kenton

Morning/evening guys!

Thanks Pooky! You're right. As long as I stick up for my daughter, I can rest easy that I'm making the right decisions. The old me was a real people -pleaser and I think the old me would have struggled with telling my friend I could no longer drive her daughter to school. I think I'm finally learning to please the right people. And whilst I like to be kind and do favours for people because that makes me feel good, if someone crosses a line I'm learning it's ok to enforce my boundaries. My daughter seemed a bit happier yesterday. I'm hoping that she felt listened to and respected. There will always be bitchy girls at school trying to bring her down but as long as she has self esteem and confidence, I'm certain she can rise above it and show the bullies she's not bothered by their words. It's my job to help her build up her confidence enough to help protect herself from catty comments. I think listening to her and encouraging her to spend time with her lovely friends who don't want to bring her down, will help.

Nands, I was in tears reading about your story of the school play. I could see it as a film. You explained so brilliantly how alcohol seemed like the perfect solution to your pain. I'm so happy you're sounding so strong Nands. You've been through so much and your words have helped me more than you can ever know. Thank you xx

Kev, great to hear from you! I'm sure you will have a wonderful family one day. I admire you so much for taking all these steps at a young age. I was stumbling out of every nightclub in London at your age... A million miles from any kind of spiritual awakening! I don't do AA so I don't know what step 4 is but it sounds very intense. I guess just to echo Ananda, it's bound to be great to confront all these aspects of your personality but remember to cut yourself some slack. We're all human.... We all mess up but all we can ever do is try to do the next best thing. So excited about your year anniversary Kev!!!

So I think Steely should be posting again very soon!! Very excited to hear from her. Steely, if you're reading this .... I've missed you!! Come back woman, we want to hear from you. Hope everyone has, will have or had a good day. Love to everyone xxxx

Steely

I'm still here kev just been in solitary for a while and frankly feeling feeling pretty traumatised by the whole experience, for reasons unbeknown. I'm open to suggestion.

I have racked my brain for reason but unless I can recover my posts cannot see that I said anything that deserved such a punitive approach. At least nothing greater than other posts I have seen scattered throughout this website. It matters little now, sobriety being all that does, and the not holding of resentments.

If it is possible for my posts to be retrieved I would appreciate a highlighting of of my transgressions but doubt that is possible, they no longer belong to me. I feel as though I was not afforded natural justice nor right of reply, the very basic principles of a 'democracy'.

I spoke with my psychiatrist on Thursday and am feeling a whole lot better, I will continue to look into SR but will not be contributing as at previous levels. Hold the applause .

In the racking of my brain in search for reason I have thought that perhaps my use of the word "Supervision" in respect to you Dee not travelling too well yourself, might have been misconstrued in the negative.

"Supervision" in the mental health 'industry' simply means peer support. My psychiatrist has a Supervisor, his Supervisor has a Supervisor, and so it goes.

People with large case loads of people with major problems need others to talk with and this is the only place I was coming from, trying to be supportive, completely irrespective of my political views.

I have not felt the need to drink nor to smoke throughout this entire ordeal simply seeing myself as a non-drinker, life on life's terms, and I have succeeded with flying colours.

Now that I have more money with reduction in my rent I am eating so much better and am preparing to visit our National Gallery in Canberra to view an exhibition of Russian Avante Garde artists.

The exhibition is free and will spend a couple of days looking around our National Capital. I've not seen our new Parliament House and am looking forward.

My daughter is visiting on Monday and we are going to the Aquatic Centre, though unfortunately I did another vertebra in so think freestyle will be out and will just float.

I felt tempted to drink with a "what the heck" attitude but instead bought myself a really classy Italian lounge from the second hand furniture shop. A much better investment.

My thoughts and best wishes are with you all and there is not one person on the Nobenders thread I have not developed a fond affection.

Nothing else matters outside of sobriety. Stay strong.

kenton

Yay! Steely! Great to hear from you. Sorry to hear about the other vertebra in your back. Is there any treatment you can get for it? Sounds like you have great stuff to look forward to. I'm so so happy you're back xxxx

tgirl

🕊

kenton

Hello tgirl!! Xxx

Steely

Peace to the world tgirl, and thanks for being there kenton.

I have osteoporosis which causes a weakening of the bones. Many post menopausal women have it, and my mother had it really badly. There are new drugs for it but I am allergic to them, had such a terrible reaction on the very first dose. I'm seeing the endocrinologist on the 27th to discuss.

At the moment, good diet, weight bearing exercise, not drinking, (I'm not) not smoking (I'm not), are what are recommended and that's what I'm trying to do. Calcium supplements fortified with Vitamin D also prescribed. I recommend all post menopausal women to be tested for it,they call it "the silent killer."

The fractures are called "compression fractions of the vertebra" and can be caused it seems now, with very little exertion. Not good.

I'm going to take leave from SR and just go look after myself I found that even opening the site this morning sent me into anxiety. Not good, either.

So, the day is young the sun is shining and have had a good breakfast after sleeping really well last night.

I wish everyone the best and if at any point I offended anyone with my political comments it was not my intention to offend. Frankly, I thought they were slightly funny, and think Alec Baldwin might have gotten a bit of a laugh too.

Ananda

Steely - you certainly didn't offend me! I'm sorry you are feeling so anxious about coming on SR. I so looked forward to your return!

I'm sorry to hear about your back issues. I'll be hoping that the doctor can help with something other than the traditional treatments.

I'm watching Mindhunter with Chris right now .. will check back later.

kenton

Ditto Steely, you certainly never offended me! I'm sorry you've been so upset by all of this. I'm not sure what the solution is. I want to be here to celebrate the fast-approaching first anniversaries but I think I will then spend less time online. I guess that's the purpose of SR - to support us when we need it but ultimately the goal is to live strong, sober lives in the real world. Whatever happens Steely, you are my friend for life. I love you very much and I'm so proud that you have dealt with everything sober.

Hope everyone has a brilliant day. I'm on a train to the coast on my way to meet a girl I've become friends with on the 24 hour thread. I'll check back in on my way home. Love to everyone xxxx

Ladyshipwreck

I created a private Nobenders Facebook group.

It is closed and cannot be seen by the public. I made it this evening, so I'm the only one on there so far. I haven't posted anything yet. I hope some of you decide to join. I will only accept people who are a member of this class, and will keep it closed/private.

If you don't have a Facebook, it is easy to create a profile. I made a new one just to create the group (because I share my other one with my husband) and it only took a few minutes.

Steely

I have never felt so supported in my entire life LadyShipwreck and you can count me in. I will need instruction on setting up FB but that should be easy enough and look forward to talking without fear or favour. I am so glad that I did not drink throughout this ordeal, and nor did I smoke.

I thank you so much LSW you are a legend, and as I have always predicted Nobenders never bend, particularly on matters of principle. I'm speaking for myself here.

I burst into tears on reading your post you are a wonderful woman. Thank you.

I know it was not for me alone, but still felt embraced and supported by your post.

Onwards sober.

Ladyshipwreck

Thank you Steely. You are awesome and I am proud of you for being so strong. I look forward to hearing EVERYTHING you have to say in the FB group. It is very simple to make an account. You just need to follow the steps and use your email address. If you have any problems or questions just email me and I will try to help.

I should make it clear that I'm not trying to encourage people to leave SR. But we have been told that there is a possibility that our thread could get the axe. Now our group will always have a safe place to meet even if that happens, and no one will have to worry about being banned or censored. It can also be fun to easily share links, pics, songs etc.

I'm grateful to SR for introducing me to my class but I'm over it.

Peace out

Plenny

Hi everyone just popping in to say I'm ok and sober. I unfortunately can't join you all in the FB group because FB doesn't allow anonymity and I really rely on that to feel comfortable opening up.
I hope you'll all be able to communicate freely with each other in there.
It's a better forum for that subject matter.
Here, I really do like to escape politics because the events of the day plague me and trigger me. I am looking forward to feeling comfortable coming back to a place I can focus on me as an individual and my/our personal spheres and recovery.

Steely

We all have our own ways and places in feeling comfortable Plenny. I do not feel comfortable here, you on a FB page. And all of that is OK, I don't expect that I will be talking politics or "that subject matter", I expect I will talk about many things. I feel very constrained here on SR.

I want to be me too Plenny and as before we all have our own ways of achieving that end.

I understand where you are coming from, but wish you had PM'd me with your concerns, I would have obliged you entirely.

In all our journeys are different, and we all find our own ways of remaining sober, SR is not for me, as AA is not for me.

Have decided to stick with the 'professionals' and read a good book, then visit the National Gallery to view the Russian Avante Garde.

Sobriety is all that really counts and I wish you all of the very best.

Dee74

I think this thread needs a fresh start.
Please join us here.

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...part-13-a.html (Class of November 2016 Support Thread Part 13)

D