Class of September 2017 Support Thread Part 4
Member
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Australia
Posts: 171
Hi Class - I thought I'd better pop in with an update as things were so terrible a few months ago.
We sold the business, finally. I didn't really ever say, it was a small hotel, 18 rooms, with a bar attached. The thing that I spent my waking life on for the last 6 years. I started it from scratch (it was a grungy filthy student accommodation hovel before we took on the lease) designed it, bought the furniture, made a website, worked out how to utilise all those booking sites, handled ten staff, taught myself about wages and book keeping and superannuation and so so much more. It was a huge job for one person. My ex was the handy one who did the maintenance but the day to day was all me. So when we sold his life didn't really change at all - he always had an outside job. I now don't have a job. But I have some money and so I don't need to worry right away. So that one major stress is gone. And not being the alcoholic owner of a bar is pretty great too.
The grief of the ex moving on is still there but it lessens. Sometimes it roars back, like yesterday it came at me with a blast and the unstoppable tears with it. The removal guys took all my stuff yesterday, and somehow moving out of the cold rental that I hated in the end was more emotional than selling the home we lived in for 10 years. I also had to give up my dog, who was my source of comfort during the loneliness of the breakup. She's going to live with my exes mum, which is the best outcome. I can send for her when I'm more set up in my new city. And she'll send me daily pics.
Also in my life, a few months ago, I discovered I am autistic. Wow, bam, so much makes sense when I read the literature. My doctor (who has an autistic son) agrees although she is a GP and not qualified to formally diagnose me. There is little point in pursuing a formal diagnosis though at my age, any kind of support pretty much stops after childhood. Girls and women can present very differently to boys and men on the spectrum - I had always thought that as someone with high empathy I couldn't be, but now I realise this just isn't true. The more I read on it, the more it fits.
Two months until I'm at 2 years sober and I wonder could life possibly be any more different? In two years everything has changed. My physical shape and size, my relationship status, my work, my financial status, and now, my neurodivergency too.
Stopping drinking was the start of it all. It was the beginning of all of this change. It has been the hardest two year period of my life I won't lie. But it feels like it is now about to get better and easier. New starts ahead.
We sold the business, finally. I didn't really ever say, it was a small hotel, 18 rooms, with a bar attached. The thing that I spent my waking life on for the last 6 years. I started it from scratch (it was a grungy filthy student accommodation hovel before we took on the lease) designed it, bought the furniture, made a website, worked out how to utilise all those booking sites, handled ten staff, taught myself about wages and book keeping and superannuation and so so much more. It was a huge job for one person. My ex was the handy one who did the maintenance but the day to day was all me. So when we sold his life didn't really change at all - he always had an outside job. I now don't have a job. But I have some money and so I don't need to worry right away. So that one major stress is gone. And not being the alcoholic owner of a bar is pretty great too.
The grief of the ex moving on is still there but it lessens. Sometimes it roars back, like yesterday it came at me with a blast and the unstoppable tears with it. The removal guys took all my stuff yesterday, and somehow moving out of the cold rental that I hated in the end was more emotional than selling the home we lived in for 10 years. I also had to give up my dog, who was my source of comfort during the loneliness of the breakup. She's going to live with my exes mum, which is the best outcome. I can send for her when I'm more set up in my new city. And she'll send me daily pics.
Also in my life, a few months ago, I discovered I am autistic. Wow, bam, so much makes sense when I read the literature. My doctor (who has an autistic son) agrees although she is a GP and not qualified to formally diagnose me. There is little point in pursuing a formal diagnosis though at my age, any kind of support pretty much stops after childhood. Girls and women can present very differently to boys and men on the spectrum - I had always thought that as someone with high empathy I couldn't be, but now I realise this just isn't true. The more I read on it, the more it fits.
Two months until I'm at 2 years sober and I wonder could life possibly be any more different? In two years everything has changed. My physical shape and size, my relationship status, my work, my financial status, and now, my neurodivergency too.
Stopping drinking was the start of it all. It was the beginning of all of this change. It has been the hardest two year period of my life I won't lie. But it feels like it is now about to get better and easier. New starts ahead.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: US
Posts: 16,899
(((Kachal))) Thank you for sharing! Sorry you've been having such a rough time....and kudos for staying sober through it all! I'm glad you can get your dog back at some point, too. Stay positive.....There's a quote I saw about things having to fall apart in order for them to fall into place....I try to keep reminding myself of that 
Member
Join Date: Jun 2017
Posts: 1,276
Hello🙂 I just wanted to let the thread know I got two years sober this week. I relapsed in year 3 the last time so I don’t want to get complacent, but I’m really pleased I got this far and I’m looking forward to what this year brings💪
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: New Hampshire
Posts: 58
Just popping in to say hi everyone. I hit two years sober on the 9th. I can't say that when I started all this I was expecting to make it this far. But, now, at this point, I cannot believe what a difference my sobriety has made in my life. Usually once or twice a week I just find myself thinking how much easier everything is. How smoothly everything is falling into place. Had I continued on my previous path I would surely be in a much worse spot. In a month or so I'll only have a year of license suspension left and can start looking forward to that.
Congrats to everyone. We did this together.
Congrats to everyone. We did this together.
Congrats Stronger, Kachal and Ramius! 
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Posts: 48
Anyone still here?
Aye up (as we say round here) 👋
Is anyone still around - how are you doing?
I’m just popping my head in to celebrate 3 full years of sobriety. THREE YEARS!!!
I would never ever have thought, on that day three years ago, that it really was finally going to be my moment of success.
Without musing on the fact for too long, I will simply say that life without alcohol is a far better life, no matter the trials or tribulations. Surfing on a clear steady wave is far preferable to the tsunami that was about to consume me.
Thank you you all for your support in those first few days, weeks, months...it was invaluable.
Is anyone still around - how are you doing?
I’m just popping my head in to celebrate 3 full years of sobriety. THREE YEARS!!!
I would never ever have thought, on that day three years ago, that it really was finally going to be my moment of success.
Without musing on the fact for too long, I will simply say that life without alcohol is a far better life, no matter the trials or tribulations. Surfing on a clear steady wave is far preferable to the tsunami that was about to consume me.
Thank you you all for your support in those first few days, weeks, months...it was invaluable.
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