Class of January 2017 Support Thread Part 5
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Class of January 2017 Support Thread Part 5
01/28/2017
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Vancouver
Posts: 74
thought i would check in on this nice saturday night.
i must say it is nice to see so many people sticking around in this class. congrats to everyone on their milestones! i don't check in every day but i do catch up and read any updates each day, part of my routine. keep up the good work everyone
it is day 50 for me, just over 7 weeks. this is the longest sober time i have had in over 5 years and it feels great!
things are starting to mellow out a bit as far as the emotional rollercoaster goes. sleep is becoming more regular and energy levels are getting better.
i find myself in a more grateful mindset more often than not, even if i am having an off day. my brain has always been very good at glossing over the bad times, in the past i would often get wound up and drag out small problems and virtually forget how bad things have been in the past. i cant seem to let that happen right now, any time i start getting annoyed at something i remind myself what i was going through only 50 days ago and i immediately feel more calm.
i have always been one to avoid going to meetings. right now though i find myself actually looking forward to them, they feel like a release every time i go. that said, even though booze was my go to i find myself more at home in the NA meetings local to me. i am already part of a regular friday night get together after the meeting and i'm starting to get an inkling of a social life(never had any when i was drinking, i was a loner drunk). i've even started getting in touch with friends from way back when i was clean 5-10 years ago.
otherwise i still have a lot of work to do to clean up the wreckage as far as work and finances go but hey, at least i'm still alive and actually willing to do what i need to do. everything that felt insurmountable before no longer feels that way. in fact it is kind of funny, i used to stress out about money so much but the reality was i was stressing out about possibly not being able to fund my booze addiction. now i no longer need to come up with that money and i am paying my other bills faster than i was before, as a result i am not nearly as stressed about money anymore even though i am still pretty broke.......good stuff
i must say it is nice to see so many people sticking around in this class. congrats to everyone on their milestones! i don't check in every day but i do catch up and read any updates each day, part of my routine. keep up the good work everyone
it is day 50 for me, just over 7 weeks. this is the longest sober time i have had in over 5 years and it feels great!
things are starting to mellow out a bit as far as the emotional rollercoaster goes. sleep is becoming more regular and energy levels are getting better.
i find myself in a more grateful mindset more often than not, even if i am having an off day. my brain has always been very good at glossing over the bad times, in the past i would often get wound up and drag out small problems and virtually forget how bad things have been in the past. i cant seem to let that happen right now, any time i start getting annoyed at something i remind myself what i was going through only 50 days ago and i immediately feel more calm.
i have always been one to avoid going to meetings. right now though i find myself actually looking forward to them, they feel like a release every time i go. that said, even though booze was my go to i find myself more at home in the NA meetings local to me. i am already part of a regular friday night get together after the meeting and i'm starting to get an inkling of a social life(never had any when i was drinking, i was a loner drunk). i've even started getting in touch with friends from way back when i was clean 5-10 years ago.
otherwise i still have a lot of work to do to clean up the wreckage as far as work and finances go but hey, at least i'm still alive and actually willing to do what i need to do. everything that felt insurmountable before no longer feels that way. in fact it is kind of funny, i used to stress out about money so much but the reality was i was stressing out about possibly not being able to fund my booze addiction. now i no longer need to come up with that money and i am paying my other bills faster than i was before, as a result i am not nearly as stressed about money anymore even though i am still pretty broke.......good stuff
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Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: NH
Posts: 374
Originally Posted by jv369 
it is day 50 for me, just over 7 weeks. this is the longest sober time i have had in over 5 years and it feels great!
I have been thinking about this for quite a while: I went 20 years drinking very heavily at least 3-4 nights a week. I once "quit" for about 4 weeks. So, I simply haven't been sober for real since I was a teenager.
That this was perfect "normal" in my mind, or at least defensible as "not so bad" is crazy.
Anyway, enjoy your Sundays people! No plans here, but that;s what Sundays are for, I guess.
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 941
Day78.
Class thread number 5! I seem to remember falling off the wagon the first times I tried this while on SR class thread 2. I really should look up who I was with then and let them know I am well. Other than Dee they probably don't know I lost my way for a while but made it back OK. I have no intention of repeating that and I am very much here to stay. Maybe I needed to bottom-out. Although I am very sorry for what my bottoming-out caused to others.
Like you, JV, I have wreckage finances and other big life issues to deal with that are a result of my past life. I am also calmer and strong enough to deal with painful issues now, without the need to get sh*tfaced, leaving others to deal with my mess or to suffer with me.
It might have been NACN or Ina who said they felt more like a responsible adult now, but it kind of does.
NACN, I agree. You have now changed so maybe a name change is possible ? Whatever you decide, NACN works for all of us. I feel very lucky to be in the same SR class thread as you.
Have a healthy, happy and sober Sunday, or whatever day/timezone you are in. One more day.
Class thread number 5! I seem to remember falling off the wagon the first times I tried this while on SR class thread 2. I really should look up who I was with then and let them know I am well. Other than Dee they probably don't know I lost my way for a while but made it back OK. I have no intention of repeating that and I am very much here to stay. Maybe I needed to bottom-out. Although I am very sorry for what my bottoming-out caused to others.
Like you, JV, I have wreckage finances and other big life issues to deal with that are a result of my past life. I am also calmer and strong enough to deal with painful issues now, without the need to get sh*tfaced, leaving others to deal with my mess or to suffer with me.
It might have been NACN or Ina who said they felt more like a responsible adult now, but it kind of does.
NACN, I agree. You have now changed so maybe a name change is possible ? Whatever you decide, NACN works for all of us. I feel very lucky to be in the same SR class thread as you.
Have a healthy, happy and sober Sunday, or whatever day/timezone you are in. One more day.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2017
Location: Toronto
Posts: 268
Day 78 here
Well, I made it through the weekend, but I can 100% say that would not have been the case without each and every one of you. Friday night my AV was LOUD! YELLING, SCREAMING, TAUNTING!!! I went on SR for the Friday meeting and that helped but then I found out all of my friends were at a pub close by for St. Patricks Day. I ended up going down and honestly, in my head I was already convinced I was done…after all it was a holiday…my birthday the next day….I had just bought new clothes…(basically any justification I could muster up) but then a funny thing happened. I got down there and everyone was drinking and loud and I just had this enormous feeling of sadness. People were slurring and laughing at basically nothing and having nonsense conversations and it just felt so inauthentic. I then thought of all of you and your encouragement and how well we've all done together and that was all I needed. I stayed and had a diet coke and tried to chat with a few friends for awhile and then I went home. Once home I was almost in tears - happy tears. I was so emotional and grateful to be sober. That feeling of gratitude carried me through the whole weekend. Last night at dinner, I happily ate and came home and played cards with my family. My parents are gone now, but I know they enjoyed their time with me. I wasn’t hungover, I kept early morning plans and was actually “present”.
I know going to the bar was like playing Russian Roulette and I may not get away that easy next time and will have to work on a better plan to stay away entirely, but for now I'm just so grateful. It’s funny, while down at the bar at first, I played a mind game where I mentally tried to list all of your names and it seemed to help – I’m going to add that to the list of what to recite when a craving hits
You all are amazing people. Thank you so much. Hope you all had a fantastic weekend.
Well, I made it through the weekend, but I can 100% say that would not have been the case without each and every one of you. Friday night my AV was LOUD! YELLING, SCREAMING, TAUNTING!!! I went on SR for the Friday meeting and that helped but then I found out all of my friends were at a pub close by for St. Patricks Day. I ended up going down and honestly, in my head I was already convinced I was done…after all it was a holiday…my birthday the next day….I had just bought new clothes…(basically any justification I could muster up) but then a funny thing happened. I got down there and everyone was drinking and loud and I just had this enormous feeling of sadness. People were slurring and laughing at basically nothing and having nonsense conversations and it just felt so inauthentic. I then thought of all of you and your encouragement and how well we've all done together and that was all I needed. I stayed and had a diet coke and tried to chat with a few friends for awhile and then I went home. Once home I was almost in tears - happy tears. I was so emotional and grateful to be sober. That feeling of gratitude carried me through the whole weekend. Last night at dinner, I happily ate and came home and played cards with my family. My parents are gone now, but I know they enjoyed their time with me. I wasn’t hungover, I kept early morning plans and was actually “present”.
I know going to the bar was like playing Russian Roulette and I may not get away that easy next time and will have to work on a better plan to stay away entirely, but for now I'm just so grateful. It’s funny, while down at the bar at first, I played a mind game where I mentally tried to list all of your names and it seemed to help – I’m going to add that to the list of what to recite when a craving hits
You all are amazing people. Thank you so much. Hope you all had a fantastic weekend.
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 941
Day79.
Ina, thank you for sharing that. You amazingly got through that situation and all the temptation. The main thing is that you didn't drink. It sounds like reality sunk in when you arrived at the pub and you stayed true the new you. You should feel proud of yourself. I bet your parents were happy also.
My weekend was less dramatic. Just keeping myself busy with my weekend to-do list, which i did not complete as expected, and reading a few of the other forums on SR. Reading new posts helped me remind what I am doing this for and stave off any complacency.
I again slept terribly last night, as I seem to on Sundays. But that is 100% OK, I am grateful to be hungover free and optimistic to see what happens this week.
A shorter one today as I am running a bit late. Have a healthy, happy and sober week Januararians. One more day.
Ina, thank you for sharing that. You amazingly got through that situation and all the temptation. The main thing is that you didn't drink. It sounds like reality sunk in when you arrived at the pub and you stayed true the new you. You should feel proud of yourself. I bet your parents were happy also.
My weekend was less dramatic. Just keeping myself busy with my weekend to-do list, which i did not complete as expected, and reading a few of the other forums on SR. Reading new posts helped me remind what I am doing this for and stave off any complacency.
I again slept terribly last night, as I seem to on Sundays. But that is 100% OK, I am grateful to be hungover free and optimistic to see what happens this week.
A shorter one today as I am running a bit late. Have a healthy, happy and sober week Januararians. One more day.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 354
Hi guys. Day 53 here. Had a good weekend. My husband had a couple of Guinness on Friday evening. Used to be a thing with us to have some Guinness on St Paddys day but didn't happen this year.
So well done Ina for the strength you showed on Friday night. You must be so proud of yourself. Also happy belated birthday. Xx
Hi Dontlookbacchus, hope your sleep pattern gets back on track soon. Xx
Hi cute and all my January family. Have a great day everyone. ❤️
So well done Ina for the strength you showed on Friday night. You must be so proud of yourself. Also happy belated birthday. Xx
Hi Dontlookbacchus, hope your sleep pattern gets back on track soon. Xx
Hi cute and all my January family. Have a great day everyone. ❤️
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Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: NH
Posts: 374
Great work Ina! That's a great achievement and shows your commitment to sobriety! Every time you come through a difficult time like this the more "normal" it will feel not to drink, I think.
I don't have a lot to say today; tomorrow will be 60 days; the day after will be two calendar months!
Keeping going everyone!
I don't have a lot to say today; tomorrow will be 60 days; the day after will be two calendar months!
Keeping going everyone!
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Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: California
Posts: 1,914
Hi everyone!
I've been so busy with work I haven't been posting in here much. I still do my other daily threads, but I'm slacking in the class! Just wanted to say hi - still doing good here! Just enjoying waking up every morning not hung over
I've been so busy with work I haven't been posting in here much. I still do my other daily threads, but I'm slacking in the class! Just wanted to say hi - still doing good here! Just enjoying waking up every morning not hung over
Member
Join Date: Feb 2017
Posts: 13
day 51....getting worse or the same
51 days sober and I feel more irritable particularly with my husband. Everything he does annoys me. I also feel tired. Maybe because I'm exercising too much to fill the gap... I miss the drunken days in front of the TV. If something is too difficult now or someone is not nice to me I feel like abandoning the cause and going back into the bubble. I try to keep busy but sometimes it just feels like past times. I thought being sober will bring me closer to my husband but it's the opposite. Drinking was really enjoyable together...we used to talk about lots of things... of course, I used to get really angry at him too and sometimes aggressive. I know to go back to drinking will be bad for my life but there is this feeling, a romantic feeling of self destruction without care. It's funny because I went to the Buddhist center and one of the reflections was: "I may die today" ... when thinking this, the first thought is: "I will drink a few bottles of prosecco before diying"
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Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 941
Day79.
Good morning. Nice to see you back Site. And well done hitting 60 days MrM !
Thanks Kimmy. I slept better but yesterday the lack of sleep affected my mood at work. I was definitely more highly strung and less confident or in control. Work felt slightly like when I was drinking last year but obviously not as bad. More like a reminder. Today should be different hopefully.
I tend to manage my week/sobriety journey by sticking to a regular routine. We all do it differently I suppose. I decided when I started to just put one foot in front of the other and get through the week. Since that plan has worked so far, I just stuck to it. That said, I have a few ideas to change things up next weekend and see if it helps with my insomnia. Just exercise/rest/diet/work but worth a try.
Reading over SR last weekend, it is easy to see how many people were affected by St. Patrick's day. To me, I felt more like a content outsider, looking at it going on and not missing it one bit. For some newcomers to sobriety, it was their first major temptation to hang-out again and drink with friends. A major cause of their AV to reappear again. It might be that the social drinkers had it hardest, while solitary drinkers, like myself, were less affected.
Either way, reading SR, I realised how many people struggled, fell off, or have now given up booze since last weekend. I suppose St. Patrick's is the one of the few days in the calendar that people get a pass to wear green and get sh*tfaced without any social stigma. This can be a big temptation for many of us to "feel normal again".
I feel lucky I wasn't affected but empathise with those in recovery who were.
I am off for my bike ride. Have a healthy, happy and sober Tuesday. One more day !
Good morning. Nice to see you back Site. And well done hitting 60 days MrM !
Thanks Kimmy. I slept better but yesterday the lack of sleep affected my mood at work. I was definitely more highly strung and less confident or in control. Work felt slightly like when I was drinking last year but obviously not as bad. More like a reminder. Today should be different hopefully.
I tend to manage my week/sobriety journey by sticking to a regular routine. We all do it differently I suppose. I decided when I started to just put one foot in front of the other and get through the week. Since that plan has worked so far, I just stuck to it. That said, I have a few ideas to change things up next weekend and see if it helps with my insomnia. Just exercise/rest/diet/work but worth a try.
Reading over SR last weekend, it is easy to see how many people were affected by St. Patrick's day. To me, I felt more like a content outsider, looking at it going on and not missing it one bit. For some newcomers to sobriety, it was their first major temptation to hang-out again and drink with friends. A major cause of their AV to reappear again. It might be that the social drinkers had it hardest, while solitary drinkers, like myself, were less affected.
Either way, reading SR, I realised how many people struggled, fell off, or have now given up booze since last weekend. I suppose St. Patrick's is the one of the few days in the calendar that people get a pass to wear green and get sh*tfaced without any social stigma. This can be a big temptation for many of us to "feel normal again".
I feel lucky I wasn't affected but empathise with those in recovery who were.
I am off for my bike ride. Have a healthy, happy and sober Tuesday. One more day !
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Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: NH
Posts: 374
Originally Posted by bubita
I used to get really angry at him too and sometimes aggressive. I know to go back to drinking will be bad for my life but there is this feeling, a romantic feeling of self destruction without care.
Hi Bubita,
Firstly, congrats on 50+ days. That is awesome!
I also used to justify my drinking in a kind of nihilistic, self-destructive way. But I really think this was my addiction finding justifications to drink... I tell myself that there is nothing romantic about cirrhosis and early death.
I also had a huge slump around 50 days, and was very depressed and restless. Very, very irritable. It helped me to think of this as my addiction as readjusting to my new sobriety and trying out some new tactics to try and get me to drink again.
The slump past pretty quickly. Stick at it!
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