One Year and Under Club Part 59
Member
Join Date: Jun 2017
Posts: 1,276
I agree. A diary is certainly helpful, toots. I did buy new one a few weeks ago but I haven’t started it yet. You might be right about the emotional investment in the posts. Quite often I’ll write something and delete it because I worry it might not help the OP. It usual helps me though.
This is a tough stage. I have some sobriety experience (a little now and a fair bit in the past) but I do feel I’m back at the start again. I’m sure things will improve but, right now, I see two and a half years ahead of me before I break even again. An irrational way to think, no?
This is a tough stage. I have some sobriety experience (a little now and a fair bit in the past) but I do feel I’m back at the start again. I’m sure things will improve but, right now, I see two and a half years ahead of me before I break even again. An irrational way to think, no?
Living the life
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,211
Excellent points, DTP and Toots. I've said before that I feel I was in a state of arrested development while an active drinker, and that I was the world's oldest juvenile delinquent. I took pride in my ability to "drink with the boys" and hold my own, and then one day I realized that at a certain age it's really not a good look. It probably never was. I really feel I have matured and grown in the last year, and it is a wonderful thing. My family thinks so too 
Living and Loving Life at Last
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: gods own country
Posts: 12,166
Stronger, posting here on SR, is not always about helping others, sometimes it's about helping ourselves. I know i really benefit from just putting my feelings and thoughts out there at times when I am uncertain.
Next time you go to erase a post, ask yourself why specifically that post.
I get where you are coming from with the 2.5 years thing, and I doubt you can ignore that thought completely. But the way to look at it is that you have 2.5 years of sober experiences to utilise. What has caused your slips? Is it a similar thing each time? If so, what is different about your approach this time and how you will react in the trigger situations?
Helen, keeping up with the boys. What a pathetic thing to be proud of eh? And like you, I decided a drunk granny was not a good look!
Next time you go to erase a post, ask yourself why specifically that post.
I get where you are coming from with the 2.5 years thing, and I doubt you can ignore that thought completely. But the way to look at it is that you have 2.5 years of sober experiences to utilise. What has caused your slips? Is it a similar thing each time? If so, what is different about your approach this time and how you will react in the trigger situations?
Helen, keeping up with the boys. What a pathetic thing to be proud of eh? And like you, I decided a drunk granny was not a good look!
Living the life
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,211
Very true RetiredGuy. One of the benefits of hanging out here was I read so many posts from folks who had thought that after a period of abstinence they would now be able to drink responsibly. Invariably they couldn't, and then they found it even harder to quit the next time. I had a tough enough time quitting this time - I don't need to set myself up for an even harder time in the future. In Elizabeth Vargas' book she tells about a friend telling her that it's a lot easier to stay quit than it is to do day one all over again. I think there's a lot of truth in that.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Singapore
Posts: 190
That feels very true to me, Helen.
This is my first time quitting and my instinct tells me that it is absolutely my best chance to make it stick. The fact that I have handed in my golden ticket makes me more determined to stick with it when I sail a bit close to the wind.
This is my first time quitting and my instinct tells me that it is absolutely my best chance to make it stick. The fact that I have handed in my golden ticket makes me more determined to stick with it when I sail a bit close to the wind.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Australia
Posts: 171
DTP, this is also my first attempt. I would certainly be under the illusion I could moderate if it wasn't for this site. I'm up to 9 weeks now, and there are moments, I won't lie, when I'd like nothing more than just one nice crisp glass of white wine, but it isn't just one, is it? It was never just one then, why would it be now?
Living and Loving Life at Last
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: gods own country
Posts: 12,166
Also, if you have tried moderating in the past, the frustration of keeping to just one or two, of going days in between to 'prove' you don't have a problem? So much harder than getting settled into the idea of not drinking at all. Even when we drink less, we are still obsessed by thoughts of it.
Moderation the times I tried it in the past never, ever worked. Eventually the volume and frequency crept back up to what I was drinking before.
Life is so much smoother when alcohol is not an option needing to be considered.
It's so good to have you here DTP, Stronger and Kerchal, to know you are benefiting from SR and strengthening your resistance to temptation.
Moderation the times I tried it in the past never, ever worked. Eventually the volume and frequency crept back up to what I was drinking before.
Life is so much smoother when alcohol is not an option needing to be considered.
It's so good to have you here DTP, Stronger and Kerchal, to know you are benefiting from SR and strengthening your resistance to temptation.
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,414
I confused abstinence for control a few times.
I soon realise I had a little control as ever.
Although I mused about drinking in the context of 'a couple of drinks' I never really wanted to moderate.
What I really wanted was to drink as much as I liked and not have it impact my life my career, my health or my relationships.
Total fantasyland.
D
I soon realise I had a little control as ever.
Although I mused about drinking in the context of 'a couple of drinks' I never really wanted to moderate.
What I really wanted was to drink as much as I liked and not have it impact my life my career, my health or my relationships.
Total fantasyland.
D
Living and Loving Life at Last
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: gods own country
Posts: 12,166
Originally Posted by Dee74 
What I really wanted was to drink as much as I liked and not have it impact my life my career, my health or my relationships.
Total fantasyland.
D
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: US
Posts: 16,891
Hello friends ~ I went to a meeting this evening.....can't remember the last meeting I've been to, possibly a year? Anyway, I just felt I should go....needing to build up my suit of armor heading into holiday season. Glad you're all here! 
Member
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Singapore
Posts: 190
I certainly need to work on my mindset. For my entire adult life, the Christmas holiday has always been associated with drink, drink and more drink.
It will be very interesting to observe one from a sober perspective.
It will be very interesting to observe one from a sober perspective.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2017
Location: North Georgia Mountains
Posts: 588
The wife and I are headed to Jamaica for three weeks. This annual trip used to involve copious amounts of booze. I really feel that my commitment to sobriety is strong enough that I will not be tempted. However, I am sure the AV will use it to try to weaken my resolve. If he gets too loud, I will be asking you fine people for support! At the present time, I have no desire to start drinking again and I hope it stays that way.
sorry always wanted to use that lame pun!! We'll be here if you need us, have a wonderful time.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
