Babs1234

thanks Wehav--makes good sense.
Babs

Gilmer

Pulling for you, Duff!

tootsl1

All done and Duffted! Good one We!

Sounds like it is going 'our' way Duff!

back atcher Sass!

Saskia

Hi We, not doing much but am good. Feeling a bit quiet but thankful to not have any signs of my winter depressions. Gut acting up so i’m mostly home bound but things could be so much worse! Moving to the OFH was definitely a good decision for me.

Duff, is it all over?

Duffster

We, it's so true. These last two days were exhausting and when we were leaving yesterday my lawyer and her associate said let's go get you tequila, lots and lots of tequila. Why tequila I have no idea (lol) but it was literally the last thing I wanted to do or have - I just wanted to get my kids, go home and soak in a long hot bath. You get to a point where it doesn't make sense to make your problems worse with a mind altering substance, so true. Stay strong, Babs, you've got this!!!!!

I wish I could tell you it was over but it's not!! We didn't finish ugh! It was a blow but really the entire trial is overwhelmingly going in our favor. I mean overwhelmingly. We just need more time ugh! I am the last to testify so really it's all behind us and the entire trial will end with my testimony, crafted as I want it after hearing and noting every detail of the last two days. Oh his lawyer will cross examine me and it's going to stink but I've already been through it twice and deposed twice, they have no surprises and I'm used to it by now lol. If they did call me yesterday afternoon I would have been exhausted and frustrated and not on "my game." I'm sad it's not over but now that the worst is behind us, the hard work already done, I'm feeling good about it. But it is December with all those darn holidays so we're probably looking at January (ugh ugh ugh). Oh well, what's a few more weeks at this point, right??

The most vindicating part was that the judge and everyone else saw him and his father for what they are and they were caught in lie after lie. After 9 years of living with it I really really really have to admit it felt good to finally have them exposed.

Sass, I'm so happy you're so happy there! I can sense a contentness in you since you moved there.

And thanks everyone for your encouragement & support - it means the world to me, as always, xoxo

Gilmer

I’m so glad that the truth is coming out, Duff. Sorry it’s dragging out, but you have a really good insight that now you’ll have time to craft your statement and be totally on your game.

I’ll pray that they can squeeze you in somehow before Christmas!

Babs1234

I too am glad it's coming to an end Duff. It's difficult and the holidays always make it worse. You sound like you are very much on stable ground. Hugs.
Sass, Yes, you do sound more at peace. I'm glad that you are happy where you are at.
I guess my Step daughter is coming today and my MIL ---well, it's just a matter of time. this is a terrible thing to say but, I want to run away.
Babs

Gilmer

(((((Babs)))))

Saskia

(((Duff))), you have come such a long way! It sounds like you weren’t even tempted by the tequila idea 👍

Babs, I learned once that feelings just “are”, they are not inherently good or bad. Acting on them is a different matter. I understand your wanting to run away. After going through the deaths of both of my parents (one very fast, the other slower) and living here at the OFH, I am not afraid of it anymore. Has that feeling of wanting to run away been a strong one for you often?

Duffster

And wow. What a reminder of the effects. One of the women texted yesterday morning, after the night of tequila, that she fell in the shower the night before and had a concussion and couldn't move (!!!). We all know what happened. I hadn't slept in days and not at all that night and was hoping to relax and go for a run in the morning. Instead, I receive a frantic text on my way to dropping the boys off at school asking if I can cover an important hearing for her at 8:45. I ran home threw on a suit, no makeup, no shower, hair in a pony tail, stopped by the office and grabbed the file, and made it to the courthouse by 8:40. In the meantime, I called the other person who went out the night before to see if she was showered and ready and able to go instead and she was just waking up, of course. No, I don't miss those days one bit.

Babs, I have had strong feelings of wanting to run away before - most of my life. I'm trying to learn to just face things and then moving past them because Sass is right, feelings are just feelings and they usually don't last forever. How are you today?

tootsl1

I still get those feelings Babs, sometimes it is one big thing, other times it's an accumulation of things I wished I didn't have to deal with. Often, these issues pass without me feeling overwhelmed. Alcohol would always be a way of 'running away' but the problems are still there waiting for you to sober up.

Have you considered talking to your doctor? You may be feeling depressed or anxious, or overwhelmed. They may be able to help you.

Alternatively, try some relaxation techniques, they can be really helpful. There are a lot of free apps or videos on YouTube that can help.

Oh Duff, the memories or feeling so wasted the day after, lethargic, brainless, exhausted... I am so happy I do not get that any more. And if I fall in the shower, it will be my clumsiness!
I am so glad things are going your way in the court, and you are being vindicated in your choices. You will get to the end of this Hun, and are already so much stronger for facing it head on. X

Hugs all

Babs1234

Hi everyone!
well, the step daughter goes back today. Oh man, It's a good thing that a person
doesn't really know things ahead of time. I'm proud of myself I actually kept my mouth shut. She went into my MIL house and took some jewelry and other things and I feel so bad. But, my husband knows so, I'm staying out of it. There are a few Grand Children and this one knew what she was after. ! ! ! ! She is still with us for heavens sake. My MIL I mean.-----Anyway---This is the first that I have expressed myself and thank you for listening. She will be flying out of here in a few hours and I have asked God to help me get through all this. And you know what? I will be just fine.
Duff you are sounding great !
Hugs everyone !!
Babs

trachemys

Duff, in the middle of all you have going on, you lending support to to others:

"Stay strong, Babs, you've got this!!!!!"

Strong.

Gilmer

Hi, Trach! It’s great to see you!

tootsl1

Death - impending or occurred - brings out the best and the worst in family members Babs. I'm sorry you are in the middle of it. Deep breaths x

Saskia

Babs, step daughter sounds difficult! It can be surprising how some family members can feel so entitled that they just take what they want. It becomes much less important as we get older but for me it certainly affects my trust in that person permanently. I think it’s more common than we realize.

Babs1234

oh how true Sass---Before she left she brought out empty boxes (from shoes, jewelry, and etc. ) that she wanted me to put in the garbage and then when we get home from the air port I go to change the bedding in the room that she slept in and she left a partial jewelry box with earrings and a necklace that she took and apparently decided it wasn't good enough. So, now I get to take it back and put among my MIL stuff. I just might make her dad do that. But, I made it through this time so, that's how I'm looking at things. We did stop at the nursing home before we went to the Air Port and my MIL is so frail.
Like you said Toots--- deep breaths and it does work.
Hi Trach ! and everyone---Have a good day. I'm just going to sit and smile to myself for awhile. Because I can. ha ha ha ha
Babs

Duffster

Trach

Saskia

I never cease to be delighted by seeing all of us grow and enjoy our lives after spending time running away from everything. The lows are still painful, the highs are amazing and in-between is good, too. When things are tough, I remind myself that “this, too, shall pass”. Life is good!

Duffster

I can't believe I forgot to mention this...I'm leaving for Israel tomorrow! I'll be gone Tuesday to Tuesday. My mother is taking me