joandmelandhan

Camery I think one day you'll look back and be very happy you got out of there sweetheart! What an awful situation! It's really tough to find another way of coping when our go-to has been alcohol for sooooo long. Great thing is you're back where you need to be. Where I need to be too. Right here with a great group of people for support. What struck me about your post was when you described the anxiety and other awful feelings which come straight back. No break from alcohol would ever prevent that for me the line is crossed. I know I've got a nasty withdrawal waiting for me if I ever go back. It serves to keep me sober quite often (Friday nights especially).
Ooooohhhhh Arp! Ditching the sugar? I'm impressed! It's definitely a bit of an issue for me too. Maybe a substitute addiction even. Ugh we're more messed up than just alcohol aren't we? Let us know how it goes. I'm not ready to give my beloved cake away just yet. Although I remember years ago having a bit of CBT and learning that if we do what our mood tells us that we end up doing very little (as a depressed person) and should do more of what we should do whether we feel like it or not. Like Nike say "Just do it" !
On that note I really must do some chores today. I'm getting lazy again and it gets me down. So have a great sober weekend lovelies!

Camery03

Thanks for all of your kind words my lovely Mayflies! Such a good feeling to have first thing in the morning-- I missed all that.

You are too funny ARP--- no, I don't drive a Toyota. Camery was my golden retrievers name that passed away last year. She was the ultimate dog. So much like a person. Unlike, my new pup. We nick named her "Sass", cuz that about sums her up. Different breeds definitely breed different personalities, and she has her own lil spunk.
Hope you are all doing well on this Saturday morning. We are in the same weather pattern as Arp..... woke up to 35 degrees, but I am not complainin'.

Off to a craft/harvest fest thing today. Hope that helps to take my mind off everything else going on in my messed up life. LOL.

I will check in on ya'll later my friends!

XOXO-
Camery

ben83

Well it's Saturday and I'm on the Becks blue again 0.05%. I know it's frowned upon but that's the way it is. It's either this or go to bed and I need some kind of life.

Elke516

Hey, good stuff Arp, I'm clearing the cupboards too.
That's a big drop in temperature you have there.

Ben, that would be dangerous ground for me, good luck to you.

How are the Mayfly ladies today?

joandmelandhan

Ben please be careful. Not a nag honest but I couldn't do that. But if it's working for now.......

joandmelandhan

You know that feeling when you've just bought a car then your laptop and tumble dryer break down? I do!
Talk about first world problems!
Oh well in the words of the kids:
#justmyluck
#whocaresimsober
#loveyouguys

ben83

I know but at the moment it's keeping me sane (ish) VERY short tempered last few days just had to get out the house for an hour. Bringing back Chinese takeaway though so should all be good. Day 14 tomorrow !

ben83

Jo sounds stupid but when was tge last time you checked the filter in your tumble dryer. I get asked to look at "broken " tumble dryers at work and most of tge time it's a build up of fluff

joandmelandhan

Ooh Ben you're an expert! It's a condenser dryer and I think the bit that collects the water is leaking and shorting the electric. For now we've fiddled with it and its hanging on so we'll see......
I usually get panicky and just replace things so I'm trusting my other half and letting him give it a go.
Enjoy your Chinese!

Camery03

UGH as much as a cold beer sounds really good right now ( even tho that was never my drink of choice) I don't think I could.
Beautiful day here-- cool temps and all. The craft fair turned out to be a block party of sorts, so crafts food and lots of beer. Bought a few Halloween decorations, a scarf and hat, and picked up Ali from the doggy spa and home now to enjoy some sun before it gets dark, and my crock pot dinner.
Sounds lame for a Saturday, but I am content.

Hope you all had a good day!!!!

joandmelandhan

Not lame at all Camery. I'd say it was a brilliant way to end the day. Safe and sound back at home you should be proud xxx

Dee74

I hope you can get it all sorted Jo.
Sounds like a good Saturday to me Camery

I reckon you're setting up a false premise Ben where your only two choices are doing nothing or drinking.

You've even associated life with drinking.

I know it's NA....but trust me the line between getting a NA beer and having a bad day and getting a real beer is very faint.

Its still the same behavior yeah - looking to a substance to fix us?

There's a million things you and the missus can do on the weekend to make life exciting and fun - and none of them need involve any kind of substance.

ben83

You are right dee. I think I just realised that when I just woke up at 6:30 And my first thought was to go and get a alcohol free beer. I will not drink alcohol free beer anymore.

Thanks guys. Can I still say day 14 or does this mean I'm on day 1 ?

Dee74

Opinions will vary but I reckon you can count day 14. Intents the thing and your intent was good, Ben.

D

ben83

joandmelandhan

Ben I'm relieved you've made that decision. Let's not dwell and be happy about your 14 days!!!!! That's great!
Girls day out in Leeds today. My eldest has a netball match there so we're going to watch that then have a nice lumch out. Shopping was planned too but I need to watch the pennies so maybe not today....
Have a lovely sober Sunday everyone!

Simplicity4114

I can't tell you how many times in the past week I've sat at this keyboard to post and then the words fail me. I guess first let me say, my son is physically alive and in jail. Thankfully his "girlfriend" found him in time. He would be dead right now if she hadn't. I am grateful she was there and yet fearful of when the next call will come to tell me he has finally succeeded. In many ways I feel as if he is actually already gone. I don't recognize him anymore and haven't for quite some time now. Every once in a while I will see a glimmer of the son I raised but those moments are fleeting and few and far between. These are dark days here in the Simples household.
I'm trying very hard to not numb out my feelings. I've been calling it anxiety but it is straight up fear. It's been straight up fear for many months now although the fears have changed from things like-him losing his family and job to will he make it through this alive or will I need to bury another child.
I feel a tremendous sense of guilt as I know I missed many signs of his early drug use due to my own developing addiction to alcohol at that time.
I feel broken. Like there is something deep within me that is broken. Everyday this week I put on my scrubs, went to work and plastered a frozen smile on my face; all the while I felt like I was dying inside.
I'm going to try to schedule a counseling appointment. Don't think there are any quick fixes here.
Thank you all for you thoughts.....even the godless ones.

Dee74

I'm a believer in prayer so I'll pray for your son, Sim. May he turn his life around like some many have

D

Arpeggioh

Count on around 100 prayers today from First Congregational Church members, and of course you know you have only the best thoughts and hopes and prayers from your Mayfly friends.

joandmelandhan

Oh Sim I just don't know what to say. The utter tragedy of the whole situation is heartbreaking. You are in my thoughts every day. Lots of love sweetheart ♥♥♥