 10 year old is the luckiest 10-year-old ever to have a mum like you. You have no idea....that he can go bravely and with confidence and not be afraid to fail....it's going to be awesome, no matter how may tricks come out right.
♥PJ honey...devastated and angry for you.....I don't think they will change their mind though. I have the same problem here. I do not intend to live in this apartment more than another year because cats are a must. I am so sorry.
♥
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,496
Originally Posted by joandmelandhan
Good morning all. Life is now back to normal (haha normal?). Friday is my day off and I have no pressure to do or not do anything. Sounds great huh? The weird thing is that it's days like this that get me anxious more than days of deadlines and silly workloads. Why? Because I am the one who decides what I do and achieve and my track record is poor. I am the maestro at avoidance and sitting at my laptop whiling away days on end. This is a big area I need to address. A plan. Yes I need a plan for the day otherwise procrastination will take over and I'll achieve a big fat zero.
The fact is I am no longer an invalid. I have reasonably good health and energy levels, my sleep is pretty good. So JoJo what are you going to achieve today? Okay first job coffee (large of course!) and something to eat, clean my bathrooms and go for a swim. There! I've come clean here and as you know I never lie to my 24ers!
Kenton. Your post today put me right back to something I'm ashamed of today. Not your fault of course it's just one of those things. About 2 years ago my little Melly wanted to do the talent show. Hula hooping I think. I was drinking back then of course and the inconvenience of having to go to the show instead of my beloved wine coupled with my fear she would look silly drove me to ring the school and tell them she couldn't make it after all as she was going to her dads that night. Just awful. I could tell dozens of equally awful stories about my so-called parenting when I was drinking. No sodding wonder she was wetting the bed and having tantrums. Oh my poor babies I don't think I'll ever forgive myself for it all. I mean getting into a relationship with a fellow alkie after my marriage? With a woman? Then she binge drinks herself to death? And I keep drinking for another 4 year after that?
The difficulty is the only way I can keep going on this journey is to blank it all out. Keep looking forward. But what about them? What have I done to them? Is my best now good enough?
I just don't know and my fear even now of anyone in authority means I can't even think about therapy or anything like that it'd be like opening the Pandora's box of all Pandora's boxes and I'm terrified I'd drink again.
I mean they seem genuinely happy now.
I keep going gang that's all I've got. Sorry for the novel my mind went on a journey just then.....
24 PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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The fact is I am no longer an invalid. I have reasonably good health and energy levels, my sleep is pretty good. So JoJo what are you going to achieve today? Okay first job coffee (large of course!) and something to eat, clean my bathrooms and go for a swim. There! I've come clean here and as you know I never lie to my 24ers!
Kenton. Your post today put me right back to something I'm ashamed of today. Not your fault of course it's just one of those things. About 2 years ago my little Melly wanted to do the talent show. Hula hooping I think. I was drinking back then of course and the inconvenience of having to go to the show instead of my beloved wine coupled with my fear she would look silly drove me to ring the school and tell them she couldn't make it after all as she was going to her dads that night. Just awful. I could tell dozens of equally awful stories about my so-called parenting when I was drinking. No sodding wonder she was wetting the bed and having tantrums. Oh my poor babies I don't think I'll ever forgive myself for it all. I mean getting into a relationship with a fellow alkie after my marriage? With a woman? Then she binge drinks herself to death? And I keep drinking for another 4 year after that?
The difficulty is the only way I can keep going on this journey is to blank it all out. Keep looking forward. But what about them? What have I done to them? Is my best now good enough?
I just don't know and my fear even now of anyone in authority means I can't even think about therapy or anything like that it'd be like opening the Pandora's box of all Pandora's boxes and I'm terrified I'd drink again.
I mean they seem genuinely happy now.
I keep going gang that's all I've got. Sorry for the novel my mind went on a journey just then.....
24 PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Here's how I see it.....you have worked your way out of a lot of mess and pain. A lot. And the kids are doing really well now. And you are cleaning bathrooms and going swimming.
I never thought I could or would or would even want to forgive myself for all of the AWFUL things I did. But all of that changed. Time jojo. As I am sober longer I change....I have been able to lose my fear of authority to some extent. I still have to tell myself constantly that I haven't done anything wrong....lordy.....and it took me a long time to want to do any counselling.
I prefer AA personally. So as long as I go to meetings I am getting a lot of good help and perspective. I need that.
So many of us have stories that are heartbreaking....we did stuff honey, and yes we can get over it. By living our best lives, trying to be the best version of ourselves.
And I will take that advice on board today as well....
Love you.
♥
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,496
Originally Posted by soberista
I watched a documentary about prisoners on death row last night. This one guy, mid 40's, had been in prison since he was 15.
"Ronald L Sanford’s was given a 170-year sentence at the age of 15 for a horrific double murder he committed when he was 13."
When he was interviewed he said that on the night in question his mum had gone out of town with her new boyfriend and he was left at home on his own. His mother was a violent alcoholic who was violent in her parenting. He said in many respects he was trained to kill, was training for murder. He said it was an easy transition to become violent and kill the two women (83 & 87). His mother would say to him "Do what I say, not what I do". He doesnt blame his mother or her absence. His mother has always visited him in prison and now she is a recovering alcoholic. When questioned about the statement he made "He feels he was trained to kill" she said she had never heard that before.
I have many regrets about the nights i got drunk when my kids where younger. When I prioritized a bottle over them but I know I was never violent towards them . I cannot turn the clock back but I can look forward and I can be sober today. I can answer their text messages with clarity. I can be authentic. I am a good mother and with each day that I am sober I become an even better mother and person.
Namaste.
"Ronald L Sanford’s was given a 170-year sentence at the age of 15 for a horrific double murder he committed when he was 13."
When he was interviewed he said that on the night in question his mum had gone out of town with her new boyfriend and he was left at home on his own. His mother was a violent alcoholic who was violent in her parenting. He said in many respects he was trained to kill, was training for murder. He said it was an easy transition to become violent and kill the two women (83 & 87). His mother would say to him "Do what I say, not what I do". He doesnt blame his mother or her absence. His mother has always visited him in prison and now she is a recovering alcoholic. When questioned about the statement he made "He feels he was trained to kill" she said she had never heard that before.
I have many regrets about the nights i got drunk when my kids where younger. When I prioritized a bottle over them but I know I was never violent towards them . I cannot turn the clock back but I can look forward and I can be sober today. I can answer their text messages with clarity. I can be authentic. I am a good mother and with each day that I am sober I become an even better mother and person.
Namaste.
♥Very very sad story.
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Join Date: Nov 2016
Location: Ireland
Posts: 4,981
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Join Date: May 2013
Location: Coquitlam B.C.
Posts: 3,760
Good morning
Good afternoon
Good night
Dear friends
Going for surgery this morning them 10 days off work no happy but is life
Broken tooth too “went it rains it pours “.
Please another 24 more for this alcoholic soul.
Trusting Our Higher Power
Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God, as we understood Him.
—Step Three of Al-Anon
So much talk about a Higher Power, God, as we understand God. So much joy as we come to understand Him. Spirituality and spiritual growth are the foundations of change. Recovery from codependency is not a do-it-yourself task.
Is God a relentless taskmaster? A hardhearted, shaming wizard with tricks up the sleeve? Is God deaf? Uncaring? Haphazard? Unforgiving?
No.
A loving God, a caring God. That is the God of our recovery No more pain than is necessary for usefulness, healing, and cleansing. As much goodness and joy as our heart can hold, as soon as our heart is healed, open, and ready to receive God: approving, accepting, instantly forgiving.
God has planned little gifts along the way to brighten our day and sometimes big, delightful surprises perfectly timed, perfect for us.
A Master Artist, God will weave together all our joy, sadness and experience to create a portrait of our life with depth, beauty, sensitivity, color, humor, and feeling.
God as we understand Him: A loving God. The God of our recovery.
Today, I will open myself to the care of a loving God. Then, I will let God show me love
Good afternoon
Good night
Dear friends
Going for surgery this morning them 10 days off work no happy but is life
Broken tooth too “went it rains it pours “.
Please another 24 more for this alcoholic soul.
Trusting Our Higher Power
Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God, as we understood Him.
—Step Three of Al-Anon
So much talk about a Higher Power, God, as we understand God. So much joy as we come to understand Him. Spirituality and spiritual growth are the foundations of change. Recovery from codependency is not a do-it-yourself task.
Is God a relentless taskmaster? A hardhearted, shaming wizard with tricks up the sleeve? Is God deaf? Uncaring? Haphazard? Unforgiving?
No.
A loving God, a caring God. That is the God of our recovery No more pain than is necessary for usefulness, healing, and cleansing. As much goodness and joy as our heart can hold, as soon as our heart is healed, open, and ready to receive God: approving, accepting, instantly forgiving.
God has planned little gifts along the way to brighten our day and sometimes big, delightful surprises perfectly timed, perfect for us.
A Master Artist, God will weave together all our joy, sadness and experience to create a portrait of our life with depth, beauty, sensitivity, color, humor, and feeling.
God as we understand Him: A loving God. The God of our recovery.
Today, I will open myself to the care of a loving God. Then, I will let God show me love
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: Scotland
Posts: 3,837
Late today 😞 24 hours please. Too busy the last few days and not enough time to check in properly. Will remedy this over the weekend. I hope all you beautiful sober people are well and doing something today to show yourself that you recognise the enormous effort you make. As Leigh says
'it's no small thing we do'. My thing is friday night fish and chips, a movies and some time with my lovely man!
Massive Congratulations for all our milestoners today!! Gabe 💗💗
'it's no small thing we do'. My thing is friday night fish and chips, a movies and some time with my lovely man!
Massive Congratulations for all our milestoners today!! Gabe 💗💗
Member
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Texas, US
Posts: 2,478
I’m home and tucked back in bed before noon, hooray! I am beat. Had some recent trouble coping with a friend’s hostile behavior and mental status and it’s been running in the background, just gnawing and draining. I am trying to separate the person from the behavior, and also step back and take care of myself. I feel bad that I can’t be helpful to her but it’s gotten to that point. She needs help and I hope she sees that. I can’t be treated abusively anymore . We grow and change to people who don’t tolerate that, and we move into healthier relationships in sobriety. I am working on those—it takes time.
I am so happy to have choices today. Seems like things were different in the past. I tolerated a lot of abuse. I felt like I had to. It’s another world completely. And, it didn’t just go away because I stopped drinking. Some of the ‘old world ‘ remains. I met this person while sober, oddly. I am still repeating old patterns to some degree.
I really do have lovely people in my life, now. Those are the people I need to hang with, and have closer relationships with. Looking forward.
Thank you for listening. Needed to get it out so I can move forward and not risk relapse. It was a bad situation. Happy to be here with you.
Love
Red
I am so happy to have choices today. Seems like things were different in the past. I tolerated a lot of abuse. I felt like I had to. It’s another world completely. And, it didn’t just go away because I stopped drinking. Some of the ‘old world ‘ remains. I met this person while sober, oddly. I am still repeating old patterns to some degree.
I really do have lovely people in my life, now. Those are the people I need to hang with, and have closer relationships with. Looking forward.
Thank you for listening. Needed to get it out so I can move forward and not risk relapse. It was a bad situation. Happy to be here with you.
Love
Red
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,496
But how far you've come with it all dear Red....this was hard stuff. And now I hear you loving and respecting yourself and it is beautiful. Hope it is a lovely afternoon for you. ♥
♥
Keep Going
Join Date: Apr 2017
Location: England
Posts: 1,530
Originally Posted by RedBerryJuniper
....It’s another world completely.
I'm glad you're here love
Member
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Texas, US
Posts: 2,478
Thank you Suze and Weev. I was a doormat kind of person when drinking but that has no place in my sober life. I want to change that. So happy to be here. More involvement with people in recovery who treat others with kindness and respect is just the thing. I’ve been quiet and isolated. No need for that. I look forward to a sober weekend of healing and rest. It’s healing to be here with you.
I was a doormat kind of person when drinking but that has no place in my sober life. I want to change that. So happy to be here. More involvement with people in recovery who treat others with kindness and respect is just the thing. I’ve been quiet and isolated. No need for that. I look forward to a sober weekend of healing and rest. It’s healing to be here with you.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Northern Michigan
Posts: 28,801
Originally Posted by venuscat
February 2, 2018
jsm273 ~ yesterday, sorry ~ 1 week! ♥
Canadian Koala ~ 1 year & 2 months! ♥
kenton ~ 1 year & 3 months! ♥
vanaprastha ~ 2 years & 6 months!! ♥
jsm273 ~ yesterday, sorry ~ 1 week! ♥
Canadian Koala ~ 1 year & 2 months! ♥
kenton ~ 1 year & 3 months! ♥
vanaprastha ~ 2 years & 6 months!! ♥
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