Class of October 2017 Support Thread pt. 4
Member
Join Date: Apr 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 504
Just wanted to check in before I call it a night. It was a lazy day today and not sure why I felt so lackadaisical. The manic panic that I felt many times during this year (and years prior) has been quietly tolerable. I find myself not dwelling on a bad situation but easing my way though the day and not living in hyper fear. I've come to realize that the "take it one day at a time" is the way to go for me. I'm not looking into the future trying to figure out what horrible thing is going to happen. I hope this feeling sticks. I'm getting a whole different outlook on this drinking thing this time around. I see the agony and pain and panic and anxiety if I sip one sip. And then I see the opposite if I don't take that sip. I wake in the morning thanking myself for not putting me through the depths of hell with the measly bottle of wine. Now if I can just stop eating Sour Patch Kids candies....
Member
Join Date: Nov 2016
Location: Anywhere USA
Posts: 2,099
Good Morning LuLu! Sour Patch huh? popcorn is my demon, I cant have it in the house. Yes a little is a healthy snack, however, a giant bowl with a stick of butter melted over it with salt,,, not so much
Badge
Badge
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Northeast, US
Posts: 2,073
Hi October Folks!!! 
I’m on the beach. It’s empty. Perfect temps. Low 80’s. Hot sun. Nice breeze. Had a nice swim. This is great!! A million dollar sunset every night. Everything’s great with my sister and me. Really this trip came off without a hitch. Cuba flight on Saturday.
Plus, I’m SOBER as a judge. I’ve got some time under my belt. I can really feel my presence and the sand and ocean and air, instead of being numb. My sister drinks like one beer a day from a microbrewery. Doesn’t bother me a bit. I think she’s doing well financially because she’s not on me for any money at all to share the condo. I’ll ask her how much the taxes are on the rental and hand her that. I’m just paying my own food and expenses.
Feeling awesome. I was dying in CT and didn’t even know it. All of my autoimmune symtoms are way better. Also I’m going on 2 weeks with the Singulair and I think it’s working well. Also the warmth and Vit D.
Viper
I’m on the beach. It’s empty. Perfect temps. Low 80’s. Hot sun. Nice breeze. Had a nice swim. This is great!! A million dollar sunset every night. Everything’s great with my sister and me. Really this trip came off without a hitch. Cuba flight on Saturday.
Plus, I’m SOBER as a judge. I’ve got some time under my belt. I can really feel my presence and the sand and ocean and air, instead of being numb. My sister drinks like one beer a day from a microbrewery. Doesn’t bother me a bit. I think she’s doing well financially because she’s not on me for any money at all to share the condo. I’ll ask her how much the taxes are on the rental and hand her that. I’m just paying my own food and expenses.
Feeling awesome. I was dying in CT and didn’t even know it. All of my autoimmune symtoms are way better. Also I’m going on 2 weeks with the Singulair and I think it’s working well. Also the warmth and Vit D.
Viper
Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: United Kingdom
Posts: 149
Viper.. that sounds amazing. I love the ocean.
Just checking in at day 36. So glad I’ve made it this far and feeling great.
Really glad it’s Monday. I find my urges are very low during the week but can hit me like a tonne of bricks at the weekend. Thanks to anyone who lifted my mood at the weekend. So glad I didn’t drink and just dealt with my emotions and sat through them. It was tough but I’ve not felt as good on a Monday in years.
Even though you are all strangers the help and knowledge you all have given me has definitely been instrumental in me staying sober. Hope everybody has a good week and hope a few who haven’t posted in a while are doing ok.
Just checking in at day 36. So glad I’ve made it this far and feeling great.
Really glad it’s Monday. I find my urges are very low during the week but can hit me like a tonne of bricks at the weekend. Thanks to anyone who lifted my mood at the weekend. So glad I didn’t drink and just dealt with my emotions and sat through them. It was tough but I’ve not felt as good on a Monday in years.
Even though you are all strangers the help and knowledge you all have given me has definitely been instrumental in me staying sober. Hope everybody has a good week and hope a few who haven’t posted in a while are doing ok.
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Join Date: Nov 2016
Location: Anywhere USA
Posts: 2,099
Viper I do not think you could have for a better vacation at a better time, sounds like what you needed physically and mentally. I am really anxious to hear about Cuba, I cannot see myself ever going there, so will enjoy and discover through your eyes.
Double D- congrats on 36 days! I understand the AV striking on the weekends, I am not tempted to buy anymore, but gosh I wish I would quit thinking about drinking, its like an ear worm, except I am talking to myself all the time about how much better off I am sober, how my paranoia and anxieties have diminished, my heart isn't jumping all over the place,,,, my brain won't shut up about it.
Christmas decorating is done, we have lights up in the house, the tree is up with not one ornament on it with the exception of the built in lights, husband says it looks fine, so I am going with it. I have some inflatables in the front yard, so merry Christmas in the Badgerden!
Badge
Double D- congrats on 36 days! I understand the AV striking on the weekends, I am not tempted to buy anymore, but gosh I wish I would quit thinking about drinking, its like an ear worm, except I am talking to myself all the time about how much better off I am sober, how my paranoia and anxieties have diminished, my heart isn't jumping all over the place,,,, my brain won't shut up about it.
Christmas decorating is done, we have lights up in the house, the tree is up with not one ornament on it with the exception of the built in lights, husband says it looks fine, so I am going with it. I have some inflatables in the front yard, so merry Christmas in the Badgerden!
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Member
Join Date: Nov 2016
Location: Anywhere USA
Posts: 2,099
Hey October family!! CHECK IN PLEASE!
Will the following please check in let me/us know your still with us!
Your posts are needed!
Kit
Wax
Bob4x4
Bobdrop
bright
Soul
CC
ChloeRose
Rubaduck
Ready45
I know I have missed a bunch, so please check in and yell at me for being such a insensitive, forgetful blonde.
Complacency is our enemy, the AV has lots of patients and makes us believe that we have control and do not need to be vigilant or wary of that "one" drink. I know from experience that that is the worst mistake I ever allowed myself, addiction wise, I was feeling great, the "novelty" of being sober was over, and before I knew it, I was bingeing and hiding bottles again. I contribute a lot of that due to the fact that I slowly stopped coming here, stopped reading, stopped posting because I felt I had nothing to contribute, because I was "doing fine". I am terrified of that happening again so am doing things differently this time, and if "badgering" all of you into posting or checking in,, well so be it.
Badge
Your posts are needed!
Kit
Wax
Bob4x4
Bobdrop
bright
Soul
CC
ChloeRose
Rubaduck
Ready45
I know I have missed a bunch, so please check in and yell at me for being such a insensitive, forgetful blonde.
Complacency is our enemy, the AV has lots of patients and makes us believe that we have control and do not need to be vigilant or wary of that "one" drink. I know from experience that that is the worst mistake I ever allowed myself, addiction wise, I was feeling great, the "novelty" of being sober was over, and before I knew it, I was bingeing and hiding bottles again. I contribute a lot of that due to the fact that I slowly stopped coming here, stopped reading, stopped posting because I felt I had nothing to contribute, because I was "doing fine". I am terrified of that happening again so am doing things differently this time, and if "badgering" all of you into posting or checking in,, well so be it.
Badge
Member
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: US South
Posts: 45
Hi everyone, Been a few days so I thought I’d try and add to the thread. Looks like the thread has slowed down a little and I certainly hope that’s due to busyness, etc. Everything’s ok with me, even went out to dinner with a friend and had no urge to drink – which has always been the case for as long as I can remember. Felt really good to drive home through the city on a Saturday night completely sober. Of course my driving days are most likely numbered but right now I am focusing on my sobriety and doing the next right thing. The legal problems from the DWI are what they are and I am trying to not get overwhelmed by the what-ifs, etc. Acceptance - maybe?
DoubleDee – way to go on 36! Even though Mondays are egh going back to work – it’s amazing how much less painful they are without the hangover.
Viper- Sounds like a great trip. Can’t wait to hear about Cuba.
Badge -now I’m craving popcorn this evening. With lots and lots of butter. I agree with DoubleDee - Your positivity is infectious, keep it coming.
Bimini – Yes! I wasn’t even consciously aware of how irritated, angry, etc. I became because people did not do things the way I think they should. Having now educated myself more on alcoholics’ character defects - I am a textbook case. I am working hard to just eliminate my expectations of others (except myself).
Soul – excellent comments on singledom and aloneness. You are I are very similar on this front (and many more as you know). I too haven’t dated in quite some time and I too have acted like I was ok with it when really I have missed the companionship, etc. I know that the state I’ve been in the past few years would have prohibited any real relationship. So I’m right there with you on committing to some work on myself, and honestly getting to know the sober me. She’s been away for quite a while!
I love this!
Lulu - sounds like you are doing well with one day at a time! Finding yourself not dwelling is a major accomplishment - i know how hard it is to not let yourself go down that hole. Eat the sour patch kids!
Just a quick question - for ya’ll – do any of you suffer from tinnitus? I was diagnosed with it a little over a year ago and for the first few months I was driven to utter despair with it (and used it as an excuse to drink). Over time I slowly habituated to it for the most part although it does flare up with stress. I’ve read that alcohol abuse can be an attributing factor to it, and was just wondering if anyone else here has it and if so – any tips or insight? It hasn’t changed at all since I’ve quit (44 days). I run a fan at my desk and beside my bed – background noise is a tremendous help.
Wishing you all a good week – sober, productive and strong!!
XOXO,
Ready
DoubleDee – way to go on 36! Even though Mondays are egh going back to work – it’s amazing how much less painful they are without the hangover.
Viper- Sounds like a great trip. Can’t wait to hear about Cuba.
Badge -now I’m craving popcorn this evening. With lots and lots of butter. I agree with DoubleDee - Your positivity is infectious, keep it coming.
Bimini –
Why doesn't everyone do things the way I think they should?
Soul – excellent comments on singledom and aloneness. You are I are very similar on this front (and many more as you know). I too haven’t dated in quite some time and I too have acted like I was ok with it when really I have missed the companionship, etc. I know that the state I’ve been in the past few years would have prohibited any real relationship. So I’m right there with you on committing to some work on myself, and honestly getting to know the sober me. She’s been away for quite a while!
I am not resigning my sober self to that life of aloneness. I hope giving myself such a big chance of focusing on me that after next year I might be stronger in this category and who knows what may happen.
Lulu - sounds like you are doing well with one day at a time! Finding yourself not dwelling is a major accomplishment - i know how hard it is to not let yourself go down that hole. Eat the sour patch kids!
Just a quick question - for ya’ll – do any of you suffer from tinnitus? I was diagnosed with it a little over a year ago and for the first few months I was driven to utter despair with it (and used it as an excuse to drink). Over time I slowly habituated to it for the most part although it does flare up with stress. I’ve read that alcohol abuse can be an attributing factor to it, and was just wondering if anyone else here has it and if so – any tips or insight? It hasn’t changed at all since I’ve quit (44 days). I run a fan at my desk and beside my bed – background noise is a tremendous help.
Wishing you all a good week – sober, productive and strong!!
XOXO,
Ready
O-n K-a-r A-r-r-e-s-t
Join Date: May 2016
Location: US
Posts: 600
Just a quick question - for ya’ll – do any of you suffer from tinnitus?
My left ear started ringing ~7-8 yrs ago when I had a bad case of sinus infection that required around a month of antibiotics. I had the ringing in ear and dizziness. The dizziness went away but the tinnitus drives me insane half the time. And yes I drank too to not have to listen to it. I guess being drunk you lose or more likely don't care about the ringing. Nothing has helped - it's actually pretty bad right now. That along with terrible hot flashes from menopause had me miserable when drinking and when not (hope this isnt TMI). I am so hoping that the longer I am sober, maybe both will subside at least a little (I'm afraid to hope for more than that). And ready I hope our sober selves are people we will get used to and feel so at peace with - that's what I'm going for - just to feel at peace with myself finally.
badger - <raises my hand> yes I am still here. I don't know whether people are doing ok and are away and busy or away back down the rabbit hole.... I surely hope not. It has been kinda quiet here lately. Hope that there are people around on the board during Christmas week. I know there will be some point when I feel the loneliness of not having my own family and being here by myself. So again I raise my hand.... I'm sure to be popping in and out a lot that week and day. I also agree with you about complacency. I was in here way before my DUI and would slack off on coming in and being vigilant and would go back to a binge. I wish I could have been as serious back then and kept myself from a lot of heartache. So just saying I miss everyone in here posting all the time too.
Hope everyone on here and away is doing ok and having a peaceful evening.... sober.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: UK
Posts: 108
Answering the call
Hi to all my Sober October Family
I mentioned I’m away from home a lot at the moment working on a project. The internet access is patchy and I’m accessing the site on a phone which makes for snail pace typing.
I had to answer Badges shout out tho and I agree wholeheartedly with her point about complacency.
I reached 6 weeks sober on Saturday so looking forward to this weekend where 2 great milestones will be passed, 7 weeks, then 50 days.
On a certain level this is becoming my new normal. That said, there isn’t a half a day passes without me thinking ruefully as though I’ve lost a friend. I just have to seize those moments and throttle the thought that I’ve “lost” anything and then remind myself of what I’ve gained.
Selfies.....
6 weeks ago after I was sober a few days I started taking regular selfies, just head shots of myself. I have about 20 now all in a single folder on my phone.
I’m 50, so my youthful looks have long since deserted me and I never did have much cause to suffer vanity but..... the change in my face is significant. Puffiness gone, dry flaky skin now mostly normal, redness around nose and mouth completely gone, grey tired look, also gone, eyes brighter, ...Victor happier! This is a great physiological record of my progress and as such some really good encouragement to keep going.
Try it for yourselves.
I too have tinnitus.
I never knew that heavy drinking was an aggravating factor tho.
Maybe mine isn’t so bad cos I’ve mostly learned to ignore it. It can be very annoying by times and often once I pay attention to it, it seems to get much worse so I try to just tune it out.
Driving late at night through the city is one of my new re-discovered pleasures in life and oh... did I mention the tonic water? I’m drinking it a lot and it’s acting like a great replacement for beer.
That it from me really. That’s all my little tips and tales.
Glad to be part of you all.
Victor
I mentioned I’m away from home a lot at the moment working on a project. The internet access is patchy and I’m accessing the site on a phone which makes for snail pace typing.
I had to answer Badges shout out tho and I agree wholeheartedly with her point about complacency.
I reached 6 weeks sober on Saturday so looking forward to this weekend where 2 great milestones will be passed, 7 weeks, then 50 days.
On a certain level this is becoming my new normal. That said, there isn’t a half a day passes without me thinking ruefully as though I’ve lost a friend. I just have to seize those moments and throttle the thought that I’ve “lost” anything and then remind myself of what I’ve gained.
Selfies.....
6 weeks ago after I was sober a few days I started taking regular selfies, just head shots of myself. I have about 20 now all in a single folder on my phone.
I’m 50, so my youthful looks have long since deserted me and I never did have much cause to suffer vanity but..... the change in my face is significant. Puffiness gone, dry flaky skin now mostly normal, redness around nose and mouth completely gone, grey tired look, also gone, eyes brighter, ...Victor happier! This is a great physiological record of my progress and as such some really good encouragement to keep going.
Try it for yourselves.
I too have tinnitus.
I never knew that heavy drinking was an aggravating factor tho.
Maybe mine isn’t so bad cos I’ve mostly learned to ignore it. It can be very annoying by times and often once I pay attention to it, it seems to get much worse so I try to just tune it out.
Driving late at night through the city is one of my new re-discovered pleasures in life and oh... did I mention the tonic water? I’m drinking it a lot and it’s acting like a great replacement for beer.
That it from me really. That’s all my little tips and tales.
Glad to be part of you all.
Victor
Member
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: US South
Posts: 45
Thanks for the roll call Badge! I totally see what you are saying about complacency! Even if I don't post - SR is part of my day and reading it is a reminder several times a day of what I am dealing with - a life-threatening addiction. I love to start the day with the daily readings (both AA and NA threads).
Wow Soul - can't believe we haven't discussed the tinnitus before? Mine just came out of the blue or at least amped up to where i was losing my mind. Crying and begging for the universe to make it stop. Went to my GP and he referred me to an audiologist who did all the hearing tests and they showed I have some significant hearing loss. Yeah i'm 46 - pretty sure a result of lots of loud music and live shows in my younger days. There's a technique on the internet that has you cover your ears and thump the back of your head. For me - it works but only for a few minutes. Doctor told me more or less to learn to live with it or get fitted with a hearing device - that's not really a hearing aid but masks the tinnitus with another sound. Anyways, I am hoping that eliminating alcohol will maybe help this subside - but that would just be a bonus.
Hi Victor - those are huge milestones! I know those selfies are concrete proof of what alcohol does and isn't it amazing in that amount of time how many physical side effects to your appearance can go away? Good luck on your work project. Thanks for the tips and tales!
Wow Soul - can't believe we haven't discussed the tinnitus before? Mine just came out of the blue or at least amped up to where i was losing my mind. Crying and begging for the universe to make it stop. Went to my GP and he referred me to an audiologist who did all the hearing tests and they showed I have some significant hearing loss. Yeah i'm 46 - pretty sure a result of lots of loud music and live shows in my younger days. There's a technique on the internet that has you cover your ears and thump the back of your head. For me - it works but only for a few minutes. Doctor told me more or less to learn to live with it or get fitted with a hearing device - that's not really a hearing aid but masks the tinnitus with another sound. Anyways, I am hoping that eliminating alcohol will maybe help this subside - but that would just be a bonus.
Hi Victor - those are huge milestones! I know those selfies are concrete proof of what alcohol does and isn't it amazing in that amount of time how many physical side effects to your appearance can go away? Good luck on your work project. Thanks for the tips and tales!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 504
Good to see people showing up! Thinking about the others and hoping to see them soon.
ready - I also have tinnitus and it's so annoying. It just became more annoying because I am thinking about it now, lol. I turn my air purifier on at night and it helps....also use white noise "fan" online.
Happy belated 6 weeks SoberVictor and Happy day 36 Doubledee!
Viper - enjoy your time there in Florida and Cuba....I hear Cuba is beautiful.
Soul - Not sure if there is TMI here on SR
Badge - luv that you are all festive x-mas decorated including inflatables.
:
Good night all. Things are pretty low-key and not much to report...
ready - I also have tinnitus and it's so annoying. It just became more annoying because I am thinking about it now, lol. I turn my air purifier on at night and it helps....also use white noise "fan" online.
Happy belated 6 weeks SoberVictor and Happy day 36 Doubledee!
Viper - enjoy your time there in Florida and Cuba....I hear Cuba is beautiful.
Soul - Not sure if there is TMI here on SR
Badge - luv that you are all festive x-mas decorated including inflatables.
:Good night all. Things are pretty low-key and not much to report...
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