Steely

Scrolled down but wanted to say we all seem to be feeling a bit depressed and overwhelmed at the moment. Must be something in the mineral water

You'll emerge Plenny, we ALL will (Nobenders don't bend) so long as we stay sober, and that's exactly what we're doing, 'cause we're smart and creative.

Going back to read others, and hope everyone is still going well even though we are being bowled a few dodgey balls. But we can catch, hey?

Hope you start to feel better soon Plenny, if I've learnt nothing else, I know it will pass. And it feels so good the next morning.

Steely

Badge volunteering really does help, but you've gotta find the one that suits and utilises your wonderful skills. Just the talking with other people, volunteering helps a whole lot in starting to engage with people again. No more isolated drinking. Oh my.

I would find it really hard to work in a shelter where it was obvious that the animals were not being treated properly. Poor little things don't even know, they are just forced to cop to it.

I have only ever worked in Not For Profit Organisations, only twice in the avaricious, non caring corporate world. I worked with with disadvantaged people who were being ripped by the Corporates in taking Government money for 'helping' these people.

I had to get out because I felt like a complete fraud, and fell asleep at every meeting. I just couldn't do it.

Best thing was that I was able to circumnavigate the system and help these people in my own way. Took me about three times as long, but I didn't care.

Is there any way you can volunteer at a reputable organisation?

I don't know how it works in America but here, you just have to Google "volunteers wanted" and a whole list of volunteering positions appear.

Probably telling you what you already know, but thought it might help.

It's so good to see you again badge.

badgerden

Positive and strong thoughts to you and your pup Kenton!

I have decided that I will not return to the animal shelter. The dogs are weighing heavy in my mind and heart and I cannot just afford that sadness in this stage of my recovery. Maybe if I felt I could actually make a significant difference I would keep going, but I cannot see that happening. Someone here suggested possibly visiting a adult assisted living center, and that is very much a possiblity. i could possibly even bring one of my dogs with me. Like you said Steely, there is something out there that fits my needs and schedule. I will persevere.

My plans and actions for getting and staying sober have been to do more journal writing, exercising and diet. I have been looking into possibly finding a local sponsor of some sort, that can talk me through different areas. I am not comfortable with AA, so am looking at other options.

Well I had best get busy before my bosses notice my loitering,,,,

Badge

Poppy79

Good morning peeps
I have a bit of an issue that I am not sure how to deal with so any advice is appreciated. One of the wedding guests whom I've known for years but hadn't seen in a couple (she moved to Sydney and I hopped of Facebook for ages) caught up with me for lunch this week. I am all prepped to tell her about my journey this last 9 months, about going into a psych hospital and getting on the road to recovery. Turns out the groom told her I had gone to rehab whilst at the wedding after I had left. I'm upset by that! I am not 'friends' with the groom like I am the bride.
Do I bring this up with the bride? Do I tell her I am hurt and upset that something quite personal should never have been divulged by one of my friends by another who isn't technically my friend?
How did this even come up on conversation I wonder? Could it be I wasn't drinking at the wedding and that surprised my friend. I didn't think to ask my friend because I was quite shocked she already knew.
How do I deal with this? And how many other people at the wedding knew I wonder.
Not impressed.

Dee74

Hi Poppy

I think people who don't have our problem don't understand how shameful
it can be for us, or how hard recovery is.

Your friend probably thought nothing in mentioning it to her husband and he in turn probably though nothing of telling someone else.

People talk - especially people who never had anything more challenging than an ingrown toenail.

It doesn't make it right, but it happens.

Although I know you feel aggrieved and you want to kick some butt, I think you're much better off to look at it this way - you have a problem and you're not only doing something about it, you're beating it.

There's nothing shameful about that and nothing shameful about you or your struggle

D

Poppy79

Thanks Dee sound advice as always.
I just don't want it to gnaw away at me either. I would like to say (nicely) to bride that I was/am hurt that groom told my friend about my recovery. And could he please cease and desist from telling others.
I'm not ashamed per say, but it's also not his place to say anything. I can understand bride saying something but certainly not the groom.

Ladyshipwreck

Hi! It has been over a month since I last posted:/ Well things have been really busy. I am sure I will be on here more when things settle down.
As I was scrolling to get to this new thread I gotta say I appreciate the pic of the hedgehog attacking the city posted by Ananda. Love it lol

Also Kenton, the title "Ozark" jumped out at me because I am also a fan. I totally binge watched that whole season unfortunately. I said the same thing, that it reminded me a lot of Breaking Bad. But not so much that it feels like they're ripping it. I can't get over how much Ruth looks like Justin Timberlake lol

Other than that I don't have much to say right now. I'll have 9 months tomorrow! Woohoo!

I remember when I first joined a class on this site, when I was in the April Fools group of 2014 I was very discouraged because I kept slipping. I just want to say if anyone of you feel that way about yourself, don't. Don't get discouraged! I just remember how so many people in my class seemed to be doing so good, and although I genuinely felt happy for them, I got down on myself because the longest I ever made it was 3 months. After that I kept slipping. And I felt selfish for coming back here and posting about it even though it helped. I also worried that it might be negative for other people's sobriety to hear about me getting drunk again. Maybe that was just my AV pulling me away from the help I was getting from my support group. Anyway, I didn't even mean to get into this and I don't know where it's coming from. I don't even know if there's anyone in this group who slips up like I did when I first joined because I've been a pretty crappy member of the class! But if there is, hang in there! Don't stop stopping drinking.

Dee74

Great to hear from you LSW

D

Plenny

Oh my goodness what a week for everyone!! I'm caught up but I don't even know how to address it all. This is an intense time.

Hello Badge and LSW!!! Good to see you

Thanks everyone for shouting out it helped a lot this week. Woke up feeling MUCH better today. I do feel good when I am able to help people through hard times. I've had plenty of hard times myself and had to tough them out BY myself, so in a way I think I might know what some people need for extra support. It's sometimes just as simple as covering those work shifts, maybe doing someone's laundry, dropping off a lasagna so they don't get hungry or stressed about cooking.... etc.

Patching things up still with Bf. I think I want to stop calling him Bf on here and just use the letter R instead. It's more humanizing.

So R and I are healing up, I just sent him off to work with lunch (again makes me feel extra good just to know everyone I care about it eating haha). I feel contemplative this morning. I might even disappear for a bit and rest up some more before tonight's long shift. I think I need to recharge.

Hang in there everyone, I know it's a wild ride right now... There are things I want to respond to but might have to wait till I let them sink in a bit

Hope you all have a great day/night wherever you are

Steely

Hi LSW so good to see you and congratulations on your 9 months.

Like you I have slipped many times but this time could no longer ignore, rationalise, justify my drinking because it simply did not work. Never! So good to now have that knowledge. Freedom.

I'm moving on Monday and have to get all computer stuff installed and don't know how long that will take but will probably be off air for a while.

I'll try to use my phone just to check in but hate hate those tiny little keys disingned to send people insane.

Wishing everyone all of the very best during my absence, and how I didn't drink during this time gives me real hope for the future.

If you are reading kenton hope that you are doing well and taking advantage if your break. Sometimes it's just what we need.

Love you all. xxx

Ananda

Quick check in ... I'm pretty swamped trying to get everything in place prior to Mom's arrival on Sunday. Then Monday will be going to see the eclipse out of town, Then Tuesday to a hotel near the out of town hospital where I will have the procedure, and the procedure on Wednesday before returning home on Thursday.

Just sayin that althought I'll be checking in as much as I can I may not be as "engaged" in the rush of stuff. Don't worry because if there were any problem at all my son would use my id to come in and tell you. This is a very common procedure and shouldn't be any problem.

I gotta run ... love you all and will check back later today.

Steely

Wishing you all of the very best with your operation on Monday Nands. Everything will be fine, I'm sure, but bet you'll be glad when it's all over. Not the same, but similar to how I'm feeling to be eventually moved and settled. I want it over.

Nands I haven't been much of a friend during this last period as everything has been so frantic and not much chance to do anything other than check in, then back to packing.

You have been a great friend to me Nands and would hate for you to think I have have not been there for you when needed, particularly with this upcoming operation.

When things settle down here I hope to get back on track and be able to keep up with everyone properly.

I do hope you understand that moving is a nightmare and am doing it on my own which is utterly exhausting.

My love to all, and back soon, depending on how efficient Telecom are, they don't have a great reputation.

Have been awake since 4:00am and am exhausted already. Hope I can remember where I packed my blankets.

Funny, I carried a blanket (under my arm) to the dry cleaners cleaners yesterday and a bloke looked at me sympathetically thinking that I was homeless.

Dee74

Best wishes to you Nands - and you Steely - for next week.

Wishing everyone else the best too of course

D

Steely

I should have asked that bloke for a ciggie and a couple of bucks.

Ha ha, I could do with it.

Poppy79

Good luck with your surgery Nands, sending positive thoughts your way.
Good luck with your move Steely, hoping it all goes smoothly and you settle in quick.
Kenton, I hope your fur baby is okay. More positive thoughts currently being sent over to the UK.
Congrats on 9 months LSW awesome.
Hubby has the flu so I am spraying glen 20 like its liquid gold lol. I really do not want to get sick and apparently the flu is quite severe this year in Australia.
Kev, Plenny, Dee and everyone else have a wonderful day xoxo

Plenny

Hey everyone, long night at work. No cravings. R is off the wagon again. Trying not to freak out and get controlling, trying to remember that I can not control. I can only stay my own path.

It's very hard to do. I go up and down a lot. It's very hard caring about someone. It's the same old story y'all.

Anyway I have two more weeks before we go on vacation. Visiting his parents and some of my old friends. His Mother was in AA and is in recovery. My old friends are also sober now. Hopefully this is a good omen

Steely

Sounds like a good omen to me me Plenny, we've got him outnumbered.

Another good omen is seeing how much you have changed with your understanding that we can only change ourselves, and set positive example. I'm still learning that one too, but gee it helps, big time.

Impossible for sobriety not to be a good example when compared with the horrors of drinking. Different if he were a 'social' drinker, but from I can understand he's not, and dearly wants sobriety for himself.

Keep setting those examples Plenny he will see you shining, and want the shine for himself too, how could he not?

Am going to post a video of the song we played at my Mums funeral. It reminds us of us too in that we are all in this together, together and alone. How cool is that my sisters, and you too Gilmer whose name I saw pop up there a bit back.

Thinking of you Nands. Thinking of you kenton, my little chickadees. And now you can hit me with the sop mop.

Steely

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=cb6FEONC8r0

kenton

Hi everyone,

My dog is home! And slowly getting back to his normal self. As am I. Not sure why everything became so overwhelming so fast. It's great to be able to think about it with a rational, sober mind. The great thing is, drinking never appealed once. Not once. I think I'm making progress even though sometimes it doesn't feel like I am.

Steely, so exciting that the move is happening on Monday!! I'd love to be with you to help you pack. Good luck with the move Steely, it's going to be the start of something absolutely marvellous, I just know it.

Nands, enjoy the eclipse and good luck with the surgery. I'm sending you gallons of love xx

Poppy, I'd be angry too if someone spoke about my recovery behind my back. What's it got to do with anyone else (except really close family members etc). I know I'd want to confront the bride and her new husband but I also know I'm not the most rational of people. Dee's advice is better. Let it go. If you talk about it, it's turning it into a bigger issue than it needs to be. But yes, I totally understand your anger.

Badger, great to hear you sounding so good. I wouldn't be able to work in an animal rescue because I'd want to bring them all home. Everyone thought I was deranged last year because I stopped a cat killing a pigeon and then set up a pigeon hospital in my garden shed to nurse the pigeon back to health. Everyone said the pigeon is vermin and I should let it die but I still saw it as a living creature that deserved a chance. I got it to a certain level of recovery and then a local wildlife centre came and took it away to try to rehabilitate it back into the wild. I sometimes wonder what happened to that pigeon. I hope it made it.

Kev, great to hear from you. You sound great! Hope you have a brilliant time in Greece.

LSW - I hope they make a second series of Ozark. My husband and I absolutely loved it and yes Ruth does look like Justin Timberlake!!

Plenny, you sound like a kind soul and the kind of person I want to become. I fear that if I turned up with a lasagna, people would use it as a door stop or something. My cooking is not good. But the one thing I can do, apart from rescuing pigeons, is talk. So now I volunteer for Help the Aged and a couple of times a week when my kids are doing sports and I have to sit in the car and wait to ferry them home, I phone this elderly man who lives on his own and has no family. I talk about what I've been doing and he tells me stories about his life. I enjoy talking to him. I get as much out of it as he does. I'm glad you're patching things up with R Plenny.

It's good to be back. Love you all so much xxxx

Dee74

I'm glad your dog is back home Kenton

D