Class of November 2016 Support Thread Part 11
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 2,740
Thanks Dee!
This loan is offering a pretty low fixed interest taste. I actually had said the words to myself recently: "I'd love to just get everything on one line of credit with this company so I can leave my big bank and all those cards and join a credit union"
I'll check out the links too! I'm feeling more positive about tackling this problem than I have in a long time. Thank you!
This loan is offering a pretty low fixed interest taste. I actually had said the words to myself recently: "I'd love to just get everything on one line of credit with this company so I can leave my big bank and all those cards and join a credit union"
I'll check out the links too! I'm feeling more positive about tackling this problem than I have in a long time. Thank you!
Guest
Join Date: Apr 2017
Location: UK
Posts: 2,256
Omg Badge! My heart was in my mouth when I read your post. The spitting thing is revolting. I'm praying that the grossness is the full extent of it. But how exciting is your job?? I'm like Poppy, obsessed with real life crime stories. It's a very important job you're doing Badge, you must feel proud. Just so awful about the spitting thing. What's up with people??? So glad you love your haircut and great detective skills finding the stylist. You should write a book Badge about your experiences in the prison. I would definitely read it.
Glad you are feeling like things are getting more sorted Plenny. From reading your posts you certainly sound like you're bouncing straight back from that one glass of wine. Rather than starting you off on a downward slope it seems like that one glass has propelled you into taking positive action. It's great to read.
Poppy, glad your mum's tests indicated something that can be treated. Hope she feels ok.
Steely, hope you are beginning to feel settled and look forward to hearing from you when you are.
Nands, good luck with the surgery. I'm praying for you.
Hello Kev!!
I'm doing okay. AV is deafening at the moment. Telling me all kinds of bs. Basically it all boils down to my insecurities. ...... its telling me I'm worthless, no one cares about me, no one likes me, no one would notice if I disappeared blah blah blah. It's exhausting listening to it all the time but it's helpful that I can now identify it as being my AV. It's a bit like a toddler having a tantrum. I can't run away from it but I don't have to give in. And if I ignore it for long enough, it always seems to get bored eventually and shut up!!
Love to everyone xxxx
Glad you are feeling like things are getting more sorted Plenny. From reading your posts you certainly sound like you're bouncing straight back from that one glass of wine. Rather than starting you off on a downward slope it seems like that one glass has propelled you into taking positive action. It's great to read.
Poppy, glad your mum's tests indicated something that can be treated. Hope she feels ok.
Steely, hope you are beginning to feel settled and look forward to hearing from you when you are.
Nands, good luck with the surgery. I'm praying for you.
Hello Kev!!
I'm doing okay. AV is deafening at the moment. Telling me all kinds of bs. Basically it all boils down to my insecurities. ...... its telling me I'm worthless, no one cares about me, no one likes me, no one would notice if I disappeared blah blah blah. It's exhausting listening to it all the time but it's helpful that I can now identify it as being my AV. It's a bit like a toddler having a tantrum. I can't run away from it but I don't have to give in. And if I ignore it for long enough, it always seems to get bored eventually and shut up!!
Love to everyone xxxx
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Queensland
Posts: 568
Don't believe a word your AV is sprouting Kenton, I haven't met you in person but I know you are wonderful, kind, sincere, compassionate and funny, list could go on and on. You are integral to the Nobenders and to me personally, given our very similar situations. It's like I have a doppelgänger in the UK and you have one in Australia lol.
Tell your AV to F off
it's a big fat liar!
Tell your AV to F off
it's a big fat liar!
Guest
Join Date: Apr 2017
Location: UK
Posts: 2,256
Thanks Dee, Poppy and Plenny. AV is being an absolute nightmare at the moment. I was going into a meeting earlier and suddenly I thought, "everyone would be much happier if you (me) would just drop dead". Where the f*** did that come from? I don't think that. I love my family and my life. The last thing I want to do is die. So where did that horrible thought come from?? It's like I'm angering the beast because I'm not giving it what it wants so it's turning on me. But it is me!! So I'm turning on myself. It's so confusing. I just have to keep it simple and know that whatever my AV tells me is bs. It will literally tell me anything to get me to drink. As long as I don't drink, this will pass xxxx
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 2,740
Oh I totally catch myself saying the worst things in my head sometimes Kenton! And I really surprise myself!! I do have a person who used to be in my life who I credit that negative self talk to. It is definitely my mother's voice. It makes it a little easier for me to separate my self from it. But she takes over sometimes. It is painful! And makes me want a drink
Woke up feeling pretty reset this morning. I made a to-do list last night before bed (helps me sleep), I wrote in my journal, I read some self help stuff about overthinking and mindfulness online.
I'm about to call that lender to get more info on the consolidation option. Fingers crossed
Woke up feeling pretty reset this morning. I made a to-do list last night before bed (helps me sleep), I wrote in my journal, I read some self help stuff about overthinking and mindfulness online.
I'm about to call that lender to get more info on the consolidation option. Fingers crossed
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 2,740
Looks like I was approved! It's still a hefty bill every month but it is lower than I was paying, after interest it will be less than I would have paid, and I'm not juggling two balances anymore. This is something I have been wanting for SO long. It's a big deal to me. I may not have won the lottery but this is progress.
I am tattooing R tonight by the way. While we are revealing our professions...
Also I am 36 I forgot to respond to that earlier. I will be in September anyway.
I am tattooing R tonight by the way. While we are revealing our professions...
Also I am 36 I forgot to respond to that earlier. I will be in September anyway.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Queensland
Posts: 568
A tattooist in the Nobenders. Awesome I'm thinking of getting another tat to remind me of my journey so far. No idea what or where but I know it will be small lol. Got a fairly big one on the back of my neck which bloody hurt like a mo fo.
I'm thinking of getting another tat to remind me of my journey so far. No idea what or where but I know it will be small lol. Got a fairly big one on the back of my neck which bloody hurt like a mo fo.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 26,425
Hi,
I just got home from the hospital and all is well ... really great. I'll tell more later...right now saying hi to dogs and my mom (ugh) is here for a few days ... the sooner she leaves the better as Chris and I will be ok on our own.
I just scanned a few of the posts below and it looks to me that the Nobenders are struggling at times and then pulling together with plenty of love, respect, kindess and examples of growth and sobriety. It as just as I expected
Now I don't have a clear picture yet as haven't read much so will catch up later. Sorry ... It's just hard to get away from this feeling I give my self of my mother's prying eyes ... some is real, but I add to it parts that are not really there (I think).
I am remembering that I am the creator of my karma and heir to my karma ... not in the sorta pop Buddhist way, not that straight forward ... but it is like pain exists in life but I create my own suffering around it. It's all that I add to what isn't there that has to go...
ok ... gotta run ... love all of you each and every one all all all
I just got home from the hospital and all is well ... really great. I'll tell more later...right now saying hi to dogs and my mom (ugh) is here for a few days ... the sooner she leaves the better as Chris and I will be ok on our own.
I just scanned a few of the posts below and it looks to me that the Nobenders are struggling at times and then pulling together with plenty of love, respect, kindess and examples of growth and sobriety. It as just as I expected
Now I don't have a clear picture yet as haven't read much so will catch up later. Sorry ... It's just hard to get away from this feeling I give my self of my mother's prying eyes ... some is real, but I add to it parts that are not really there (I think).
I am remembering that I am the creator of my karma and heir to my karma ... not in the sorta pop Buddhist way, not that straight forward ... but it is like pain exists in life but I create my own suffering around it. It's all that I add to what isn't there that has to go...
ok ... gotta run ... love all of you each and every one all all all
Guest
Join Date: Apr 2017
Location: UK
Posts: 2,256
Nands, so great that surgery went well and you are home. I hope this eases all the symptoms you were suffering with. So, so glad it went well.
Wow! A tattooist and someone who works in a prison....I don't think I'm cool enough to hang out with you guys!! I work in an office in London.... my work is fairly dull but I'm based in a great part of the city. I thought about getting a tattoo after dad died but I couldn't think of what. I saw someone on the tube the other day with "never doubt the decision" tattooed on his arm, thought that was pretty cool. Glad you are sounding so positive Plenny. Does R like his tattoo?
Hope you've had a good Friday Poppy and Dee. I'm feeling miles better today. The latest onslaught from my AV has passed. I imagine it skulking off, planning the next attack. It can only beat me if I let it. It's awesome feeling back in control. Interesting that you think your negative voice is your mother, Plenny. I never made that connection in my head but it makes perfect sense. I start my cbt therapy next month and I feel now I know exactly what issues I need to address. The negative voice is number 1 on the hit list. I need to learn how to talk back to it without letting it rock my world for days. This time last year I was drinking to drown it out so progress is already being made.
Steely, can't wait to hear about your new home. Kev, hope all is going well in your world.
Lots of love to everyone xxx
Wow! A tattooist and someone who works in a prison....I don't think I'm cool enough to hang out with you guys!! I work in an office in London.... my work is fairly dull but I'm based in a great part of the city. I thought about getting a tattoo after dad died but I couldn't think of what. I saw someone on the tube the other day with "never doubt the decision" tattooed on his arm, thought that was pretty cool. Glad you are sounding so positive Plenny. Does R like his tattoo?
Hope you've had a good Friday Poppy and Dee. I'm feeling miles better today. The latest onslaught from my AV has passed. I imagine it skulking off, planning the next attack. It can only beat me if I let it. It's awesome feeling back in control. Interesting that you think your negative voice is your mother, Plenny. I never made that connection in my head but it makes perfect sense. I start my cbt therapy next month and I feel now I know exactly what issues I need to address. The negative voice is number 1 on the hit list. I need to learn how to talk back to it without letting it rock my world for days. This time last year I was drinking to drown it out so progress is already being made.
Steely, can't wait to hear about your new home. Kev, hope all is going well in your world.
Lots of love to everyone xxx
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Queensland
Posts: 568
I also have an office job... in the exciting field of IT, specifically software for law firms. Can't get much more cool than that right HAHA.
I love the differences in employment, age, locations for all of us. Makes our group very eclectic which is super cool.
Plenny or Badge, can't remember which of you recently got your hair done... but one of you prompted me to get mine done. I'm now a blondie use to have very dark hair so big change. But I love it.
Off to watch some true crime shows now.
Love to each and everyone of you xoxo
I love the differences in employment, age, locations for all of us. Makes our group very eclectic which is super cool.
Plenny or Badge, can't remember which of you recently got your hair done... but one of you prompted me to get mine done. I'm now a blondie
use to have very dark hair so big change. But I love it. Off to watch some true crime shows now.
Love to each and everyone of you xoxo
Guest
Join Date: Apr 2017
Location: UK
Posts: 2,256
Our nightmare neighbours across the road reversed into my husband's parked van this morning. Put a massive dent into the side. Normal people would knock on the door and give their insurance details. Neighbours from hell hurl abuse across the street, call my husband ******** and say they hope I get cancer. All whilst I'm getting the kids in the car. Nice. And I didn't say a word to them. The police advice is to not to engage with them and I haven't spoken one word to them since January. I just have to keep a log of all the abuse. It's such an emotional drain living opposite them but I refuse to let them derail me or dampen my positive mood. Hope everyone is doing ok. Enjoy the true crime shows Poppy xxx
Member
Join Date: Aug 2016
Location: Queensland
Posts: 568
That is terrible Kenton, what sort of scum would do that and say such horrid things. I hope they get kicked out of your street soon.
Some people just sicken me to the core! Not sure I would be able to refrain from saying or doing something back but I have an occasional volatility that rears up. Involuntarily. One thing that I am working on with my psych is the fact that there are horribly bad people in this world that have no sense of right and wrong or any consideration, empathy or compassion. I want to change them all but I can't. So I get angry and frustrated.
I'm glad you have the calmness to ignore them.
Some people just sicken me to the core! Not sure I would be able to refrain from saying or doing something back but I have an occasional volatility that rears up. Involuntarily. One thing that I am working on with my psych is the fact that there are horribly bad people in this world that have no sense of right and wrong or any consideration, empathy or compassion. I want to change them all but I can't. So I get angry and frustrated.
I'm glad you have the calmness to ignore them.
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