Class of February 2017 Support Thread Part 5
Member
Join Date: Jan 2017
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 611
Company party tonight went well. Didn't endure too much ribbing due to walking around with a Solo cup full of soda.
From Nov. '14 to Feb. '17 I'm guessing I had a total of less than three dozen sober nights. After each one, I'd feel better, and you know the rest. A few times I even strung together two in a row. But this February, something clicked. Combination of feeling like crap every morning, sweats, bloating, discovering SR, etc. ... whatever it was, it just clicked. And I realize I'm lucky as hell to have that going for me, that after two decades of moderate to heavy drinking, it just clicked. I also know that it might not ever be so straightforward again.
I guess my point is, if you see an opening, exploit the hell out of it. Even just four months has yielded so many benefits I never expected.
From Nov. '14 to Feb. '17 I'm guessing I had a total of less than three dozen sober nights. After each one, I'd feel better, and you know the rest. A few times I even strung together two in a row. But this February, something clicked. Combination of feeling like crap every morning, sweats, bloating, discovering SR, etc. ... whatever it was, it just clicked. And I realize I'm lucky as hell to have that going for me, that after two decades of moderate to heavy drinking, it just clicked. I also know that it might not ever be so straightforward again.
I guess my point is, if you see an opening, exploit the hell out of it. Even just four months has yielded so many benefits I never expected.
Meow
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: The Great Lakes State
Posts: 1,585
You're not alone, Canguy. Important thing is you are back in the saddle.
I'm going to join you. After three weekends in a row of "slipping", I had massive cravings when I left work today. That was NOT my idea of a good thing. Rather pissed me off, to be honest. Plus, I'm only down about a pound and a half in three weeks. That doesn't give me warm fuzzies either.
I'm going to join you. After three weekends in a row of "slipping", I had massive cravings when I left work today. That was NOT my idea of a good thing. Rather pissed me off, to be honest. Plus, I'm only down about a pound and a half in three weeks. That doesn't give me warm fuzzies either.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Northeast, US
Posts: 2,073
It seems we're on similar paths. I'm taking care of myself. I'm less frustrated and paying less attention to what I can't control. My therapist brought up how I've been relentlessly trying to figure out an escape in my head to gain control over my own destiny. Like I've said there's stuff I can't say on here. He said, 'how's that going for you?' about my trying to look at every angle and find a solution. I said, 'not good, I'm banging my head against a brick wall. I'm going around in a loop. Maybe I should stop that and try something else.' Since then I've been doing it far less.
My friend is still at the Clinic far away. No money. No hope. No help. And I'm not picking up the phone mostly. It's like taking a damn bullet wound everytime.
My sister is trying to get me to work (kind of volunteer) a few hours a few days a week at her business to get me out of my head. She's a blessing for me. A great sister. But also has the attitude and language of a real BI.... many times.
I've got the cash to get a bike. I've started looking more calmly at my options and not worrying about this one or that one. There are a few attractive ones out there. I'm leaning toward a Honda 500 right now. An experienced rider told me that ABS brakes are a lifesaver for new riders. That'll cost me. The Honda 500 with ABS is more. Most of the time a person drops a bike because they lock the rear wheel and it slides out in an emergency. Of course on wet pavement the antilock is AMAZING. You need a ton of experience to make up for what ABS does for you. Then there's bright yellow helmets and jackets, and added lighting which are preventing folks from pulling out in front of you pretty well. The ABS brakes alone make it 1/3 less likely you'll have an accident. However the awesome deal and one that I would not stress on buying doesn't have it. It's very inexpensive. Is ABS worth $1000? Dunno. Is a really high tech helmet worth $800? Probably. I can't afford it, but considering the possibilities, it is.
I'm babbling. We'll see. I'm putting in the hands of The Universe.
Tired and time for sleep. Higher dose of that newer med is funky for me right now. I could see it really working well.
Viper
My friend is still at the Clinic far away. No money. No hope. No help. And I'm not picking up the phone mostly. It's like taking a damn bullet wound everytime.
My sister is trying to get me to work (kind of volunteer) a few hours a few days a week at her business to get me out of my head. She's a blessing for me. A great sister. But also has the attitude and language of a real BI.... many times.
I've got the cash to get a bike. I've started looking more calmly at my options and not worrying about this one or that one. There are a few attractive ones out there. I'm leaning toward a Honda 500 right now. An experienced rider told me that ABS brakes are a lifesaver for new riders. That'll cost me. The Honda 500 with ABS is more. Most of the time a person drops a bike because they lock the rear wheel and it slides out in an emergency. Of course on wet pavement the antilock is AMAZING. You need a ton of experience to make up for what ABS does for you. Then there's bright yellow helmets and jackets, and added lighting which are preventing folks from pulling out in front of you pretty well. The ABS brakes alone make it 1/3 less likely you'll have an accident. However the awesome deal and one that I would not stress on buying doesn't have it. It's very inexpensive. Is ABS worth $1000? Dunno. Is a really high tech helmet worth $800? Probably. I can't afford it, but considering the possibilities, it is.
I'm babbling. We'll see. I'm putting in the hands of The Universe.
Tired and time for sleep. Higher dose of that newer med is funky for me right now. I could see it really working well.
Viper
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: PA
Posts: 588
Retired guy, I am worrying about myself. Class of Feb but I'm not sober. Joined SR in 15 but I'm not sober.
I need to change my attitude and/or perspective. I've had moments where I have started to admit I'm an alcoholic but they haven't lasted and I haven't taken longer term actions as such.
I am starting to think treatment is necessary but I can't imagine missing that much time from work. Just this week I have tried expressing my interest in taking off Friday and have since cancelled that plan.
I must need AA, my psychologist, my parents, a plan.... I can't just "decide to" or flip some switch.
I need to say, "I am never going to drink again and I am never going to change my mind." And mean it. And live it.
I need to change my attitude and/or perspective. I've had moments where I have started to admit I'm an alcoholic but they haven't lasted and I haven't taken longer term actions as such.
I am starting to think treatment is necessary but I can't imagine missing that much time from work. Just this week I have tried expressing my interest in taking off Friday and have since cancelled that plan.
I must need AA, my psychologist, my parents, a plan.... I can't just "decide to" or flip some switch.
I need to say, "I am never going to drink again and I am never going to change my mind." And mean it. And live it.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: PA
Posts: 588
Well, I meant what I said. I told my mother, my boss, and my employee that I need help and I am prepared to seek it. I have found that past efforts have been more successful when I inform others of my issues and intent to work on them. The accountability is a motivator.
I am looking up AA meetings - there is one in my area nearly every night. Honestly, I view AA still as "detention" but I am thinking I should consider it more of a club I can join with like minded individuals with a common goal.
I am looking up AA meetings - there is one in my area nearly every night. Honestly, I view AA still as "detention" but I am thinking I should consider it more of a club I can join with like minded individuals with a common goal.
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,355
I think these links are very valuable:
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...very-plan.html
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
We're all here cos we want change.
A vote for drinking again is a vote for stagnation and no change.
That's the basis of what kept me motivated that first year.
I wanted to be better than I was.
I wanted to be all I could be.
I couldn't do that drinking.
D
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...very-plan.html
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ery-plans.html
We're all here cos we want change.
A vote for drinking again is a vote for stagnation and no change.
That's the basis of what kept me motivated that first year.
I wanted to be better than I was.
I wanted to be all I could be.
I couldn't do that drinking.
D
Member
Join Date: Feb 2017
Posts: 252
Sober Day # 122 after being dependent on wine, daily, for years.
************************************************** *******************
I can not believe that I made it to 4 months ( a third of a year!) without a drop of alcohol! Whenever the thought of drinking comes into my mind, the main thing that stops me is that I know it would be a death sentence for me. At the time that I quit, I was starting to get medical symptoms (my blood pressure was up, GI problems, etc.)
I KNOW I have a problem. I had no control over it. If I ever had just one glass again, I don't know if I would ever be able to stop again----I feel like this is my last chance. Therefore, I will never drink again.
I am so glad to be free from that prison! Now, I have the blood pressure of a teenager ( and I am old) All of the medical symptoms are gone now, and I feel such a sense of peaceful calm, and no more shame.
I want to thank all of you for your help, I so greatly appreciate it. I couldn't have done it without all of you.
Axeman, I have never been to an AA meeting, but they really help a lot of people. Do whatever you have to do to quit.
I think you are viewing quitting as deprivation----try viewing it as freedom----no longer having to have the argument with the beast every day, because the issue of drinking is completely off the table.
Have you done the AVRT mini course?
https://rational.org/index.php?id=253
That ^^^^,
and this book (which is similar): The Easy Way to Stop Drinking by Allen Carr
were the 2 things that helped me the most, besides this site.
When that voice starts telling you that you can drink, you will recognize it as the AV, and you will control IT. You can do it!
************************************************** *******************
I can not believe that I made it to 4 months ( a third of a year!) without a drop of alcohol! Whenever the thought of drinking comes into my mind, the main thing that stops me is that I know it would be a death sentence for me. At the time that I quit, I was starting to get medical symptoms (my blood pressure was up, GI problems, etc.)
I KNOW I have a problem. I had no control over it. If I ever had just one glass again, I don't know if I would ever be able to stop again----I feel like this is my last chance. Therefore, I will never drink again.
I am so glad to be free from that prison! Now, I have the blood pressure of a teenager ( and I am old) All of the medical symptoms are gone now, and I feel such a sense of peaceful calm, and no more shame.
I want to thank all of you for your help, I so greatly appreciate it. I couldn't have done it without all of you.
Axeman, I have never been to an AA meeting, but they really help a lot of people. Do whatever you have to do to quit.
Honestly, I view AA still as "detention"
Have you done the AVRT mini course?
https://rational.org/index.php?id=253
That ^^^^,
and this book (which is similar): The Easy Way to Stop Drinking by Allen Carr
were the 2 things that helped me the most, besides this site.
When that voice starts telling you that you can drink, you will recognize it as the AV, and you will control IT. You can do it!
Guest
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 1,174
Great post and congratulations Dau. You have done so well.
You are spot on re deprivation v freedom. I feel I'm transitioning into a different state...obviously not entirely there yet. But I have come to genuinely enjoy living sober. The last drinking bout....I missed my sober life. That was a first for me. A day without the temporary escape of alcohol is no longer a day that could have been fun, an opportunity missed.
Mister Axe. Dau is right. Maybe the problem is seeing alcohol as reward for 'time served' sober. This is how its been for me, its what I've got to get beyond next.
All the best
Later
You are spot on re deprivation v freedom. I feel I'm transitioning into a different state...obviously not entirely there yet. But I have come to genuinely enjoy living sober. The last drinking bout....I missed my sober life. That was a first for me. A day without the temporary escape of alcohol is no longer a day that could have been fun, an opportunity missed.
Mister Axe. Dau is right. Maybe the problem is seeing alcohol as reward for 'time served' sober. This is how its been for me, its what I've got to get beyond next.
All the best
Later
Member
Join Date: Feb 2017
Location: North Georgia Mountains
Posts: 588
Well said Dau and congrats on 4 months. I feel much like you. When I used to give it up for short periods it felt like I was depriving myself. Now that I haven't drank for awhile I am also feeling a sense of freedom and it is a wonderful thing!
Meow
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: The Great Lakes State
Posts: 1,585
Congrats Dau &RetiredGuy!
I agree about the feelings of freedom. Definitely felt that with quitting smoking too.
I'm checking in without any cravings today. lol. Maybe my anger at them scared them away!
I agree about the feelings of freedom. Definitely felt that with quitting smoking too.
I'm checking in without any cravings today. lol. Maybe my anger at them scared them away!
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