Class of May 2017 Support Thread Part Two
Member
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 38
Originally Posted by Sunflowerlife 
I'm sorry you drank but glad you came right back here. Did you write out your recovery plan?
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,217
Day 19
Good morning friends.
Rough night last night trying to get the boys to sleep. I need to find a better plan for bedtime on Saturday nights when my husband works. I ended up yelling at my 5 year old at 10 o'clock because I could not get him to stop playing and get in bed. I yelled so loudly he was covering his ears.
I feel like a monster and pretty much hate myself right now.
Then I had a drinking dream where I took a couple swigs from a rum bottle (which happens to be the last drink I had.) In my dream I was upset because I had forgotten I was counting my sober days and realized I had to start over!
That's one thing that does motivate you once you get on a roll with days- you don't want to start over again. My longest stretch was 4 months and 8 days and that was last year. So I cannot wait until I get to 4 months and 9 days. I guess that will happen in September.
Well my 5 year old got up at 6:30. This kid won't give me a break. I am exhausted from sleeping late and just wish he would have slept until 7. Hubby sleeps in on Sundays because he gets home late.
I am going to try really hard not to let anything ruin my morning. I already feel like my adrenals are shot and I'm on edge. Going to look up some Beth Tuttle again.
Happy Sunday sober friends- check in when you can...
I need to take my own advice....
Rough night last night trying to get the boys to sleep. I need to find a better plan for bedtime on Saturday nights when my husband works. I ended up yelling at my 5 year old at 10 o'clock because I could not get him to stop playing and get in bed. I yelled so loudly he was covering his ears.
I feel like a monster and pretty much hate myself right now.
Then I had a drinking dream where I took a couple swigs from a rum bottle (which happens to be the last drink I had.) In my dream I was upset because I had forgotten I was counting my sober days and realized I had to start over!
That's one thing that does motivate you once you get on a roll with days- you don't want to start over again. My longest stretch was 4 months and 8 days and that was last year. So I cannot wait until I get to 4 months and 9 days. I guess that will happen in September.
Well my 5 year old got up at 6:30. This kid won't give me a break. I am exhausted from sleeping late and just wish he would have slept until 7. Hubby sleeps in on Sundays because he gets home late.
I am going to try really hard not to let anything ruin my morning. I already feel like my adrenals are shot and I'm on edge. Going to look up some Beth Tuttle again.
Happy Sunday sober friends- check in when you can...
I need to take my own advice....
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,217
Originally Posted by emme99
Hi everyone, it's the end of day 4. Today is the first day where trying to not drink is not consuming my every thought. I didn't do much today, and I took a couple of naps, so the lack of stress might be why. Whatever it is, I will take it.
I want to look into meditating as well. I've tried it before but never stuck with it. It's hard to clear my mind enough sometimes but I just need to practice I think.
I hope everyone is doing well
Enjoy the rest of your weekend everyone
I want to look into meditating as well. I've tried it before but never stuck with it. It's hard to clear my mind enough sometimes but I just need to practice I think.
I hope everyone is doing well
Enjoy the rest of your weekend everyone
Glad you are feeling better and that the AV was a bit quite yesterday! Hope today is just as good for you
Member
Join Date: Apr 2017
Posts: 67
It seems like forever that I wrote "Day 3 done" but it was only Friday night. Last night was really difficult. The AV was HAMMERING me. Also the stresses of finances, moving, the business really piled up. Wanted to check out so bad.
I didn't. I should feel better about it this morning but don't really. Waking up with a headache. Another full day today, we have an open house so we have to get the place cleaned up and clear out.
Not sure what's going on, just have a lot of depression piling up. Withdrawls? Went to the suicide forum last night. Reminded me things are not that bad but damn, this is a really rough patch of life right now.
Sunday's are the worst
I didn't. I should feel better about it this morning but don't really. Waking up with a headache. Another full day today, we have an open house so we have to get the place cleaned up and clear out.
Not sure what's going on, just have a lot of depression piling up. Withdrawls? Went to the suicide forum last night. Reminded me things are not that bad but damn, this is a really rough patch of life right now.
Sunday's are the worst
Member
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 959
Good morning, all. This is day 2 for me.
Scott Kiloby's book and the mindfulness practice he recommends are turning out to be helpful. I even do the practice sometimes when I wake up in the middle of the night. Over the years several people have told me that I live too much in my head or too much in the past or future, and I'm starting to agree with them.
Many say that addicts are self-centered, but maybe we could also say that addicts are generally off-center in relation to how things are and how they themselves are in the present moment, with the focus of attention being elsewhere or some imaginary elsewhen.
I should get away from the computer and spend a few minutes here and there exercising and doing a little housework, along the lines of enacting a better lifestyle as opposed to only not drinking.
The path of negligence leads to the palace of squalor.
Scott Kiloby's book and the mindfulness practice he recommends are turning out to be helpful. I even do the practice sometimes when I wake up in the middle of the night. Over the years several people have told me that I live too much in my head or too much in the past or future, and I'm starting to agree with them.
Many say that addicts are self-centered, but maybe we could also say that addicts are generally off-center in relation to how things are and how they themselves are in the present moment, with the focus of attention being elsewhere or some imaginary elsewhen.
I should get away from the computer and spend a few minutes here and there exercising and doing a little housework, along the lines of enacting a better lifestyle as opposed to only not drinking.
The path of negligence leads to the palace of squalor.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Canada
Posts: 3
Good morning! Oh my goodness yes the few times I have started mindfulness meditating lately have been a huge help too I'm going to do one this morning. I'm still having quite a bit of anxiety even after 20 days, so frustrating how you think drinking will help anxiety and it does initially but then it wrecks havoc in your nervous system and makes it a billion times worse but somehow I always forget that part. I saw a TED talk on mindfulness meditation and they did a study on a group of 30 yr olds those that started meditating daily and those that didn't in 5 years the group that didn't had aged there body to average 36 yrs but those who did meditate there body including hearing, skin elasticity, vision were more on par with 23 year olds. The point of the talk was when we say we don't have time to meditate it's really not true because in the long run we will lose more lifetime not meditating. Anyways just thought it was interesting. Taking my son to a park with another girl from my Daytox program and her son so looking forward to a fun sober day enjoying the sun with them.
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Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 959
Originally Posted by Sascha25
I saw a TED talk on mindfulness meditation and they did a study on a group of 30 yr olds those that started meditating daily and those that didn't in 5 years the group that didn't had aged there body to average 36 yrs but those who did meditate there body including hearing, skin elasticity, vision were more on par with 23 year olds. The point of the talk was when we say we don't have time to meditate it's really not true because in the long run we will lose more lifetime not meditating.
It makes sense to me. A regular meditation practice (of the observation and "let it be" variety) probably helps to dissolve chronic stress, tension and guardedness or armor ("shields up!") which must have health benefits.
I have also started to do a short set of Kung Fu warm-up exercises to loosen my joints. I'm starting to feel looser from that and the mindfulness, even after only a few days.
One of my heroes:
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Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Hampshire UK
Posts: 162
Yes Tynesider22 - I agree - I have found it almost impossible to lose weight in the past as a drinker. Not surprising as I was probably consuming at least an extra 1000+ calories a day in booze. Plus I think alcohol sort of stops the liver dealing with calories from food (it is too busy dealing with the alcohol). I have been reading up a lot about liver health these past few days and have begun to realise how vital it is to our general well being. Def. not something to poison with alcohol.
Anyway, Day 5 for me now. Am feeling OK but strangely lazy and finding it difficult to work or concentrate. Hope all is going well for others
DeepBlue
Anyway, Day 5 for me now. Am feeling OK but strangely lazy and finding it difficult to work or concentrate. Hope all is going well for others
DeepBlue
Keep Going
Join Date: Apr 2017
Location: England
Posts: 1,530
At 16 days I'm forgetting how bad days 1-3 were.
Been up-country to stay w/a friend this weekend and managed it sober, despite being asked to make a G&T. I did about 8 hours of driving which is way out of my comfort zone but listened to hours of Jo and Charlie (?) talking about AA. Great stuff.
Think I understand a bit more about why I kept relapsing and the physical / spiritual disease. I'm not even frightened about how often the word "change" cropped up on the CD. I'm really looking forward to being a bit more zen. I bought Beginners Mind by Suzuki (?) and hope I can meditate soon.
I do have HALTS though which is why I'm posting. I'm not getting enough sleep and no matter if I go to bed exhausted I just lie there. Maybe tonight's the night. Actually, maybe its the fact that this addict stuck TWO nicotine patches on... oops.
Keep posting everyone, it's a lifeline x
Been up-country to stay w/a friend this weekend and managed it sober, despite being asked to make a G&T. I did about 8 hours of driving which is way out of my comfort zone but listened to hours of Jo and Charlie (?) talking about AA. Great stuff.
Think I understand a bit more about why I kept relapsing and the physical / spiritual disease. I'm not even frightened about how often the word "change" cropped up on the CD. I'm really looking forward to being a bit more zen. I bought Beginners Mind by Suzuki (?) and hope I can meditate soon.
I do have HALTS though which is why I'm posting. I'm not getting enough sleep and no matter if I go to bed exhausted I just lie there. Maybe tonight's the night. Actually, maybe its the fact that this addict stuck TWO nicotine patches on... oops.
Keep posting everyone, it's a lifeline x
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,217
Originally Posted by FixItDad
It seems like forever that I wrote "Day 3 done" but it was only Friday night. Last night was really difficult. The AV was HAMMERING me. Also the stresses of finances, moving, the business really piled up. Wanted to check out so bad.
I didn't. I should feel better about it this morning but don't really. Waking up with a headache. Another full day today, we have an open house so we have to get the place cleaned up and clear out.
Not sure what's going on, just have a lot of depression piling up. Withdrawls? Went to the suicide forum last night. Reminded me things are not that bad but damn, this is a really rough patch of life right now.
Sunday's are the worst
I didn't. I should feel better about it this morning but don't really. Waking up with a headache. Another full day today, we have an open house so we have to get the place cleaned up and clear out.
Not sure what's going on, just have a lot of depression piling up. Withdrawls? Went to the suicide forum last night. Reminded me things are not that bad but damn, this is a really rough patch of life right now.
Sunday's are the worst
I can relate to the stress of having to show the house over and over again - definitely a PIA but remember it's only temporary!
As for the depression, I do think it is natural in early sobriety. We are going to feel those things that we masked before- those things we couldn't deal with or didn't want to address or look at. Please hang in there and keep doing whatever you are doing that is keeping you sober. If you aren't feeling so well you could also reach out to your doctor- I want you to be safe in addition to sober, you know?
I wanted to write more but my Dad just got here..Check in later if you can ...
Member
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 32
Good to hear from all of you and your experiences. I relapsed last Tuesday on a day binge. With the warm weather kicking in in San Diego, social gathering invitations really pick up a pace. Friday, I did manage to go out and have 3 beers in a 6 hrs period. I also started meds
( naltrexone). Saturday morning I had a very bad craving, but came to SR and fortunately enough found a wonderful soul to chat. I also started on bupropion. The idea of using meds is to help with the first phase of recovery, detox- kind of help weaning out of the bottle so to speak. In an 89 degree weather, got my kids and off to the beach to meet friends. Sure enough, they had a beer to offer. I passed the offer without much problem or anxiety. At night at a dinner party, I manage to have just one beer although I forgot to take the naltrexone.
People obviously are starting to notice. Yesterday I just told them that, before, I used to get happy when drinking but not anymore, so I no longer feel like drinking. They all understood with supportive comments, so they stopped asking me if I wanted another drink.
Since the relapse last week, things that I changed other than starting meds:
( naltrexone). Saturday morning I had a very bad craving, but came to SR and fortunately enough found a wonderful soul to chat. I also started on bupropion. The idea of using meds is to help with the first phase of recovery, detox- kind of help weaning out of the bottle so to speak. In an 89 degree weather, got my kids and off to the beach to meet friends. Sure enough, they had a beer to offer. I passed the offer without much problem or anxiety. At night at a dinner party, I manage to have just one beer although I forgot to take the naltrexone.
People obviously are starting to notice. Yesterday I just told them that, before, I used to get happy when drinking but not anymore, so I no longer feel like drinking. They all understood with supportive comments, so they stopped asking me if I wanted another drink.
Since the relapse last week, things that I changed other than starting meds:
- trying 15 min meditation daily
- 15-20 min work out
- SR as soon as crave starts
Member
Join Date: May 2017
Posts: 32
Originally Posted by FixItDad
It seems like forever that I wrote "Day 3 done" but it was only Friday night. Last night was really difficult. The AV was HAMMERING me. Also the stresses of finances, moving, the business really piled up. Wanted to check out so bad.
I didn't. I should feel better about it this morning but don't really. Waking up with a headache. Another full day today, we have an open house so we have to get the place cleaned up and clear out.
Not sure what's going on, just have a lot of depression piling up. Withdrawls? Went to the suicide forum last night. Reminded me things are not that bad but damn, this is a really rough patch of life right now.
Sunday's are the worst
I didn't. I should feel better about it this morning but don't really. Waking up with a headache. Another full day today, we have an open house so we have to get the place cleaned up and clear out.
Not sure what's going on, just have a lot of depression piling up. Withdrawls? Went to the suicide forum last night. Reminded me things are not that bad but damn, this is a really rough patch of life right now.
Sunday's are the worst
Good to hear you got over day 3!! I find day 3 awful to deal with as well. It does sound like withdraw syndrome to me. Some people do experience overwhelming thoughts like you shared, consider talking to your doctor for a referral to help you get through this initial phase of detox. Hope you show up to share your day tonight.
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Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Phoenix
Posts: 1,189
[QUOTE=Sunflowerlife;6466239]
Then I had a drinking dream where I took a couple swigs from a rum bottle [I](which happens to be the last drink I had.)
I also have "drinking dreams", or maybe I should call them nightmares. I am drunk and panicked about being late for work, car keys are lost, purse has been stolen, and I am stuck in a strange place!
I really believe that this is my sub-conscious reminding me of what booze will do to my life if I ever use again!!
Stay strong May friends
Then I had a drinking dream where I took a couple swigs from a rum bottle [I](which happens to be the last drink I had.)
I also have "drinking dreams", or maybe I should call them nightmares. I am drunk and panicked about being late for work, car keys are lost, purse has been stolen, and I am stuck in a strange place!
I really believe that this is my sub-conscious reminding me of what booze will do to my life if I ever use again!!
Stay strong May friends
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,366
welcome TWTOM
Great going on 3 weeks solarion & congrats to everyone else hitting a milestone today
To those doing it tough I have no doubt you;re on the right road. It's not always going to be as hard as this - it gets better
D
Great going on 3 weeks solarion & congrats to everyone else hitting a milestone today
To those doing it tough I have no doubt you;re on the right road. It's not always going to be as hard as this - it gets better
D
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: AUD
Posts: 359
11hrs into Day 6, going strong with Zero desire to drink.
6 days ago my anxiety had got so bad I was struggling to drop my kids off at school. That was a turning point for me.
Today I feel terrific, social interactions are a breeze. I haven't felt this alive in years. Life is good. Stay strong people. Best of luck getting through today.
6 days ago my anxiety had got so bad I was struggling to drop my kids off at school. That was a turning point for me.
Today I feel terrific, social interactions are a breeze. I haven't felt this alive in years. Life is good. Stay strong people. Best of luck getting through today.
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