One Year and Under Club Part 60
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
One Year and Under Club Part 60
thank you Dee!!Living and Loving Life at Last
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: gods own country
Posts: 12,168
Thanks for the new thread Dee.
And thank you Badger for your kind words. This thread is special to me, and I do all I can to support those who pass through the doors and pull up a seat here.
As to your hubby issue. Well he might only have one beer, but I'm sure he likes nice beer. My hubby is a Normie, who absolutely fell in love with the craft beers he came across when we lived in the states. And he would have loved the chance to check out a brewery, so a second hand invite would have been enough for him. Perhaps your hubby is the same? As to your feelings about him going I suspect there is a little envy, some feeling of hurt and maybe a little betrayal. I mean, where is the feckless so-and-so's sense of solidarity!
I'm sure he meant no harm by wanting to go, and, as I am no longer able to be a drinking partner to my hubby any more, I hope I wouldn't begrudge him the experience. ( after a short huff of course, to get it out of my system!)
Well done on decorating without the 'help' ! I too found it difficult the first year or two. With me it was eggnog. Something Christmassy to 'get me in the Christmas spirit' . Yesterday I danced with the dog and sang carols and silly songs as I twirled tinsel! Fortunately there were no other witnesses and I promised Molly a big bone if she didn't tell!
And thank you Badger for your kind words. This thread is special to me, and I do all I can to support those who pass through the doors and pull up a seat here.
As to your hubby issue. Well he might only have one beer, but I'm sure he likes nice beer. My hubby is a Normie, who absolutely fell in love with the craft beers he came across when we lived in the states. And he would have loved the chance to check out a brewery, so a second hand invite would have been enough for him. Perhaps your hubby is the same? As to your feelings about him going I suspect there is a little envy, some feeling of hurt and maybe a little betrayal. I mean, where is the feckless so-and-so's sense of solidarity!
I'm sure he meant no harm by wanting to go, and, as I am no longer able to be a drinking partner to my hubby any more, I hope I wouldn't begrudge him the experience. ( after a short huff of course, to get it out of my system!)
Well done on decorating without the 'help' ! I too found it difficult the first year or two. With me it was eggnog. Something Christmassy to 'get me in the Christmas spirit' . Yesterday I danced with the dog and sang carols and silly songs as I twirled tinsel! Fortunately there were no other witnesses and I promised Molly a big bone if she didn't tell!
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Join Date: Jun 2017
Posts: 1,276
Hello Unders. I don’t think I’ve ever tried eggnog. Maybe I should give it a go this year. Btw, how do you all deal with it when others appear to move on for whatever reason? Obviously, you can’t help wondering how they’re doing, but I don’t want to be wondering out loud too much as it seems a little crass. Enjoy your day everyone.
Quit 4/17/15
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Pa
Posts: 15,176
Stronger, the longer you are here on SR, the more you will see folks come and go. Some people get a number of months of sobriety and leave SR behind. Some have a slip and drop off the SR radar for a bit but usually return later on. I have seen a few come back under another name. I used to find it difficult early on when people I had known for months suddenly dropped off SR.
I think of SR as a train going on a long journey. People are jumping on and off all the time. Not everyone is headed to the end of the line.
I think of SR as a train going on a long journey. People are jumping on and off all the time. Not everyone is headed to the end of the line.
Living and Loving Life at Last
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: gods own country
Posts: 12,168
Yeah, and others leave to catch another train! I've been PMd in the past by people who have or were leaving. I am also FB friends with other, so know they carry on with their sober lives.
I know when I first came here I wasn't ready to face sobriety as a permanency, with the obvious result of sliding into booze again. It took me more than six months and several visits to actually be in the right headspace and have my stars aligned. ( let's face it something, in the universe seems to click the day we are ready to begin our next adventure!)
Thinking too much about how others are doing can be counter productive. If people you have grown to like/ admire slip, your own resolve can weaken. If others seem to be coping better with their sobriety, you can feel like perhaps you aren't meant to have that life.
We need to remember that we all come here in different ways, we all live different lives, we are all different people. What matters is how we, the individual find a way to -initially get through ODAAT, then finally -learn to live a sober life.
I know when I first came here I wasn't ready to face sobriety as a permanency, with the obvious result of sliding into booze again. It took me more than six months and several visits to actually be in the right headspace and have my stars aligned. ( let's face it something, in the universe seems to click the day we are ready to begin our next adventure!)
Thinking too much about how others are doing can be counter productive. If people you have grown to like/ admire slip, your own resolve can weaken. If others seem to be coping better with their sobriety, you can feel like perhaps you aren't meant to have that life.
We need to remember that we all come here in different ways, we all live different lives, we are all different people. What matters is how we, the individual find a way to -initially get through ODAAT, then finally -learn to live a sober life.
O-n K-a-r A-r-r-e-s-t
Join Date: May 2016
Location: US
Posts: 600
I think eggnog may be an acquired taste stronger
tools I can what you are saying... it is hard when someone you like or really relate to just disappears.... you just always hope they are ok or will be back soon.
tools I can what you are saying... it is hard when someone you like or really relate to just disappears.... you just always hope they are ok or will be back soon.
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Join Date: Nov 2016
Location: Anywhere USA
Posts: 2,099
thank you for that post Stronger, and everyone's replies regarding people popping in and out of SR. I have a tendency to get mad at myself when I see someone from one of my earlier attempts have been successful and now have a gazillion days or years of being sober, and all I could think of is how I could have those numbers if I were stronger!! dang it!
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Living and Loving Life at Last
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: gods own country
Posts: 12,168
Ah , Badger. If I had been willing to confront my addiction when I truly first knew I had a problem, I would have had a decade on top of what I have. No point in what ifs. What matters is you are here now and you have this. Look at who you are now, think about who you want to be going forward. Learn from who you were.
Living and Loving Life at Last
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: gods own country
Posts: 12,168
Yeah, without all the experience I had as an active addict, I would have less support to pass forward here!
Thanks Purps, that's my Molly, she normally wears a different Christmas outfit every year for her Avi, but I cheated this year and posted her first picture!
Thanks Purps, that's my Molly, she normally wears a different Christmas outfit every year for her Avi, but I cheated this year and posted her first picture!
O-n K-a-r A-r-r-e-s-t
Join Date: May 2016
Location: US
Posts: 600
I hate to think of all the wasted time and wasted money..... or who I could be if I hadn't. I could be so much farther on up the road. I'm early in sobriety and even though those thoughts are there I cannot let myself sit with them very long or I get in a bad place. Especially if I start comparing. Comparing got me drinking a lot in the first place. So neither are good - have to stay away from that. Concentration on any and all baby steps.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2017
Posts: 426
Coming up to the end of 5th month
I am so dying for a drink ...... it's like my entire body is in knots gagging for drink
I have had a torrid time with Bitcoin. I thought I could buy low and sell high to improve on the long-term trend. Ended up buying high and selling low. I have pumped in more £1000,s to try to maintain my coin holding - but I'm worse off. I think when I cash out I will have lost hundred of thousands in cash and opportuninty profits. I have been rolling about on the bed a lot screaming.
BRAIN DAMAGE
I dank for decades and decided to quit. There was brain damage. I lost about 15 points off my raw IQ + some of 'me' + reduced creativity. It was worth it though to stop drinking.
I started drinking again after a year or so, and then drank for 7 years. I quit and had some more brain damage (thinking one thing and typing another etc.)
I think I lasted 15 months and drank again for a week or so, quit (no obvious brain damage), then had one massive binge, and did this quit.
The thing is, that last drinking binge (just a matter of hours) did enormous brain damage. I developed serious anxiety problems (can't breath sometimes), befuddled decision making, and other horrible stuff.
My point of saying all this is -starting drinking again (even one session over hours) is Russian roulette, regarding brain damage. You might be OK, or you might end up like me (after just one binge) - a feeble-minded wreck making idiotic decisions.
I'm going to have to re-lean how to make strategic decisions instead of panicking and throwing myself about like a toddler (I'm in my 60s)
I am so dying for a drink ...... it's like my entire body is in knots gagging for drink
I have had a torrid time with Bitcoin. I thought I could buy low and sell high to improve on the long-term trend. Ended up buying high and selling low. I have pumped in more £1000,s to try to maintain my coin holding - but I'm worse off. I think when I cash out I will have lost hundred of thousands in cash and opportuninty profits. I have been rolling about on the bed a lot screaming.
BRAIN DAMAGE
I dank for decades and decided to quit. There was brain damage. I lost about 15 points off my raw IQ + some of 'me' + reduced creativity. It was worth it though to stop drinking.
I started drinking again after a year or so, and then drank for 7 years. I quit and had some more brain damage (thinking one thing and typing another etc.)
I think I lasted 15 months and drank again for a week or so, quit (no obvious brain damage), then had one massive binge, and did this quit.
The thing is, that last drinking binge (just a matter of hours) did enormous brain damage. I developed serious anxiety problems (can't breath sometimes), befuddled decision making, and other horrible stuff.
My point of saying all this is -starting drinking again (even one session over hours) is Russian roulette, regarding brain damage. You might be OK, or you might end up like me (after just one binge) - a feeble-minded wreck making idiotic decisions.
I'm going to have to re-lean how to make strategic decisions instead of panicking and throwing myself about like a toddler (I'm in my 60s)
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